post baby body

Leslie - posted on 11/22/2009 ( 7 moms have responded )

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Ok so... I know its only been 6 months, but this extra weight is killing me. I gained 35 lbs in my pregnancy. I have lost 25 lbs so far but seem to be stuck. I am still breastfeeding 3x a day. My husband is not attracted to me with the weight and I am not happy with it either. I have been bike riding and walk/running for a month now and dont see any change. I still have stretch marks that wont go way despite my obsession with cocoa butter creams. I still have hemorrhoids despite the prescription meds my OB gave me. My hair use to be thick prior to the pregnancy and now I have lost over half of my thickness (no bald spots yet). I am scared to completely wean because I have heard that many women gain weight after doing so. Am I the only one feeling this way? I dont want to be so negative but it is REALLY bothering me. I am trying to focus on my daughter and how wonderful she is, but I this is killing me. Any one else having these problems or maybe have a suggestion?

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Carolee - posted on 11/22/2009

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Wow... you're husband isn't attracted to you because of 10 POUNDS??? It usually takes about a year to lose the baby weight. And, actually, a lot of women don't even get back to the "10lb to go" mark. I know it's hard, but try to think of it more positively. Your body just preformed a miracle that many women won't ever experience. You brought life into this world. One of my friends put this beautifully after I had my son... she said, "Every mother has EARNED the right to not worry about how her body looks, and still be considered ABSOLUTELY beautiful because of what that body did". After that, I learned to love my stretch marks (which there's no way to get rid of, barring surgery) as proof that I have been through something unique and special. The stretch marks will fade, though... eventually... but they will always be there because they're actual scars.



There are a lot of women who say that confidence will help you lose weight. And, I've been told by many men, that they don't see my extra weight BECAUSE of my confidence. That's the thing they're attracted to.



Good luck, and I hope you reach your goals.

Meghan - posted on 11/22/2009

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You are being way way way too hard on yourself!!! It took you a whole pregnancy to put on the weight and you have only 10lbs to go!! Thats amazing! Keep up what your doing, don't stress over it (stress will only make it worse), and re-assure yourself that your doing great and you have a wonderful daughter! Good Luck :)



p.s... Soooo many of us have the same problems... I have way more weight than you to lose and my little guy is 9 months! But I know it'll come if I work for it :)

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Katie - posted on 12/03/2009

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Dont be hard on yourself - youve had a baby! lol. It is hard work! Im sure you husband doesnt find you unattractive and if he does than he may need a word or two about the huge sacrafise you have made to add to your family. It takes a while to get back to your old self so dont worry about this going on forever. Its just a little uncomfortable as the body adjusts again... you will be your old self soon! Stretchmarks are a pain but you can always find ways to make yourself more comfortable such as using a slimming garment for your tummy or finding flattering clothes. I love those slim'n'lift suits! lol. Theyre my best friend. Keep up what you are doing with exercise because you will see the results! It doesnt happen overnight but it will if you persist :-)

Myra - posted on 11/23/2009

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You're being too hard on yourself over 10lbs...and it's not that 10lbs that has made your husband unattracted to you; he's got another issue and blaming the weight. Strech marks don't have to be a nasty obsession. They can be your rite of passage...we all have them.

Bottom line...you are not the same woman you were. If you relax and take care of yourself- stop stressing over your hair, your weight, and everything else, most of it will clear up on it's own. I lost clumps of hair for about 6 months after my daughter was born...beautiful, thick hair. You gaining weight should be the last reason you do or do not wean. Stop obsessing over your looks!

I don't mean for that to sound mean, but go back and read your post like it was posted by someone else. Your obsession is consuming you, taking away from your wonderful daughter, putting a wedge between you and your husband, and making your problems worse. If you have time to obsess over yourself over things and you have an infant, you aren't giving your daughter enough of you. Sounds mean, I know, but there's a reason most new moms look like hell...

Carolee - posted on 11/23/2009

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Quoting Leslie:

I know Im being hard on myself but I really cant stand the weight. Im feel like I m getting depressed over it and that worries me. I agree about the confidence thing. I have always had low self-esteem but I need to work at that. It might sound shallow but my physical appearance has always been important to me.



Talk to your doctor.  You might be showing signs of the "baby blues".  I was the same way, too.  Low self-esteem and too much pressure to be what everyone ELSE wanted me to be, physically and mentally.  Confidence is hard work, especially at first, but then you kind of get into a stride with it, and it just grows and stays.  Just try to stay positive for the moment.  Your body probably just hit a plateau point in the weight loss.  It's common to have that for a couple of months with any type of weight loss.  Good luck!

Leslie - posted on 11/23/2009

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I know Im being hard on myself but I really cant stand the weight. Im feel like I m getting depressed over it and that worries me. I agree about the confidence thing. I have always had low self-esteem but I need to work at that. It might sound shallow but my physical appearance has always been important to me.

User - posted on 11/22/2009

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you are not alone! I feel the same way. The weight is really a big deal for me. While I was pregnant I thought after I have the baby I'll walk & exercise, but then the weather got nasty & now I can't go outside with my baby for walks. I have hemorrhoids too, but something to help them! Drink V8 juice or some type of Green drink. It will help SO much! I'm sorry you feel this way. Men are just annoying.

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