Quality Time

Tessa - posted on 09/14/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I am a new SAHM with a four month old daughter. I would like to know how much quality time (reading, playing, face-to-face interactions) you spend with your child on a daily basis. I am having difficulty finding a happy medium between playing with her and getting things done around the house. She is content to play on the floor or be carried in a sling while I work, but I also want to know that I am giving her enough stimulation as well. Any opinions?

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Lindsey - posted on 09/14/2009

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there is really no time limit you can set bc every child is so diff...you learn as you go its too bad that kids dont come w/ an instruction book!!! lol The old saying "never wake a sleeping baby" is TOTALLY true and i think it also goes along w/ when a child is happy on the floor or in a seat let them be. you'll hear your pediatrion start talking about "tummy time" and its best to get them used to the floor before 5 to 6 mths old. Sitting on the floor w/ them just laying there talking or playing is great. i have twins so at that age it was really tough to give them attention and fullfill their needs and get stuff done around the house esp when i had an ex that expected house to be clean and supper cooked everynight. You'll figure it out trial and error is the best learning and trying suggestions. but when you can hold and love on her bc she wont want to be held forever and you can never get that back nothing is more important than holding your child when all they want is mommy or if mommy just wants to love on her babies!!!

Nicole - posted on 09/14/2009

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If I have something to do, like wash dishes, I'll sit my 9 month old on the floor in front of the kitchen so we can see each other or in his high chair with a glob of jelly to play in and sing and talk to him while I work. In the 12 hours he's up (well really 10, he naps for about 2 hours during the day), I think he has my total, undivided attention for about 3 hours, not counting the times I'm feeding him (nursing or solids). I obviously pay attention to him the whole day, but I'm only focused solely on him for about 3 hours. I'll sit with him on the floor in the morning before lunch and read or color or something, and in the afternoon we might play on a blanket outside or read, and in the evening we play a little before bath and bed time. The rest of the time he's either playing by himself in his walker or playing on the floor with his toys or out with me running errands. And even when he's playing by himself I still talk to him, ask him what he's doing, etc. They need alone time, my son at that age would get cranky if there was too much going on around him. Just talk to her and tell her what you're doing as you go about your day. Describe colors and shapes, let her hold something similar to what you've got (say a plastic spoon if you're doing dishes). All that is stimulating to them, you don't have to entertain them 24/7, they need to learn to do that themselves.

Cheri - posted on 09/14/2009

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I have to agree with Sara. If she's happy playing by herself than thats ok. Children need to learn to be able to have alone time too or you will open a can of worms. You will begin to raise a needed cling-on. If you want to hold her, than hold her and enjoy because the time will go by so fast too!

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I know how you feel. Sometimes when I'm really busy I feel bad for letting her play by herself even if she's happy. I breastfeed so I'm always cuddling with her when I do that. I spend most of the morning cuddling and playing with her. She usually takes a nap so I will too :). In the afternoon I do let her play on the floor or in her bouncy chair. She's also just starting out in the exersaucer. I guess I don't have an amount of time for you because I really don't know. If she fusses I stop what I'm doing and spend time with her. If she's happy I let her play and do some things then play with her when I'm done. When my husband gets home he likes to play with her. I think as long as she's happy I'll go get things done and try not to feel too bad :)

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