SAHM to schol age children

Brenda - posted on 05/24/2012 ( 9 moms have responded )

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I am a stay at home mom to school age kids. I am home all day, everyday. I am bored out of my mind most days, but where we live, there is not a lot to do and right now, I am in school full time, so going to work isn't an option for me. How do I cope with the boredom, keep myself from feeling dissatisfied in life?

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Jill - posted on 05/27/2012

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Don't take the "home" part of Stay At Home Mom so literally. :-)

I volunteer. I'm in the PTO, which means working on some project or another on a regular basis. I'm also the fundraising chair, which takes hours of work both at home and outside of it. I help my kids' teachers with events and projects.

I read down and saw that you haven't made friends in your new area. If you get involved at the school, you will meet people and make friends that are a similar life stage.

I recently discovered a website for my area that lists community volunteer opportunities in my county. Right now, the local children's museum, public library and parks system needs helpers. There are also listings for things like Meals on Wheels drivers, skilled tradespeople for projects, convention registration helpers. Etc. Google 'volunteers + your city/town name' to see what pops up.

I'm in a walking marathon next week and a 5k in August. For the past two months I've been going on long trail walks once a week with several people that I met through a mutual friend. We talk while we walk and the conversation ranges from silly to deep.

I haven't seen a lot of my friends from college in a couple of years. I started a Facebook event and now we're working on a reunion this summer. That's obviously not 'out of the house' but it sure is interesting.

Brenda - posted on 05/26/2012

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Heather, thank you for your suggestions. I moved here from California a little over a year ago and it is such a small closed off place, I have yet to make friends of any kind, I think that is why I am very bored all the time. My fiance is on the road for 6 months so I am alone with the kids all the time. I am trying to find things I can do myself, for now, until I can make friends. I have tried, but where I live it is so remote, so it is hard to make friends.

Heather - posted on 05/26/2012

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I hear you Brenda...I'm struggling with finding myself right now too. I've been a Mom forever...and I have at least 14 or 15 years to go...

One of my favorite things to do is scrapbooking...the nice thing about the indoor things is that most of them are portable! Take your goodies over to a friends house and do them together! I used to be involved with a 'splurge group' which was a group of twelve ladies who committed to get together once a month, either at someone's house or out on the town, and did something different each time. We drew names to determine who was in charge of organizing the next one, and we had a lot of fun! We went dancing, took a dance class, went for dinners at different restaurants and pubs, did scrapbooking, had a Christmas party with NO kids! It was all a lot of fun, and it became something I really looked forward to each month!

Lisa - posted on 05/26/2012

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I am a SAHM to two under 4. I have also been doing online school. I feel like I am busy all the time, but I know I still need to do things that are just for me or I will go nuts. I have taken up quilting and crafting of all sorts, depending on what looked interested at the time. I would say see if there is something that you would like to start creating. It brings me a great deal of satisfaction to create something. Hope this helps!

Brenda - posted on 05/25/2012

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Squeek_cowgirl, thank you so much. I became a teen mom, at the age of 15. I took care of my little sisters from the age of 9 til I moved out of the house at 15. So I haven't really felt like I have been anything BUT a mom. I don't like coffee, haha, so I have never gone to Starbucks for myself. I get what your saying though. I have to find an outlet. The problem is, the things I enjoy, hobbies I have, they are almost all indoors and done at home.

Squeek_cowgirl - posted on 05/25/2012

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Ask yourself....what are YOU passionate about? What did you do for fun before you became a mom? Horseback ride? Vollleyball? Softball? Would you like gardening? What about writing? If you enjoy cooking, try experimenting with new recipes...there are lots to try on Martha Stewart's website :) Don't forget, just because you are a Mom doesn't mean your whole life has to revolve around your kids! When was the last time you took a good book and hit a Starbucks for a coffee and a comfy chair?

Brenda - posted on 05/25/2012

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Michelle, I am in school online, full time. I have a lot of time on my hands because I tend to get my work done days before it is due.

Kelly, thank you for all your suggestions. I moved here from California a little over a year ago and it is such a small closed off place, I have yet to make friends of any kind, I think that is why I am very bored all the time. My fiance is on the road for 6 months so I am alone with the kids all the time.

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I agree with Michelle--get involved with volunteer opportunities. My son's school is desperate for help--I think they all are.
If volunteering at school is not your thing, find something you are passionate about changing and volunteer in that area. For me, it is homelessness--so I head a program that helps homeless mothers get jobs. We also have an art therapy program which provides therapy for the homeless and works as a great fundraiser when we sell the artwork at a silent auction gala in the spring. Safe Haven also has a program where you can read to children who have no one to read to them. You can also volunteer your services to help the jobless with resumes or tutor adult learners.
What are you studying in school? A lot of charities have programs where you can earn academic credit if you volunteer services in your area of study.

If volunteering is not your thing, perhaps you can make time once or twice a week to have brunch and shop or get a mani/pedi with your girlfriends. I couldn't stay sane without my weekly girls' day. It reminds me that there is more to life than the daily grind and gets me in touch with my feminine, creative side.

You could also do a book club. I love to read, but it gets old when you don't have anyone to discuss the story with. A book club at your local library can offer social interaction and some mental stimulation. If you live in a smaller town, you may have to start it up yourself. i started mine about 4 years ago, and now we are a pretty tight knit little group.

Michelle - posted on 05/24/2012

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If you're in school full time isn't that the same time your children are in school as well? I don't understand how you can be home all day alone but in school full time.



All I can suggest is get involved with your children's school. Volunteer to help with reading and spelling etc. I run the uniform shop at my boys school and am also secretary of the P&C. I help with the fundraising as well. I also have a 2yo and work part time so I actually enjoy when I have a quiet day at home :-)

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