Should I feel guilty for not working and continue to stay at home when my kids go to school?

Michelle - posted on 05/23/2011 ( 49 moms have responded )

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I have been home now for over 5 years. I have a 5 year old and twin 4 year olds. I would love to stay home when my kids go off to school in a couple of years. I think it's important to be home when they get out of school and important to share summers with them. My husband supports me on that, but feels I will be bored. I thought of doing something part-time, but my husband has a very busy job and can work nights, weekends and during the night if something comes up. I often wonder what people will think of me staying home during the day and will ask me what I do? I am new to Circle of Moms and joined to get advice on staying at home when the kids go off to school? I have read pages of being an at-home mom, and most seem to be moms of kids that are not school-aged. Just wondering what people's thoughts are! =)

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Amanda - posted on 05/24/2011

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I have been a stay at home Mom for 13 years. I have 3 kids ages 13, 11, &9. I tried to get a littlie part time job when my youngest went to school but we were all so used to me staying home it was crazy. Laundry and cleaning was all done at night and I felt like I never got to see my kids, my husband finally asked me to stop working and just stay home. He says his life fell apart durning that time. (Husbands of SAHM are so spoiled)
I wanted to be the one to help with homework, pick up the kids and have the house that all the kids came to. That is the parent I am and I enjoy it. Just because your kids are at school there is still things to be done at home. I promise you your day will be full, and your house clean in a way it has not been since you had kids, that is until they come home.
What other people think really doesnt matter as long as you feel that you are doing whats best for your family.

Lisa - posted on 05/27/2011

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Perhaps a morning PT job will give you an outlet. Either in retail or an office job. You can still be present in the PM's. Or take on some at-home job like selling Avon or Mary Kay. Just some ideas. :)

Christine - posted on 05/26/2011

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My mom stayed home with us when we were little. Once we got old enough for school she went back to school herself and ended up as a substitute teacher. You can always say no any time they call you in, so you don't have to worry about not being home when kids are sick. Also you wouldn't have to work summers and could spend that quality time you want with them. So there is an idea! : D

Erin - posted on 05/24/2011

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VOLUNTEER! I work for a non-profit agency and we could not survive without our volunteers! Find an organization in your area that does something you feel passionate about and just go help! We use volunteers for everything from putting out mailings to helping with our daily activities (I work for a free clinic, so lots of professional volunteers), an entering statistics in the computer. There is SOMETHING out there to keep you busy. I work part time while the kids are in school, if you can find a job that fits those hours that is helpful, because you get a lil extra spending money to go play on your days off.

Also, don't worry about what other people think! Do what you feel you need to do, and what makes YOU happy! Your kids will be happier for it, too!

ALSO, I've read that it is MOST important that mom be home during the middle-school years, as that is the time our kids need us most!

Karen - posted on 05/24/2011

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it is society that makes us feel guilty about it. There is nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom no matter how old your kids are. Most full time jobs don't allow you to be home to put them on the bus and get them off the bus. Part time jobs are about the same. You usually end up working while your kids are either getting on or off the bus. You'd always need a sitter to fill in. I say stay at home. Clean the house while they are in school and you can have more time with them when they get home. Pick up a hobby or become a lunch lady. The hrs would work out. You can also volunteer or chaparone on field trips and stuff. My kids are always begging me to go to field trips w/ them cause that's about the only time I can be involved with their school.

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Chantel - posted on 09/24/2012

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I believe you should do what works best for your family. If someone asks what you do proudly tell them you are a Stay at home Mom/Wife. Think of all the opportunities you will have with your children in school. (1) You can be a classroom mother. Having taught for 12 years before I became at SAHM, classroom mothers are a huge help to teachers. (2) You can attend field trips. (3) You can hold office for your PTA chapter. (4) You can volunteer at the school your chidren attend. (5) If you want to work to earn extra money you can be a substitute teacher. Then you are at work when your children are in school, your work day ends when your children's day ends and you can choose the days you want to work. The options are limitless. Do not let anyone define who you are or what it is important to you. If you find that you dont like to be home you can always choose to work. The only thing that is permanent is death and if you are a Christian not even that.

Neva - posted on 09/23/2012

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I think financially if it is possible, by all means stay home. If you "have" to have some type of income, maybe pick up someone's child to watch, or when you pick up your kids from school see if any of the other parents would like you to watch them for a couple hours as well. Charge a little less then if they were in after school care. If you just don't want to, then don't. I worked full time just about my whole sons life, he just turned 13. I really didn't get alot out of it except missing out on alot and his grades were terrible. I have been a "real" staying at home mom a year now, but turned part time a year before that and my son went from failing to getting honors and awards. I didn't help, alot I don't think, but I really thing the comfort of being home when he got home helped alot, We are military, so there isn't alot of stability in our life due to moving alot or husband deploying. So, I think by me being home, he has more stability and feels more confident. The last couple weeks I was looking at working PT again and perfect pay/close and hours were upsetting to him. I would work tues-fri 11-6, I wouldn't be able to pick him up after school for 4-days and he'd have to ride the bus home. That did not set well with him at all. For one he was bullied two years in a row on that bus, and he just wants me to be home. So NO I don't think its bad if you want to stay home once they are in school, Us moms even with ONE child have a lot to keep me busy. And, I do work on the side some thru being a teambeachbody coach, so if you want info email-basegrl67@gmail.com. Best of Luck

Melanie - posted on 09/23/2012

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oh! my and i thought i was the only one going throught this,Am also mother of two,a boy 5yrs age and a girl 2 years old. I have never worked since i i graduatted high school 04,after that i been at home always...army brat..until yr 07 i had my first kid i pretty much stayed home...i'd stay with my mom... and all the yrs goes by i never work but with support of my family i pretty much stayed at home and spended all my time with my lil kid. Until yr 08' i moved out my mom place and i met someone...my boyfriend..we been together and we had a daughter and now am still a Stay home mom. To be honest I LOVe to stay home....

Karla - posted on 08/13/2012

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I'm actually going thru this situation right now. My one & only daughter is starting Kindergarten on Wednesday & I've been wondering what I was going to do while she was at school. We recently moved to a different state, so I stayed home with her this summer to help her adjust & get ready for school. My husband is working nights now & while the extra money would be great, I'm just not sure how I could work and still be here for her. I feel bad about not working, but I'm so happy being available for her. My husband is happy to have me home and is supportive. I'm worried that I'll feel idle though. I think volunteering is a great idea and I'm going to look into what can be done in the area. After reading everyone's comments, I feel much better about my situation. It's wonderful to know that I'm not the only one going thru something like this. The support is very reassuring!

Kelly - posted on 07/22/2011

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I am a mom of two girls, ages 10 and 7. I quit my job 1 year ago after my husband changed jobs and I was able to quit. I LOVE being home! I take them to school each day and pick them up each afternoon. I am available for concerts, programs and field trips. I go to lunch with my girls often and volunteer at both of the girls' schools once each week. I love that I can get all the shopping, cleaning, laundry done during the week so on a weekend we can all relax and have fun. I work hard and don't feel one bit guilty and neither should you!!! My girls are too young to stay at home alone and we would have to pay for after school care or a babysitter anyway so it just doesn't make sense for me to go back to work.

Jane - posted on 07/19/2011

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If your family can afford it, I say go for it. There are plenty of things you can do beyond taking care of the house and family that will keep you from being bored.

I had to retire early to care for my disabled husband, so I was home during elementary school through high school. I was able to volunteer at the kids' schools, get kids to all the extra activities they wanted to do, be a Brownie and Girl Scout leader, and also be a Cub Scout leader, attend all my kids' games, plays, and awards ceremonies, and still get everyone to all of their doctor and dentist appointments.

I also chose to run an online business, but I could have volunteered at any number of local museums or non-profit groups instead. I also helped out the woman who runs the Sunday school, helping her with preparing supplies. I even took a few classes at our local community college in short story writing and stained glass.

To quote the shoe company: Just do it!

Addie - posted on 07/16/2011

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Should you feel guilty? What for? Being a mother and homemaker?



What people are you concerned about? Does their opinion really matter? I doubt it. They probably wish they had the option of staying home when they want to.



Want something to do when the little ones go off to school? Enroll in a telecourse from your local Community College. Study subjects that your children are going to be learning in the upper grades. Then you can help with their homework. Volunteer at their school so they won't go through separation anexity.



When my kids were small I used to go to the school on Friday and read to fifth graders for the last hour of the day. I read Dickens to them along with other authors, and they couldn't get enough. A lot of the children would head to the library to get the book I was reading so they wouldn't have to wait a week to find out what happens next. Some would read along with me. It revolved to where some of the good readers would take over the reading. I did that for three years and it was the second most rewarding thing I have ever done. The first was raising five childen to be productive citizens. That last hour on Friday gave the teacher a must needed break and time to gather her thoughts and papers she had to take home and correct.



Being read to is not just for the little ones. And being a SAHM is a great thing to be. It is your title along with Mrs. When someone asks what you do, tell them, "The hardest job in the world." And leave it at that. If they don't know what that is, then they don't need to know or they don't have any children.

Amy - posted on 07/16/2011

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I am so glad I stumbled on this discussion! My son will be starting Kindergarten this Fall and my daughter following in 2 short years! I've been weighing my options on wether or not to get a part-time job (maybe even substitute teaching) and still haven't made up my mind, but honestly, I want more than anything to be 100% available to my kids for various school activities, homework, field trips, PTO, etc. So I'm not sure how a job would fit in to all that.

Jeanne - posted on 07/14/2011

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I would do what works best for your family. Take stock of your family needs - and how you working (part-time even) would affect them. Could you work when your husband is busy at work? What would happen to the kids? Would you need a babysitter? Who would do the shopping? Cleaning? Take the children to playdates? What if they want to join the summer swim team?

What sort of job/career would you have? Part-time lawyers (oxymoron, really) make more money than part-time librarians but the librarian probably has better work hours for a mom than the lawyer.

It's too facile to say "oh, go get a part-time job when the kids are in school" and be done. It depends. My sister has always worked (her kids are now in college) while one sister-in-law has been always been a SAHM and the other has done WOHM (or work one block away). I've stayed at home and worked full-time and part-time. Part-time gives me flexibility but to be honest, the household was waaay better run when I stayed at home.

Now that my daughter is entering high school, I'm a bit worried. I think the parents have to be more present than ever when the children are older because they can get into REAL trouble. People call me a worrywort (true) but I think it's important to at least think through things. To be honest, I find it hardest to work during the summer months. I hate putting my children into summer camps all summer long. I would like rather they have a relatively schedule-free summer with a few camps specifically for their interests (rather than daycare). That would be the one reason why I quit work.

Lastly, it's okay to make mistakes. If you decide to work and it doesn't work out, then quit and stay at home. If you decide to stay at home and decide it's not for you, figure out what you can do - volunteer, set up a home business using your talents, work for someone else, whatever. The SAHM sister-in-law volunteered teaching English as a second language for several years and now actually (okay, I lied a bit, but one son is grown and the other is in high school) she has a paid position in the same organization.

Bev - posted on 05/27/2011

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Live your life the way you feel is best for your family, never the way other people think you should live it. Remember you only have one chance to raise your children, and before you know it they are off to college. Feel blessed to even have that option.

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 05/27/2011

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Do whatever you want! Why are we pressured now a days to work, expecially when the kids are in school? I know we have ways of 'taking care of the house' that are easier. We don't have to pick berries anymore for the most part, so all of this leaves us with free time. However, there is still lots you can do. Take the time to relax for one, as you've probably been really busy raising your kids. It'd start planning summer parties (like I want to do fruit themes, have like an apple party one month, a strawberry the other) for games and a good get together. Also, you can take the time to revamp the house if you want. There has to be things you want to do for yourself, like shop for a new wardrobe (I hit all the sale racks beginning of summer and my boyfriend is astounded at how many 1$ tank tops I end up with, so it pays to shop around and wander around each store and can be fun). And if you get bored, try to find a part time job you actaully enjoy/want to do. Or one that would be more worth it like waitressing where you'd get tips.

My mom was forced to stay home when she got injured and I was only 4 years old. She became disabled. It was really hard for her because she had always worked 2 jobs. 2! But in the end, she is very grateful to never have missed all those beautiful special moments, easter parties she got to plan, cookie baking and frosting painting she would have been too busy to do. She also says by the time kids hit high school they NEED you home every time they step through the door because of all the crap they are going through. So even if you start working, what if they need you lots in highschool? I wouldn't worry about it. I think it's best to be a stay at home mom and take care of the house and spend the time raising kids - afterall, our morals are out the window in todays society. We as mothers need to step up and raise a better generation than our crappy public schools can

Sriwanti - posted on 05/27/2011

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Just do what u like doing. U dont have to feel guilty if ur husband is able to support the whole family. but if u feel like u wanna get a career go ahead. I'm the same here. We always have maids to do the housework and I take care of my son n cook.. I spend my free time do my hobby: "COOKING" which makes everyone happy with full stomach so i dont feel guilty at all.. :)

Cara - posted on 05/27/2011

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First, taking care of a house is a lot of work! Being a mom is a lot of work. That said, if you are not home schooling, (my biggest reason for not working) then volunteer at the school, or do some work from home.
In my free time (there is not much of it) I write, and am working toward getting published by the end of the summer.
Being home for your kids can make a HUGE difference in their lives :)
My girls are now in their teens and we are very close, and even now they would HATE it if I suddenly started working 40 hours and wasn't there for them.

JAWANDA - posted on 05/27/2011

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my mom was a stay at home mom and she was great! its what your heart tell you to do! you could get a part time job during the time the children are in school, and make sure you are at home when they get off the bus from school or to pick them up from school. i would not worry what others say. if you do that you will end up very confused, because everyone has an opinion, and every opinion just like people are different. listen to your heart

Kelly - posted on 05/27/2011

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Honey, Don't feel guilty. You are being there for your kids. Don't worry about it.You will find things to do while you're at home... Catch up on sleep (coming from a mom of a 5 month old), clean the house, do the shopping, have lunch dates with your friends. My best/favorite option is start couponing... there are a lot of critics out there, but it's a great way to save lots of money, money your hubby works REALLY hard to earn, Especially in this economy, you never know when that income will stop coming in, it's nice to have a stockpile... I started at www.thekrazycouponlady.com good luck

[deleted account]

I think it's great that you're choosing to stay home to be available for your kids and be there when they get home. You could get some training in medical transcription to get a job in that you could do from home. Also a hint, if you search online for freelance jobs instead of work-at-home jobs, here seem to be less scams.

Bonnie - posted on 05/27/2011

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You have to do what is right for you and your family. That is all that matters!

Katie - posted on 05/27/2011

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don't feel guilty at all!! It's important to be there for your kids if you can! I am a stay at home mom, but as you know, that doesn't mean you don't do anything. Stay at home moms are always busy! We figured out that if I were to get a job, I'd be basically working to pay for daycare over the summer (and times during the year when they didn't have school, getting them on and off the bus, etc)...that's not worth it to me. I would much rather be the one to get them on and off the bus, hear about their day, etc. Like today, my youngest is having a picnic at his school that the parents are invited to and because I'm a stay at home mom I get to attend! I have also thought about doing the lunch lady thing...we'll see, but for now I LOVE being a stay at home mom and I'm most definitely never bored!

Toni - posted on 05/26/2011

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Who cares? DS is 6 and going to 1st grade so I am home alone during the day and enjoy it. My MIL and FIL both think I'm selfish for staying home, not to mention a couple friends and a brother that think I'm lazy and selfish too (only bc they can't) but I volunteer at the local Head Start in the mornings, and sometimes the animal shelter. I am available whenever my child needs me. Not to mention the DH too.

Desiree - posted on 05/26/2011

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Who cares what people think of you. Do what's right for your family. If you have your husband's support - that's awesome! There are other things you can do so you won't be bored. Are you involved in a church? Volunteer in the community or your child's school. Find a part time job that will allow you to be home with the kids leave for school and when they come back. The possibilities are endless. KUDOS to you for wanting to be there for your kids!

Deanna - posted on 05/26/2011

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My oldest is 5 and in kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and will be in pre k next year for only 3 hours a day. I have always been a stay at home mom ever since I had my daughter and plan on staying home when my son goes to school full time as well. If you want to continue to be a stay at home mom/wife then that should be fine as long as it doesn't hurt you financially or anything. On the days you get bored or tired of being at home when the kids are in school try some volunteer work or doing something out of the house while the kids are at school for a couple of hours do something around the kids schedule so you can be home when they get home that is what I am planning on doing when my youngest gets into school full time. I can tell you from experience I love being a stay at home mom but there are times I want to go out somewhere and with me not having a work schedule to follow I am able to make my own schedule and hours and have the opportunity to pick up my kid(s) from school. Just because you are a wife and a mom doesn't mean that you have to be in your house all day every day when the kids are at school. My husband and I talked about it while I was pregnant with my daughter and we both agreed that the best solution would be for me to stay home for financial reasons, I love watching my kids grow up and learn new things everyday and while the kids are gone get the things done that need to be done such as house work, running around and stuff like that. Don't feel guilty for staying home when the kids are not there. You are not only a mother but a wife that needs some "Me Time" as well. Good luck with everything enjoy them while you can because they grow up so fast.

Kate - posted on 05/26/2011

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There's always something to keep you busy Michelle! Between keeping a house and home and looking after all the things that come with 3 children of school age I'm sure you won't find too many times when you are wondering what to do with yourself :). Volunteering at school is a great way to keep your social circle open, albeit with other Mums, and have an active involvement with your children's education. I would recommend contacting your children's school, when they get there, and offering your services for helping out on school trips and activities and I think they will probably bite your hand off! Best of luck x

Theresa - posted on 05/26/2011

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Michelle, trust me you will not be bored. If you can afford it, do it. I was a stay at home mom all through my kids school years and i cannot tell you what a difference it has made in their lives. As they got older, I didn't need to be there physically so much, but just being available for whatever they needed and not having to juggle days off and getting permission to, say, go on a field trip, or take them to the doctors when they were sick, was priceless. You will also find that some other kids have moms who work, and you can be the "go to" house for the neighborhood. I always liked that our open door policy with the kids friends built trust with other families, and I always knew where my kids were (at home!). If you feel strongly, make it happen. You can work part time for the school district and get summers off, you can work from home (I do) or other alternatives. Be as creative as you have to and design the lifestyle you want to have. Good luck.

Erica - posted on 05/26/2011

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I say if u can afford to stay home and still be good finically do it! Enjoy your children cause time flys n they get big so fast , I have 3 children 12,7, and one year old n I have to start looking for work now cause we just don't make it :( I would love nothing more than to be home with my little one.

Jessica - posted on 05/26/2011

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First of all I wouldn't worry about anyone's thoughts except for you and your family. It's no one else business!

Second of all I have been a mom for over 12 years now and have been staying home about that same amount of time. I also have many mom friends that have been moms twice as long and we have all come to the same conclusion. Our kids need us more when they are older then when they are younger. My older kids love me going to the school and volunteering in their classes and with events. And let me tell ya sometimes that can be a full time job right there! I get a huge benefit from being that involved in school, the teachers know me well and know they can come to me, I get to know all the kids my kids are in class with and I get to know a lot of the other parents. I think that's all very important.

Ashley - posted on 05/26/2011

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I would not feel guilty at all. You can always get involved with their school when they start. I have been staying home for a few years now. My son has been in school for 2 and now I have a 7 month old but I was staying home way before the baby came along. I don't feel guilty one bit. Staying home is not a money paying job but it is still a job. I say if you and your hubby want it that way than I say screw what everyone else thinks.

Jamie - posted on 05/25/2011

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I still stay at home and my one and only child is almost 6 and is about to finish kindergarten. I wanted to get a part time job for while she was in school but I couldn't find anything that would agree to only give me hours between 8:30 and 2:30 and no weekends. I refuse to pay for childcare. For the first half of the year I volunteered at DD's school. So regularly that I was like a part of the staff. Then we moved and I could no longer walk anywhere ( I don't drive). Now I don't even have the option of getting a job. I hate dealing with people who think I should have a job. Why should I? My husband make enough money to support us, granted we don't have extras but that's why they're extras, not necessities. I use the time DD is in school to do housework, gardening (at least making an attempt), crocheting and reading, that way when DD and DH are home I actually have time to be with them. Plus on school holidays and child sick days I don't have to worry about finding someone to watch DD or argue with a boss to get the day off. Also DH and I are thinking about another child and from my 2 pregnancies (1 miscarriage) I know that we'll probably be pregnant within the 1st 2 months of trying and I don't want to work during my pregnancy. Oh and don't forget how the school meetings are going to increase since you have 2 starting the same year.

Honestly if it works for you then it works for you. Who cares what someone else thinks. It's just like co-sleeping, baby wearing or breastfeeding. If it works for you and your family then do it.

[deleted account]

Who cares what other people think? Do whatever is best for your family. If that is getting a part time job during their school hours... do that. If it is not getting a job and just taking care of the house, yourself, and volunteering w/ your kids school.... do that. If it's some other combination of something that I didn't mention.... do that. Only you and your husband should be involved in the discussion of what is best for your family. No one else's opinion should matter.

Kim - posted on 05/25/2011

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I was just thinking about this myself. I've been a stay at home Mom for 12 yrs now even though my oldest isn't even 11.5 yet. I worked at a school and didn't go back after the summer. But I was thinking of going back to work once my youngest started Kindergarten but then I was thinking of the little plays and things at school I'd miss, that I went to with the other 2 so I am going to delay going back to work for a bit. Once they get further in school there aren't as many things to attend so that is when I'll start working again. I'm a teacher and I love working in Preschool so that is where I'll go which is generally part time 8 or 9am til 1pm or so, then I can be home with the kids afterschool. And generally they are good about being home with sick kids. I may see about subbing once my youngest is in K, I hate it but I'd be able to say no if there is something going on and I can help us start saving some money again and maybe go on a real vacation. I'd say if you can afford it stay home, take up some hobbies. Once they are in school there is a lot going on too, their sports, hobbies, HW. There is no down time from time to start dinner until they go to bed. Oh and because my days aren't busy enough I just volunteered to be the Brownie leader for next year, with out a helper yet!

Lu - posted on 05/25/2011

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I also have been home for 5 years (almost 6 actually) and have a 7, 5 and 2 year olds. I have been looking forward to going back to school and work as soon as the little one is in school because I miss working and I think I would get extremely bored at home alone all day. Also, we would like to be able to afford nicer things since we have been fairly tight with only one income. But that's only me! If you are fairly comfortable with one income and you think being home will be best for your family and for you, it is really no one's business. You can always volunteer at your kids schools, keep busy around the house and in your community, and have some much needed me time. I say go for it and don't listen to what others might say!

Stacy - posted on 05/25/2011

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Once your kids are in school, that is YOUR time to relax and do what you want while they are there. I wouldn't feel guilty at all. You'll still be working keeping up with housework and your yard if you have one.

Tracy - posted on 05/25/2011

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Michelle, I have 2 kids (7 and 8yrs old) who are both in school. I'm still a SAHM and am loving it!! It's important to me to be home for all the reasons you listed above. I love being able to create memories with my kids after school, on school vacations and during the summer. If your husband supports your decision to stay home, then by all means, take advantage of it. As for staying busy....I'd say volunteering is your best bet. Maybe even substitute teach in your school system if you can. With volunteering, noone is going to complain if you have to leave when your child gets ill or you have appt.s to take your kids to. I used to volunteer at a riding stable, helping with chores, working the horses etc. I now have my own horse and work with him. There are many things to do to stay active and keep away boredom, you just have to investigate the options in your area. :-)

Stifler's - posted on 05/25/2011

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Who really cares, you have your reasons and I totally get them with the hubby working random hours and stuff.

LovinLifeAsMommynWife - posted on 05/24/2011

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I don't think you should feel bad at all. You can always volunteer, join the car pool, join the PTA, and other activities while your children are in school. I don't think people realize that being a SAHM IS a job. My kids are still in their toddler/pre school years so I'm not exactly where you are just yet, but I feel the same way you do. I feel that it's important to be here for my Children when they get home from school mostly because I missed having my Mom around when I got home from school. I'm sure you will be so busy once they start school, that you won't believe how quickly time flies.

Best Wishes!
www.LovingLifeasMommyandWife.com

Rachel - posted on 05/24/2011

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Your work in the home extends beyond your children. Most certainly, they are the most important, but not the only responsibilities. You are a home-maker. You make a safe and inviting place for your children and husband. That won't stop when your kids go to school.
I would recommend taking up a hobby of some sort. Something you can do while you are home alone, but something that can be stopped if you are needed for something else.
You are doing awesome! If someone else has a problem with you, or your family... that's THEIR problem. Do what is right for your family.

Michelle - posted on 05/24/2011

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You have no reason to feel guilty. You're not likely to find a job that will allow you to be home when your kids are out of school and there's still plenty to do around the house. You can just do it without little tornadoes following you around and undoing your work. Your kids still need you and really there will be days when they are sick etc. You're not done raising your kids when they turn 5. I think these days they probably need your involvement and guidance more then ever. Don't feel guilty. I doubt if your husband has time for you to work either. If you work he'll have to be more available for kids etc to cover for when you're not there. If you're bored then volunteer as suggested by numerous people. I'm pretty sure you'll just find that you actually have time to get stuff done for once.

Candi - posted on 05/24/2011

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My son is in middle school and my daugher will be next year. Its fun to chaperone those field trips.....your children don't want you there, but they won't dare act up. And you can embarrass them!! lol. I go on every field trip I can. Its so wonderful to be able to support your children and be there for events at school

Candi - posted on 05/24/2011

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Another thing to think about, what if the school calls you b/c your child is sick, Will you be able to leave work to go get him? Some jobs won't allow that. I love volunteering. I have freedom, gaining experience, and it gets me out of the house.

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I am still a sahm and my only son is 6yrs and in school full time. I don't feel guilty at all, even though he is at school 6 hours a day, I still contribute a lot to his life by being available.

I get all of my chores, shopping, and "me-time" in while he is at school, which leaves the afternoons and weekends completely open for us to spend as a family on meaningful activities, as opposed to shopping, chores, etc.

I also volunteer in the publishing center one day a week, SEEDS (reading) one morning a week, work on the fundraising committee, which helps to keep his school well funded and at the top of our state's performance, and I donate artwork and time to various youth charities outside of my son's realm, just for myself.

I also get to be there for all of my son's plays, recitals, sporting events, awards ceremonies, field trips, and spirit days at school.

I love that I am home with him right after school, and that I do not have to struggle to find something to send him to all summer--he gets more free play time, which has been proven beneficial to creative development in children.

Do not feel guilty. Really, there is very little in terms of productive work you can get done during the 6 hours your child is away at school. By the time you drop them and get to work, take out time for lunch, and leave in time to pick them up, you only get about 4 hours of work time. Not to mention the time you give up with them when they are at home because you have to spend it on mundane house care stuff. It is different than doing those chores while you are with them when they are little because there is still tons of time to just play with them, but you would be surprised how little time is left for just playing and spending time together after school and sports and such.

LauraBeth - posted on 05/24/2011

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I dont think you will be bored, are you crafty you could make thing and sell them on etsy and ebay, maybe? My hubby is in the Army. I do volunteer with the FGR and sending packages overseas to troops. since you are a MA maybe you could work as the school nurse? I think you have to be a LPN but maybe not.

Michelle - posted on 05/24/2011

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Thanks Candi. I actually may consider being a lunch lady. I remember the jokes in school, but when it comes to your kids, you will do anything. Hours are always tuff and to find a part-time job that isn't in the school system is tuff. I can't quit jobs every summer. We couldn't afford daycare and camps every week. I will just have to see what comes in the next year. So from what I am hearing, I won't be bored =)

Candi - posted on 05/23/2011

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All 3 of my kids are school aged. I volunteer b/c with my kids' school schedules, nobody would give me the hours I would need. My husband works from 1pm til 1am, so I am the one my kids depend on most. All of their after school activities fall on me. My husband is in the military, so we don't live near family to help out when needed. I enjoy being the primary care taker so I can be involved. I volunteer at their schools, sit on 2 PTAs, Boy Scout leader, dance mom, and I volunteer at the museum. Sometimes I feel guilty, but my daughters get out of school every Wednesday at 1:00 and I could never work past 3:30. Its just easier not to stress myself over job hunting. Of course you could always be a sub. Subs are needed everywhere and you would have the same hours your kids have, Just an option. Good luck

Michelle - posted on 05/23/2011

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My husband suggested volunteering. I honestly have to say it's mostly my guilt. I want what's best for my children. I would love suggestions of something I could do from home to generate some income? I have a BA in business and an associates as a medical assistant. Sounds like your husband travels a lot? For you, working would be tuff anyway. I saw someone post that they want to be the first person their child sees when they come home, to tell them about something exciting they saw or heard at school. Not to have them forget because it was 2 hours until they saw mom or dad or because everyone was rushing around after work to make dinner, do homework or baths. So true!

LauraBeth - posted on 05/23/2011

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My kiddos are still very young, but I plan to be involed with the school when they start, I also love to sew so maybe I will pick that back up as well, I also plan to finish my degree once they are inschool as well (not that I will use it, but it is good to have incase something happens with my hubbys job) . I dont think I will be bored but my hubby and I both want me to be home while the kids are in school, we think that it is very important to have me at home so the kiddos have that stablity when my hubby goes overseas or to training schools

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