Should my newborn sleep in my bedroom or in his nursery?

Louise - posted on 08/01/2011

As a mom with 3 boys I have loads of experience with this area. When I had my kids I put them in the cot in my room until they were 9 months old. i suggest that you don't leave them sleep in your room for more than 9 months as they get clever and don't want to stay in their own room. As long as you have monitors they will be fine in their own room at that age. If you invest in a cot bed it will be really useful when they get older and have outgrown the moses basket as you can put them in the cot bed and you will have the piece of mine of the bars on the cot so they wont fall out. And then when they are older again you can change it into a toddler bed.

Luschka - posted on 07/22/2010

Also you'll get way more sleep with your baby next to you than if you have to keep walking to another room!

Luschka - posted on 07/22/2010

Everyone will have an answer based on their own experience, so you have to decide for yourself. For me it was just a matter of a few questions. My baby was used to the sound of my heartbeat, she was used to the warmth and comfort of being near me and she was unaccustomed to being alone. If I put her in her own room as a newborn, she would be alone, in the dark, away from my smell and sound and I think it would be terrifying. All mammals keep their babies with them initially, until they are ready to leave... that's what we're doing with our little girl.

Meghan - posted on 07/22/2010

its what u feel comfortable with. i suggest in the room with u till at least they sleep all thru the night cuz at nighttime feedings its so much easier to just reach over and grab ur baby without getting up. my daughter is 1 and still is in our room only because we are in a 1 bd apartment and the lease is up in january. but with our daughter thats due in dec we are having to look for a bigger place so my 1 year old can have her own room.

Amy - posted on 07/22/2010

Both of mine slept in our room either in a bassinet or the pack and play at the foot of our bed for about 3 months. It makes the first few months easier on you with having to get up every couple hrs for feedings. I had two c-sections so it was a god sent to have them in there while I was recovering. But in the long run it is your decision and you will know what is right for you and the baby. Good luck!!

Jessie - posted on 07/22/2010

My daughter whom was born Jan 12th 2010 has always slept in her crib in her room. The only time that we put her in the room with us was when I was babysitting for a friend for a week. They slept in my daughters room. But other than that she is in her own room.

Bridget - posted on 07/22/2010

It's just my opinion, but I think you should put your new baby in his/her own room the first night home. I had trouble sleeping with my daughter in the room. I could hear every little grunt and breath and I would have to go check on her 1,000 time a night. Your baby monitor will pick up the sounds that you really need to hear and you can sleep through the rest of them.
Also you should know that later on we made the mistake of letting our daughter sleep in our bed and she still sleeps in our bed. (She's almost two.) If you let your child get into that habit it will be a nightmare to break.

Leah - posted on 07/22/2010

I didn't plan this, but when my son (now 8 months old) came home from the hospital, he ended up sleeping in bed with us. It was just a heck of alot easier because I was nursing him and I was actually able to get some sleep because I would just pop him on and go back to sleep. We did this until he was 5 months old. As soon as we put him in his own room he started sleeping through the night. I would recommend, even if you don't co-sleep, you keep the baby in the same room. You'll find it easier for those late night feedings! Good luck!

Lisa - posted on 07/22/2010

i always think, its best in your room for a bit until u get into a routine and go with the flow of the child you tend to know when the times right for a move.

Dawn - posted on 07/22/2010

My son was in my husbands and I's room till he was 3 months old. As soon as he would sleep through the night he was in his own room. It was easier to get up wit him when he was in our room the first 3 months. But you have to do what you are comfortable with.

Allison - posted on 07/22/2010

Ultimately it's completely up to you - what feels right for you and your family, and what your baby prefers. But biologically speaking, babies should sleep next to their mothers. There they have ample access to milk, mother's breathing helps them regulate their own, mother is right there in case something does happen, she can respond immediately. People seem to forget that we are mammals and we have instincts like any other mammal. Keeping your baby close to you, even while sleeping, is extremely important. More info here: Mother-Baby Behavioral Sleep Lab http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/

I coslept with all 3 of my children and I wouldn't trade that time for the world. So what if they're still in your bed when they 3 or 4? In the grand scheme of things, 3 or 4 years is a drop in the bucket, and I would much rather have my child feel secure and respected in making the decision to sleep alone when he was ready.

Rehab - posted on 07/22/2010

i would say keep him next to you in bed, i think it's harsh to leave a new born child in next room, even if u have monitors, i would say keep him close to u in ur bed so that both u and his father get use to his presence and he can feel secure recognizing ur smell and daddy's voice. congratulations

Natasha - posted on 07/22/2010

My son slept in a bassinet next to the bed for the first 4 months. I'm breastfeeding so it was easier to have him close. At 4 months he started sleeping through the night so that's when we moved him to the crib in his room. He sleeps great and actually doesn't like sleeping in bed with us. He is 8 months now and usually sleeps on his belly so he likes his own space. Personally, I sleep a lot better when he is not in the bed because their isn't any worrying about rolling on him on him getting caught in the covers. Do whatever feels right. You'll know when your baby is ready.

Ashley - posted on 07/21/2010

i used the bassinette in my room just the first month with both my kids ... its depends weather your breast feeding or bottle feeding and more comfortable for you ... after a month my kids went in to their rooms and they do great sleping through the night with a steady routine both slept great

Christi - posted on 07/21/2010

my son slept with us because he was a premie and had trouble keeping his formula down. he would spit up and choke on it. we tried three different types of wedges, keeping him on his side, swaddling,ect. and nothing would work. we have a king size bed so after many nights of being too scared to sleep we started letting him bunk with us. he slept with us until his first birthday and he now sleeps on his own in his converted crib!

Sarah - posted on 07/21/2010

here in new zealand they recommend having your child sleep in your room for the first 6 months it just depends on you and your child though I think you will find youd rather have them sleep in your room for the first little while it is alot easier having the bassinet right next to the bed depending on how many times a night baby gets up i found it easier though :)

Lacye - posted on 07/21/2010

my daughter Lily is 13 months old and she still sleeps in the same room with me. but she sleeps in her play pen, we don't have enough money for a real crib so she always used her play pen which had a bassinet on it. i wouldn't suggest cosleeping. it starts up a really bad habit that is hard to break. but if you feel more comfortable with her sleeping with you then do it. Lily did end up sleeping with us for a little while but that was mostly because we had a really cold winter and the house was really cold. but when we moved to the apartment we are in now she started back sleeping by herself again.

Donna - posted on 07/21/2010

My midwife and health visitor told me to keep baby in my room till he is six months. You may find baby will sleep better in a moses basket for the first 1-2 months then move on to the cot.

Frankie - posted on 07/21/2010

I know the temptation of sleeping with your new baby, but coming from my experience as a mother of three, sleeping in the crib is more beneficial to you and your baby. And trust me even if your baby loves his/her crib they will still try to come to your room later on. You have to put your foot down with them or your relationship with your husband and you standing as a person with control will slip away. I don't want to feel upset or mean for putting your baby in their crib right away. I let my older two children sleep with me until they were 2. I had the hardest time transitioning them to their own bed. Lots of lost sleep. My youngest daughter was different. I decided to just put her into her crib after the first week home. It was heart wrenching for me. I stood outside her room trying to listen. I slept with the baby monitor on my pillow. I did it all! But she was perfectly happy. And so was I after a couple of days. And so was daddy after the healing process was over! Trust me! In their own crib, at least after the first week or two, is the trick to getting that much needed sleep, marital relationship quotas met, and setting your child up for a healthy dose of independence for the both of you.

Mandalynn - posted on 07/21/2010

I let both my kids sleep in my bedroom in their bassinets for the first month.. You will know when you are ready to put them in their own room.. My first, my now 4 year old son took alittle less time then my daughter thats now 7 months... Once you get use to its little sounds youll know...

Charlotte - posted on 07/21/2010

My 3 all slept in their own room from day 1 and I think it's important as your bedroom should remain (as far as possible) a haven of peace for you and your man. Believe me, you are going to need a little "adult space" when the little cherub comes along! Also all the mothers I know who slept in the same room as their newborns had a lot of trouble getting getting their babies or children to sleep in their own rooms. And as you say the 2 rooms are next to each other so not far to go for night-feeds! Good luck!

Lea - posted on 07/21/2010

AAP recommends moving the crib out of your bedroom at about 6 months old. I would do it when the baby isn't waking up very much during the night. Newborns usually require a ton of care during the night. I mean, they are used to being inside their mother, so they freak out if they sense you aren't there...

Leanna - posted on 07/20/2010

I'll be honest, as a first time mom (& a single mom b/c my husband abandoned us when I was 4mon preg) who breastfed for the first 6 weeks (till I had to go back on some necessary meds) it's so much easier, when you're already exhausted, to let your newborn sleep in the bassinette right next to your bed. That way you don't have to travel to get him. Just make sure you have all your tools, nursing or bottle-feeding, right there next to the bed too. then you can feed, & lay him right back down in the bassinette (easier than pack n play cuz it's usually even with the height of the bed) & you can roll back over to go back to sleep till the next feed. My little one is 6wks old now & we're just now getting a good night routine down & that's what's worked best for me. But everyone has something different that works for them & their baby. You'll develope your own routine & what works for you too. I wish you the best! Happy delivery!

Alyssa - posted on 07/20/2010

I let my son sleep in his bassinet next to my bed for 2 months then off to his bed he went, but I had a C Section and it was painful to get up and walk in there every 4 hours. My boyfriend did help out very much at that time.

Malinda - posted on 07/20/2010

i let my son sleep in a bassenet for about 2 months then his room! if not ur child will be spoiled to your room~!

Stephanie - posted on 07/20/2010

I think that this is one of the hardest things to plan for! I never thought that I would have my child co-sleep with me (we had the bassinet all set up next to the bed for the first few months or so) but I found it so much easier to have my son co-sleep with us. I also breastfed, so that might be somewhat of a deciding factor as well since you will be the one mostly up in the middle of the night. After about three months he moved into the crib (that was at the time set up in our room) and was in our room in his crib/in our bed until he was about one. The transition to his own room was rough at first (him often magically in our bed in the middle of the night) but then one day he just accepted sleeping in his bed in his room and wouldn't have it any other way. So in truth...have a plan in mind and then be prepared for anything....With this next child (due in December) I plan to co-sleep at first and hopefully transition into her own room a little faster than my son to maybe make it an easier transition, but we'll see what happens!!

Chinyendu - posted on 07/20/2010

If you are ready to walk from your room to your baby's, then let the baby sleep in the room. But if you not ready then you might want to allow your baby share your room. What you must know is that, your baby will not share your room forever.

My 21/2 year old slept with my hubby and until she was more than 1 year old before I gradually and consistently moved her to her room, although she comes to sleep with us when she wakes up at midnight, I make sure I put her back in her room when she has slept off again.

Always, say it is bed time to your baby when it is time to go to sleep. He or she will get used to it and will help you do the things you do before bed time, like turning off the light and TV.

Best of luck in any decision you make.

Angela - posted on 07/20/2010

I like the fact of having them in the parents room, it is much easier for you for midnight feedings...however this also depends on whether or not your husband is a light or heavy sleeper...again my youngest son (I have 3) was moved out of our room just after 3 months....Best advice I can give you, put them down when they are still awake so they learn how to put themselves to sleep....

Rachael - posted on 07/20/2010

Depends on you. My daughter sleeps in my bed. She is almost 8 months now. It works best because I breastfeed. I wouldn't want to have to get up out of bed and wake all the way up just to get her when she cries at night. She gets nightmares. I just roll over and feed her without waking up all the way. works great. I have a bed rail on one side and my husband on the other. But we are thinking that when I stop nursing we will put her in her own room.
My mom had all her children in bed with her initially. It seems to work best especially if you breastfeed. Much more convenient and natural, otherwise it is just more work and an unhappy baby.

Karyn - posted on 07/20/2010

with all three of my children they start off in the room with us you have got to remember bub has been with you for the last nine months being born is a big change trust better for them to keep them with you and your husband for first 3-6 months depends on how bubs settles in when born then move them to own room

Kerrie - posted on 07/20/2010

We are currently co-sleeping with our 1 month old and we co-slept with our son until he was 16 months old. Its basically whatever your comfortable with. Not everyone wants to have their baby in their room. Or in their bed like we do. But I must admit I find it extremely convenient in the middle of the night having the baby right there. Im breast feeding so all I have to do when she wakes up is roll over and stick a boob in her mouth and she goes right back to sleep. Where as if she were in another room. By the time you really hear the baby the kid is wide awake and crying and then you have to get out of bed get to the bedroom. Feed and change the baby (who's wide awake by this point). And hope that you can get the baby back to sleep. Personally I would rather have my child in the room anyday. But like I said, it all depends what your confortable with. There certainly is no harm in doing it either way. its just a personal choice.

Aprill - posted on 07/20/2010

I have a 10 month old who has slept in my bed with me every single night of his life! This is not actually what I had planned on when I was pregnant. His first night home, he cried everytime I put him down in his bassinet which was right next to the bed. He ended up outgrowing the weight limit before he ever even got to sleep in it!!! Since I was/still am breastfeeding, I realized that since he woke up to feed about every 2 hours (this obviously changes with time) that it was easier for him to sleep in bed with me. It seemed much easier for both me and him to fall back asleep since I could tell when he woke up before he could even get a chance to cry. I read in a book called "The Baby Book" by Dr. Sears that when an infant who sleeps in a crib, wakes for a feeding at night, tends to need to be rocked back to sleep, which creates a bigger disruption. Alot of disruptions in their sleep can create poor sleeping habits. My son prefers to fall asleep on the breast and it definetly seems to benefit both mine and his ability to get a good nights sleep. He still sleeps with me now because he still wakes up once a night to feed between 2 and 3 am. And also because in the summer his room gets very hot and mine is air-conditioned. My pediatrician says that you can expect a child to still wake for a feeding once a night till about 12 months. Since he will be a year in September and the temperature will be more moderate, that is when I plan to ween him from the breast and my bed. When your bundle of joy arrives, it might be easier to decide based off of your baby's individual cues.

Aura - posted on 07/20/2010

Without reading the other posts, my advice is this:
Look it up. That is what I did. I researched every ounce of data I could locate so that I could make an educated decision. The material I found stated the your baby should sleep in your room for at least six months to lessen the chance of SIDS. There is still a chance of SIDS up until one year of age, but it is completely your choice as this is a minor chance. Personally, I co-sleep and it has been wonderful for my family.

Do what you feel is right and trust your instincts.

Alicia - posted on 07/20/2010

our room and my daughters are right next door. she was born last august, my husband was deployed so i made the decision. for the first 3 months she slept in a graco travel lite pac and play right next to our bed. when she started only waking 1 or 2 times is when i moved her to her own room. but i kept her in the same pack and play for another month or so that way she wasnt in a new room and new bed. now shes in her crib sleeps 12-14 hours a night, and we still use the baby monitor in our room. haha. hope this helps.

Amanda - posted on 07/20/2010

I think you should make that decision when the baby comes and you can decide what works best for you. Our son slept in the bassinet in our room and occasionally in our bed until he was 4 months old. When we moved him to his own room I had a couple nights that I didn't sleep well because I was afraid I would't hear him even with the monitors. It only took a couple nights to get over that and than we all slept better in our own spaces.

Lindsey - posted on 07/19/2010

Hi there and congratulations! I am a mother of 2, 6mo old and 3 yr old. I would strongly recommend co-sleeping with your new baby, it was the best decision we made. I was alittle apprehensive at first because I had researched so much information on SIDS and how to help prevent it. At the time, co-sleeping wasn't recommended because there is a risk of rolling onto the baby or he/she being smuthered by bedding. That still holds true so if you chose to co-sleep, be sure to use a co-sleeping product or even a positioner. You may find yourself sacrificing blankets, lol. More recent research proves that co-sleeping actually helps reduce the risks of SIDS, that if the baby is sleeping in the same room as their Mom, if they stop breathing they will subconsciously hear their Mother breathing in their sleep and *remember* to breathe again. If you chose to keep them in a bassinet, that is great too (especially for those night time feedings). There is no pre-determined age to chose to put them into the nursery, you decide when you feel comfortable doing so. My opinion, I wouldn't wait too long after 5-6 mo of age because they have begun developing a good memory bank. They recognize sights, sounds, smells, ect.. and it may be harder on you both to make the transition. Good luck on your decision-making and bottom line... do what feels right for you and your husband.

Melanie - posted on 07/19/2010

Kylah slept in our room in her cradle for two months then off to her room and new cot and that was only because i wanted her to be small again. She looked tiny again in her big bed. We moved Chloe into her room at 4 months still in her cradle at 6mths in the cot. The girls never slept in our bed and that is a decision we made right from the start. At 20mths they were in a king single bed and it was great, in the morning they climb into bed with you and snuggle in and we'll watch TV together. Chloe is 2.5yrs and i still have the baby monitor on just for safety. Our bedrooms are quite a distance away. Enjoy every second of you new baby, they grow to quick. All the very best you'll love it xoxo

Kris - posted on 07/19/2010

Congrats on your little one! I suppose that goes by the size of your bedroom. Our bedroom is too small for a pack n' play/bassinet so our son had to sleep in his own crib when we arrived home from the hospital. We also live in a small house so a baby monitor was not needed for us. I am able to hear him from any room in the house including the basement.

Schmoopy - posted on 07/19/2010

It's up to you, of course, but I think it's easier to have your baby in your room at first. They wake up so frequently, you'll be walking back and forth constantly! Once your baby starts to sleep for longer stints and you feel more secure in your routine and your baby's strength and stability, you can transition to the nursery.

Chelsey - posted on 07/19/2010

With both my daughters the only time they have ever slept in the same room as me was in the hospital - 1 night each. When we got home they had their own rooms. i couldn't sleep with them in the room because I would hear every little noise. Having them in their own beds in their own rooms made for a much happier mommy, but do whatever feels comfortable for you :)

Ashley - posted on 07/19/2010

I found with both of my babies that they didn't like the hardness and wide feeling of the crib no matter how tightly i wrapped up those blankets. Both went into a bedside bassinet(oversized one) until 4 months, and my daughter slept with me most nights or else she wouldn't have slept, she was stubborn more so than my first.
I think the size of the bassinet and there is someone else in the room made it easier for them to sleep. I found too that when we did transition to crib in another room, that it was around 4-5 months starting with a nap here and there, letting him/her go in a couple times a day awake so they can check out their surroundings was necessary for my guys too, and then finally night sleeping. Every baby is different though.
GOOD LUCK and congratulations!

Laura - posted on 07/19/2010

My son slept in his bassinet next to me for 3 months. Then we moved him to his crib. He slept really well at night but he was such a loud sleeper that I didn't sleep from all his grunting and cooing in his sleep, haha. He didn't even notice the difference of bassinet to crib because he was so young. I liked having him in our room at the beginning though because he was born with sleep apnea. So by the time he came home with us I was paranoid that he would stop breathing in his sleep for that first couple months.

Bryce - posted on 07/18/2010

I Am pregnant with my first child as well , and she is due in September. I have been told by many people that i should be keeping my baby in her bassinet for the first 6 months when she is born. I think this would be a good idea because then you have your child closer to you. Much safer then having your baby in another room.

CARRIE - posted on 07/18/2010

You are the only one that can decide what is right for you. I had things all planned out while I was pregnant. Then my son was born and all those plans went right out the window....lol! I have found that you should keep an open mind and when the time comes you should do what feels right for you and your family.

I wanted to keep my son in our room in a cradle at least until he was 3 months and then move him to his crib in his own room. He ended up in one of those co-sleepers that sits on the bed for the first 2 months then I tried to move him to his cradle but, he didn't sleep for 3 nights. Which means I didn't sleep for three nights. The fourth night I was so tired I put him in bed with me and he slept for 6 hours straight. After a week he was sleeping at least 8 hours straight and has slept through the night ever since. I am now a huge fan of co-sleeping. I enjoy having him close and all that extra cuddle time. They grow way too fast and before you know it you can barely get a hug out of them so I will cherish all this extra time with my baby. There isn't one perfect answer for everyone. Just relax, enjoy your kids, and follow your heart when things come up.

Caitlin - posted on 07/18/2010

I am also a first time mom, my daughter is almost 10 months now. She still sleeps in our bed, We have tryed many times moving her to her own crib but she will scream litterally until we come and get her. She falls alseep nursing then I lay her in her crib and she sleeps in her own crib for a couple hours then wakes up realizes where she is at and freaks out. I would honestly suggest to put the baby in her crib from the get go, that way you don't have to transition from bassinet to crib. The baby will be used to it's own room and surrondings.

Carisa - posted on 07/18/2010

I put both my girls in a crib in their room from night one. There were a few days when I would take them downstairs and we would sleep together on the couch, but I never took them into our room. It really depends on how you feel about letting them cry. If it really bugs you, having the baby in your room makes the most sense.

Angelique - posted on 07/18/2010

We originally thought that we would put our little one (also our first) straight in her nursery... But then found out that being in her own crib (or in our case Moses basket) in your room helps her to regulate her breathing and may help prevent cot death. We took so long in trying to have her... We didn't want to take any chances. They say the little one should stay in your room for the first 6 months. At the moment Teagan only wakes twice a night (once at 1:30 and again at 4:30 for her bottle) and this doesn't disturb my husband who is still getting up for work. So for us this is working out.

Good luck.

Amy - posted on 07/18/2010

definitely perks to having your child in your room if you are able to breastfeed (or want to). We were waiting on a bassinet from my friend and went into labor early (her son was still using it as he would not sleep in his crib!) and she slept in the bed with us for the first month maybe? I was against it, but she would NOT sleep in her crib that early. Once we got the bassinet she was fine. But I also was up a LOT checking her breathing. Once she started trying to roll I put her in her crib and she started sleeping more soundly, that was about 2 months ago (she is 5 months now). I don't think it's necessary to co-sleep for any certain period of time, it's really what works best for you and your baby. I've been lucky that mine adapted to the crib so well! (it was easier on her and me than daddy) I still check on her a couple times at night but really it's hard to plan these things, they will tell you what they want to do! Just try to keep them out of the bed with you that can be a hard habit to break! plus it increases the chance of SIDS. Good luck with your labor and delivery!!!

Sarah - posted on 07/18/2010

I think it's just easier to keep the baby in your room for this first month or so. Only because he(?) will be waking up every 1-3 hours to eat and going back and forth from your room to the baby's could get very tiring and tedious. When the baby gets older I'm sure moving him to his own room would be perfectly fine.

I'm saying this, but I feel somewhat hypocritical lol. My husband's 3,000 miles away in linguistics school for the Navy. My 5 month old son and I are living with my parents because I recently had a very severe shoulder injury and I need constant help until I can find someone who can help me. Aaanyway, I'm living in their 3 bedroom apartment with my little sister, little brother, older brother, my parents and 2 cats. My little sister, son , and I all share a big room...

Wow, sounds depressing when I write it out like that lol. But anyway, my point is that I haven't been able to 'practice what I preach', but that's what I'm planning on doing when he finally GETS to have his own room.

And hey, if either or doesn't end up working, you have options!

Ever need any advice, help, or just want to talk, let me know!

Lizelle - posted on 07/18/2010

I breastfed and simply found it easier to have my kids pack n play in our room at least until they sleep through most of the night. I moved my son out when I realised we started bothering him, which was around 6/7 months. My daughter moved out when she was only 3 months old. Simply because my eldest also wanted to sleep in our room, while she was their and with 4 of us in the room, nobody seemed to be getting a good nights sleep any more.

Do what feels right for you and that would best for you.