Sleeping Problems with my 20 month old

Amanda - posted on 08/17/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I am in need of any advice you all can offer. I have a 3yr old and a 20 month old, and here lately the 20 month old with not sleep for anything unless she is being held by either my husband or myself ( and this cannot be done in a bed, must be on the couch, chair, etc.) and then once she does go to sleep she screams unless she is laid down in our bed, on the few nights we got her laid down in her own bed she would scream if she woke up. I'm really at a loss here, I have no clue what to do. She was in a crib and wouldnt sleep there, told us she was scared, so we tried letting her sleep with her big sister, which worked for awhile but not anymore, then we tried transitioning her crib to a toddler bed and that also hasnt worked. She is now doing this at naptime also, I have to lay down with her on the couch, which means I am getting nothing done, my 3 yr old ends up usually watching cartoons for that 2 hrs ( which I hate) and then by the time I can get up I am angry and aggitated because nothing is done. Neither my husband or I has been able to sleep peacefully and I just dont know what to do....this came out of nowhere, she has been an excellent sleeper since birth, throught the night from a month old, and then this started....PLEASE HELP!!!!!!

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Amanda - posted on 08/17/2010

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Thank you so much for the tips! We pray and read our Bible every night, but I never thought to find a way for it to be more interactive for her (such as the waving) I love that idea!! We spend very little time in their bedroom during the day, so maybe it is kinda like a foreign territory kind of thing when we go to put her in bed. I hadnt even thought of any of the tips, so thank you very much for the help....I love the cuddle time with her, but its getting hard for my husband to get sleep and get up for work...so the choice is either figure something out or he moves to the couch, so thank you again!!

Nancy - posted on 08/17/2010

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I don't know how much help I might be, but I have a few suggestions you might TRY. First of all, you said she is scared in her bed. Try spending time in her room with her during the day, playing with her toys, reading, etc. Then make her bedtime routine in her room very relaxing - read, rock, etc. You may also try patting her while she is in her crib so she knows you are there with her while she is falling asleep, tell her night night time or whatever, tell her how much you love her, and Mommy and Daddy are right down the hall, we can hear you if you need us, we will be right here. Do you say prayers with her before bed? Strange, but my daughter (16 months) has been looking up to the ceiling and waving, so we tell her to say night night to her guardian angel (ok, a little goosebumps, but I don't think it's scary to them). With our 3 1/2 yr old, after his prayers, he says, "I Love you God, I love you Jesus, night night". And remind her that God and Jesus are there with her to keep her safe. Try a stuffed animal she likes, tell her "Clifford will be here by your bed all night". The only thing I can see is maybe she had a bad dream she associates with her room, and now you have to get her back happy with her room. Or try putting her bed in your room for awhile if you can.
Also, I heard somewhere that we should reverse the monitor situation. You know, we have the monitor so WE can HEAR the BABY. But the baby feels left alone, so maybe if you put a monitor so that she can hear you ????
Try some calming music or white noise. We have ocean waves playing all night for both kids, and for our 16 month old daughter, she has lullaby music and vibrations on her crib attachment that she has going WHILE she goes to sleep.
I have had the reverse problems. Both kids have been so hard to learn to sleep, then once they learned they're pretty good about it most of the time. Occasionally our 3 1/2 yr old son has a bad dream and we have to go in and rock him and calm him down again.
I really hope this gets better soon!

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