Caitlin - posted on 02/06/2010 ( 172 moms have responded )
Tell me..why did you decide to stay home.
Caitlin - posted on 02/06/2010 ( 172 moms have responded )
Tell me..why did you decide to stay home.
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Jessica - posted on 02/09/2010
I didn't want to miss a thing!
Leza - posted on 02/09/2010
It really wasn't a decision for me. I knew that if i decided to have children, i wanted to stay home with them until they start school. That doesn't mean we just stay home all the time. We go to playgroups, have playgroups, go to lunch with friends, go to movies, story times, etc. and when the kids are taking a nap i workout and do whatever i need to. We stay busy!
Lesli - posted on 02/09/2010
I always wanted to be a mom but I always wanted to be a teacher too. I was teaching when I had my first. I was able to find great care in my next door neighbor. They were like a second set of grandparents. They didn't charge to much so we could afford to leave her. She had one on one care with people who spoiled her rotten. I had to work to help pay the bills. My husband is in the military and he got orders to Germany. I was home with my little one for the summer and I loved every minute of it. I didn't miss teaching like I thought I would. I try to go back to work here but couldn't get a teaching job here because everything was filled, so I went and worked at the daycare center. I hated every minute of it. I was with other kids and not mine. I was basically working to pay for daycare, so I said enough. I'm miserable, my daughter is miserable so I quit. She also got sick and my daycare center did not understand is anyway. she was in the hospital for a week and they were angry because I didn't come in. Sorry I needed to be with my daughter. I have been at home with her now for over a year and she now has a little sister. I love every minute of it. Sometimes I do miss teaching but I know that I can go back to it when my girls are a little older.
Jo - posted on 02/09/2010
I don't want to miss a moment of my kids' lives.I was a nanny for ten years before I had my own kids.I got to share all those special times with other people's kids,other people who were missing out,and so were their kids.When it came to my kids I knew exactly what I want.I used to take my first baby to work,but that didn't work,then I tried leaving him with my Mum,but that didn't make us happy.When I stopped work to have my 2nd child,we knew that we 'd found what we wanted,and what was right
Leslie - posted on 02/09/2010
I'm a Christian and I believe being my first priorities besides God are my husband and then son. If I worked full-time, I wouldn't have the time/energy to care for my son. I believe staying at home with my son is what the Lord wanted me to do. I can train, love, and nurture him best since i'm his mom.
Shavaune - posted on 02/09/2010
I hated my job, hated my kids daycare, felt like i was spread way too thin! My husband was not the greatest helper at home! I still did the majority of housework, doctor appointments etc. Me and my husband had a talk and we decided it would be more productive to stay at home. I still watch other peoples kids before and after school to make extra money, cook from scratch (which my husband loves!) and the kids are happier and my house is cleaner. Since I'm happier it made everyone else happier so we decided that I would stay at home until their all in school. And i hated missing out on my kids milestones! Boy i could go on and on LOL
Anna-Maria - posted on 02/09/2010
I stay at home mostly because I have to. I have seizures and migraines...Medications have helped with some of my issues.....and I love to be with my daughter....
Sharon - posted on 02/09/2010
My job had told me during a "performance review" that the company law states that you were only allowed 3 sick days a calendar year..(um ok, right) they had told me i had taken to much time off. Which i will say was becasue I have a daughter w/ special needs and had been really sick. I was told if i called out sick or came in late I was goin got get fired. When I explained this to them countless times over the course of nearly 5 years that she was really and truly sick. W/her illness she looks fine most days. My boss (at the time) started to not believe me even when the childrens hospital called me at work. I wasnt allowed to take my calls and such. So ironically the boss's wife was my manager at the time when I left..It was her who told me one more time or else basically. But in the same breath asked if my daughter was better. I told her she is never going to be "better" not with her illness. At that point she sadi well i guess you arent coming back. My plan at that time since i thought I was on a leave of absence (which i found out much later that I was fired) to stay home until she was able to go back to school which was nearly 3 months after she came out of hte hospital..During those 3 months I got pregnant (on accident)...I was hoping to find a job but couldnt find one. Im still home now and I ahve been home for more than 3 years now. Im getting restless because we dont have any money EVER. my daughter does get SSI but it pays rent and such. Im w/ Anny's dad still but he says his money is his. I have no say over his paycheck and we are frequently having to go without one thing or another. The only reason why I am still home is because I have no childcare for my youngest and her father doesnt want to do it. I cant even go to school to find some job where I could stay at home. SO im in a real pickle most days wondering if im ever going to get back on my feet. Its been so bad i have been having to ask my ex-husband for things like money and such but only b/c we have 2 kids together. He helps me no matter what if he can but it bothers me..
Lisa - posted on 02/09/2010
Because I couldn't bear to be without them. My validation came when my oldest was in 5th grade. He forgot a book at school. I went over to school...with the 'you frustrate me..because I told you three times to take it with you' look on my face. I walked to his classroom and overheard a conversation between him and another boy. My son looked at my face and said,"oops, I am in trouble!". The boy said to him, "Is that your Mom?" My son replied..yep. The boy said something that I have never forgotten and took the look off my face and brought tears to my eyes..."Wow, your mom came to school to bring your book to you...I wish my mom didn't have to work so I could see her during the day." Never again have I begrudged the opportunity that my husband has provided us to have me at home. Oh, and they need you more as teenagers than they did as little people. I miss all the stages they went through...but I have been there for tough days at school, hard issues with friends and I am really connected to my children. There isn't anyone else who can do for them what I do. It is really rewarding to send 4 great people into society. I attribute that to my work....my full-time-24/7 work at home. You will be rewarded for your efforts. I cannot put a financial amount to what I do...for it is priceless.
Lora - posted on 02/09/2010
My husband and I decided that we wanted to be the ones to raise our children. Besides the cost of daycare!
I have been a SAHM for a year now and this past Christmas I picked up a weekend retail job I work a couple hours on Saturday and Sunday... w/the ability to request when ever I want. That gives me a little time away and some social interaction and the play money is great! :)
We still have plenty of family time all together and my husband gets much needed daddy bonding time with the babies.
Whitney - posted on 02/09/2010
Well we moved right after our son was born, but I wouldnt change being at home with him for anything. I love getting to see everything he does and every milestone he hits. I couldnt imagine someone else getting to spend all day with him.
Kenzi - posted on 02/09/2010
It has been very hard for me because I get tired of house chores, and I love the social of work. My mom stayed home though, and my husband asked if I would. I've come to love it! It isn't always easy, but it is worth it. My daughter talks to me about everything even though I can't understand most of it, and that is the type of relationship I want with her. I've come to see that most (not all but many) of the problems that parents have with their teens stem from not having a close relationship with their child and that comes from not being home. That is why I continue to stay home. If she can learn to trust me with all her worries and fears now, it will be easier for her to later.
Maria - posted on 02/09/2010
I decided to stay home because I am the best person to raise my children. I also think that I can teach them at home before they start school. This early childhood learning that people are talking about is much better done at home. And no, I don't buy beer and popcorn with my child tax credit!
Deanna - posted on 02/09/2010
I always wanted to be a mother and a wife, so that means i am a stay at home mom, also my husband and I had twins, they are my first born, and daycare was unaffordable especially for multiples, and my husband works a 40 hr wk job, and anymore income would not help us qualify for any assistance, or help. but i love it, it is everything i ever dreamed of...I got to see my children's frist everythings...that makes it more special!
Shantice - posted on 02/09/2010
My story goes back 6 years. I was 16 with my first child, in the 11th grade. My friend of like 9 years at the time, mom had an in home day care and was supposed to be my childcare provider so that I could go back to school after giving birth. I knew and trusted this lady, I was far from being a child in her day care myself growing up, but it was harder leaving my baby than I thought it would be.
To make a long story short, I eb=nded up dropping out of school and staying home than later realized that wasn't the way to go so I enrolled in a family support program that offered GEd classes, transportation & free child care on site. So I took that route and by the tme I finished and had more children, I was in a better place in my life, my 1st was headstart age and I was married and able to stay home with the other 2! I'm still the same about day cares..they're so scary to me! LOL!
Carolyn - posted on 02/09/2010
We just moved into a new city in Sept. According to the Day Care Coordinator here this city is short 300 day care spots. I told my husband right from the start that it wasn't worth it for me to find a job here. I have been with 2 different companies that do home parties and I'm in the process of starting a day care out of my home. Here the home day cares get a lot of government funding if they are licensed, so I'm working towards that. It works really well for us, my husband works 2 jobs (1 full time and 1 part time) so he's not home much, so no matter when he's home we're home too.
Veronica - posted on 02/09/2010
Firstly, because I felt it's what God wanted me to do.
Secondly, because when I got pregnant with my first, I was a preschool and infant/toddler teacher. Had I stayed at work, after paying for childcare, car insurance for a second car, and gas, I would have been bringing home about $35 a week. So, it definitely wouldn't have been worth it! Now that I am due with #2 any day...I would be paying out more than I'd be bringing in...so staying home is definitely the way to go.
Lisa - posted on 02/09/2010
As soon as we started trying for our first 6 years ago, I wanted to stay at home but it just wasn't in the cards. I was blessed, however, with a wonderful mother who took my daughter 5 days a week so I could keep working. I had a great job as a training manager but just missed my daughter. Once I got a work from home day, my daughter spent one day with my sis in law, one with me, and three with my mom. She was loved, comfortable, and well cared for but I still missed her terribly! Hubby has a unique degree for our area in media production so it took him a little while to find something where he made enough for me to quit. That was 3 years and a second kid ago and I'm living my dream! The mommy hours are crazy, the days may be long, and the job can be tough but the benefits far outweigh anything else :)
Jess - posted on 02/09/2010
The only thing I've ever wanted to be is a mummy. I realise that it's not for everyone, but I believe that a women's role is in the home.
Understandably some mums have to go back to work to meet financial needs, but I don't understand when mums put their children in full-time daycare and stay at home? Why would you want someone else raising your child when you could do it yourself and create an amazing bond between yourself and that child...
Sunya - posted on 02/08/2010
hey there caitlin, i would love to work, esp now that i have a masters degree in english literature i so want to teach somewhere, but my lil one is my priority and will continue to be so for the nxt few years! shes turning 3 this year and will begin school in august IA, but if i work my hours will clash with her school hours, i'll leave earlier and return later than her and theres nobody who could dress her n feed her for me, a three year old cannot come home to an empty house.... my hubby is very helpful and loving and close to our kids but hes not gr8 at dressng n feedng the kids... moreover, looking at the brighter side, this might be the only time i can relax and spend time with my kids, in the next couple of years , when theyll be older i'll definitely take up working which will not gv me enough quality time with them!
Helen - posted on 02/08/2010
I was raised by my grandparents and being old fashioned my grandpa worked and my grandma stayed at home. I was lucky enough to find my fiance who, his parents are the same way. His dad worked and his mom stayed at home and took care of the kids and house. so he grew up with the thinking of the man works and puts the shelter over his family and the woman stays home and takes care of the home and children and i am perfectly fine with that. I am a home body myself and absolutely love being home spending time with my daughter.
Melanie - posted on 02/08/2010
My husband and I realized that our sanity and our kids' happiness was more important than me working. It was definitely more cost-effective even before I started working from home. I'm a teacher and my husband is a fireman, so with our schedules, a lot of the burden would've been on me because my husband would've been working 2 jobs so we could live close to where we worked and pay for childcare.
I was hestiant in making the initial decision, but my husband was super supportive and wanted me to be home with the kids.
Now I get to work from home making extra money that we can put towards a house payment, and more importantly we get to have family days almost everyday. I love seeing my kids grow and learn things and how they interact with each other.
Daniella - posted on 02/08/2010
one reason was because i dont really trust daycare and its way to expensive and because i gave birth to them so i want to raise them
Nicole - posted on 02/08/2010
I always wanted to be a stay at home mom but at the same time i loved working. When my 1st child was born prematurely with health issues i continued to work for the first year and right before he turned one he had his first surgery and i could no longer leave him with other people. I have been a SAHM for 5 years now and 2 more kids later. My 1st born has since been through 20 surgery's and that includes a kidney transplant last year. My kids are 5,3 and 1. I love every minute of being a SAHM!!!!
Margot - posted on 02/08/2010
When I was a kid my mom worked and it sucked being a latchkey kid. I was always so envious of the kids whose moms were there to help at school parties or other events; pick them up after school; drop off their textbook if they forgot it; help chaperone field trips; pick them up from school if they felt sick or got hurt. I could go on and on.
Sure, being raised by others didn't kill me, but I wanted my mother, not some paid staff member. I have been a stay-at-home mom of three kids since my oldest was born 16 years ago. I haven't regretted my decision for a minute.
Rebecca - posted on 02/08/2010
I've always wanted to be a full-time mom, but I figured I would be a little older when it happened. My pregnancy was a big surprise, so I had to really think about what I wanted to do -- ultimately, a lot of factors went into my decision. I have a lot of childcare experience so I knew that it would be a good fit for me -- I know some people say they can't do childcare all day, even for their own child(ren). Plus I didn't really like the job I had before my son was born, and it would barely have paid for daycare. I couldn't imagine being away from my tiny, sweet baby for 8+ hours a day, for no good reason.
But most importantly, I knew it would be best for my son for me to be home -- I'm able to breastfeed without worrying about pumps/bottles; he's securely attached to me, not a nanny or daycare provider; he's very healthy (never sick until 8 months old, has only had 1 fever and only a handful of runny noses/colds) unlike all his peers in daycare; he can nap when he needs to nap, not on a schedule based on efficiency for a large group of kids; he can eat the healthiest homemade foods prepared by me; we can socialize with other children who I know are well-behaved and supervised by their parents, not running wild and hitting, pinching, biting, etc.; the reasons go on and on.
Normillah - posted on 02/08/2010
I had great income and the daycare here is superb until my second child...I had to hire a maid cos infant care is expensive...Then something just click that I do not want my children to grow up with a maid who is going to be at their back and call which happened most of the time and that their early childhood education is deteriorating...I find that teaching them moral values and anything got to do with school subject is important..therefore I quit my job..No regrets....I find that being a SAHM is not bed of roses but it is the most rewarding job that I ever hold...
Samantha - posted on 02/08/2010
I had always wanted to be a STAHM...and when my fiance decided that sounded like a good plan so that we wouldn't have to pay for daycare OR live in a super messy house that is what happened. Of course baby isn't here yet but April is coming fast! And our fur child is more than a handful
Elizabeth - posted on 02/08/2010
I always wanted to be a homemaker and stay at home mom, ever since I was a little girl. I couldn't bear to be one of those moms who has to hear about her child's first words or first steps from a babysitter/daycare worker. I want to be the one teaching and raising my children. Why have 'em if your not going to spend time with them? besides the fact that childcare is ridiculously expensive and many times kids get hurt/abused by their caretakers.
Torey - posted on 02/08/2010
For my 1st born I was not able to stay at home with him since my family really needed a second income coming in at the time. I truely missed alot with him growing up in those early years. Then 5 yrs later I became preg. with my twin girls and just decided at that time that it would cost us to much for daycare for them all. And what helped out is my husband is making enough money to support the whole family needs. I just love being home to watch the girls grow and greet my little man when he gets home for school.
Michelle - posted on 02/08/2010
I didn't want to put my child in a day-care center. Depressing just thinking about it. The truth is that I really love my life as a stay at home mom when everything is said and done.
Nicole - posted on 02/08/2010
I want to be around for my children and get to be a part of everything they do. Skiing, girlscouts, dance and anything that comes up. I worked alot for my daughters first few years and it made me sad. My husband doesn't make tons of money ut we get by and we are a very happy grounded family.
Kim - posted on 02/08/2010
I am a stay at home Mom, because it cost to much to put all Children in day care or baby sitter, and also I want to raise my Children the right way, Gods way, not the way of the world.I love my children and I want them to know its ok for their Mom to be a stay at home Mom, I am a Cheif, Maid,Taxi Driver, Accountant,Dry Cleaner,Nurse,Doctor,Teacher, and many more things to add to my list, But the Number 1 reson I stay home is because its rewarding and the best job in the world. I love it.
Amber - posted on 02/08/2010
CCR clean cook reproduce... i wanted to stay at home while my hubby worked its what we as moters are supposed to do .. raise our children... not nannys sitters and nurseries... im proud of all SAHM
Jessica - posted on 02/08/2010
My son made it. I went back to work when he was 6 weeks old. He got fired from 2 daycares so we decided he needed his mommy and I've been home ever since. He was 5 months old when I quit working and is now 6. He would be nice for a few weeks for his sitters and then gradually get worse - not eat, not sleep, cry cry cry. Best decision I ever made and I'm thankful that my husband makes just enough $$ for us to survive on.
Christi - posted on 02/08/2010
i didn't make the decision, i just didn't have a job so home i was. i love being home with my son though, i am dreading finding a job.
Chelsea - posted on 02/08/2010
well first i cant trust baby sitters. they freak me out, and i want to be the one to know what to do everytime my daughter freaks out. i always dreamed of being a stay at home mom even though i probably could of waited a year or two, but whatever i love it now. i want my child to know that i will always be here for her, i want to bond with her as much as i can, because i think its important, maybe i would of had a closer realationship with my parents if atleast one of them stayed with me. i want to teach her things myself, i want to see her grow and accomplish new things. and i want to make my husband happy when he gets home with a clean house and a home cooked meal. and i dont know how working mothers can come home and be all of those at the same time lol. but it defintally means a lot to me to be here with my daughter everyday.
Darlene - posted on 02/08/2010
My husband and I decided that our children were more important than anything money could buy. It's just not worth it. We are thankful that we made the decision a long time ago to make what ever sacrifices necessary to insure that is possible.
Brianna - posted on 02/08/2010
I figured me working a ft job so that my pay check could all go to paying for a day care was pointless, I would much rather raise my own child. And at the same time I am at home to cook, clean, do bills, or whatever, and I get to play with my little one as much as I want! :-D I love spending time with my baby boy!!
Yannet - posted on 02/08/2010
The first years of a baby are crucial for their development, it is in the first two years that a baby learns most of the things that will define her as an adult. For me, this was enough reason to stay at home, I don't want my baby to learn from a stranger at a daycare or from a family member. I want my baby to be a reflection of my husband and I; besides nothing will bring back those amazing memories of seeing your baby grow up and being there every tinny step of the way.
Susan - posted on 02/08/2010
because i had preemie twins and needed to be able to take care of them... then had another child 9 mths later and daycare is way to expensive. why would i pay someone else to raise my kids!!!
Danielle - posted on 02/08/2010
because i dont want some stranger being the first to see my baby girl crawl, walk say her first word etc, and i just dont trust anyone with my child, theres too many stories on the news about child abusers, nursery nurses, qualified child minders etc i just cant leave my child
Olivia - posted on 02/08/2010
I decided to be a stay at home mom becuse I love being there to see my sons milestones when they happen, and as long as I can afford it I will stay home. I love it even though at times it is very difficult.
Christa - posted on 02/08/2010
From the day my daughter my born I knew I was going to be a stay at home....that was the end of it.
Michele - posted on 02/08/2010
Cost effective. I was working full-time when I had my first child and we afforded the daycare fairly easily. When the 2nd child came along, that was when gas prices sky-rocketed and I was travelling 2 hours a day round trip. Plus having 2 kids in daycare - I was spending more than I was making. It was worth the change financially and mentally.
Sheree - posted on 02/08/2010
To me it is the right thing to do. It is my job to bring my daughter up, with my values and morals. I dont want some daycare bringing her or should i say dragging her up the way they want with no morals or values. She is gain the social skills she need through other avenues, and will attend a preschool for maybe 2 days per week a year before school. I believe and this is my opinion that if you cant afford to have your kids and bring them up yourself then you probably shouldnt have them.
Geraldine - posted on 02/07/2010
I didn't intend to stay at home. I liked the security of an extra income. My kids was 7, 5 and 3 when my husband told me it really bothered him that I was working and other people are raising our kids. He wanted our kids to be raised with our moral values. We have such a short time to spend with them and teach them, the years we loose, will be gone forever and he wanted me to quit my job. I didn't want to because we really needed the income and wouldn't survive on his salary alone. He insisted that he prayed a lot about it and he still felt we should put our trust in God. Well I kept going for 3 more months and then he said this is it, so I quit my job. He had asked his company if they give medical aid since I was the one who had it at my job. They told him no. I told him that we needed at least R2000 to make it. The day before I quit, I had to fill in my forms and take it personally to the personel department, but my superior already new I was resigning with 24 hour effect. That evening my husband asked me if I did give notice that I was quiting the next day....I said yes I did it the morning....he told me he was called in the afternoon to his boss, who told him, they thought about the medical aid that he asked for months ago and decided they would rather raise his salary with R2000 per month. Well to me that was a sure sign that we were doing the right thing. It's been 4 years ago now, we're still surviving and living quit good, we're happy, our kids is happy. People told us they could see the difference in how me and my husband and our kids are together since I'm a SAHM. I'm working a lot more, but I'm less stressed. I have more time and patience with my husband and kids. Me and my kids rarely gets sick, were as before, it was constantly because of the creche and working place. The Lord blessed our life's and I'm glad I listened to my husband. My husband is the head of our home, I'm his support and caretaker of the kids. Neighbours kids plays here all the time and I can monitor what things I allow.At school they hear a lot of bad stuff and it is my job to sort it out at home. My 2 oldest sons have ADHD and ADD. I really need to help them with their homework, that wouldn't have been possible with me leaving at 7 in the morning and returning 18:15 in the evening, cooking and cleaning then, and only then homework. My life so far has been filled with God's blessings.
Katie - posted on 02/07/2010
I want to enjoy my baby boy before I go to work....and I think bein a stay at home is more hard work then actually workin out in the real world lol...plus my husband works so that allows me to stay at home with my little one for the time being.
Taylor - posted on 02/07/2010
*I* wanted to be the one raising my child, not anyone else. Children grow up so fast & I wanted to make sure I didn't miss any minute of it! I've also been able to share so many special moments w/ my Daughter that I would've missed otherwise. Thankfully, my Husband makes enough money to support us financially. I feel very blessed!!
Steph - posted on 02/07/2010
My husband and I want to be the ones to bring up our kids, to watch them grow and pass on our values. I may go back one day a week when our little one is older (she's three months) and have her dad or nana look after her but at the moment that would only complicate matters. We plan to have many more and homeschool so I'll be at home for a while!