Stay at home mom
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Kristi - posted on 04/29/2010
I have kids in 1st grade and Kindergarden. Like many of the moms, I have stayed home since day one. This is the first year that both kids are in school full time. I think about going back to work, but even if I had a fairly flexible schedule or a part time schedule, I would risk not being available for every opportunity to participate in the kids school activities. Today was the ice cream social and I signed up as a "scooper". I could just sign up without having to check my schedule. I am trying to make some extra money with blogging and websites, but I can do that while the kids are at school.
My husband wants me to stay at home, and I definitely want to especially when I can find challenges and personal goals by blogging etc. My husband and I always say that I get to stay home not because HE makes a ton of money, but because WE make a ton of sacrafices. I can't see going back to work if I have the option.
Julie - posted on 04/24/2010
I plan on staying home still when my 2 start school. My husbands career causes him to not be available a lot so anytime something happen where they were sick etc i know I'd always be the one calling out. It'll be easier to keep our lives organized and have the comfort of knowing I'm available when things go off the normal schedule....and on the other hand if we really need some extra money come that time I'd be okay w going back to work.
Jessica - posted on 05/03/2010
My children are in school. I feel it is very important for me to be home for them. I volunteer in their classrooms once a week so I know what is going on. Also the first 4 years of school I feel is very important for a parent to be around for homework time when they get home from school. Learning to read takes a lot of time and patience. 6:00 in the evening is too late for the little ones. They are way too tired to think by then. In spending time in the classroom it is very apparent which kids have stay at home moms. Just because the kids aren't home during the day doesn't mean you aren't still needed to be there for them. It just means you have a few hours of your day where you can actually get cleaning done without being disrupted or run errands in peace. But my days don't seem to be any less busy.
Elissa - posted on 04/29/2010
my oldest daughter is 15yrs and my youngest is 4yrs and i have been a stay at home mum for that long and even though i dont have a paid job not one day do i get to sit down.. Even when they are at school..at the end of the day its the hardest job you will ever do ...
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Christine - posted on 08/26/2011
someone else mentioned the same thing that another mother had told me. she said that her kids neeeded her more when they were older than when they were younger. she, unfortunately was divorced, so had to work--but she aided in the school system which gave her pretty similar hours to her kids. my mother had to work while i waqs growing up----and i always wanted her to be home. my youngest is going into second grade this year and i do not work. i haave been a stay at home mom for 23 1/12 years---although there was one year, about 9 or 10 years ago that i did substitute teaching. i loved it at the start of the year---but by the end of the year i was shaking by the time i got out the door. i had most of my kids in school at the time and my mother, who had retired, watched my 2 yr old and my 4 yr old. i have fibromyalgia now, which is so unpredictable and it really leaves me with alot of fatigue----i don't know if i could work if i had to. we make enough to cover the bills, feed the kids, and dress them---my kids have worn some awfully nice clothes over the years thanks to yard sales and thrift stores!! if i could find something to do from home, though, i think i would---we really are not set up in any way for retirement and it makes me really nervous. i haven't logged enough hours in my lifetime to get social security, and my husband won't get very much. so, if anyone has nay good ideas out there on ways to generate income rom home---pass them my way!
Jennifer - posted on 05/06/2010
i'm a stay at home mom to two first graders. we have no littler ones, and no plans for any more, but I still stay home. the benefits are huge, and when we look at the price for before school and after school care, the money I would be able to pull in wouldn't be worth the extra hassle and craziness. I'd like to get a job that would alllow my husband to drop off at school and me to pick up, but so far there isn't much out there-or much for the hours while they are in school. after school sports and such make it difficult as well. I do work as a lunch lady for an hour and a quarter a day, and I love that, but even that means making sure to schedule house stuff more efficiently. it's great that we can afford to live with me at home, but extra income is always nice-either way though, mothering is a 24/7 job.
Tamsin - posted on 05/04/2010
My youngest has been full-time school since september, now he is settled I would like to have a part-time job that fits in around the school run.
I do enjoy being at home but 2 or 3 days a week out of the house working would be great the main problem I've come across is employers are not open to term time.
Shanna Lee - posted on 05/04/2010
Unfortunately I have some health issues so I am on SSD. But I have a 5, 7 and 14 year old and this has made it so I can stay home with them. My friends tell me I should have been born in the 40's or 50's cause I love to cook, clean and take care of my kids. I do wish my health were better but its nice being here for them. I was a latch key kid and I know my mom didnt have a choice but its nice to be here for my kids when they get home. My 5 year old starts kindergarten in Sept and I feel like I am gonna go thru Empty Nest cause she has been by my side for 5 1/2 years - always. Its a tough thing, but in todays world, most families dont have the financial ability to stay at home anymore.
I stayed at home while my kids were in school and now I homeschool them because I do not believe in mass education, Its not so much about the job as it is about dividing yourself too much, when we try to wear too many hats, mom, worker, housekeeper, ect...... we cannot be truely present in any of our jobs and it seems that the one that suffers the most is self, and then the kids. Also, once you get used to 2 incomes it is much harder to do without it. Your kids need you to be available to them. Life is about relationship, being available when they need us, being truely present when with them, and trust, that they can count on us. We must do what we can to provide that for those we love.
Jenn - posted on 05/02/2010
When my kids are all in school full-time (they are only 4 and 1 1/2 right now) I will definitely get a job again! What would I do all day otherwise? Plus that way we can actually have extra money to do things and have a life again. Right now with only him working it's really tight financially.
Tanya - posted on 05/02/2010
I have 4 children aged 8,7 , 5 & my youngest is 4 in June . By September I will have 4 children at school I will be a stay at home ma , as my children are backwards & forwards to doctors & hospital , my 5 year old son has problems with his bowels & if school phone up ,I have to collect him , so I have to be at home for various reasons.
I have 2 kids, My youngest is 15 and I still stay home. I am able to volunteer at school. So many parents volunteer when thier kids are small (nursery and kdg) but so few are able as they get older due to work commitments. I have a great relationship with my kids. It is great to be a part of their activities and help out their school.
Adolescent kids need as much time and attention as toddlers.
The common misconception that "they don't need you anymore" is just that - a misconception.
"what about your life girls?
you live for them and later what will be happening?
when the kids will be big and married?
and you sacrifice all your life for them?" --Laura Istratescu
I'm not sure if you are referring to working mom's giving up everything in order to make time for working to provide extras for their kids, or SAHM's not working in their dream jobs, but In response to your questions, I am a SAHM and will continue to be once my son (my only) starts school this Fall. I don't feel I sacrifice my life for him, he is very much a HUGE part of my life, and he is the reason I chose to stay home in the first place, but I still have a lot in my life that is just for me and does not revolve around him. I volunteer w/ YouthBASE, I have my friends I enjoy "mommy time" with and will continue to meet with even once the kids are in school, I have an artistic hobby and am even in a couple of galleries, and I love to read--books, articles, you name it! Once my son starts school, he will still be a huge factor in my decision to stay home (I will volunteer in his school, PTA, stay involved in his sports, be home in the evenings to cook and help with homework), but I am also looking forward to having more time for myself.
I don't think their is anything wrong with going to work part time once he is in school, and if I thought it would make me happy, I'd probably do it, but I just can't imagine I would be happier working behind a desk or in a store for 5 hours a day than I would be having brunch with my friends, drawing, reading a good book, volunteering, or just getting my nails done. I don't have time for those things right now, and once he goes to school I will finally have time to do something for ME again :)
Sara - posted on 04/28/2010
Four of my five kids are in school, and they need almost more help and supervision than my toddler! I love volunteering at their school and supporting other "stay at home" moms. I'll go back to work someday, but am enjoying this part of my life!
Jess - posted on 04/28/2010
I never pictured myself as a stay at home mom. At times I get frustrated with it because I need to be independent at times. But I love my kids and I would not give up this time with my babies for anything. I am a student and once I get my degree I will be going to work, before they start preeschool. Most likely it will be at night so that I can be with my children during the day. After all I am only working to make their lives better. I do not look down on women who decide to become home makers. That is a very big sacrifice and I commend those women who can do it successfully.
Barbara - posted on 04/28/2010
I homeshool so I guess I have to stay home....lol, but seriously, Keeping the house clean, cooking, etc. is a job so why feel bad about staying home even if your child or children are in school. People used to think you were a bad mom if you left your children to work outside the home, but now your bad if you stay home. Best advice I can give is do what is best for your family. If you can stay home and enjoy it then do it. I couldn't for years. I had to work, but now I am able to stay home and my entire family is happier. God bless.
Nikki - posted on 04/28/2010
I am a stay at home mom and my daughter is in the 1st grade when shes at school i get all my cleaning done and that leaves me time when shes home to help with homework get her ready for softball and practice with her when she doesnt have a game.
Lisa - posted on 04/28/2010
I wanted so much to be a stay at home mom that when the kids went to school I stayed home. Then I realized that I could school better so now we stay at home and school..... Yes I would stay home anyways.............I think it is important for mommy to be home when the children are...............
Jenn - posted on 04/28/2010
I am a stay at home mom. My son is just about 1 1/2. When he is about 3 or so, I hopefully want to have another baby. But when both children start school, I would like to try to go back to work. I am very lonely sometimes being at home. My son is very independant already so sometimes I feel very bored. I enjoy being here and sharing every new thing but once they are old enough I feel I wopuld have nothing to do here.
Jessica - posted on 04/28/2010
I have 2 boys in school and my third boy is only 2 yrs old. When he hits school age I do not want to go back to work. So I started a home business that I hope will be running full speed, by then. I love being home and despite my husband's concerns about money I know he wouldn't change it. Both of our moms did not work, even when we were in school. The kids get breaks and random days off, not to mention summer that you need to cover if you work outside the home.
Shannon - posted on 04/27/2010
I have 3 in school now , next year will be 4 in school and 1 at home. I went from working full-time salon owner to moving away, knowing nobody and not working at all. the way I see it I have about 2 more years to enjoy my kids full time before I find a second career. I say this now but who knows what will happen when my youngest starts school. Housework is no picnic but I love the fact it gets done and I'm worried it won't if I start work again. Tough question for me..
Emily - posted on 04/27/2010
I have a 3 month old, but my mom did and did after school day care and when she went back to work after divorce her best friend babysat me in the summer and she stayed home too so I got to see her daughter who was my BF all summer.
Jeanette - posted on 04/27/2010
i have 2 kids one at 14 and one at 9 years old. they are both at school and i am still at home. although that is because my youngest is disabled and i have to be around in case she has to be sent home. but i think it is a personal decision, if you feel happier at home then you should stay at home. dont let anyone pressure you into doing any thing that you are not happy with.
Jennifer - posted on 04/27/2010
My girls are going back to brick and morter school next year, I'm taking that first year to write. If I finish a book great if not then writting will stay a hobby. My husband and I have talked about what I will do after that year, if I get published then I will consintrate on that if not it will go back to being something I do in me free time. If I don't get published I want to go back to school and eventually get a job teaching Lit. But for now we know that if I was working my hubby does not like not having me here when he gets home, he's a little lost when I'm not. I did work for a while after my youngest was born, I missed a ton of stuff with her, my hubby felt negletced and I felt like I was missing everything with them. Its hard to say, yes I would like to teach if I go back to work but I want to be here for my family when ever they need me, not just after work.
Mary - posted on 04/27/2010
I will probably stay home even when my daughter goes to school. I don't think I'll ever be able to work again. I'm on S.S.I. for a disability right now and unless something drastically changes that's the way things will stay. My daughter will be starting kindergarten in the fall.
Tiffany - posted on 04/27/2010
My youngest starts school in the fall and I will continue to stay home. I have been a SHM all of my childrens lives. It's what they're accustomed to and it's how we have organized our lives. I have had some part time stints here and there but nothing long term. As they get older their needs just change, they dont go away. I can be active in their schools, take them to after school sports and other activities. Most everyone have already listed everything that a SHM does after he kids go to school so I wont list them again. The biggest bonus is not being tired after a long day of work and having to come home and tend to a needy family.
Jasmine - posted on 04/26/2010
My son is 4 months and I started working part time. Seriously a few hours of work during the week, how much are you really going to miss out on? Some people make it sound so easy to transition from staying at home to jumping back into the work field years later. Imagine that...I still consider myself a stay at home mom because I am the sole caretaker and spend the majority of everyday with my child. The reason I chose to work is for the little money, sure, but more so I gain experience and do not have that gap in my resume. What do you fill that with, stay at home mom for 5 years? I'm not stopping my career goals completely for my child, I have to better my self to be a good role model. I wont work full time because of child care expenses, don't want to miss out on too much and I don't want anyone else raising my child. So I go to school online, work a few hours in the afternoon, take care of home and take care of my child. Not knocking anyone for their decisions because everyone has their own reasons, just putting mine out there ;) Thanks!
My son will be starting full time school this August and I have absolutely no plans to go back to work. My child will NOT be a latch-key kid or be forced to attend boring after school care just so I can afford nicer shoes or a McMansion. I intend to be active in the PTA, volunteer in his classroom during the day, and continue my volunteer work with YouthBASE (which I care very deeply about). My son is involved in Taekwondo, Baseball, swimming, and horseback riding, (different seasons, not all at once) and will be taking Piano once school starts. I think I deserve my one or two days at home to clean and relax each week--I don't get to sit down and relax in the evenings, and once school starts evenings will probably be even more hectic. Even if I wanted to go to work, I just don't think I could balance it all. Kudos to those of you who can :)
Ali - posted on 04/26/2010
My oldest is in school, my youngest is 2-1/2. I am looking for part time work right now to get a sanity break!! Once they are both in school full time I will more than likely work 30-40 hrs a week around their school schedules of course.
Lorie - posted on 04/26/2010
I don't understand why if your kids are in school full-time that mom's can't get a job. Even a part time job.
Some of the mom's on here SOUND like they just don't want to work and are using their children as a excuse. It is very important to be in your children's life as much as possible but come on.
Someone was talking about Daycare and you can only right off so much. Who cares, thats your child. Wouldn't you want the best for your child no matter how much you can right off.
Sunsine - posted on 04/26/2010
Yes I have told my son that Its just to much on me to keep up with the baby,But he just dont seem to understand what Im saying to him. See I have a 10 yrs old and a 5 yr old already. They can do pretty much on there own but the baby needs us all the time. I just dont know what to do.
Lisa - posted on 04/26/2010
are you put down as your grandchild's gaurdian? Because if they are the parents and are placing all the responsibilities & care on you & your husband they should certainly listen to what you're saying. They should put your grandchild in your guardian care, this way if anything happens you know it will b taken care of. You should start by sitting down w/ the parents & tell them if anything happens, you want your grandchild to b taken care of & if the parents don't seem to care...make arrangements for an open adoption where your son & his girlfriend knows that they lose their child if they don't start to straighten up. they must have signed their rights as parents already if the child could go to foster care. Many couples want children & if you can find a good couple who is willing to allow you to see your grandchild...it would be best for you & your grandchild for her future...look @ what is best for her.
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