Stay at Home Mom?

Nancy - posted on 07/25/2011 ( 118 moms have responded )

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I just wanted to know how many people want to always be stay at home moms? And what are your views or reasons for this?

Also, I would like to hear from some long time stay at home moms and what they feel about this?

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Angie - posted on 08/13/2011

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I never planned on being a stay at home mom, but when we found out that we were having twins in our first ultra sound things changed. The price of daycare doubled, insurance doubled everything came down to money but i still planned on going back to work, then when put on bed rest at 31 weeks for my babies it made me think how much i missed durring my pregancy when i worked 40 hrs all kinds of retail hrs, and then when i held them in my arms i knew i was not going back to work and for the last 2 yrs i will not change it i love being a stay at home mom. just remeber for you sanity you will need to have time to yourself and when you get it take it, the dishes can wait a few hours. i wish you luck, also day care and expense of me working was more then when i stayed at home.

Breda - posted on 08/10/2011

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To be honest I know nothing else than staying at home for the past nearly 9 years! My youngest is starting school in September and I'm looking into do a night course so I can be there for my children for when they come home from school. I have the utmost respect for moms who go to work everyday, it's just not for me.

Kim - posted on 08/09/2011

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I haven't always been a stay at home mom. When I had my first child at 18, I went to work when he was 3 months old (left him w/ his grandparents while I worked) because I had to work to pay the bills. He was my only child for 15 years and I worked full time. When I met my current husband, he had 2 children from his previous marriage and I got pregnant right away. Since his job can support us, it made sense for me to become a SAHM since any money I would make wouldn't even cover day care. We've since had a 2nd child together bringing the grand total to 5 kids (4 still at home now) so for us, it's just the way to go. I feel very lucky to be able to be a SAHM mom with my kids now since I didn't get that opportunity with my oldest. But I have no judgement for women who want to work. Whatever you need to do to be happy in your home & life, you should do it.

Jacqueline - posted on 08/09/2011

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i am a stay at home mum and havent worked since i found out i was pregnant i got a 20 month old daughter and a 7 wk old son i love seeing them grow n learn new thing and the reason i want 2 b a stay at home mum is i want 2 raise my kids no 1 else

Treasa - posted on 08/09/2011

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I would love to be a stay at home mom. I got a little glimpse of it after losing my job and being home for 18 months. I had to go back to work for financial reasons of course. But I loved being at home with my kids and taking care of everything on a day to day basis. We had so much fun. I would go back to it in a heart beat if the opportunity arose.

Amanda - posted on 08/08/2011

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well i always hope to be a stay at home mom because i want to be the one to always be there for my kids. i want to see every moment of them growing up and not miss anything. my mom was a stay at home mom for me and my sister and i am glad she was always there. there is nothing wrong with mom wanting to be working moms either but for me its what i feel is right for me and my little ones. because of financial situations i did work for one year while my son was 2 and it was really hard on the both of us and i worked a lot but now i am not working and i am home with both my kids all the time and we love it. its a new experence every day my son is about to start school and i have a little girl who is almost a year old.

Angie - posted on 08/08/2011

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All my children are in school, so being a stay at home Mom for me is especially important. I like to be here for anything they might need and I feel they are less "tempted" to make bad choices if they know Mom is always around. (Mua ha ha!)

Elizabeth - posted on 08/08/2011

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I grew up with a stay at home mom. It was wonderful! She was able to walk us to school, get us for lunch, and be there when we came home. I always knew, that for me, this was always my view of raising children. With my first child, I worked ALL the time....But I was a single mom and I had to do it. When I met with my now husband we had this conversation. It was/is very important to both of us. We want to have this ability with all our future children. My son, daughter, and husband all appreciate what we may have to give up in pocessions for this to happen. But all in all I will never regret staying home with my family because that's what I do as my husband works 18 hours a day! :)))

Heather - posted on 08/08/2011

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I have been a SAHM for about 1 1/2 yrs. I have a 2yr daughter and a son due in 9 wks. :) Honestly, I was never sure that I wanted to be a SAHM, but after my husband and I discussed it, It didn't really pay for me to work and put my daughter in daycare. SO, I stay-at-home, do volunteer work 1x/wk, she goes to daycare 2x/wk. This gives me a break and her some social time, which has really been wonderful. We have no family in the state where we now live, so it has been great. I have every intention of going back to work either part-time, or full-time when they are both in school. I also intend to finish an associates degree that I started before we moved.

My biggest hurdle with being a SAHM is that I'm just too independent. :) I've had a job since I was 14, paid my way through a Big 12 school, and I like to shop. LOL. I do NOT like to be/feel dependent on anyone. My husband is a little old fashioned, in that regard, and so has no problem with it, but he still understands my reservations (even now).

Patty Ann - posted on 08/08/2011

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I quit work after my first daughter was born, stayed with her until she was starting school, then took some part time jobs in our community so I would be near her and could arrange my schedule so I could be involved in her life. When I had my second daughter, who just graduated high school, I again worked a few part time jobs, arranged my schedule to accommadate hers, and it has worked great! I love being at home, cleaning, cooking and just running the household in general. I like that they depended on me, wanted me to be there, and I feel like I have done a great job along with my husband to raise our family.

Shelby - posted on 08/08/2011

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That's a great topic! I've been a stay-at-home mother of two (Keira: 3yrs & Blake: 16mo) for just over a year now. I liked it at first because I was Active-Duty Army for 4yrs.. and to be home with the kids truly helped me feel useful as a Mom. I felt bad dropping my daughter off at 430am and picking her up at 630pm Monday-Friday. So, once I knew I could be honorably discharged from the Army, I told my husband that I would stay home to watch them and save money (my son was just barely 3mo when I was discharged). I like the idea of staying home to raise the children, but I think my heart still belongs to the Army. I want the best for my kids and with my husband still in the Army, I want to at least work part-time or attend school to bring in extra money. We're doing okay now, but I love to have that extra money for that "rainy day" which occurs at the worst times, lol. Well, I think I'll pass the reins over to our local daycare within the next few months and get back to work.. either with the Army Reserves full-time (September 2011) or just working full-time in general. But don't get me wrong.. I sure love my fellow stay-at-home mama's :)

Lisa - posted on 08/08/2011

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I am a stay at home mum. I gave up work when I went on maternity leave with my son. I also had a daughter who was at morning nursery. My son was born in may so my daughter was starting full time school September. I wanted to be the person waiting at the gate.
My son is so clever because I took the time to talk to him and explain things.
I still don't work my daughter is 10 and my son is 7. I would never change a thing. I tidy the house, make meals from scratch and meet friends. I'm never bored.

Anja - posted on 08/08/2011

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I have been a stay at home mum for 7 years now and my children absolutely revolt when I jokingly suggest I go back to work. My teenage daughter needs me more now than when she was younger.

Bridgette - posted on 08/08/2011

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WOW, Karen, I am so sorry if I offended you somehow. All I said is that I don't think I would have caught my sons autism as early as I did had I not been home. I Never suggested that every disabled child is able to do the same things that others do! My plan was to share my experience in response to the question. Be blessed!!!

Donna - posted on 08/08/2011

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I am currently a stay at home mom with my 5th son. I stayed home with my 1st son a year, my 2nd almost 2 years, my 3rd a year, my 5th 5 weeks then back to work. I plan on staying home as long as possible or until he starts pre-K or K.
I have more time/energy to do things that need to be done and things that I'd like to do. I enjoyed making special cakes for birthdays and school parties, where as once I was back at work, I didn't have the energy or time to do these special things for my boys.
My oldest is now married, out of the military and gainfully employed. My 2nd is in his last year of college, my 3rd is going off to bootcamp this month and then to college in Jan. None of my boys have ever been in trouble with the law, much less at school. They played sports at school and rec dept and are very highly thought of by their peers and adults. For me it was the right thing to do.

Misty - posted on 08/08/2011

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I have worked in an ice cream store, Wal-Mart, 7 years in EMS as an ambulance driver, I've cared for elderly people all of which taught me patience in some manner or another. These are the very patience I use daily to raise my two little girls! I think our season's change for a reason, we each take pathes that lead us to where we are today and if being a stay at home mom is where you are...by all means enjoy it! Who knows where your path will lead in the future! I'm not only a stay at home mom but I homeschool them as well!! Not to mention being the chef, maid, driver...etc. I AM their life as they are mine! You get out of it, what you put into it! I think it's awesome...it's what I'm supposed to be doing at this time of my life. Oh and FYI - I'm 38 yrs old, my girls are 2 and 5!! :)

Lori - posted on 08/08/2011

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I've been a SAHM since 1992 (4 kids, ages 18, 13, 12 & almost 5) and it's the most demanding, underpaid & stressful job I've had to date, but nothing in the world is more rewarding than a hug from a toddler or seeing your teenager becoming a thinking & caring adult.
I worked briefly when our eldest was about 2 & my husband went back to grad school. Liked the job, had full time family care (aunt) but still hated leaving my daughter at home all day even though I knew she was very well looked after... I missed seeing her discover new things & just teaching her things myself. I've never had time to be bored! Yes, there have been times I wanted to have a "grown up" conversation but I also found that no matter what people do for a living (including SAHM's) all they ever do is talk about work anyhow :D
By the time my youngest is off to college I'll be 61 and ready to "retire" when most people do. This IS my job and it's never ending. Personally, I just can't see having children if you don't want to spend as much time with them as possible (and sometimes not much IS possible for many different reasons so I understand that!). My mother was forced to go back to work after a divorce (I was already in school) and I hated not having her be there when I got home & doing all the things with me she could before. And I felt guilty if I was sick and she had to take time off work etc. To answer the main part of your question - I do have a degree, did work outside the home for nine years before having children & have always wanted to stay at home with my children if & when I had them. I feel very lucky to be able to do so.

Toni - posted on 08/07/2011

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I have been a SAHM for 8 years next month!! I love it! I can't imagine not being able to see all of my babies' firsts, or not being the one that teaches them all of the things that they need to be the wonderful people that they will grow to be. ♥ Not that I am knocking hard working moms that also have to work outside of the home, My mother was one!!! And a GREAT one too!! :)
I plan on staying a SAHM until my youngest(17 months) enters school, then I suppose I will get a job. I am looking forward to it, but am in no hurry for it. If that makes any sense. ♥

Megan - posted on 08/07/2011

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I have 5 kids and have been a SAHM for the last 10 years, since my oldest was born.

I love it and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I imagine I'll be a SAHM until they've all graduated high school. I homeschool them, and aside from that I cook every meal and clean.

I love the benefits to staying home - I love being a mom and think it's very important to be the one raising my children. I cherish the time we spend together. I also enjoy looking after my house. Being a SAHM, I get to decide everything we do and when. There's no-one barking orders at me, and I feel like my position in the family is valued.

Helena - posted on 08/07/2011

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My son is 3 years old & I've been at home with him the whole time. I don't intend on going back to a regular job. It's not just housework & activities with my son though, I am a web designer & starting a new property renovation business (hiring others to do the renos, not me).
I don't think I could manage without having some activities of my own, and I really do like having the flexibility of being at home.
I wrote a blog post about this subject a few years back which is still pretty relevant - http://www.newageretromum.com/marriage/i...

Hope that helps

Helena :)

Cassie - posted on 08/07/2011

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unfortunately, some of us cant work and have 2 just enjoy the unpaid 24/7 job called wife n mother.

Karen - posted on 08/07/2011

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With all due respect Bridgette, not everyone has a child with disablities that will sit and read with their mom or make cookies. I'm so glad you did have that time with your son and he is doing well. I only wished that my son could sit for a minute to listen to a story, or my advice, or make cookies. There are a lot of Moms who are just praying to get by everyday and do the right thing for their kids. I wish you could show more compassion. No two moms are the same :)

Dawn - posted on 08/07/2011

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I am a S.A.H.M. but, it wasn't something that was planned it just works best this way for my family.

Bridgette - posted on 08/07/2011

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When I was young, I never even wanted to get married, let alone have children!!! When I met my husband at the age of 18, all of that changed!!! When I got pregnant with my first, I figured I would continue working until she was born and then go back after she started 1st grade. Well, the bank I was working for got bought out and I was let go. I called my husband crying and he picked me up and immediately went to our local pizza restaurant and disappeared inside. I was a complete wreck!! He came out about 15 minutes later and told me he started as a driver that night. I was in love with my daughter when I first saw her and was so glad to be with her every day!! We decided to have another baby and I got pregnant with our son. The plan was to go back to work after he was in 1st grade. At the age of 15 months, I noticed something was not right and he was diagnosed with autism at the age of 2. My husband had been working as much overtime as he could get and taken many part time jobs when times were tough!! We decided that I would just be at home from then on!! My daughter is now 16 and a great young woman!! She has a lot of respect for herself and others. My son is 11 and has gone from completely non-verbal and non-responsive to being a very intelligent, talented, and loving young boy. Many people who knew him when he was a toddler cannot believe he is the same boy! If I had not been home, I don't even know if I would have caught his autism as soon as I did. When I first called his pediatrician told me that I could not compare his developement with that of his sisters as "boys develope slower that girls". When I brought him back a second time, he apologized To you moms who get bored or lonely-what do you do all day?! When my daughter was an infant, I would clean my house and make a wonderful dinner for my husband to show him how much his hard work meant to our family. When that was done, we went on nature walks and I talked to her about everything she saw and heard. We spent time with close by family, and friends from church and our neighborhood. When she was older, we joined a play group. It was free and specifically made for children to get out and play with other kids to learn to socialize. The moms and dads would break into a group in another room and give eacother tips and have a question and answer period with our group facilitator. I LOVED that time!!!!! When my son came along my daughter was in kinergarten and there was volunteering in the classroom and homework and sleepovers and cookie baking and everything a wife and mother does!! My daughter is off doing her own thing now and my son has learned to be pretty independent as well. We still talk and read and sing together. I am in the middle of teaching him how to cook:) My husband and I enjoy our weekly breakfasts out and seeing movies and I enjoy having girls day with my friends as well!! I also teach Sunday school class to the high schoolers at church. With all of the things we have to do, I really do not understand how boredom or lonliness could even be a factor! Enjoy your children everyone!!!!

Karen - posted on 08/07/2011

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I love being a stay at home Mom. My kids are growing into adults now..my daughter will be 18 and my son 21 by the end of the year. When they were young I did have a lot of lonely times. My husband and I moved to a neighborhood that did not have many moms with small children. I did go out with friends sometimes but my son was quite a challenge with severe ADHD and OCD! Because of that most of the years have been stressful. I love my kids and would not change my son in anyway.

I think during the times they were small, I would have liked to have gone to work but really couldn't. I did work at my church as organist, pianist, choir director, and so on. That did take a few hours away to be me. Looking back now, I never regreted that I stayed at home with my children. I can certainly understand both sides of the coin...I tip my hat off to Moms that can work outside of the home and maintain the family. People seem to argue this point back and forth with each other which is just a waste of time. Both sides of the coin are wonderful. As the years went by I taught piano lessons on the side for quite a few years and then I started to work from home. I love being connect to other women and moms who have the same goal as I do. We have a connection (to me) that is like no other so I never feel alone. I work with people all over the US & Canada and help people so that has been very fulfilling to me. I have my own identity now (somewhat) LOL, and my Mom & Wife hat too! Like I said, I never look back and say shoulda, woulda, coulda. My decision was based on what I really wanted to do, and what my family needed. I don't think stay at home Moms or working Moms should ever feel guilty about what they are doing or what they want or need to do. I think every Mom is special and we need to look at each other with great respect.

Kim - posted on 08/07/2011

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I have always wanted to be even before I had kids. My oldest is 8 years old & I have stayed home since he was 10 months old. I feel that as a mother I need to be with my kids & I should be the one raising them, not a babysitter or daycare. God blessed me with my kids & I feel that being a mother is the most important job I am responsible for.

LEAH - posted on 08/07/2011

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My oldest daughter is 15 years old. I stayed at home with her until she was around nine months old and then I went to school. It was a community college and I really enjoyed it but I hated that I had to put her in daycare. Right after I finished I started working. At first I really loved it because I was a single mother and it felt great to be supporting us and doing well financially.

My job demands increased along with the money, but in my heart I didn't feel it was worth it. I wanted to be home with her so bad. At my job the men all had wives who stayed at home and nannies! When the weather was bad and the daycare would close I would have to miss work or come in late and they did not understand why my nanny couldn't just care for her. Now while I was doing well financially...I wasn't doing that good!

My luck changed and I had to get foot surgery and I was off for a few months. I enjoyed my time off so much I decided instead of going back to corporate America I would watch children at home. I also began to do fostercare. I ended up with a very medically fragile little girl so I couldn't work anyway.

Now, six years later I have adopted 2 children and I currently have custody of my ten month old twin brothers (from my father). I have five chidlren with special needs so it does not appear I will be going back to work any time soon. I am okay with that. I

I feel like I am getting a chance to do things I love. There is never a dull moment around here. I have plenty of opportunities for adult conversation. I am in a mom' s group as well as groups for the kids. I have friends and family that I talk to so I don't feel lonely. I never get bored because I have so many appointments to take the kids to along with all of their activiites. I love it and wouldn't change it for the world. But I do understand nor do I judge women who choose to do otherwise.

Kristin - posted on 08/07/2011

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I went from working 70 hours a week to being a SAHM almost overnight-my son came a bit early. The plan was to take a few months off but it has just been more cost efficient for me to stay home for now. My son is 10 months old and I just found out I am pregnant again so my plan of possibly going back to work has been delayed yet again. Am I happy? Yes, for the most part. I cherish being here for every milestone and I am lucky that my son is very happy (although energetic) in nature. But it has been more challenging than I expected...and thankless and lonely. My husband gets home while or after I have put my son to bed so I am basically-for now anyway-doing everything kid related myself. Also, I was the main breadwinner so it has been a blow to us financially. But, I did not have a job with great hours or that I particularly enjoyed so it made sense to quit. I feel like I never quite made it to where I would like to be career wise or have that certain something for myself. So, after my babes start school I am going to go back myself. But until then I want to learn how to really enjoy this time I have with them!

Angela - posted on 08/06/2011

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I have been a stay at home mom for 17 years we moved to a really rural community in which I did not have my license nor family to help me, child care would have been outrages for all my children so I stayed home to take care of them and the household. Now that they are older I am in the process of getting my license and upgrading and going back to work. I am excited to get back to working I never once thought I would be a stay at home mom this long, but I am glad my children had me home while they were growing. I get a lot of rude comments but I know that it was the right decision for us.

Elizabeth - posted on 08/06/2011

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I quit work four months into my pregnancy so I could concentrate on the health of my baby. It took us seven years to get pregnant, and we didn't want to take any chances. I stayed at home until he went into kindergarten, then went back to work. I didn't want somebody else raising my son; experiencing his firsts, knowing more about him than I did. I wanted to experience everything I was told I would never have. In doing this, I never had to worry about whether he was taken care of properly or if he was even in the best care. I felt I knew what was better for him rather than some stranger I was going to have to get to know and trust. I was able to take him to all of his appointments, and be there when he took his first steps.

I really enjoyed having that time with him. He is now seven, and I know that even though I would want to stay in the workforce, if I were to get pregnant again I would be a SAHM all over again.

Sherri - posted on 08/05/2011

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Your kids are still with you when they are older. What about the hours before and after school?? I bring my kids to school several days a week. Get them to doctors appts, dentist appts. etc (during school days)and If they are sick at school or are sick from school I am already with them or can get them at a moments notice, all their activities before and after school, help with homework, make sure they have a home cooked meal by 5pm every night and make sure I am here every single day when that bus pulls up.

I have a 14, 12, 5 yr old and one on the way. I probably will never go back to work outside my home. As I have been a SAHM for the last 11yrs and my husband and I agree I will be a SAHM until all the kids are out of high school. That will put me at 58yrs old so it will be doubtful if I will ever find a job in my field again after being out of the workforce due to raising my kids for 25+ yrs.

Alicia - posted on 08/05/2011

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there are a lot of moms on here saying they will be SAHMs till their kids turn 18, IMO you cant be a SAHM if your kids arent home with you. i have been a SAHM for almost 2 years now. i personally dont like it at all. i feel bored, lonely, and like im not helping our family out. dont get me wrong i love seeing my daughter grow, and learn, and i know she wouldnt know all she does if she was in daycare. but im honestly ready for kindergarten to start so i can get back to working on myself and all i deserve!

Nicole - posted on 08/04/2011

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I have four boys. my oldest is starting kindergarten this year and the conversation of my going to work when the youngest is in preschool came up. If it was up to ME, I would stay a sahm even when they are all in school because there are so many school activities that I want to be available for (then multiply that by 4). I really think that the housework would be enough to keep me busy as a housekeeper for us lol! Everyone (husband, parents and inlaws) are all pushing for me to become a teacher. (MIL is a teacher) so I would be off when the kids are off. The thing is though, a mother is never "off". I would have to work more because a teacher has to go in to inservice days, before school begins and after school lets out for summer. Who will watch the kids during those times? I would work all day and still have to do (or supervise) errands, bills, cooking, cleaning, laundry, homework and grading, after school activities, church activities, and somehow make time for family quality time.
Yes, another paycheck would be awesome! I am not looking forward to it though. Maybe just a part-time job will suffice at that point. At least I can enjoy this time for another two years before I am faced with having two jobs!

Kel - posted on 08/04/2011

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I have a nine year old daughter. She was three days old when she came home to us and we adopted her at nine months. I have been a sahm her whole life and plan to continue. I waited so long for her to come into my life. I can't bear to miss a moment.

Amanda - posted on 08/02/2011

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I've been a sahm for 12 years now. I've never had a"real" job the only thing I know is inside my home. I have 3 kids ranging from 5-11 years old. It has been rough and stressfull esp. since we have a daughter that immune def,gastro issues and asthma. This year is the 1st year I'll have a 3 kids in school so I'll be able to finally start talking care of myself a little (dentist,dr.appts,hair appts etc.) Those are the things I missed. I've been so stressed all these years I dont know if I can unwind myself. I've seen kids that walk themselves to school and home in the heat and freezing cold just because their parents are at work. I feel its unfair to the child thats their mom isnt there for them. Ive also seen kids at school functions with no parents(how sad is that). I understand that most familes need 2 incomes now days,but for me IF I had to do it over again I would do the way I am.

Brandy - posted on 08/02/2011

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I've always wanted to be a sahm - my hubby and I even discussed that as our plan for life when we were still in high school. It took awhile for us to get there (our oldest was 9) and happened in steps. I first worked 3 days a week, then 2, then none. I've been at home full time for just over 2 years now. I now have 5 kids and work just wouldn't be feasible at this point, monetarily or time wise, even if I wanted to work.



I think this is a totally personal choice, though. I've always felt like it's best for a parent to be home for the kids whenever possible to give them the stability that involves. However, if mom is miserable doing that, it would be better for her to be at work and be able to enjoy the time she does have at home. I've never really found work that I look forward to or really enjoy. I had a good job as an accountant, I was good at it & I always felt that it was the career I would enjoy most if I had to work. But, I just always wanted to be at home with my kids. I think that fulfillment in work make a big difference in what feels right for each mom.



I think one way to feel happy being a sahm is to find other people to be around. This helps alleviate the loneliness often felt by being at home with the kids all the time rather than being able to be around adults at work everyday. Just visiting with another mom while your kids play can really make you feel like an adult again. And don't forget, we all work hard, we just don't get paid for it!!

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i am planning to stay at home until all of our kids are at school. i am going to be starting a bach of teaching primary (6-12yrs) next year by distance edu so i can work at a school (preferably their school) and do drop offs and pick ups, have holidays off with them etc, plus teaching is a passion of mine, and something i've always wanted to do (then again so is SAHM!). I used to teach early childhood (0-6yrs) and i think that kids should go to preschool atleast 2 days a week before school, but i did a case study on a girl in our centre, she was with us 5 days a week, her parents were drs, she got droped off at 7 when we opened and was often the last picked up before we closed at 6pm. she had been in full time care since she was 6 wrrks old, it made me so sad to think of all her parents missed out on, and how this little girl (on her 3rd centre by 4 yrs) wouold bond with the centre staff just to have them leave, or her centre changed. i never wanted that, i didn't want to be told by centre staff how my child walked or talked for the first time while i was at work, surely no job, or no amount of money is worth more then that.

Aarin - posted on 08/01/2011

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I used my Mother as a very large role model as how I wanted to raise my son. She was a SHAM until both my brother and I started school full time and then went back to work part time while we where in school.
For as long as I can remember when I talked about having kids I wanted to be home with them. Thankfully due to my husband and his career we are able to do that. I had a nice long career before we started having children so the desire to go right back to work is really not there for me. I adore staying home with our son. I know he is safe as I can make him and we do tons of fun things. I live in a very small town and with another Mom in the area have started a very busy weekly playgroup. My son and I also get to travel to see his Grandparents on a pretty regural basis too. (12 hours away). Something if I was working just would not be possible. My hubby and I have a wonderful relationship with me being at home him at work (work out of town 4 days a week). For me I wouldn't have it any other way.

Melany - posted on 08/01/2011

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I have been staying home with my 3 children for 6 1/2 years. My kids are almost 9, 6 and 4. I do plan on staying home with mine as long as possible. I think the key to being a stay at home mom is finding other friends who are also stay at home moms are at least have a child your child's age and things in common. You are an adult and need adult conversation.

The reasons I want to stay home is that my mom went back to school for her nursing degree when I was in high school. I really missed having her around since she was studying, etc. I think in high school kids act like they don't need you, but they really do. Me staying home actually helps my husband out in many ways as well. He doesn't have to worry about who is going to take off work to take care of sick kids or even who is going to take them to their well visits. . . I am able to keep the house cleaner since I stay home. . . I manage the household bills and get us fed every night. Fortunately I have a very supportive husband who appreciates what I do and wants me home with the kids. I may find a part-time job at some point that will not interfere with school activities, but for now I do plan to stay home.

Hope this helps :)

Darla - posted on 07/31/2011

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I am caught in the middle on this. I love being with my kids and knowing without a doubt I am here for them should anything happen. I also enjoy working with them in school and being able to help there too. I don't have to worry what my kids are hearing or doing under someone else's supervision or with other kids I don't know. Plus they don't get sick nearly as much as they did in daycare. That being said I also have always wanted to have a career growing up and enjoy being out in the public and dealing with adults and talking with adults ... I enjoy the flexibility it gives my family if I make an extra paycheck but the day care expenses and what my family sacrifices when I looked at going back to work didn't make sense for our family and the sacrifices that my children and us as parents were going to have do... so I stay home for how long not sure but only time will tell. Been stay at home mom for 3 + years now.

Katherine - posted on 07/31/2011

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I DON'T always want to be a SAHM. I do want to work and now I have to because I'm getting a divorce. Work was always my respite. My "me" time. Sounds crazy I know. But I've been a SAHM for 2 years on and off. Actually 2.5.

Sherri - posted on 07/31/2011

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Wow Alexandria I didn't know the millions of kids on formula were poisoned?? Where did you get this information. I am sure all the mom's that had to formula feed their children would love to hear, what it was that they actually poisoned their children with??

Nancy - posted on 07/31/2011

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We could not afford to pay daycare and I worked crazy hours as a chef, so I stay at home with my now 4 years old and I had no idea how hard it is but also how happy it makes me to know that I am raising my kids and to see them grow, I'm ok having a MNO and organizing my sons playschool (which is a parent run, co op) and I have a life and enjoy it. I also know not everybody has the guts to be a SAHM and it's easier to let somebody else raise your kids, nit my case. BTW... I'm not rich, don't have a car or family close to help me and I'm proud of myself I think it's awesome to be able to do all what I do with so little $ just for love.

Alexandria - posted on 07/31/2011

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My daughter is 2.5 and I stay home with her. I have been able to teach her so many things and was able to nurse her without pumping and storing milk, so I saved money I would have spent on formula and never had to worry that she'd be poisoned my formula. The doctors always tell me my daughter is ahead and when I tell them what I'm doing with her, they credit my decisions for her progress and health. I love that I never had to wonder how my child was being treated at some day care and that I knew she was eating healthy and not being exposed to so many colds. She has been sick 3 times in her live and they were very short lived, mild colds.

Next week my daughter is starting a Tuesday/Thursday 1-4 day care program so that I can get back in college classes. Once she gets used to the T/Th program, I plan to switch to M/W/F and then full time when she is ready for it. Now that my daughter is talking well, when I pick her up from day care, she'll be able to tell me how she was treated. I think it's time for my daughter to spend time with kids her age, the only thing I feel she's missed out on thus far. I am looking forward to being able to focus on something other than my daughter each and every day but I wouldn't change a thing I've done.

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I love being at home with my kids. I feel very blessed that my husband can support us on his income. Before we even had kids we decided that we would do what it takes for me to be home with the kids. My husband changed careers for better pay, and we live a very frugal lifestyle to make this work.

Like Kelly, when I was working, I felt that my husband and I rarely had any time together. I was a teacher and he worked long shifts (12 hours and up to 96 hours) as a paramedic. I'm very passionate about education, but any teacher can tell you that it's like having two full time jobs and the pay stinks. I couldn't see being away from my kids 10+ hours a day in order to be paid just enough to cover daycare costs, gas to work, works clothes, take out dinners, and other costs that come with working. It didn't make sense. We wouldn't come out ahead financially, and family time would tremendously suffer.

My kids are not in school yet, and I haven't decided what I'm going to do once they are in school. I'd love to have a classroom again. But I would also love to be a volunteer in my children's classrooms. When they are in school and daycare costs are not a concern, the extra money I'd make if I were to go back to work would be used for their college educations. That is also very important to me. When they are in school, we'll assess where we are financially and what our needs are as a family. But as of right now, I'm committed to being a SAHM until they are in school.

Lisa - posted on 07/29/2011

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I would always love to be a stay at home mom. But I think once all three of them are in school, I'm not quite sure what I would do with myself all day. Until my partner's job situation changes (which isn't going to happen anytime soon). I would not want to work more than part-time. We tried it and it was really hard on me. He was gone and I was exhausted. I'd have to be up by 5 a.m. to get (first two kids out the door and then being pregnant and trying to get two kids out the door) kids to daycare and myself to work by 7:30, then work until 4 and by the time I ran any errands I needed to run, picked up kids and got home it could be close to or after 6 o'clock. then I was running to get some kind of dinner on the table and then out to the barn to get chores done, and back inside to get kids bathed and cleaned up by 8 (hopefully) only to get kids in bed and spend a couple hours doing dishes, cleaning, bills, or laundry.
Even now that he's not traveling, he's still on call so 2 am phone calls to come into work are not unheard of in our household. I always felt guilty that I felt like my kids were coming home at night to visit.

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