Meg - posted on 03/08/2010 ( 12 moms have responded )
my daughter is 21months. her daddy is wonderfull in many ways and they are very close. He is a doctor and at times has to work oncall etc. Basically it comes down to the fact that since i've had a baby he has stripped me of all my independance. for example the car i used to have, it was my car and he gave it to my sister and bought me a range rover- which seems lovely but i can't afford to run it and i can't park it and it's all in his name. he wouldn't let me drive my old car with his child in as he thought it wasn't safe enough. he refuses to look after his daughter so i can work and refuses to pay for care, on top of that he has told me if i go out to work it has to be part time and if i'm earning i then have to give him money for all bills and the mortgage as it's his house and he allows me to stay.
My maths isn't brilliant but a part time job on minimum wage is unlikely to match that and cover the outgoings that a doctors wage would. if i need anything for myself i have to ask him for pocket money. he has stoped me doing the weekly shop and he does it now to be in more control of whats been bought. he tells me it's my job to be a stay at home mum and he pays me to do that with allowing me to live under his roof cost free. i worry if i have to leave and move out the villiage i won't have a car or anyway to get around amongst many other things, head starts spinning just thinking about it.
i'm really nervouse about telling him i want out as he is extreamly clever and as much as i will make it as easy as possible for him to have as much to do with our daughter as he wants i don't no that if he wanted to how successfull would he be in getting custordy as he is more financialy stable. we've been together just over 31/2 years so i have no rights to the house or anything. nore do i want them but i do want whats best for our daughter and argueing parents and a strained atmosphere is not it.