What do you wear all day?

[deleted account] ( 174 moms have responded )

My husband doesn't like the fact that I wear lounge clothes all day (like sweats, comfy pants, t-shirts). He would love it if he came home and I was in a cute dress with my hair all done. I just don't see the point in getting dressed up to stay at home. I have a 7 month old and everyday I clean and/or do laundry, dishes, cooking, baking, workouts etc. Am I the only one who doesn't feel the need to look like a beauty queen everyday?

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Melissa - posted on 12/28/2009

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No, what you are doing is perfectly normal, I wear track pants and a shirt all day most days because I have a 3 month old son and spend most of my days (until late spring coming) cleaning, doing laundry, dishes etc.. not to mention that when I was pregnant I wore loose clothing like that anyway and now it is just comfortable. I do make some effort to wear a little makeup just to look more presentable and I do dress up if we go out maybe once a week or something like that. But the men cannot expect us to dress like we are about to go out everyday.

Crysany - posted on 12/28/2009

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I go some days without getting dressed, and my husband appreciates the days I do dress up alot more.

Amanda - posted on 12/28/2009

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I do agree with your wearing makeup and doing your hair everyday, I try to but somedays it just doesn't work for me. As long as my hair and my makeup are done I feel pretty good and it appeases my husband as well.

Anna - posted on 12/28/2009

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i agree with you. i dont feel the need to dress up all nice if im staying in the house doing work, but i do try to look nice sometimes for him.

Abby - posted on 12/28/2009

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i have two girls 3 n 5, i get up n put on my make up and do my hair everyday and wear something a little respectable but comfortable, i do it for myself it makes u feel good about u. husbands dont like to see there wives let themselves go thats when they start to lose interest. try it u will feel the difference within yourself n your family

Susana - posted on 12/27/2009

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Oh girl, you are so not alone! I only get dressed on days I have to take my 4 yr old to JK, otherwise I am in loungwear or even pj's all day! What's the point in getting all dressed up to clean food off floors and run after kids all day? You'll just end up having do more laundry, and we know we all do enough of that as it is, right? Just be comfortable, and as long as you are brushing your teeth, and hair-you're good to go for the days in!

Michelle - posted on 12/27/2009

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I dress now the way I did before kids. Always comfortable but not embarrassed to go out side in what I am wearing. So normal attire is jeans and a t-shirt or sweater.

Sheryl - posted on 12/27/2009

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no i don't do it too! my husbend ask me sometimes too. so i do try to dress sometimes! but he know that it not going to be a everyday thing! cause my job is not easy and i'm sure it not easy for anyone! there days that when he get home i'm still in clothes i was in the last night. only thing is it got milk and marker! lol but hey it the job!

Christy - posted on 12/27/2009

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you are definitely not alone, and it's good to know that i'm not alone either! i only get dressed on my boyfriend's days off or if we make plans to either go out or have company when he gets home from work.maybe when our kids are older (my girl's 17 months) we will have the time and ambition for that but my daughter's so clingy right now that i have to wait until her daddy gets home to even get a shower lol.

Nicole - posted on 12/27/2009

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I have to get dressed, I can't stand to be in pj's all day, it makes me feel like I'm sick! Sometimes I'll put on my cute sweatpants that I wore while I was pregnant (they're not maternity clothes, just regular drawstrings sweats!) and a t-shirt if we're just hanging out at home. I usually take the dog and baby for a walk in the mornings and that's what I wear and I just stay in it if we're not doing anything. Otherwise I'll wear jeans and maybe a polo shirt if I have errands to run. The way I look when I go out depends on how much time I have before I have to be somewhere! It's hard to get ready in the bathroom with a one year old underfoot, unrolling toilet paper, playing with the toilet, taking stuff out of the trash, etc. Depending on how crazy my hair is, I'll either run the flat iron over it or wet it and scrunch it. Or if I'm really short on time I'll just put it up in a clip. I can "dress up" a little nicer on the weekends when we go out because my husband can watch the baby and I can get ready in peace! Not that my husband cares though! It's nice that he loves me no matter what I look like, but some acknowledgement of my effort would be appreciated! The other day I was in the bathroom getting ready and he asks "What are you doing?" I told him I was putting on makeup and he says "You still do that?". I wish my husband would put half the effort into getting dressed that I do!

Cori - posted on 12/27/2009

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maybe instead of just being in sweat pants or whatever you could try just wearing short shorts that show off your legs and maybe a tight tank top, throw a little make up on and put your hair up in a messy bun and you look cute but your still in jammies!! i do this all the time! that way im not fussing over looking good but i still look good for the mansqueeze!

Brandi - posted on 12/27/2009

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NOPE. I don't get dressed most days. I throw on some sweats or sleep pants and a tshirt NO BRA and some comfy slippers. Unless I have plans to go somewhere, why bother. I only manage a shower every other day. Some days the day just gets away from me and before I know it, it's bedtime and I'm exhausted, so i figure I'll still need a shower tomorrow and then I make EXTRA sure that I schedule a shower that day. If my hubby ever said anything i'd be like "as soon as you come home, you throw your pants off in the middle of the kitchen floor, I don't even want to hear that I should be getting dressed (let alone dressed UP). Why be all dressed up with no place to go?" I wouldn't worry about it lol

Ashley - posted on 12/27/2009

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That is what I wear! However: I do wish I didn't wear lounge clothes all of the time. But I don't see the need to get all dressed up to fingure paint with a two year old! Sometimes I do wish I had a nicer selection of what to wear. But it is totally normal!

Whitney - posted on 12/27/2009

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Guessed that I just lucked out and have never had that problem from my hubby... hes the opposite. But I do it sometime just for me. In a few month you'll start to feel yucky, like what happened to me. Well I did. Just helped me feel like a person again

Robyn - posted on 12/27/2009

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Quoting Dawn:

My husband used to feel the same way. I looked haggered from being so busy with little kids. So I started buying outfits that were comfortable but cute. Cute sweat outfits with tank tops underneath and a few belts, some cute t-shirts and jeans. Made all the difference. I just looked neat and put together. More cute hip mom than frump mom. He made comments right away. He worked in an office all day wear women are dressed to the nines. And he would come home and it would look like I put my finger in the light socket :). Target and kohls have a lot of low priced cute everyday outfits. Good luck.


Dawn! Those are great ideas! I think it is important for us to look good for our husbands, but at the same time, I also understand the want to stay in frumpy clothes (because I do). :) But I think you've found a good medium and I think it is something worth looking into. A lot of moms have mentioned that just simply getting dressed in the mornings sends that source of rejuvenation that we moms need just make it through the day with the kids, and still be able to carry into the evening after the kids go to bed. 



Thanks for your post. Definitely gave me something to think about. 

Dawn - posted on 12/27/2009

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My husband used to feel the same way. I looked haggered from being so busy with little kids. So I started buying outfits that were comfortable but cute. Cute sweat outfits with tank tops underneath and a few belts, some cute t-shirts and jeans. Made all the difference. I just looked neat and put together. More cute hip mom than frump mom. He made comments right away. He worked in an office all day wear women are dressed to the nines. And he would come home and it would look like I put my finger in the light socket :). Target and kohls have a lot of low priced cute everyday outfits. Good luck.

Robyn - posted on 12/27/2009

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I agree with everyone here. I don't understand why I should have to "get dressed" when all i'm doing is housework. If we're running errans that day, then yes, I'll make myself presentable, but the house is my office, and my office attire does not include dresses and heels... It is nice though that those days I do make an effort, and he comes home from work, he notices, and tells me I'm cute or beautiful. Other days tho, it's an automatic "What's going on? Where are you going?".....

Cassie - posted on 12/27/2009

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I wear sweats and tshirts/ hoodies all day lol. I have a 6 and 8 year old who consume most of my day. When their at school Im so busy cleaning that by the time im done its 2:30pm and I have to leave to go get them. Im lucky enough to have a husband who finds me attractive no matter what I wear. But I make sure that theres always one day a week I actually change into some jeans and a nice top, slather on some makeup and curl my hair just so "I" feel better lol. Theres nothing wrong with what your doing being a mom is your job. You dress accordingly. Thats the way I look at it. But dont forget to pamper yourself once in awhile. You deserve it!

Tandy - posted on 12/27/2009

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don't feel bad.... mother of 3 here. Ages 7, 6, and 2.... I don't really remember the last time I got dressed before 9 am and if I did it was only because I had somewhere to go. Most days I stay in comfy clothes until it is time to go get the kids from school and even then if they aren't to bad I just stay in them.

Kimberley - posted on 12/27/2009

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You are so not alone, as stated by other moms here. I guess I'm the type,and my husband knows it that it doesn't matter what I wear or how I look I'm feeling good most of the time. I'm an up person and an optimist 95% of the time. My husband loves me for me and always says I look beautiful no matter the clothes, hair or makeup. I have a 2 1/2 year old son and a 1 year old daughter. They keep me busy and messy. My daughter is weaning herself but still nurses before naps and bedtime. Comfy tees and nursing tanks are my staples for tops. Sweats, shorts, or PJ bottoms are also staples for the day. I'm lucky if I don't end up changing my shirt 2-3 times a day. I do shower daily and put on lip moisturizer.

I'm blessed to have the hubby I do. I volunteer once a week once a week on one of his days off. I get dressed nicely for this because it's like going to work. When I come home I don't expect much and that's a good thing. He's still in his PJ's and the kids have been fed and watered and played with and that's about it. I come home change clothes and get right back into the laundry, the dishes, cleaning the kitchen, etc. I think all husbands, spouses, signifcant others who go out of the house to work need a day at home with the kids so they can really understand the stay at home mom's daily grind. Plus, we don't get a break or vacation really. It is important for your relationship to have the 'date' night whether you go out or stay home and have a late meal after the kids are in bed. Get back to you and your relationship, make sure to communicate about the change in needs and expectations. These do change once a new addition is added to the family.

Coni - posted on 12/27/2009

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I just make sure I'm looking good by the time he gets home....How is he supposed to know what I actually looked like all day? Then he thinks your like a super mom or something :)

Sarah - posted on 12/27/2009

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You will catch me wearing makeup MAYBE once a week. And wearing anything but sweat pants and a T-shirt? Same thing... about once a week. I agree with Nikki... our job is messy and way too busy to dress up for!

Here's a question for you... does your hubby shave his face and get dressed up nice every day (if he's not an office man)? Than he shouldn't expect you to dress up all the time either.

Now if you guys are planning an evening together... at home or otherwise... I think it would be a nice guesture to dress up for him (a little), just to make you feel sexier and for him to enjoy. :)

Christina - posted on 12/27/2009

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I did read at least one other post that sounds like me. If I do not get dressed, i.e. in jeans and even a t-shirt I get less done. I am not saying that others are like this but for me it rings true. I feel better about myself if I get dressed, brush my hair and apply a bit of makeup. It may sound stupid but it is what gets me going and keeps me going through the day. There are def days when I stay in my pajama's but nothing gets done. I homeschool and I am starting to notice my girls don't want to get dressed. I want them to so I will.

Kacey - posted on 12/27/2009

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i stay in pj's all day lol! that way when i do doll my self up he likes it more x

Brooke - posted on 12/27/2009

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yeah, if he worked at a construction site, you wouldn't expect him to come home dressed in a suit & tie, but once in a while you should make an effort to look especially nice of course. still, he shouldn't demand it every day - that's ridiculous.

Maritza - posted on 12/27/2009

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LOL! Tell him that those type of wives are now gone with their era, the 50's!! My husband is like that. I do it once a week, to please him, but other than that, I wear my lounge clothes all the time as well. I can't worry about being pretty when I have a house to clean, food to cook, and an infant to take care of.

Aimee - posted on 12/27/2009

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A friend of mine once said, "I believe that women should always look their best." Of course she works in the corporate world but swears that when she's at home, she still gets out of bed, showers, buts on something nice, does her hair and make-up. Now, I ask you, who is she doing it for? If you feel better dressing up and looking nice you should do it. If it doesn't make you feel better or puts you out, don't. Personally, I do try not to look like a complete slob when my husband comes home. I want him to be excited about what he comes home to after working all day and he always looks nice when he comes home. I think it's worth the effort. On days when we are both home all day, yes we are both slouches and we love it.

Jamey - posted on 12/27/2009

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I wouldn't go all out but if you know that he'll be home at the same time every day, it would be a nice gesture to him to make yourself look pretty. I'm not saying get all dressed up but at least don't look like you have been lounging all day. I don't worry too much about what I'm wearing but I am always showered, dressed, and have the house straightened up by the time my husband comes home. It is the least I could do for him, for all he does to allow me to be at home with our children.

Sarah - posted on 12/26/2009

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nope i do the same thing...i dont dress up unless im going some where or if someone is coming here i dont see the point to get all fancy to clean the house.. idk just the way i am i guess.

Kimberley - posted on 12/26/2009

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Not sure what your hair and makeup are like but maybe just a touchup on the hair and makeup would be helpful. I don't wear makeup like I used to so its helpful for me, esp lipstick.

Jade - posted on 12/26/2009

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I have a two year old and newborn twins and even tho my husband tells me he loves me no matter what i just cant stand what i look like without makeup and at least jeans on. I usually wear comfy shirts i can easily nurse the twins in but i still make a point of looking presentable in case i have to go out suddenly or answer the door for someone.

Susan - posted on 12/26/2009

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i suggest getting dressed up from time to time, even if you are at home. my son is now three, but for the first year, i would start in sweats and t-shirts and that soon became PJs.
I would go from doing my hair, to just brushing my hair, to putting it up in a clip without even brushing it.
It got real bad for me. My husband eventually had to say something. It was so gradual that i didn't notice. I thought "I'm home all day doing dishes and changing diapers, why dress?" Now i make it a point to at least get jeans on instead of sweat pants, just as if i were going to work. Maybe not makeup and that whole deal, but real clothes and hair done.

Lamiae - posted on 12/26/2009

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believe you are not alone. sometimes when i look at my self in the mirror I start laughing because I look like crap. My husband does not like it, but what am i supposed to do? between the cooking, cleaning and taking care of my baby, I don't have time to wear nice clothes or wear make up .. he got used to it..

Stevie - posted on 12/26/2009

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nope i dont even bother i wear my pjs most all day unless i go out like you said whats the point that will just add extra laundry to do that doesnt need to be done you know i do miss alot getting up and taking a shower and getting dressed but back in those days i was a size 4 and had classes and stuff to do now im a stay at home mom and married and im done with college and all of that stuff i like being able to relax and not have to be hot cuz im looking for that guy and all that lol dont frett it maybe do it for him once a week if he is really all that annoyed with it

Beth - posted on 12/26/2009

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I only wear clothing that I am able to feed my baby in easily. I see no point in putting on a shirt that is only going to get stretched out by pulling it up every three hours, so tank tops and sweats are what I find most comfortable and to make the most sense. I do put on make-up and do my hair every morning though...

Amanda - posted on 12/26/2009

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I do tend to wear pj's or sweat pants most of the time but ocassionally when he comes home I do have on better clothes. I also try to get most of my cleaning done in the morning that way by the time he comes home I look somewhat like I used to when we were dating

Jane - posted on 12/26/2009

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tell your husband to get his head out of the clouds. it's just not manageable.
then tell him to hire a babysitter, send you to the salon, make dinner reservations and take you to dinner. this way you can both feel good. (sounds like he feels neglected, but then again, it's normal w/a new child.)

Michelle - posted on 12/26/2009

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Quoting Jaelyn:
. My hubby loves me just as I am and I would rather not attract any other unwanted attention. At least thats the excuse I tell myself to stay comfy! :) Once in a while I do get all fixed up JUST FOR my hubby, not because we are going out, just to let him he is important to me, but that is not often, maybe once a month.



You make a verygood point here-- Sometimes when you're all dressed up and cute lookin other guys take it the wrong way and let's face it-- it's a pain to deal with sometimes!! It's not terribly good for your self esteem to know that a huge group of guys walked by you without even noticing you lol but my fiance's the only guy who really matters to me, and he thinks I'm gorgeous no matter what! Unwanted attention, especially since it usually happens in front of your children, is better off discouraged. Ooooooh it steams me with guys hit on me while I've got my son with me....

Michelle - posted on 12/26/2009

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Sara, I have a 19 month old, and I usually wear PJ's.... I mean, I put on clothes if I'm going somewhere, obviously, and occasionally I like to get dressed, but I do usually just wear sweats. It's more just more practical and comfortable with all of the up and down and up and down of playing with a small child and cleaning all day. Plus, it's a waste of cute outfits!! lol... I'm right there with ya-- sweats are the best. Tell your husband it could be worse-- think hair rollers and housecoats and a glass of gin and cigarette with the baby on your hip :-D

Lisa - posted on 12/26/2009

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um....while my husband thinks I'm beautiful even without makeup and my hair all messy and in my pjs, I prefer to look human. lol. For me, I don't feel like I'm actually ready for the day unless I'm dressed. That means a shower and do my hair and makeup and wearing clothes not jammies. I have always been this way though--granted I only wear jeans and a t-shirt, but I think looking nice makes me feel nice. of course right at this moment in time, I'm wearing jammy bottoms because I'm over-due and I don't want to wear pants..but I'll put on my jeans when my husband gets off work.
I feel more active and more ready to be sociable when I'm dressed--who wants to open the door to the mail man when wearing sweats? lol.
my husband doesn't even notice what I wear, once I dressed up all pretty and was looking good I'd say, and he never said anything all day, then when I went in and washed my face and put on my pjs, and came out and said good night, he said "oh you are so pretty" I think I punched him then. lol.

Toni - posted on 12/26/2009

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PJ's!!! i wake up every morning and take off my sleeping pj's and put on my awake pjs... why would i wear anything else? my husband deals. w/o complaint. wouldnt matter if he did. i am a beauty queen .... when i want to be.

Lulu - posted on 12/26/2009

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I stay at home all day also, but one thing I noticed was that I started to stay in pajamas all day or exercise pants and a t-shirt, etc. and not only did I looked awful, I started to gain wait because lets face it loose clothing makes you unaware of your weight, so I decided to at least wear jeans and a t-shirt, wear some mousturizer, lip gloss and brush my hair. Makes a world of difference.

Debi - posted on 12/26/2009

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I run around in my sweats and exercise clothes most of the day and dress before he comes home! Helps me to feel human again lol!

Cori - posted on 12/26/2009

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PJ's are the way to go... but my husband love it when i wear pajmas all day!

Stacey - posted on 12/26/2009

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No hun im exactly the same part from some days i will have a lazy day and stay in my jamys all day lol but to be hones iv always worn baggy lounge around clothes everyday (im abit of a chav) so i normaly waire trackis and t-shirt the only time i will get dressed up is when i go some where nice with my family or friends.
My partner isnt realy bothered what i waire aslong as i feel comfy lol.
xxxx

Paula - posted on 12/26/2009

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since it's important to your husband that you look like you care about what he thinks, then learn to find an attractive compromise. Like wear a sweatshirt material dress with leggins or sweat pants underneath. This is casual, comfortable , warm and neat looking. Oftentimes I will use my apron, which looks like a dress, over my pants. I had 3 young ones at home as a stay at home Mom and I would purposefully get up, shower, put make up on and fix my hair. It gives you a feeling of being prepared for anyone and anything you might end of doing or meeting unexpectedly during the day.

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