Bria - posted on 07/31/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )
Me and my husband will be married 3yrs come Sept, we had 2 kids in 2 years. I have a 18 month old son an a 7 weeks old daughter. He's military so he works alot but I would like if he helped around the house sometime. I cook, clean, take care the kids, wash cloths(by hand cause we don't have a washer and dryer and our car is down right now) I go to school oh and babysitt to try to pull some of the weight of bills and by the end of the day I am pooped. If any of you have a newborn or have had one you know that you can't get much done with them. First let me start by saying our son was planned our daughter was not and honestly if I had the money for and abortion I would have gotten it I told him plan out I didn't want anymore kids with him. Why? When I was pregnant with our son he went awol for 8 mons........No he didn't run off he was here ALLLLLLL DAMMMMMNNNN DAY ask me how many doctors appointments he went to (3) he went to 3 appointments the whole nine months so after I had my son I told him I was done I didn't want to go through that again alone then when my son turned 8mons I found out I was pregnant again so once again I did it alone but not on purpose this time cause he got depolyed when I was 4 mons along. My issue now is I can't get this lazy bastard to do shit around the house NOTHING AT ALL and when I do it all and then express that I'm tired his response is " tired from what??" REALLY!!!!! I have put up with all his shit he's had a number of online affairs but he says "its not cheating cause I never meet or slept with them" I feel it is I think anything that you have to hide from your spouse is cheating period. I cant even get him to spend time with me I have tried to even get into the things he like (video games) I've tried to even get into the movies he likes but nothing works so fed up I asked him the other night "You really just dont want to spend time with me, do you?" He stared at me with no response the look on his told it all that "hell naw look but Im not going to say it cause I dont wanna hurt your feelings". When I try to talk to him about things he blows an says" this again" I'm 25 yrs old an the only reason Im still here is because I really honor my vows and because everytime I talk to his parents they thank me for being here with him and sticking it out but I'm at my breaking point I feel like if I gotta do it all anyway what the hell is he here for. I give him money to go to the store and buy cigerettes and he not only buys them but sneaks off to gamestop and spends the rest on games. It wouldnt be a problem if we had extra money but because he went AWOL he got demoted so he's not making that much and with 2 small children money is funny, I'm reusing some of my sons old cloths for my daughter cause we don't have enough to buy her new stuff and pay bills. He sits in his room and plays video games all day. There was a time we ate dinner together watched tv and even slept together now he eats in his game room and me and the kids eat in the living room he sleeps in his game room and I sleep in the living room with our daughter and its been like this for a little over a year. I think I deserve better I love my husband but I don't know how long I can go on like this. Everything I do is wrong or weirded to him because "his mama" does it different, I dont go no where unless its the grocery store, or dollar store. When I asked him to spend time with me he told me that part should be over we been maried 3yrs and everytime I talk about leaveing him he tells me I just wanna do what I wanna do and I cant do that here so thats why I wanna leave. I have one bad habit that some men may have a problem with and that is I smoke weed but I have to or I'd be in somebody mental health hospital right now but he drinks like uh fish I mean will scrape change together to get a beer he doesn't see me smoke but he knows I do it even when I tell him I don't . I just want to be happy and my kids love their daddy so when is enough enough?