Who cleans the childrens room?

Crystal - posted on 10/11/2011 ( 106 moms have responded )

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As a SAHM is it my responsiblity to always keep my daughters' room clean? They are 10 and 7 is this to young to expect a clean room from them? I try and make things simply by having things organized, such as one basket for school clothes and another for regular clothes. A small toy chest in the room for frequently played with toys and one in the closet for things that hardly get played with. Yet everything ends up on the floor!! I want to teach them to help out but how much is to much to ask for! Thanks ahead of time for any advice.(P.S I also have a 6 month old)

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Shannon - posted on 10/19/2011

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You should set a timer for 5 minutes before bed and have them do a "quick clean". Kids love to race so see who can clean the most in 5 min. If they know where things go and their rooms are not cluttered.

Jessica - posted on 10/11/2011

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I have a 6 yr old and 7 yr old. They have been taught since 2 to pick up their toys and dirty clothes. At 6 & 7 they make their own beds, swiffer their room, put their laundry away and help me with the dusting. ( I take care of mopping, deep cleaning etc) My daughter (6 yr old) was giving me a hard time with keeping her toys cleaned up. So one day I walked into her room, picke dup everything that was on the floor laying where it didnt belong, put it in a garabe bag and gave it away. She was shocked but she learned right way that mom means business. I never had to do that again and she always cleans up as soon as I tell her to.

Annie - posted on 10/11/2011

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Perhaps make them take turns at cleaning their room, then the messy one might not be so messy by having to clean the room by herself!!

Annie - posted on 10/11/2011

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I believe that you need to teach your kids to pick up after themselves by about 2yrs old so I think your kids are old enough to be cleaning their rooms and even doing some chores. This is just my opinion and how I raised my 2 oldest kids now 21 & 23. I have a 10 month at home now also

Rita - posted on 11/01/2011

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just to add...i think kids should do chores without payment/rewards like toys and prizes b/c they live in the house. mom isn't the maid...everyone who lives in the house should do their part to keep it clean.

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Heather - posted on 11/25/2011

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my daughters are 6 an 8 and they clean their own room.. if they need help with something than i will help but other than that i dont do it. an my sons are 3 and 10 and i help somewhat cause my 3 year old needs help

Joanne - posted on 11/25/2011

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The sooner you train them, the better. As they grow older, then you expect them to do more and better. Kids are smarter and more capable of doing things a lot sooner than most people think. When they start crawling you can teach them how to put their toys away (make a game out of it). By the time they start walking they can do that even better. Your kids (10 and 7) are very much capable of keeping their rooms tidy. You'll just need to go in every now and then and do some spring cleaning (getting rid of un-needed items, washing walls--they can help). Also, at least once a month, have them watch you inspect their rooms so that they know exactly what you expect of them (for example: pushing stuff up under the bed and stuffing the closet is unaccceptable). If your children refuse to comply, take away some privelages (no video games until they do what you expect them to do). Sometimes this process may take a while because your kids may not take you serious at first. I've had to take away privelages for as long as a month until they got the point. My kids are 13 and 15 and periodically I still have to get on them because they get too comfortable (I rarely check their rooms now). I tell my kids that their rooms are not clean until it is clean to my satisfaction. Now, when my daughter cleans her room, she'll come ask me to inspect her room and she even quotes me about her room being clean to my satisfaction (that tickles me pink). She does that mostly when she wants to go somewhere. Currently, I'm working on getting my kids to keep their rooms clean to the point where its clean before they go to bed and before they leave to go to school. I even emphasize that they can't expect to have company if they don't keep their rooms clean.

Jodie - posted on 11/25/2011

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My children are 9 and 6 and if they have a messy room then they have to live with it because, even though I will help if they ask for it, they have to keep their own room tidy.

Candhl - posted on 11/22/2011

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My son is 5 and he has been picking his toys up for about a year now. At this age all I have to do is ask him to please clean his toys up and he does it. One thing that does help is that I keep his room pretty clutter free and there are not tons of toys in it. If the room is packed with toys it becomes overwhelming for a younger child to clean up. I keep one large sized crate with his trucks/tractors/etc of his choice in his room and he has a bookshelf that holds a few other toys, his dvd case,and dvd player/hd box. The only other thing he has in his room is a toddler couch and big remote control firetruck. I do the actual cleaning but he keeps it tidy. He also has chores around the house and does help out when I ask. I have him do things like pick up shoes and put them on the shoe shelf,pick up trash around the house, put dishes in the sink, take the laundry out of the dryer and put it in a basket and on my bed. Simple things like that make a HUGE difference in my day and teaches him he isnt allowed to be lazy.

Ange - posted on 11/22/2011

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I have a 7 year old and a 16 month old and my 7 year old daughter will clean her room and organize it too now.... we start teaching her to clean and organize when she was 4 and a half and at that age she would through all her toys into the closet and called it cleaned but heck it was a start and she learned from there on how to do it and as time goes on she will put thing in certain places so she knows where they are... and the only thing left for me is the vacuuming

Angel - posted on 11/21/2011

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I have 3 daughters a 15 year old, 12 yr old and 9 yr old. I have always went behind them and picked up all there messes but about year ago I started to realize that in doing that I was hurting them more than helping them So I began to ask them everynight to pick up the messes they made. I knew they would not put them back in the organized way that I kept them so I decided that 1 time a week I would go into their rooms and clean it the way it should be. I have always went through their rooms dusting and cleaning the walls once a week so that would now be my major cleaning day

Baylie - posted on 11/21/2011

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My family goes by the motto 'do your best, that's all you can do' My kids 3 & 4 tidy their own rooms the best they can. They love to vaccuum as well, they make their beds. I'll go inspect it and help with whatever they need, they do it on their own everyday. They know it's their chore for the day. They put their clothes in the wash as well and they even sort them whites, from colored and towels they are pretty awesome kids :)

Baylie - posted on 11/21/2011

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My family goes by the motto 'do your best, that's all you can do' My kids 3 & 4 tidy their own rooms the best they can. They love to vaccuum as well, they make their beds. I'll go inspect it and help with whatever they need, they do it on their own everyday. They know it's their chore for the day. They put their clothes in the wash as well and they even sort them whites, from colored and towels they are pretty awesome kids :)

Michelle - posted on 11/15/2011

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I used to tidy my eldest 2 daughter's room - they are aged 9 and 6 - but now I think, if they're old enough to make the mess they are old enough to clear it up. However, I ask them to tidy their room but I don't nag them about it. My rule is, if their bedroom isn't tidy then they can't have friends come around.

Wynter - posted on 11/14/2011

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Definitely not too young. My Children are 3 and 1 (almost 2) and they clean up after themselves when they play with their toys or else I take the toys away. They also know how to make their own beds as well. I also by the age of 9 was doing my own laundry and doing household chores. My Children will also be taught the same thing. But maybe not the laundry because I love doing laundry, it's my time, haha. But no, definitely not too young to expect them to start cleaning up their own rooms.

Dane' - posted on 11/14/2011

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mommy me of course lol. it has to be my way no dads way or i have to go in there and re do it lol. but its funny sometimes to just watch him do it and laugh behind his back be he tryed lol

Saria - posted on 11/12/2011

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My 3 yr old picks up her own room. My 9 month old is not walking yet but as soon as she is I will expect her to start learning when u play with something and are done with it put it away before you move on to another toy. It's how I did it with my 3 year old and it worked wonders. My oldest is not allowed to play with another toy till she puts the first one she had out away.

Chelese - posted on 11/12/2011

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My oldest son is 8 and youngest will be 1 in 2 weeks and I constatnly tell Kaden my oldest to clean up his room. He likes helping out with the laundry folding up the clothes and other stuff around the house but when it comes to his room thats another story. My husband feels like he's not old enough to keep it spic and span. And I say no I'll do that but if its something he takes out to play with why can't he put it back? That goes for juice food or anything else. If its take out put it back or throw it away. These values have to be taught early because if they are not then the harder it will be when they get older. And I know when I was Kaden's age I had to do more than just clean up my room I helped out with house hold chores. I was given an allowance also so that was a great motivator. It wasn't a lot but It sure got me to cleaning up quick! :-)

Alex - posted on 11/10/2011

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I started my daughter young. At age six she now keeps her room perfectly clean, does her own laundry, takes care of her own dishes, and from time to time offers to clean the ktichen and bathroom, not because she's made to, but because I've raised her to know it's right. You can teach your kids too.

Katherine - posted on 11/08/2011

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hello Crystal
My kids are 9,5 and 4 months old. I have always told my kids since they were able to walk and pick up toys to put the back. That doesnt always work when they rather continue making more messes and leave the rest for you to do. What I had to do is clean out thier rooms of nothing but thier beds dressers and misc stuff. All toys and fun stuff had to be removed to another room "play area or play room." We also have the spare tv / vcr/dvd player in there. So if they dont get their toys cleaned up before dinner time I remove the cords that connect the tv and dvd player and they loose movie time plus they can not play with the toys for a week. and if alll else fails i remove all toys from the house and out to the shed or trashcan. So far it has worked by using the tv to get them to clean up.

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My kids have been cleaning up their own rooms since they could walk. I have raised the bar as they get older. Initially I was happy with just tossing into something. Now they are 6 they can sort their toys out. Since they tend to hoard I do a monthly cleaning which mainly consists of me throwing out junk.

Megan - posted on 11/01/2011

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I have a 9,6, and 5 year old, and they all each have chores. My son is 5, he cleans the table and cleans his room AND makes his bed every morning, MY girls have to clean rooms, make beds, my oldest puts up the dishes and my middle sweeps. It's the only way to teach them things in life.

Juleen - posted on 11/01/2011

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I have 2 boys aged 11 & 5 and they share a room so every sat morning when they don't have school i send them up to tidy their room. They both make their beds every morning but they generally leave all their toys all over the place. So on Sat morning they go up & generally the 11 year old is grand he tidys up his toys no problem but the 5 year old has gone through stages where he won't so I generally won't let him out to play until he does which generally works for him. I do however go up myself bout once a month & give it a really good clean up but if they don't clean up their toys when I ask I get rid of them. They need to have respect for their room & their toys.

Stifler's - posted on 11/01/2011

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I agree with Rita. Who is going to give them a medal for doing the dishes when they're a stay at home mum. Housework is a necessary evil.

Rita - posted on 11/01/2011

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I started teaching my girls, ages 4 & 5 (who also share a room), to pick up after themselves when they were toddlers and started expecting them to pick up after themselves with little supervision by age 4. It helped when I would have them pick up their room prior to lunch or a snack, so it worked like a reward but wasn't a blatant reward -- they knew they couldn't have their snack until their room was cleaned up. I have one daughter who is much less inclined than the other to do her fair share, so I also split the room in half, and have each do their own half. That way, there isn't one kid doing most of the work.

Lexi - posted on 11/01/2011

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I would definintely say they are old enough to be expected to clean up after themselves. You are their mom not their slave hun! My two year old isn't capable of doing cleaning by himself yet, but I expect him to help me put away his toys before bed every night. He loves helping me wash windows, sweep and vacuum. We make a game of it. He does the lower windows all by himself now and I just have to wipe the little spots he misses. I think it starts good habits for the rest of life to be responsible for chores. By the time I was 5 I was already expected to help muck out my horses stall, rake the leaves in the yard, take the trash out, stuff like that. I don't have any older kids so I can't speak from experience there, but I think if you started with small tasks in their room and worked your way up to them being expected to clean the whole thing it would work out just fine. I imagine if you told them right now to clean it themselves when they've never had to before they'd throw a fit. At least I know the 6 year old I baby sit would, since he's used to his mom or the cleaning lady doing it for him. Good luck and congrats on the new little one!

Zee - posted on 11/01/2011

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This is a tough one. They are certainly capable of tidying their rooms up they just don't want to. I don't think as a SAHM that we should have to do it all.

Problem is we're so busy as a family what with homework everyday, tutoring 3 x week that by the time we make it upstairs and see the mess in their rooms, I'm done for the day and not prepared to start getting after them to clean their rooms. This is why one day on the weekend, we institute a "lets get tidy for the next week" plan.

It never goes without some tears or us getting frustrated though because my oldest loves to set up "homes" for all her little toys all over her room but never wants to put it away after all the work she has put in to setting it up. Even if it might not get played with for another two weeks. So some compromises have to be made.

They say that a messy house shows happy children and that children actually thrive on some level ( I can't remember if it's mentally, creatively, academically or what) but I don't. The mess elevates my stress. So I think there has to be a happy medium.

Nicole - posted on 10/31/2011

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No. My daughter is five, and she picks up her own room after school. On the weekends, it's after her homework.I have a rule in my home. If she can make the mess, she can clean it up. We had some trouble with legos being left out on the floor, so it's like it was in my mother's house. If I have to clean up toys, they go into a bag for the Salvation Army or garbage for legos.

Cassandra - posted on 10/31/2011

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My son has cleaned his room since he started walking :)) You should definitely have them cleaning their rooms. If you dont, who knows they may always expect you to do so!

Sarah - posted on 10/28/2011

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Well they put it in the floor like that because they know that you will clean it my children are 8,5,3,and 6 months and my 5,8 year old clean their own room so does my three year olds make them clean their own rooms and stick with it and if they dont take thongs away from them! hope this helped!!

Jessica - posted on 10/25/2011

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My 2yo and 4yo girls share a room, and they can clean up their room by themselves. Of course I have to stay on top of them and constantly remind them that there is no TV, coloring, outside, or whatever else it is that I feel like we could do that day, until the room is ready for me to vacuum. They have a large wall-to-wall double closet and the along the entire length I have those wire bins. Everything goes in them. Balls have one, dolls and accessories have another, stuffed animals have two, musical toys and laptops have two, Hello Kitty stuff has a bin, and two bins have the cloth baskets for small toys. LPS in one and Barbie in the other. They do not have to lift any lids, everything is very accessible for them, and it just works for us. I tried to make it as easy as possible for them to be able to clean it on their own.

Kacey - posted on 10/25/2011

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No it is not too young to expect a clean room. When my daughter was 2, I started showing her how to pick up her toys and put them into the toy box. You need to teach them organization, but in small simply ways. You can't just tell them to do it..you have to get down on the floor and clean up the room with them. They learn from you. If they don't do it, just take their toys away. It sounds harsh, but they'll get the point. :)

Lisa - posted on 10/25/2011

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NOOOOO!!!! If she doesn't learn to pick up after herself NOW..... she never will. You have your own stuff to keep track of.

Belinda - posted on 10/24/2011

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I don't think it's your responsibility. Your children are old enough to clean up after themselves, you just have to teach them to do so and be firm in requiring it of them. My boys are 3 and 23 months and they clean their room. I assist them, but they do the majority of the work. So your 10 and 7 year olds can definitely handle cleaning up behind themselves.

Tana - posted on 10/23/2011

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I started teaching my kids to help from the time they could walk. Even if I helped them pick toys up with their own hand to put in toy box. I definitely agree with Annie Kolb they are old enough to clean their own room and help with chores as well. Just cause you are SAHM doesn't mean EVERYTHING is your job!

Shruti - posted on 10/23/2011

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HI, Its definately not to early, esp for the 10 year old. Initially they start out helping you and then it shoudl be you helping them..just being there to teach organising stuff...At10 I had my older son vaccuming and help load the dishwasher..putting away his own clothes after i fold them..younger ones follow suit..

Courtney - posted on 10/22/2011

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My daughter is 19months old and she already knows how to pick up her own room. I don't expect too much due to her age, but she knows where her toys go and that her pillow and blanket go on her bed and that her clothes go in her dresser. I help her, but she gets so excited if she does it by herself.

Carly - posted on 10/22/2011

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My 7yo and 4yo clean all the messes they make and are capable of cleaning up. Period. They put most of thier own clothes away (can't reach the stuff that is hung up), clear the table, clean up thier school supplies since they are homeschooled, clean up spills, get thier room ready to vacuum, pick up all thier toys, and even help sweep and vacuum. Right now my oldest helps fold laundry and the 4yo helps match socks. Is it to my standards? Not by a long shot. Does it take half the day to get a simple task done? Sometimes. Do I have to go in and inspect to see what they missed? Oh yeah. However they are learing the skill to use later in life. And when it's time to purge they know what they want to keep and what they are just tired of picking up.
My advice is take the time to teach them how to do it right if it's something new like making thier beds and do it with them a few times to see how well they do, ensure they are doing it properly, and what you can expect from each one. Good luck.

Christina - posted on 10/20/2011

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my son is three he is responsible for keeping his room clean the few "toys" off the floor... there are no toys really in his room just books and stuffed animals.. the play room he also needs to keep clean we manage that by constantly reminding him to put away something when he is done with it before pulling out something new i understand sometimes its fun to play with dinos and cars so i have a 3 bin rule no reason to dump every bin of toys we have out.... good luck

Christina - posted on 10/20/2011

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My children are 2 and 4 and they clean the room themselves. I made up a clean up song and whenever I start singing it they spring into action. These also clean up the living room every evening. At meal times when they are finished they put their plates in the sink, of course the 2 year old only uses plastic plates. They are good little cleaners. My daughter helps me vacuum and my son tries to sweep the kitchen floor. They get very excited that they can help.

Erin - posted on 10/19/2011

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My daughter is 3.5 and she is 100% responsible for cleaning her room and putting her laundry away. She even vacuums it(her fav part) with my cordless shark sweeper! Of course when I am vacuuming the rest of that level or dusting I get the spots she can't reach but she typically does a great job.

Catherine - posted on 10/19/2011

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My 2 year old cleans his room every day with minimal guidance from us. A 10 and 7 year old should be cleaning their own rooms.

Sharlene - posted on 10/19/2011

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But your not teaching them responablity by cleaning there room. If they make a mess they should clean the mess they did thats teaching them responablity.respect and they learn to appreciate the belongings.7 yrs old should be learing to clean there rooms thats not to young

Casey - posted on 10/19/2011

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I also think that its about being careful and respectful of their possessions, and about them being respectful of you. If my daughter says to me 'ooohhh!" when I ask her to tidy I just say Who made the mess? Why is it Mummys job to clean up a mess that you just made? Does mummy ask you to make her bed or tidy her room? (to which she usually laughs and says noooo!!) And gets onto it. And she's proud of what she has accomplished, and to be honest, its never such a horrific mess that its not easily managed by her. :)

Julia Bailey - posted on 10/19/2011

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i think that you should clean your childrens room but start slowly teaching them to clean it themselves. i think its very noraml for a mother to clean her childrens bedrooms. my oldest child is 7 years and i clean his room reguarly because its always a mess. i am always teaching him that when hes done with one thing put it away. sometimes he will do that but usually he doesnt! i dont really mind cleaning his room.

Donna - posted on 10/19/2011

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not unreasonable at all. one time i told my 6 yr olds that i was going to buy them both a new doll each for picking up their room w/o me asking, and they went and re cleaned, plus made their beds lol

Kristel - posted on 10/18/2011

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My daughter is almost two and picks up as well as likes to help with chores. She also picks up after her father, and picks up after others. When we go to the Dr.s office or someone else's house she cleans up after herself and others too. She has been cleaning for a while now, but if I do the cleaning and don't let her help she won't clean later. I insist that she cleans because she is helping Mommy, she even likes to clean the windows and dust, which is nice because I am 8 months pregnant and she gets places it is harder for me to get to. I am not doing Child labor, she just likes to help out even if it's throwing the little block of dishwashing detergent in the Dishwasher, she then wants to help more because she knows I appreciate her help and that she is just as important as Mommy when it comes to things being done around the house. My mother NEVER taught us to clean and never cleaned the house so I find raising my child to clean and organize is very important.

Janine - posted on 10/18/2011

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By the time your children are 7 and 10.. they are more than able to atleast clean their own room. I have started my youngest children doing this and they are almost 4. I still have to clean occasionally but make them help me out. As like you, we have certain spots for things to make putting away easier. With a 6 mth old I am sure you have much responsibilty apart from raising the children. You could try to make a game of it for the children, a rewards chart, pocket money if they need some encouragement. Their are certain jobs I prefer to do as I do them my own way lol... but a bedroom is definately their place to start cleaning and giving mum a hand. Sounds like you have made it very easy for them but they are just lazy. Believe me, i have one that is lazy and builds "nests" of rubbish in the corners of her room, drives my insane, she is 9. You are definately on the right path, you only need to enforce it. Make boundries and rule with a loving hand of discapline. They will clue on quick enoufgh if you stick to your guns!! Best of luck x

Casey - posted on 10/18/2011

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Whatever mess my daughter makes she cleans up! i make her bed, and she does everything else and is good at it! Ash is 6.5 years old and has been doing this herself for a year :)

Jenna - posted on 10/18/2011

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My kids keep their room clean. Four of my five kids share one room (it is a room that probably could have been a loft, but the builder built it as a huge room). They are 8, 7, 5, and 3. They are expected to put all their toys away every evening as part of their nightly routine. On Saturdays, we deep clean--they make sure everything is put away properly into the correct bins and drawers--and then we vacuum (one of them vacuums). Anything that is still out when the vacuum comes out gets taken away for one month.



And my kids are also expected to make their beds every morning, even the three-year-old can do it, and put their own clean laundry away and their own dirty laundry in the correct hampers (one for colors, one for whites). The older two also help out folding the laundry when it is clean. They also vacuum (the older two take turns, the others aren't big enough to push the vacuum yet).



Ten and seven are definitely old enough to have the responsibility of keeping their own rooms clean and orderly.

Katey - posted on 10/18/2011

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I am also a SAHM, and my daughter is 17 months old. She cleans her room. If I tell her to put her toys up and point where they go. She will pick 1 toy up at a time and put it where it goes. You have to start them at an early age, or you will be the one always cleaning their room. And you have enough to do around the house to worry about the other kids room, when they are of age to know how to clean their room.

Sharlene - posted on 10/17/2011

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Sorry 1 last thing we also do a room check morning and nite to see if they packed all there toys away. 7 and 10 is not to young to be telling ot clean ther rooms if they make the mess they can tidy the best I hope this helps !!!!!!!!!!

Sharlene - posted on 10/17/2011

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sORRY SPELLING MISTAKE THE HAREDER 1 IS PMAKE THEM PICK UP THERE TOYS PUT THEM IN A BASKET DRIVE THEM TO A CHARTY SHOP AND MAKE THEM TAKE IT TO THE COUNTER GOODLUCK

Sharlene - posted on 10/17/2011

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HI MY CHILDREN AGERS ARE 8AND 7 YR OLD HUBBIE AND I SAY IF THEY MAKE A MESS IN THERE ROOM THEY TO CLEAN OR WE PRETENT TO GET A GARBAGE BAG AND THROW THERE TOYS OUT THAT REALLYS BELIEVE ME OR THE HARDER IS TO BRIBE TO TAKING THERE THERE TOY TO A CHARITY SHOP THAT REALLY HURTS THEM.I HOPE THIS HELPS ALL THE BEST DARLS

Kayla - posted on 10/17/2011

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My son will be 17 months old in a few days and he cleans up after himself and even us. (mama and daddy) He watches me and now he trys to do it before I even get the chance. Then when he's done he claps for himself knowing he did a good job. :))) He of course still needs some help but whatever he can do he does. He's too cute!

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