discipline

Heather - posted on 12/11/2009

I discipline my daughter when her behavior requires it...time out, take away tv, spanking, etc. The problem is that my husband doesn't allow me to discipline my 2 stepkids, which would be fine he if would do it but he doesn't. If they were my kids their behavior would definitely be dealt with. He allows them to disrespect him almost daily. He also lets it slide when they disrespect me. When I have tried to take away tv or phone priveleges he doesn't back me up on it. If I touch them in any way my SD says I'm abusing them. The day is coming when my 3 year old will realize that there are different rules and consequences for her than for them. Then what?

Julie - posted on 12/03/2009

I show absolutely no difference between my own daughter, my step-sons, my grandson, or my daycare kids! All children need direction, guidance, and sometimes correction! Make sure you and your husband are on the same page with regards to discipline so that you are a united front with ALL of the children. If your discipline is born out of respect and love instead of anger and frustration, you will always do the right thing! Clearly defined expectations and consequences for disobeying the rules usually resolves any sort of conflict.

Michelle - posted on 12/02/2009

It's your house with your rules. I WILL NOT apply their mothers rules in my house, for the simple reason, there aren't any!
Authority born of love will give you obedience out of love.
Maybe I'm just old fashioned , but nothing beats a hiding. BUT they need to know the difference between a proper hiding and just a whack on the bum. Soon , you can just ask , "Do you want a hiding ?" They'll know exactly what you're talking about and stop their bad behaviour.
Ignoring doesn't help !
If you're in a public place other people get inconvenienced because you're ignoring your misbehaving child. Sort the child out and let him / her know it's unacceptable.
Also , the child's room should be a place of safety and comfort. If your way of handling bad behaviour is time out , it should be in a neutral place where there are no distractions. Surely in his / her room all the toys are readily available ? Where's the point in that ?

Betty - posted on 12/02/2009

Just discipline them the same way. Whatever way you are allowed to discipline the steps should be how you discipline your own. As long as you aren't physically or emotionally harming them you should be able to do the same for everyone. The typical go to your room, no computer for the night kind of thing is fair game for all.

Christine - posted on 12/01/2009

you shouldnt treat either differently....you should discipline them the same way.

Jen - posted on 12/01/2009

the same as the natural, if you spank its a harder call but as long as you dont beat them which you wouldnt anyways its not abuse

Teresa - posted on 12/01/2009

I did discipline my step-daughter just like i did my own. In my house she was my child. And she had three other sisters. today she calls me MOM!! She is a very beautiful woman and i Love her to death. And i still treat her like shes mine.So you can discipline a step-child like your own.