Do men allways have to argu about everything?

Denise - posted on 06/22/2009 ( 12 moms have responded )

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My step daughter just moved in and was conplaining that i didnt do the laundry fast enough. So I told her she could do her own. My husband didnt think that was far???

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Betty - posted on 06/23/2009

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I started doing my own laundry by the time I was 10 because my mom wouldn't do it quick enuf and I didn't dare to complain to her about it. Instead I asked her to teach me how. Kids are so spoiled these days. What happened and what are we doing wrong?

Di - posted on 06/22/2009

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Exactly Jessica, if hubby don't like it let him do the laundry. Where does she get off demanding and where does he get off saying you are unfair.... both need a wake up call so stop doing any laundry and then they might appreciate you more. I wouldn't really not do the laundry, but sometimes I feel like it. You haven't done anything wrong, in fact stand your ground and do the laundry when you do it, and if she doesn't like it then tough. You aren't her maid.

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Erika - posted on 06/26/2009

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I struggled with trying to get my step kids to put their clothes in the basket at first but they now know if its not in there it doesnt get washed! I now cannot do the washing by myself as my nearly 3 and nearly 2 year olds are in there loading/ unloading/ starting the washing machine for me, they think its fun. I have also encouraged my SS (11) and SD (8) to do the folding not only at our place (where 7 of us live) but at their Bio Mums place too just to give her a hand. Its always the one thing I leave till the last moment, I hate doing the ironing. Good Luck :p

Amy - posted on 06/24/2009

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Quoting Di:

*snippet* You aren't her maid.



Too true. You also aren't a short-order cook, or a butler, or anything else like that. 11 is more than old enough to do her own laundry. Hell, I started doing mine when I was 9 or 10 because I got sick of my mom ruining my clothes!!!

Amy - posted on 06/24/2009

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Short reply: YES. But not always.



I don't think it is unreasonable for children to help with chores, or even do some chores themselves. But it depends on the age. My daughter (who is only 2) helps me unload the dishwasher, and my stepson (nearly 5) usually helps me fold laundry.



It can be really frustrating at times to argue about what to do with your step-child if the bio-parent isn't on the same page. What I've found that helps when my boyfriend and I don't see eye to eye on something is the gather whatever evidence I can and present them to him when neither of us are upset. I give him my opinion, and if he doesn't agree with me after I've talked to him about it, then he will tell me why. We've only had 2 or 3 times total (over 3 years) when we couldn't come to an agreement after such a conversation.



You have to have your 'lines in the sand', but you should also decide what things are worth fighting about and what aren't, and keep the lines of communication open, or you'll just damage your relationship with your husband.

Shannon - posted on 06/24/2009

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I think thats the perfect solution! Or like Jessica said tell your husband he can do it!

Amanda - posted on 06/23/2009

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Yea for some reason hubbys like to argue about every lil thing. It doesnt change that fact it was said already children are so spoiled these days it sickening. I can remember helping my mom do laundry amongst other things an I expected the same in return when I had kids. Well I ended up with a step daughter before I had my own children and my goodness LAZY. Whatever happened to kids wanting to help. All they want to do now is sit on a couch an be couch potatoes. Kudos to you hun stand your ground and tell her you should respect the things I do for you becausetheres gonna come a day when your going ot have to do it all on your own no one will be there to help you. What are you gonna do then?

Misty - posted on 06/23/2009

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Good for u!! My stepson came to stay here and demanded his laundry done a certain way. I told him this is the way I do my laundry and if he didnt like it I would let him do his own laundry, and that is what I did. Then I started putting his laundry to the side til he would let it sit there til it would stink like mildew it was nwasty but he finally got the picture and did his own laundry.

Di - posted on 06/22/2009

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lol, I bet it doesn't work for her at all and she will be almost begging you to start doing it again even if you are late with it....Good for you Denise, some sms find it really difficult to stand up to the kids, especially without dad in their corner so kudos to you.

Denise - posted on 06/22/2009

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Thanks. I made her do it before she went to school, she had to also put it in dryer before she left. I put it all on her bed unfolded. She had to put it away. I plan on doing this for a few weeks and see how that work for her. LOL

Denise - posted on 06/22/2009

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she is 11 my 13 year old daughter has been doing hurts own if she need something

Jessica - posted on 06/22/2009

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How old is she? Tell your husband that if her doesn't think that it's fair, HE can do her laundry....

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