Megan - posted on 09/13/2009 ( 31 moms have responded )
My husband and I had his two children this past weekend for normal visitation. When he picked them up, the kids' stepfather tried to get my husband to fight. He pushed my husband with his shoulder, trying to get my husband to throw the first punch, which he of course did not. This all hapened in front of two children and other people at a BP in Kentucky. When my husband dropped the kids back off today he brought his brother along. The stepfather still came out with verbal attacks, with bm at his side throwing her's in as well. Again, all in front of two kids and a host of strangers. BM nor stepfather asked about SD's project for school, nor said anything to either of the kids, but instead went straight into a verbal assault against their father while the kids were trying to move their bags from one car to another.
My husband is normally a very laid back person (laid back to a fault some would say) but even he admitted to wanting to give this guy what he wanted, i.e. a fight. Meanwhile, I am sitting here in shock that people act this way. Surely this cannot be normal, right? What kind of people do this sort of thing?
We haven't spoken to our attorney about the whole thing yet, and we have been keeping a journal of occurences for some time. But how am I supposed to feel comfortable with my husband -- the love of my life -- putting himself in physical danger everytime he transports his own kids? I am not able to make the trip with him, so what do we do when he can't find anyone else to go either?
Finally, I am concerned because I have a biological child with my husband. I feel like I must do whatever I can to protect her and ensure that her environment is a safe one. I want the very best for my stepkids, but my daughter is only 21 months old and I feel very protective of her. There doesn't seem to be any way to keep the drama from entering my home.
I feel so sad for my stepkids and for my husband. I feel that their bm has chosen to live a life full of drama and to keep that drama at such an unhealthy level. I worry that for them it may be too late to teach them that there are better ways to live.
I am not really asking for answers, but I sort of needed someone else to tell me that this is not normal adult behavior. Thanks.