Keya - posted on 12/12/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )
My step daughter is my bio daughter to me. She has lived with my husband and I since she was two. He had her before we got married. I have a son who was one. Now the kids are 6 and 7. I have planned every B-day party, got her into ballet, a private school, I do her hair each night, i have stayed up with her when she's sick, . Mom doesn't live in the same state as us anymore but even when she did she rarely picked her daughter up, My step daughter calls me Momma when she was 5 she started to ask about BM and wonder why Mom never came or called.
It hurt my heart to see her feel rejected. My hub and I packed up the car at spring break and drove her and Mom other kids 8 hours out of state to see her... I think that may have been a mistake... she came back a little Sassy, " She would say I wish I lived with My momma when she got scolded for something or my other Mom doesn't punish me." Moms been in town 3 times since then she spends lots of cash (even though she never seems to have money to help us with any dental bills or school tuition or even back to school supplies), she buys polish and lip gloss they eat out, or go to a movie, and drops her off) We are left with a little monster who cries for Mom when ever she gets in trouble and withraws from me and will only hug/kiss or deal with my husband and be mean to our son. She will scream or cry if he even touches something Mom bought... Then my daughter will be the little girl we are raising and 3 months later Mom will call again or just show up and my SD school from out of town w/o warning and the cycle continues. She did this again just this week after we hadn't heard from her since August, Though I had a party planned for her B-day, she requested my SD and my husband felt my SD should go because it could be months before his EX surfaces again sooo I cancelled everything and for the first time in 5 years I am not there for my daughters b-day. I'm sad, I'm annoyed and I sometimes hate that I signed on to having my heart ripped out when ever this lady decides to show up. She and I have sat down before come up with arrangements we can all live with but she never keeps her word there are always an unforseen circumstance.. Am I wrong to feel this way,? We planned to spend Xmas in orlando this year because my SD never got to go the last time because Mom insisted on taking her to a family reunion, now after she drops her off this time we will have this naughty little girl on vacation who will talk about nothing but what she did with Mom and how she wishes she could be with her... My husband seems to think we should let my SD stay with her and she will see all that stuff her Mom ususally does can't happen on a daily basis..