Is it fair to ask stepdaughter not to stay at our home during college spring break?

TAMMY - posted on 02/15/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hello again...need some advice. My stepdaughter is due to have spring break from college starting around 2/26 and lasting until 3/8...she has sent a text message to her dad (not me, of course) and stated she would like to stay here for about a week, but if it is going to cause trouble then she doesn't want to do that (that is her way of manipulating the situation...she would love nothing more than to cause trouble between her dad and I). She didn't even bother to ask me anything because she figures if she asks her dad whatever he says goes, not to mention she doesn't have enough brass on her face to ask me...she has told her dad she is finished with me completely...I don't understand because I have done nothing to her except marry her dad. I have found out that I have a heart problem that is greatly aggravated by stress and anxiety...would I be in the wrong to ask her to stay somewhere else? Under the circumstances, I don't think that is asking too much. Any advice any of you can give me will be greatly appreciated...thank you.

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TAMMY - posted on 02/17/2010

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She doesn't care if she causes trouble..that's what she wants...what she has always wanted. I am so tired of fighting this. She tells me she needs her daddy every single day of her life...that sounds like total insecurity to me. I love my father, but I don't need him every day of my life because I know I can make it on my own...if I need him ...he will be there, but I don't have to have him in my business every single day. I feel so sorry for her boyfriend because he will never measure up to her dad...he will always be compared and that's not fair. Really considering letting go and moving on with my life alone.

Vanessa - posted on 02/15/2010

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Talk to your husband --- get him to explain to her the implications if she causes trouble and the health issues that you have.

Failing that and they need Daddy/Daughter time - book yourself into a resort for a week!

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