Dawn - posted on 01/16/2009 ( 29 moms have responded )
Here's the story...I would love to get some input on this situation.
I'm divorced for 2 years, remarried for one. Two kids. Great relationship with ex - out to dinner together (me, husband and ex with the kids), birthday parties with ex and all families..etc.
Then SHE moved in with him. SHE is a 43 year old, educated woman with no kids of her own. I was excited....really... A woman with no other kids, all her attention could go to my kids. Good thing... I thought.
I asked the ex when I could meet her. He put me off for months. Then he came clean. He said SHE would NOT meet me. SHE did not like me. And SHE did not want to be a "parental figure" for our children. WHAT??? Where did that stupid logic come from? I was not jealous of her, I was happy for their relationship. How could the woman not like me when she had never ever spoke two words to me???
I'm the kind of Mom who knew everyone in their lives', but I wasn't allowed to meet someone who they lived in the same house with!! I could not understand why I would be 'dissed' in such a ugly way. But I was ... still am.
Its been a year. I have never laid eyes on this woman who lives with my children every other weekend. I have never communicated with her. The positive relationship I had with my ex has turned to hatred after this nightmare of legal battles, fighting, etc . that only began after SHE moved in.
My hands are tied.
The kids like her just fine. She has little to nothing to do with them.
I've dropped it months ago...however, I cannot help but to hate this situation with a passion.
When my ex found out I was in a serious relationship, he specifically said that he wanted to meet this man who was "going to be in his children's lives". I agreed without hesitation. They met. I was stupied enough to assume he would be so respectful.
What do you think? What would you do if you were in my shoes?