Allision - posted on 07/01/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )
Hello! My name is Allision and I am 28 years old. I live in Ohio and have 3 step-children. My husband and I also have a 4 year old daughter together. I have been a step-mom going on 6 years now. A year ago in June my husband and I received temporary custody of 2 of my step-kids.
There is a legal situation behind this. My stepkids are 15 yr old boy, 13 yr old boy and 10 yr old girl. There mother would leave the 15 yr old in charge of the other 2. The 15 yr old beat the 13 yr old and did nasty things to the 10 yr old. We are currently in the process of trying to get permanent custody of the 2 youngest children. The oldest is 2.5 hrs away with his grandparents. This is a very difficult situation. The children never had discipline, their mom wasn't involved in the school or any or their work. They were pretty much allowed to do what they wanted to do. When school was in session they would go to school, their mom would be home. By the time school was out then she would be at work. They would be at home all alone until around 12 at night. In our home there are 2 of us. There is constantly someone home. We have a babysitter if we need one. There are lots of problems we are having due to the way these children were raised.
One being a problem with lying. They lye constantly. They don't do what you ask them to do. They make excuses for not doing chores. We are having a struggle with the 10 yr old the most at the moment. They are both cognitively delayed. They are not at the level of learning as other kids their age.
At the time my stepkids see their mom once every two weeks for 2 hours. They talk to her for a half hour once a week and an hour on the weekend. Lately my stepson has not wanted to talk to nor see his mom. Our 10 yr old however struggles with issues and her emotions. Their mom doesn't talk to them about their feelings. She states she is not allowed. There is so much to this situation that I could go on and on. I just want to know if there is any advice from anyone that could maybe help with our situation. Discipline is a big issue and them getting along with their mom is as well.
I hope I didn't tell to much but I wanted to get the point across. Any advice, help or whatever would be great. Thanks!!!! I hope I can learn alot from this site.