Serious Problems with Bio-Mom

Christina - posted on 06/19/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My husband and I have been together for two years. I have a child from a previous relationship as does he. We also have a 16 month old son and another baby on the way. For two years my husband's ex has litteraly made our lives hell. She has tried to run me over twice, made accusations that i was smoking pot in front of my step-son, accusations that I spank him all the time, that i yell at him, that I sit him down and tell him horrile things about his mom, that I tell him he isn't allowed to tell his mom anything about what goes on at our house, etc., etc. These are just a few of the things we've dealt with, keep in mind they're not even the worst things we've dealt with. She has taken all of this to the GAL in our custody case and without even looking into anything she just takes the mom's word and is trying to use it against us. The GAL has even went as far as telling the Superintendent at school that I shouldn't be allowed to go to the school for any reason not even for my own child, so as I don't upset this woman.

I have put up with all these horrible accusations for over two years and it won't stop. I have had a restraining order on her for nearly two years thinking this may put a stop to it. She has had my step-son call me and tell me I'm a stupid b***h. It's driving me insane. I don't know how to deal with it, or make other people realize i'm not doing the things she saying. I have not been allowed to be with my husband when he picks up his son and have abided by this as to not cause more drama for my step-son. She's trying to get it put into the custody agreement that I am never to have anything to do with him. I need advice. What do I do. This is beyond rediculous and is out of hand.

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Denise - posted on 06/22/2009

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Is child pertective involved. CPS. You need to talk to your lawyer if you have one. She has alot of control and you need to take it back. My husbands ex is a bitch. I cant stand her. We have her two kids now and there isnt a damm thing she can do. We took his son a year ago. She was messing up his meds. He has downs sydrome. We just got his daughter 3 weeks ago. She and I but head alot. But she would rather live here.. I wish you the best of luck. Dont give her power and fight back with works. She will get hers in the end. She cant say you cant be around the kid..YOU are MARRIED to the dad. No judge will let her do that.

Di - posted on 06/22/2009

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As soon as I started to read it I thought the bm is seriously unhinged. So I agree with Amanda and Penny to get one court ordered and I agree with Betty too, get yourself a really good lawyer. I feel so sad for your ss. And you are absolutely right, it is beyond ridiculous. Hopefully it will somehow get turned around but I can't tell you how when I am all the way in Australia and our laws are different. Keep your chin up and I know its hard, but vent away on here and keep yourself sane. Good luck and God bless.

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I'm so sorry to hear how horrible things are your way. I can totally relate to a lot of what you've written and have gone through some crazy things with GAL and BM too. When we went to court GAL our way pretty much discredited herself on the witness stand and couldn't prove her 'reports' she had submitted to the court earlier. I am also a teacher and I can't see how a school can turn one parent away and accept another. I know we had some parents at our school bickering because their daughters were and my principal pretty much told them to knock it off and not to bring personal issues and problems with them when picking up the kids, school events, etc. And about BM requesting the custody agreement where you are not involved, I would hope no judge would go for that. BM our way tried to do the same thing.. that only hubby be only one allowed to see SD, call her, etc and he shot that down by stating right in the court order that SD needs to know BOTH sides of her family. I'm sorry I don't have much advice. I definitely think a psyc eval is needed and or family therapy/counseling. Hope things look up for you.

Amanda - posted on 06/19/2009

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I feel for you. Jealousy can make people do crazy things, and I can relate to so many of the problems you have had with the bm. While she is asking the courts for all these unreasonable things just because she doesn't like you, your husband can being asking that she undergo a psychological evaluation because she has done some pretty unstable things. The court can require her to do this and if she has tried to run you over it sounds like she needs to anyway. Good luck. The bm can make it really hard on without even realizing she's hurting her child too. It makes me sick that these women can just get away with it.

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