What do your step children call you?

[deleted account] ( 189 moms have responded )

I am a Stepmother to a very young girl (almost 2)...and she calls me mom...because her mother left for a year and didn't see her that whole time...well now she is back in her life and is upset that she is only calling me mom and not her. She cant say my name and im not sure that I would want her to because I am like her mom so anyone have any thoughts or suggestions on names to call me?

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Melissa - posted on 06/28/2009

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My step son usually calls me Mama Melissa. Sometimes he calls me Mom and sometimes just Melissa, but usually the other. This still REALLY upsets his mom but she is very insecure with me being in his life (we have full residential custody.) Personally I don't care how it makes his mom feel. If it makes it easier on him to deal with the whole messed up situation then that is what is OK with me and he can call me whatever he likes. She is an adult and needs to get over it. I am like a mom to him. I am the one who fixes his meals and sits up with him when he is sick and kisses his boo boos. I am the one who deals with his temper tantrums and makes him pick up his toys- not her. I have earned that and by calling me "Mama" I think he is recognizing that role I play in his life but still reserving that special just "Mom" for his real mom, which again, is fine with me.

Betty - posted on 06/28/2009

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My sd calls me by my first name. Sometimes she will say mommy but I need her to call me by my name because her mom would be so upset. I just don't respond until she says my name unless I can tell she is just really upset and in need of a mommy moment.

I don't recomend making her call you something differant because that won't make her want to call her bm mom any quicker and she would be hurt inside. Her bm is going to need to step up to earn that title and the two of you will just need to share it if she dose.

Jessica - posted on 08/04/2009

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I'm now reading over the other posts. It makes me laugh when moms get mad that a child wants to call the Step mom, mom or mommy. I am a step mom and I am a bio mom. My daughter just got a step mom a few years back.

Maybe it's because I've been a step mom so long but I know how it feels. You love that child so much and there is a bond that grows. You didn't replace anything you just enhanced their life even more. I encourage my daughter to respect and listen to her step mom and in the last year I have even talked to her about calling her mom. I told her if she is comfortable she can with out worrying about my feelings. Because her bond with her step mom has nothing to do with the love my daughter and I have. These moms that freak when their children want to call a step parent mom must be very insecure or something. The only time I could see where it could be justified would be if the spouse was cheating with that Step mom and that caused the family to break up. But other then that I can't see why it would be such an issue.

This last thought is to everyone that is a step mom or a bio mom. Do what's best for your children, weather they are your step or biological children. Love them hold them take care of them be there for them. Who cares what titles the kids give you as long as they are respectful of course. :)

To your situation that bio mom should appreciate you for taking care of her child she left in the dust for whatever reason. She should respect the role you have played in that babies life. She should be grateful that you were able to give her such love.

Lisa - posted on 08/19/2009

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I think Mom is fine also this little one has only memorys of you. Her bio mom should get over it. good luck

Katie - posted on 08/13/2009

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You totally deserve to be called Mom, and a two year old who is just getting a grasp on rolls and words needs the least amount of complication as possible. My stepdaughter was only 18months when my son was born, so they are very close. She called me "Katie-Mommy" for a couple years, which helped my son understand as well, but she is 5 now and her BM flips and yells at her about it, so I told her she can call me whatever she wants and makes her feel the most comfortable. So she just calls me Katie now like her BM tells her to, I don't care. She loves me and knows who I am no matter what she calls me. It is hard though, because my sons call me Katie more than mommy as well now.

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Lisa - posted on 08/19/2009

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My sk's call me lisa. I am a mom of 3 myself, and if I put myself in BM shoe's, I'm not sure I would like it either! I think it may be different if the bm is not involved in the children's live's, but in our situation that is not the case. I love my sk's like they are my own blood, and I treat them no different then the way I would treat my bio children. The only thing that matter's to me is that they understand how much I love and care for them, how they address me is irrelevant.

Rebecca - posted on 08/19/2009

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You have been her mother in the critical stages of her life, and you are the only 1 she knows as mom. I wouldnt change a thing. The bio needs to realize that its her fault for leaving the child to begin with. My SD is 5, and lives with her bio during the week and we have her on the weekends. She calls me mama, mommy, or Rebecca. Whichever is fine with me. However, she sometimes calls me mama in front of her bio, and then her bio makes her hang up and probably gets in trouble. My SD would much rather live here and just visit her bio, but unfortunately, Indiana thinks children are best with their bios regardless of incapabilities. Just let her call you what she wants.

Melissa - posted on 08/17/2009

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My ex wasn't in the pic at all and my Mom started my daughter calling (my boyfriend at the time) my husband Dad. It was good cause her Bio-Dad wasn't there at all. My step-daughter was calling her Mom's boyfriend Dad (but that was cause she would get into trouble if she didn't) My husband wasn't comfortable with it at all cause he is her Daddy and he has been there for her since her birth! He Mom told her if she wanted to she could call me Mom. I told her it's totally up to her. It was weird for me at first but now I am used to it and she is TOTALLY like my daughter. I do everything her Bio-Mom didn't do for her (take care of her!!!!!) GO AHEAD AND LET HER CALL YOU MOM!!!!!!!!!!!

TONYA - posted on 08/17/2009

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If that child feels that you are her mom then its her decision to call you that. My grandmother raised me and I always called her mama. They tried to get me to call her granny but to me she wasnt my granny she was my mama. If you are the one loving and caring for her then no matter what, YOU are her mom.

TONYA - posted on 08/17/2009

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If that child feels that you are her mom then its her decision to call you that. My grandmother raised me and I always called her mama. They tried to get me to call her granny but to me she wasnt my granny she was my mama. If you are the one loving and caring for her then no matter what, YOU are her mom.

Mystika - posted on 08/16/2009

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Try reminding the bio-mom that this is not about her but about your stepdaughter. If your stepdaughter is comfortable and happy calling you mom you should not interfere with that. She can call both of you mom. My stepson (5 yrs old) has been living with me and my husband exclusively for a year and a half now. His mother would call him sporadically and he needed to make sense of his situation so he asked if he could call me mom. I told him that if that makes him happy and that's what he wants to do then he can do so. His bio-mom does not like it but in the end it isn't about what she wants. She is now serving time in prison for DUI and DWSL for 2 years. In the end it was good for him to be with me and identify me as his mom because now that his "other" mom, as he calls her, is in jail, he can still make sense of his life and not have to worry about what will happen to him next. Children need stability and they need consistency. It is not a good idea to change things in your stepdaughter's life now; especially at her very young age. Uprooting her in any way, including changing how she identifies you and identifies with you will cause more problems for her which will transfer to you and/or her bio-mom in the end.

Talina - posted on 08/15/2009

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Hi, first of all, congrats on being a step mom! Don't worry over this. Your step daughter loves you & to her you are her mom. My step son has called me mom since the first day I ever met him. He was 3 yrs old at the time. His bio mom left him too. So, what if her bio mom is mad because her daughter that she left is calling you mom. The bio mom will either get over it or deal with it. Let her call u mom. Don't make her call you anything else. It will seriously confuse her. She is use to calling you mom, so let her. It's not her fault or yours that her bio mom left her. Being a step mom is being a mom! Because you are always there for that child when their bio mom isn't. So, let it be for now. When she is older, say about 4 maybe 5, tell her the difference. She will thank you later for being honest with her. But for now just let her call you mom! Hope this info was helpful to you! Good Luck!

[deleted account]

My son calls me Tammy...I met him not long before he was 3. His mum has always had a big (and negative) influence on him...and I am sure she was always in his ear about me not being his real mum and not calling me mum etc...at the sametime as having him call her boyfriend dad (who didn't last long!). I have always said taht Alex can call me either Tammy or mum. When he was younger he had issues with it all, but again i think this was because his mum was in his ear. He would occassionally call me mum and I would just let it slide and answer to either. Then he went through a stage when he started school where people would assume I was his mum and call me 'mum' in reference to him and he would get confused and eventually figure it out and say "Oh, that's not my mum, that's Tammy". He's ten now and still calls me Tammy, probably as a result of all that early stuff, but he no longer gets upset if people call me his mum and he now understands that I am his stepmum and who his biomum is. To be honest I would prefer if he called me mum just so he blended and connected better with his siblings, and because I do a whole lot more mothering than his mother does but I will never push it.

Charlie - posted on 08/15/2009

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MOM......you are after all.....you have earned that title sweetheart so dont confuse the poor girl !! She chose u as her mom and u should be proud of her... her b/m has no right to pass on her insicurities to you...she has no right to want you to be called anything other than what you are MOM...xxxxx

Carol - posted on 08/14/2009

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I have two daughters, two step-daughters and an adopted son. My step-daughters call me by my first name (which often confused my son when he was little). However, my two daughters call their step-mother "Mom" and my husband (their step-dad) "Dad." I say: let them choose whatever makes them feel comfortable. "Mom, Mommy, Mama or Ma" are all nice because it carries that emotional connection; however, I know my step-daughter's mother doesn't like when they even speak of me (even after 12 years), so I never wanted them to feel forced to call me Mom, and I never felt uncomfortable when they introduced me by my first name. Now that they are older, they call me their step-mother--as they are hugging me. Life is good!

Janet - posted on 08/14/2009

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I have 3 Step-children 2 Step-sons & 1 Step-daughter, We left it up to the Children it was there descision if they wanted to call me mum, as long as they were comfortable we did not put them under any pressure at all. My husband was a widower and he lost his wife when the children were 3 Years, 2 Years & 9 months. I met the children when they were 12 years 11 years and 9 nine years. Now they have grown up they are 20 19 &16 and they still call me mum, It is lovely to think although they have lost there mum, they think of me as there mum, they have never forgotten there mum at all, on her Birthdays/Mothering Sunday and other occassions will visit her grave.

Estella - posted on 08/14/2009

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momis fine the io mom needs to realize you are thier mom also it canbe a sticky situation though..She just needs to act liek an adult which i know they usually do not...

a mom is not someone who gave birth to a child but a child trust and feels safe with a person they look up to and respect....but I do understand not all is black and white if you want the girls can always call you memom that is one solution and probrbaly a good idea to keep the ex at bay

I hope you both request watch visitation for awhile to find out her true intentions.

Tiffany - posted on 08/14/2009

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All right girly~ the consensus is: Let her call you whatever SHE is comfortable with. When will these bm's (hehe) realize that the children come FIRST. NO MATTER WHAT! If a bm can't handle something like this, they should try to imagine what the children are going through! Confusion and conflict in a little mini-kids mind. How self-centered of these people! It's not about them. period. My bf let my sf adopt me and bf is still mad I call sf Dad. I'm 39! Get over it!

Christine - posted on 08/13/2009

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As much as you are "like" her mom you arent. And you dont want to be like her mom cause her mom left her. Her calling you by your name doesnt make you any less of a mother to her. My step children call me by my name but refer to me as mom on paper or when speaking to others. Forcing it could just cause resentment.

Danielle - posted on 08/13/2009

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If the biological mom isn't mature enough or reasonable enough to know why her daughter calls you mom, then that's her problem. My boyfriend's two babies (6 y/o son & 3 y/o daughter) call me Danielle, Mommy Danielle, Step mommy, and sometimes the occasional mom slips out. Yes, they are so young and you don't want them to feel like they are saying something wrong or make them feel bad if they call you mom, but also they are old enough to understand the difference between their bio mom and me whether they call me mom sometimes or not. Your step daughter's bio mom was out of her life for a year, what does she expect? My step son and daughter's mom pretty much only has only seen them every other weekend for the last year and that only became consistent in the past few months, and they call mom sometimes. I live with them and I see them everyday and night....it's only natural that a child will sometimes call you mom and your case even more so. The child is 2 and you've been there for her, kissing her boo boos, protecting and caring for her, and loving her just like any person with a caring heart would for a child which is what makes a woman a mother (step mother or not). Anyone can carry a child and give birth, but not everyone can love and raise a child and that's how you define motherhood.

[deleted account]

We told the girls they could call me by whatever made them comfortable. At first it was always Megan, now more often than not its mom. If people call me their mom they don't correct them. Their bm has a real problem with them calling me mom, yet makes them call their stepdad dad. And told them that their real dad was no longer there dad. That didn't go over so well. Their BM told them that when we got engaged they could call me Mom. So now they are very intent on getting us engaged. I think its whatever is best for the kids.

They Call Me Mom! - posted on 08/13/2009

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The problem is not with YOU or with your SD. The problem of the hurt feelings is on the person that left and is now upset.



I let my step daughter call me by my name, because that is what she is most comfortable with. If she chose to call me "Mom" then that would be ok too. I was married previously and my first set of step kids called me Mom by choice. They were a bit older when I married their dad and when we all got together, I just explained to them that they could call me whatever they felt most comfortable with as long as it wasn't derogatory. They started calling me by my name, but then quickly switched to Mom.



You don't worry about what she calls you. This person left...for whatever her reasons...and now she is mad? Well, too bad so sad. It is more important for the child to allow her to call you as she wishes and to help her know that the world is safe. So, if bio-mom is mad about that she needs to find a professional to speak with regarding her own insecurities. That is neither yours nor the child's fault.



Keep being there for your stepdaughter and let bio deal with her issues.

Andie - posted on 08/13/2009

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I´m stepmom of 8 children between 24 and 9 years old.The big ones call me by my name, and the youngest calls me mom, if we´re alone or to they´re friends.Not in front of the other children.

In your case: enjoy that she´s calling you mom, because a child sais what it feels!!!

Bailey - posted on 08/12/2009

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i have my step son call me mither. it is an irish worde for mom. but i really eave it up to him i have never pushed the issue although his mother hats me and cant stand when she hears him say it. you love her and she loves you i think there is nothing wrong with her calling you mom esspecially because in the past yr you were the one to help her when she would cry, be ick etc. stand your ground you have a right to be and love that little girl dont let her mother who was gone for a long time take that away from you. kit ive been there done that and know how hard being a step m0m is!

Amy - posted on 08/12/2009

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Quoting Meghan:hi my name is amy i have a step son he is almost 4 year old i been the only mother in his left because his real mother walk out of his left i had he seem he was one year old sometime she came in his life and  he call her by her name and she get mad but i say i am the only people he know all this time as mom and you can not blame him for call me what he want beside you are mother to this baby girl just because you did not give birth to her dont made you her mother because this how i look at it who wake up with this little girl when she is scary or when she is sick who made her favorite food who keep her safe you do and if this other woman want to be in this children life tell where would went she need you  a year ago from someone have a baby i dont know how this woman who give birth to they children then walk away then this what i say to them stop lay down and made this baby it just hurt this baby in the long run but you keep you hand up this woman we maybe leave again she dont want her she see your man happy with you so she want that

What do your step children call you?

I am a Stepmother to a very young girl (almost 2)...and she calls me mom...because her mother left for a year and didn't see her that whole time...well now she is back in her life and is upset that she is only calling me mom and not her. She cant say my name and im not sure that I would want her to because I am like her mom so anyone have any thoughts or suggestions on names to call me?


 

Tara - posted on 08/11/2009

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My SD9 also asked what she should call me. I told her she could call me whatever she wants and we could even come up with a special nickname. She calls me T-Mom. T is the first initial of my name. DH also calls me that with her. It will make things easier once we have our own children and they call me mom. I wouldn't want them to call me by my first name.

Michelle - posted on 08/11/2009

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i am 37, have 9 kids some biological some step, i brought up 2 step kids for 10 years and have always been the only mother figure in their lives. they are both grown up now and as with most of the others have moved out of home and made me and my husband grandparents (8 by october this year!) they have never actually called me mum to my face, but in cards, on gifts or when talking about me im mum. all that matters is that you are there for them. they will call you whatever they want to call you and at 2 years old i dont think there is anything wrong with her calling you mom! my grandkids call me nanny even tho some of them are not biologically but that is purely science! family is in the heart! try getting her to call one of you mom and the other momma? just a slight difference or something

Sadonna - posted on 08/10/2009

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i think that its ok 4 her 2 call u mom she is still young she will learn as she gets older that she has 2 moms.

Jeanieann - posted on 08/07/2009

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I HAVE A 15 YEAR OLD STEP SON WHO IN MY HEART FEELS JUST LIKE MY OWN. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. HE CALLS ME MOM... BUT AS I TOLD HIM, YOU CALL ME WHAT YOU FEEL IN YOUR HEART. I WILL ANSWER TO WHAT EVER YOU ARE COMFORTABLE WITH. SO HE CALLS MY MOM. SO IN MY HEART I BELIEVE IT'S WHAT EVER THE CHILD WOULD LIKE TO CALL YOU... I HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GREAT WEEKEND... HUGS JEANIEANN

Lindsay - posted on 08/07/2009

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my stepson just started talking and called me mum. even after we tried getting him to say my name.

Kelly - posted on 08/04/2009

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Hi I was in exactly the same situation as you, I met my hubby when my step son was just two, he lived with my hubby, his mom was not around for a while and Jacob called me mom from early in. We are very lucky that we get on great with his birth mom, Jacob calls us both Mom well he calls me Mum and her Mom. Jacob lives with us in England and his Mom is in America. Being a step mom is hard work but so rewarding, I am his Mum I was there when he was sick and needed me but I also respect that I am not his biological mommy and I am so thankfull that we have the relationship that we do and that she trusts me enough to trust her child in me. I know that we are lucky and I dont take that for granted. I hope it works out for you x



Kelly

Jill - posted on 08/04/2009

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We are going to have my step-sons call me Mammy, at least the younger two. they are 2 1/2 and 20 months. But honestly, shes known you as MOM for the last year, so its her own fault, but speaking from a moms view....I know why shes hurt. I would leave it, but it is a suggestion. :-)

Jessica - posted on 08/04/2009

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If that child is calling you mom cause BIO mom was gone then BIO mom needs to deal with that.



My SD calls me mom, mommy whatever her mom hasn't been in her life since she was one. If she came back she would call her by her first name till SD wanted to call her mom or whatever. I don't ever see that happening seeing how SD is almost 10 and we haven't heard from her at all since she was 4 but who knows...

Dorothy - posted on 08/04/2009

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my step kids call me mommy and when they r talking to their mom about me or anything we have done together they refer to me as mommy dot to her. Mommy dot was actually their mothers idea. the youngest started with it when she was 2 1/2 almost 3 and the other 2 just followed in her footsteps

Joada - posted on 08/04/2009

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I think it's ok for her to call you mom.. as she gets older you can just tell her your lucky to have 2 moms.. and her bio moms a flake so shell prob split again after awhile..my little boy had the same problem.. these other parents will try to make the kids feel guilty.. great parents huh... you'll be ok you'r stable she needs you!!

Beck - posted on 08/03/2009

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I actually get called a nickname by my step son, but I came into his life quite late (he was 6) so it was never really a big thing for us. He has decided he does not want to call me mum, and I am happy with that arrangement as I am very aware i am not his mum. Who knows what will happen when he gets older and my nickname has become babyish to him.

Diana - posted on 08/03/2009

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Unfortunately, the call me very bad things. They live with their manipulating mother who can't seem to get over the fact that she was unfaithful and not forgiven. She vowed to make his live a living hell and anyone he invited into it. They seen me on weekends and preferred to visit my house than their biological grandmothers. That is until the ex found out that they were starting to love me. She quickly made sure that they believed that he had chosen me over them and quickly manipulated them into saying they no longer wanted to see their father. Hard to fight a court that is almost 2-3 hours away and no more money. So answer to your question... I am sure whatever she calls you isn't half as bad as what my step-children call me. How about MeMa... Me for Melissa and Ma for Maloy. You still get the Ma in there. Honestly, I wouldn't stress it. Out of habit she will still call you mom even if it is from time to time. Just love her to death and totally do not give the biological mother the energy she so does not deserve. The young girl is 2 and young enough that she will know who her mom is as she is growing up. Stay grounded.

Michelle - posted on 07/30/2009

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My oldest and youngest SSs call me by my first name, but my middle SS has called me mom the minute his dad proposed. Their mom isn't very involved and left when they were small so I think he was so excited to have a "mom". :)



My youngest calls my husband Dad but the older two still call him by his first name. They see their dad every week with a standard visitation schedule.

Leane - posted on 07/30/2009

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My step-daughter was 18 months old when her Dad and I started dating. Her mother had been out of the picture for over a year at that time, so she had a habit of calling any female-in-charge "mama". I stopped that for me. I felt that I wanted her to have a name for me that was "just me". My name is LEANE (lee-ahn) She couldn't say that so I became AHNE. It really stuck! My 5 year old calls me AHNE, as do my 3 grandkids! Now that my step-daughter is a teenager she still calls me Ahne but refers to me as her"mom", most of the time.

Jeanette - posted on 07/30/2009

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I have a 14 yr.old step-son who calls me by my name but, my step-daughter calls me mommy. At first i was uncomfortable because i thought my kids would get jealous but, then i worried that their bio mom would have a fit. I came to realise that if she's comfortable calling me that then it's because she loves me and that if her mom was acting like a mom maybe she wouldn't be callling me mommy and her mom. I love her she loves me and that's it!!

Michelle - posted on 07/29/2009

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You are her mom!! The other person is also "mom" by birth only. The child comes first and should call you mom if she wants to. The other person will just have to deal with it, after all she allowed it to happen by leaving. It's ok for their to be 2 moms, b/c there are 2 of you. she's cute, and looks very happy. good job..

Michelle - posted on 07/29/2009

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You are her mom!! The other person is also "mom" by birth only. The child comes first and should call you mom if she wants to. The other person will just have to deal with it, after all she allowed it to happen by leaving. It's ok for their to be 2 moms, b/c there are 2 of you. she's cute, and looks very happy. good job..

Luzenia - posted on 07/29/2009

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if her mother has a problem with YOUR little girl calling you mom its her own fault she left and she will have to deal with it my step children call me momma pebbles and their mother hates it but i have them full time and when she does get them every other weekend they stay with their grandma so its her own fault that her children dont see her as a mother you SD is very young so its kinda hard to explain the situation to her my SK are a little older so when my step sons ask me why my son calls me momma i can explain to them that i didnt not give birth to them like i did to my birth son so he calls me momma but they have a momma and i am their momma pebbles i also think its a respect issue my son calls his step mother mommy sara and i encourage it because she is also a mother figure in his life and he needs to respect her as such don't worry about your little girls bio mom chances are she will just walk away again

FAITH - posted on 07/28/2009

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My step son calls me Mammy when it fits his mood lol....but thats ok i know he loves me. Its hard being a step mom . some times i dont know what to do.

Pam - posted on 07/28/2009

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Hi - you cannot be blamed for something you did not do. Feel certain her bio mum will insist she is called mom and will happen regardless. Your friends at www.organicbabe.com.au organic baby clothes

Linda - posted on 07/27/2009

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My stepchildren call me mom, cause I have been in their lives more than their bio. When I married their father they asked me what should they call me and I told them you can call me by my first name, whatever you are comfortable with. But no bad name they laughed and started calling me mom. If your stepdaughter wants to call you mom then let her, that is what she is comfortable with.

Michelle - posted on 07/27/2009

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I am in a similar situation, however, the boys see thier BM on a regular basis. All 3 call me Mommy Shell and that infuriates her. She constantly repremands them that I am not their Mom and they should not call me that. The oldest finally told me that Mommy says that he can't call me that anymore and I simply told him that I love him and that he could call me whatever was comfortable to him whether it be Shell or Mommy Shell. All 3 still choose to call me Mommy Shell. There will be times where they will call me Shell or just Mom and I do not make a big deal about it. Its all about what they want.

Sarah - posted on 07/27/2009

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My step daughter Jordan is 3 years old, and she was in a car accident with her mother about 3 months ago. Her mother died, but thank god she survived. So my fiance got custody of her. We didn't tell her what to call me. She started off by calling me by my name. We had actually only been around her about two or three times before the accident. She was kept from my fiance but his ex had a "change of heart" and when she did, we only saw her about 2 or 3 times since she lived about 4 hours away. The mother wasn't always around though. She was in & out of jail, and the accident they were in was actually a result of her drinking, and this little girl wasnt even in a car seat. We are so lucky to have her alive. So she started out by calling me by my name, but she started calling me mommy on her own. I'm sure hearing my 2 year old call me mommy is what made her start. But I was going to let her call me whatever she wanted. I felt bad at first because even though her mother passed away, she was still her mother. I don't think they had a very close relationship anyway with her not being the mom she shouldve been. If it were a different situation and she was still alive, I would still let Jordan call me what she wanted. I love her like shes my own, and would do anything for her.

Pam - posted on 07/26/2009

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My SD calls me by my first name. Her BM mom would get sooo upset. Anyway we don't have a normal relationship around here. The BM mom is very very insecure. I say the hardest thing next to being a parent is being a step parent.

Brittany - posted on 07/25/2009

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My older step daughter calls me Brittany, and I've told her that I'm okay with that...The younger one calls me mommy, but I've had her since she was 8 months old... Maybe I'm just going about it wrong, but whenever their bm told the younger one to call me Brittany, I about snapped her leg off! If she wants to call me mommy, then thats her business! BM hasn't been there for the runny noses and nightmares! Whenever she's old enough, if Elizabeth *younger one* decides to stop calling me mommy, yeah, its going to break my heart into a million little pieces, but again, its her business... Not up to bm to decide what they call us!!

Queenie - posted on 07/25/2009

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Well my step-children call me mommy when with the family. I have been in their lives since birth. Since turning 12 they call me by first name when they are around their mother or people who might know her. Completely unacceptable. I come from a very strict cultural background. We were raised not to EVER call an adult by their fist name, it is rude and disrespectful. I have taught young children to either put Miss in front of my name or call me Queenie which is a nickname but never ever by my first name. In the end you know how the child feels for you and you must do what makes you comfortable. My Godchildren call me Mommie Daph(my fist name is Daphne') Try coming up with a nickname

Wendy - posted on 07/24/2009

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she should call you what shes comphy with.when i was married before, my step son called me mom and i stopped him from it until i realized that hurt him, so i made a deal with his mom he since then called me mommy wendy and his mom, mommy katrina.but out of respect it did help to have the real mothers ok for him to call me what he did, so noone thought in anyway i was trying to replace her, good luck, stay strong let her call you whatever she chooses

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