Why

Jaime - posted on 07/08/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Just a question. Why is it always MY fault when my husband doesn't step up for his son?
I just can't understand what both my husband's problem and bm's problem is, there is a child's happiness at stake here. The child needs BOTH of there parents to shut up and respect one another. It is not a game of he did this, she did that. I don't think I will ever understand this.
Why do I always get dragged into another fight with bm about her situation with my husband regarding their son? I have tried to include him in our life, and I get constantly shit on?
I have said the exact same things I have ever said to bm to my husband and I don't get anywhere with either of them. Instead I end up being the home wrecker, and the evil sm that doesn't want my husband to see his other child. I would love for my daughters to see there brother more frequently than twice a year I would enjoy it myself.
I am very tired of being judged, talked about, downgraded and SHIT upon. I am not the one that so-called cheated, abused, neglected whatever else there is out there to be said. I know from the bottom of my heart my husband is an amazing father, he enjoys spending time with ALL of his children. But why am I talked about or punished for stating these facts.
Someone just tell me what I am supposed to do here???
Again I just don't get it girls?

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Jaime - posted on 07/10/2009

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Debbie I may just have to try that! Thanks for the suggestion. I don't know why M doesn't call either (half the time I have to remind him myself). I do know that there have been times he does call, leaves a message and never gets a call in return. Or if he is past 6pm the calls don't get answered either. Sorry I get very frustrated with it all, I would be having my girls call collect to talk to there dad if he wasn't calling them.

It is a very sad situation because you are right T is the only one missing out. My girls love there brother SO much and are always asking about him, they look at his pictures and want to call him or go and visit with him. Heck they even ask about his baby brother too. I still have a couple of gifts from the end of school year (passing gifts) I have yet to mail to them in hope we will get to see him. I think I may just have to make a road trip with the girls once again and see if we can somehow get the kids together for a bit.

Yes BOTH parents need to work together for the sake of their son, my husband especially.

Debbie - posted on 07/08/2009

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I dont know Jaime, I dont think it anything you can do that you havent done before. I just dont get why M doesnt call T and I dont blame H for being cheesed off. Just a thought...what if you call T on the sheduled times (which I think sucks should be able to call whenever) even if it is to let the girls talk to him. Maybe M will follow your lead???

You know as bad as Karen gets, she never stopped us from calling the girls, we didnt care what she had to say, even now that they arnt talking to us, I can still call, just wont get a happy response.

I feel bad for you Jaime you are a victim of circumstance, and you are bound to cop shit for being where you are. T is also a victim, absolutely none of this is his fault, yet he is the only one that pays the price. I recon both his parents need to pull their heads in and build a bridge, get over it!!!

Leaha - posted on 07/08/2009

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Been trying to stay out of it, but fill me in? What happened? I thought all was quiet? Long distance visitation CAN NOT be forced, exspecially when one parent or the other doesn't WANT the visitation to occur. (not pointing fingers but you know whom I mean *wink*) Just my opinion. Hey at least you get to see your SK twice a year, I haven't seen my oldest for a year and a half. LOL =) And was lucky to see her last year, not because my husband doesn't want to, but because her BM chooses to move every other month and change their phone numbers once a month!

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