behaiver issues

Ashley - posted on 05/07/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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So my 3 almost 4 year old step daughter has started some new behaivers and im going crazy. Im doing the best i can with the behaivers but im seriusly just getting to boiling point with her. Everytime i ask her to do something she dosent she sneeks away, she refuses to eat she sits and looks at her plate for 2 freaken hours she had six bites left and had only a realy small amount of food to start with anyway. Every chance she gets she is hitting or punching my son who isno angel and can be a brat too but he at least reacts when iget mad she just dosent care. My son is four too. I no her home life is a lot diffrnt than here but she is here a lot and may be a lot more soon and i need some coping stragadies before i lose my cool. The kids get time outs i expect them to eat i dont always make them eat everything but i do want them to eat enough so there not saying in ten min after dinner, can i have a snack, no damit i just fed you just drives me crazy. today i made bq chicken wraps cut one in half each got half and a small scop of patato salad, my son ate his wrap some of his potatos my step daughter NOTHING she snuck of into there room to play. I was so done i just too the food away and refused any snacks all see if she eats dinner. But why does it always have to be a batle im always the bad guy. her mom puts makeup on her adult makeup i dont so im the bad guy her mom is always trying to get my sd to ask me for some because she knows i hate it, once in awhile as a dress up play thing is fine in a couple more years but seriusly she is three and shows up with water proof makeup its crazy. Anyway i needed a rant thank you for reading any cooping skills you have gained i would realy be thankful

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Kaala - posted on 06/26/2012

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Most children who act out are doing it because it is their only way of "coping" with 2 separate environments. Since they are children, they can't speak about it the way we, as adults, can. Just have patience with her. If she sees that you freak out or break down everytime she comes over in make-up or everytime she doesn't eat, it will continue. You have to be strong. You have to be able to just shrug off the make-up. So you hate it. Fine. Next time, just say, "Ok sweetie, I want you to look like a little girl and not a doll so no make-up today ok?" then go wash it off. As for food, tell her when she gets it: "you don't eat this, you get no snack and no dessert after dinner." You will be surprised what will happen. Also, if that doesn't help, take away a toy, or some activity she enjoys if she doesn't eat. They respond to things like that instead of you getting upset or even looking upset.
Hope this helps. And I hope things get better.

MaryBeth - posted on 06/26/2012

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I am right there with you my step daughter is almost 5 and my son is 4. He listens so well but she doesn't at all and she always has an attitude with everyone. I reach my breaking point all the time with her and i just wanna give up. I am also seeking answers for her behavior.

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