Kristin - posted on 07/10/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )
My step daughter, who is 12, got her first period last week. she came up and told me and I was ecstatic! lol. i hugged her, squealed in excitement and jumped up and down (i think i was a little over enthused about it and more excited than she was). she was smiled ear to ear it was funny.
after the "little celebration" she asked if i had anything. i told her where i keep my pads and asked her if she knew what to do. when she said no, i told her to get a pair of her undies and a pad and i would demonstrate what to do. she brought me both and i put the pad on the underwear and explained what i was doing and sent her to the bathroom for her to change. i told her she should call her mom and tell her that she got her first period cause she would be excited to know, well she did and her mom said "good for you" and that's it.
well, later that day we went shopping for pads together. i showed her the different kinds and what i used. we ended up buying the ones i use and she was grinning the entire time lol.
well later that day she went back to her moms for the weekend. i would text her every now and then to see if everything was going ok with her.
on monday she came back to our house. i asked if her and her mom went shopping for pads over there and she told me that her mom bought her a a box of tampons and pads waiting for her when she got there. "o. i don't think it's a good idea for you to be using tampons right now" is what i said and continued to explain why. i asked if her mom showed her how to use them and she said her mom said "the directions should be in the box".
when i asked if her mom showed her how to use the pads or talked to her about her period and why she got it and what was happening to her body, she looked to the floor and said "no."
so i gave her a lesson on what was going on with her body and why this was happening and what was happening in her body when she gets a period. we ended up talking for over an hour.
now for the rant...
i was floored when my step daughter told me that her mom bought her tampons and said "the directions should be in the box". was shocked that she only said "good for you" when she broke the news to her excitedly on the phone. was amazed that her mom did not talk to her at all about what was going on with her body.
the same thing happened when my step daughter wanted to start shaving her legs. she asked her mom if she could and she said yes. well i ended up having to show her how to do it by shaving one leg for her and watching while she shaved the other. we both sat on the edge of the bathtub, rolled up our pants to our knees and i showed her and explained what i was doing.
i have a son who is only one year old, but i would think a mother of a teenaged daughter would want to explain to her ONLY DAUGHTER what to do during these milestones in her life and be there for her vs her step mother doing all of it.
i am excited that i get to show her this stuff, but i would not be offended and kind of expect her OWN MOTHER to do this stuff and not me. i am just pissed at the lack of concern and lack of direction from the mother.
any one else agree with me? or can anyone kind of justify the mother's actions?