Sabrina - posted on 08/28/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )
I have always been very responsible concerning sex, simultaneously using 2 or 3 methods of contraception every time - this is why I am 31 and have no kids yet. But I have been off my bipolar meds due to an allergic reaction and not thinking or acting so clearly, and now, Ms. Responsible is pregnant. I broke up with the father 3 weeks ago and have since found out not only that I am pregnant but also that he is a drug addict - trying to recover, but less than a month in. I am so confused about what to do. I know he is not good in my life but I am terrified about doing this alone. On the other hand, I know if I try to work things out with him I will just be creating more problems and stress for myself. I know I will be settling and I have always prided myself on not having to settle - I have respected myself enough to be picky. I know he is not good enough for me but I don't want to go through this pregnancy alone and I don't want my baby to not know its father. I work full time and am working on my degree, and as of right now that's stressful and draining enough. Now adding in a baby and the immense confusion about its father has me reeling. Part of me says suck it up and deal with his problems - maybe I can help him, and in the long run that will be healthy for my child. But my intellectual side knows that addiction recovery has to come from the addict himself. The other part of me says to just ditch him completely and stop letting him jerk me around - I don't need this stress (it's bad for the baby). Is that too selfish? I can't just think for myself anymore - now I have to think about how it will effect the baby. But it seems like a lose-lose situation whatever I pick. I can't believe I have been so careful my whole life just to end up carrying an irresponsible drug addict's baby and being alone at 31. I am so scared and confused. If anyone can offer some insight to a situation like this I would be so grateful.