Help, I'm scared to start school!

Lacey - posted on 01/12/2010 ( 21 moms have responded )

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I will be starting college again next week and I am terrified! I have a 6 and 7 year old in school and a 13 month old about to start daycare. I am in desperate need of suggestions on how to make all of this work.

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Tami - posted on 02/16/2010

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patience and prayer. Have your spouse help out as much as he can. Also have someone to be your support person to encourage to trudge on when times get tough. I'm a mom who returned to college. It's a great example to set for the kids, to see you do homework and set a goal. You're setting a wonderful example for them!

Aleysha - posted on 01/12/2010

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First of all, DON'T panic!! (Easier said than done, right?) I was thinking the same thing right before I went back to college. None of my kids are as old as yours are, though (the oldest just turned five back in October.), and I was enrolled in Distance Learning courses (Internet courses, which are more fast-paced) at my local community college. I must admit, it was hard at first, trying to keep up with assignments, while trying to potty-train a two year old.



One thing you've got going for you is that all three of your kids will be in care and I am sure this will be during the time you're in class, correct? If not, and you're taking courses online at home like I was, then the youngest is probably the one at home. Be sure to take a break from the computer sometimes. Another thing you can do is to help them understand what you're doing. Now, the two oldest will understand more than the youngest, of course. The best thing you can do is balance, although scheduling things (Like "Mommy's Homework Time") has worked also. You've got to figure out what works best for you, and go with it. It'll be a difficult adjustment at first, but it'll get better as you go. And again, DON'T PANIC! Children can sense tension very well, and if you become frazzled, they'll most likely follow suit.



But if none of this helps, you can always enroll THEM in college classes so they can see what "REAL" homework is. :) (Just kidding!) Good luck to you...I'm sure you'll have tons of success with school.

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Vanessa - posted on 09/07/2010

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I only have a two year old, but i started college amonth after my son was born. I was so afraid but was actually pretty smooth with the help of family. Both me and my husband were in college at the time. We would read our books to each other as we took care of baby, and even read to baby. i don't think he cared about Psychology basics, i killed two birds with one stone. Soothe the baby while studying. With some help from your partner, you should do just fine.

2 of the 3 are at school and your 13 month old can listen to you read. Picking them up and taking care of your other home priorities will be tricky, but once you find a flow, you will be golden!

Nicole - posted on 08/18/2010

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my daughter was 10 months when I went back to finish my degree, and knowing that I had amazing care for her made it that much easier for me to go back. Having your two oldest in school means you don't have to worry about them (too much), and hopefully you'll have a wonderful experience with your youngest in daycare.
The most difficult part for me was making sure that I could devote the amount of time needed to my studies as well as my child, husband and housework. Make sure you have your priorities set, obviously with family number one, school number two, and then if the house takes a beating during the week, so be it. there's always the weekend to put things back in order.

I'm now looking at the last 9 classes of my degree, and i'm planning on doing 5 this fall, and 4 in the spring... the hard part is that i'm expecting again in February, but i don't want to take any more time off from my degree, so i'm planning on taking my baby with me to classes (at least for the first few weeks) and then working with family, friends and daycare to cover the last few weeks of classes so I'll still finish on time.

I wish you all the luck in the world, but i'm sure that you're going to do fantastic!

Gina - posted on 08/17/2010

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Yeah every one is right, don't panic, the more stressed out you make yourself the harder it's going to be on you. I start school again next week and I have a 6 yr old stepson who just started first grade. I know it's gonna be hard for me to help him with his school work and spend time together but it's all about finding some kind of balance. Try and make a very well balanced schedule.

[deleted account]

my son was the same age when I went back and he's been doing great with me in school ... just go for it!

Rae - posted on 08/14/2010

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The first couple days are always the hardest until you get into a routine. You can do it, even if it means studying after bedtime. I also have a checklist of things to remember in the morning, because when I am tired from studying the night before I forget my books or my cell phone or somebody's lunch...you can do it!

Amra - posted on 02/16/2010

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I made the decision to return to school after 6 years and my son was almost 6 months. I was TERRIFIED! I have some other personal reasons and problems with panic attacks and the like so it was difficult already and was magnified by being a new mother as well. I still have a hard time sometimes, but remember you are doing this for your family's future and it's liberating to be doing something for yourself as well. Build a "support" network of friends and family, don't be afraid to use school resources and ask for help if you need it. Finding your own balance of school and home life is important. And it's very helpful to utilize a sitter a couple hours a week for school work so you can dedicate your time to your children the rest of the time (otherwise you end up trying to do both all day or night, or both and not being able to focus on either..or losing sleep which makes everything more difficult.) Remember to keep your goals in sight and that you can do it, you are not alone out there!

Liisa - posted on 02/12/2010

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What Kenzy said is so true...try to get some stuff done while on campus because once you're at home it is so difficult and I have a 16 year old...so you'd think I'd have more freedom, right??? Nope...He's still needy and it's a real juggling act to make sure I get all of my schoolwork done AND take care of him. Besides, my son is special needs (ADHD and ODD), so that makes it challenging in itself. But it can be done. And it's so rewarding. It feels great to do something for yourself. And you're also setting a great example for your kids!

Kenzy - posted on 02/09/2010

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i went back to school when my daughter was 2 weeks old. school is my break away from everything baby! i can have adult interaction and take care of my business so that i will be able to better provide for my daughter in the long run. it can be challenging sometimes tho with the work load n having to be a single mom when i get home, but i just think of how much better life will be when im done, n hopefully that will be soon i apply to my program this month n if all goes well i will be graduating next spring. GOOD LUCK in what ever u are studying, just remember you will get way more done if u spend a few extra hours on campus cuz if u come home its not about u anymore!!!

Lynda - posted on 02/08/2010

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I think my kids only know me as a '"going to school mom"... I started my associate nursing program when my husband was in Afghanistan so that I could have something to occupy my mind. The boys were 4 and 5 years old. I had a friend watch them who did it to help me out and they already knew her children.. It was great. Ray came home and I worked a few years and now I am back to get my Masters in Nursing as a Family Nurse Practitioner.. The boys do the afterschool thing and do fine.. We try to keep a schedule but sometimes it does not work and that is ok.. Sometimes it can get chaotic but do not worry.. I suggest getting a monthly calendar that you can see when exams and quizzes are coming up along with other assignments so that you can fix your family schedule to fit in times to do extra study time. It is nice to have someone available to watch the kids so that you can take off to the library or stay at home to study or homework.. Needless to say-- you can be a mom and go to school at the same time. Keep your mind focused on the end results and it will come.. Good luck..

Missy - posted on 02/07/2010

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I can honestly say it is scary. I was okay when I first had my baby because I had family that would help me. That and it was my first classes so they were pretty simple stuff that I learned before high school. Then, I got married and my husband and I took turns doing our school work and taking care of my son. My son was a week old when I started classes. I was scared and emotional and I cried whenever there was any kind of pressure on me. I passed all those classes and am now a single mom of two with less help. It scares the crap out of me!
I'm learning time management so much better and am struggling but getting better.
You have two kids in school and one goes to daycare? Are you participating in distance learning or on campus?

Joan - posted on 02/03/2010

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Like all the moms out here stated "don't panic" or stress out. As long as you know what your goals are and your priorities are set, then you're all set. I know how hard it is to juggle family life, school and work. I babysit two older kids in the morning during school days and sometimes in the afternoon or weekend. My son goes to daycare twice a week for a total of 10 hours and I take him to his gymboree class on the days he doesn't have daycare. I decided to go back to school just before he turned 1 and since it's an online class it makes things a lot easier. My husband is also a great help who helps me here and there. I catch up on my readings while my son is at daycare as well as post on class discussions. When he goes to sleep at night then that's when I get some of my schoolwork done. It's all about time management. Best wishes on your school.

Alysha - posted on 02/03/2010

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It's true, you shouldn't panic or freak out. It will be stressful while you and your family are adjusting to the new schedule. However, everything will fall into place. I have a 3 year old, a disabled husband, and I work and go to school, and to be perfectly honest, it's the best thing I could have done. Now my 3 year old is more excited than ever about going to school. It also makes the time we spend together that much more special. I also think your older children will respect you for it. It can help motivate them too.

Lisa - posted on 02/01/2010

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I will agree with the "groove" comments. It's rough getting started but I took my first classes that I knew would be easy for me to get into the homework and light on homework just to break myself in and then went from there. It's a balance and no one way is right. But you're Mom you can do it all :) Don't forget to take time for yourself with no responsibilities grabbing coffee/drinks with a friend on a tuesday night for an hour is amazingly refreshing

Lisa - posted on 01/31/2010

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It won't be an easy task but it will be worth it. I started back to school when my daughter was older than your children. I work full time and take classes at night. It was difficult at first but it's all about time management. It helps that I have a wonderful supportive husband. On the nights I do not have class, my daughter and I have study time where we do our homework together. It has been a wonderful experience that has taught my daughter the importance of studying and education. Work that needed quiet time so that I could concentrate was done when everyone went to bed, so it can be exhausting. Just pace yourself. I have learned that more than two classes is too much to handle, I took three classes one semester and all I did was work, school, and study. My family and the house suffered because it was just too much at once.

Don't forget to give yourself a break. If you don't you will burn out. Just remember, It can be done as many women can attest.

[deleted account]

Hey girl,

Don't Panic! It will be alright. My best advise would be to pase yourself. Don't overload yourself with too many classes. Take what you feel comfortable with. For you first semester don't take more than one science. They can be your hardest classes. Later you may have too, but by that time you should be in the groove of school. Talk to your adisors at school. They can really help support you. Let your professors know you are a mom. They are usually parents themselves and will understand. Be organized. It will help you stay on track. Do a little school work every day for every class. I am in my second semester of my sophmore year in pre nursing classes and have a 3.756 GPA. Girl just pace yourself and ask for help when you need it. You can do this! Good luck!

Tabetha - posted on 01/21/2010

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I actually enjoy my time at school, its quiet adult conversation, and I don't feel guilty about doing it because I know it's going to make things better for my kids. I have a 1 and 2 yo, work 50 hrs a wk and work on my PhD on my off days. The 6 and 7yo can help with small chores around the house and you can do your homework while they do theirs. Importantly you will be able to show them how important school is. Post good grades on the fridge from each person to reward good behavior, even when it's your test you will feel good about it.

Camille - posted on 01/21/2010

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I just went back after being off for two semesters because I had my third child. It is hard going back to school, especially if you work also. I work part-time with flexible hours, so it isn't too bad. Like the other girl said on here....."Once you get in the groove, it's not bad"
After that first day back in school, you'll be wondering what the heck you were soooo worried about.
It will take a big adjustment at first, but you will get in a routine and things will run smoothly...Well, as smooth as things can be with children...LOL

Sabrina - posted on 01/17/2010

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be persistent.. remember ur doing this for ur children to have a better future and ur setting a great example for them. it was so hard for me to start back too.. my daughter was about that same age when she started daycare and she cried for a month or two (and so did i) but we worked though it as a team.. its still not easy but over a year later i can honestly say its all worth it.. good luck and stay strong

Ashley - posted on 01/14/2010

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Make every minute count.



I usually do the family thing until the kids are in bed at night (8:00pm). Then I study for a couple of hours. I also study during nap time.



My oldes is 8 so she doesn't nap so we do quiet time for a couple of hours.



Leave the major house work to the weekend if necessary.



Once you get into the groove of it its not so bad.



Good Luck!

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