My 11 year old daughter does not want me to have a boyfriend. What do i do?

Lyndsay - posted on 11/04/2009

You need to have a talk with her. Let her know that you do everything in your power to make sure that she is happy and all of her needs are fulfilled, and she's getting old enough now to give you that same courtesy. It is selfish of her to keep you from being happy, and if this is something you feel you'd like to have in your life you should make that known to her. But following this you have to continue to give her the love and attention she's seeking, and you have to make time for her and make her feel special and important.

Sara - posted on 11/03/2009

Well, to be perfectly honest, I was a child in that same situation. And let me tell you, I had alot of hatred towards my mom for many many years because she essentially didnt take my feelings or the feelings of my siblings into consideration, so the basic fact that you are doing the opposite is very commendable. However, today as an adult, I have been in a similar situation as you. What I did was keep my family and my relationship separated until my relationship was strong enough to handle my chlidren, but also when my boys actually wanted to meet my boyfriend. And when they met they fell in love with the idea of having a "dad" around all the time, or for my boyfriend to have a girlfriend and two rowdy boys just like him & his brothers as a child. After 7 years we're still going strong. In the long run, your kids & partner will know you made the right decision.

Kayliecia - posted on 10/29/2009

I totally remember them days with my mom, eventually it didn't matter to me anymore it hurt me to see my mom with another person, it was like she was paying more attention to her boyfriends...that hardly lasted. and i think that you should probably, pay attention to her and let her know you love her and that she comes first before anyone else. I remember i was a little devil and i made it known too, i did some horrible things to my moms boyfriends. Good Luck!

Melissa - posted on 10/27/2009

I would take her out somewhere, maybe to dinner, and I would talk to her. Let her know that she is your everything and that no one, man or woman, will ever take her away. And that she is your number 1. Then let her know how you feel being alone. And just tell her, that yes you have her, but your alone on a different level. You feel alone on an adult level. You need a man in your life that will help out around the house and that would want to be in her life as well. Let he know that she always comes first, and if there was ever a man who didn't treat her like a young lady, then he's out the door. Because she was here first, and she will be there in the end. Let her feel that she will be a part of the relationship also, and that she has to like the man as much as you do. Just talk to her. Best of luck!!