my baby dont seem to want me anymore

Tiffany - posted on 02/04/2010 ( 9 moms have responded )

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i started school a week ago. when i come home it seems like my son wants nothing to do with me. it upsets me so bad because when my husband would come home from work he would scream for his daddy to pick me up. i actually started crying. and then i was doing homework and my husband made the comment to the baby that i didnt have time for him anymore. i know he was only joking but it deeply upset me.

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Mackenzie - posted on 02/18/2010

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:( I am so sorry!
I hate it when husbands joke about stuff that actually hurts and they just don't get it.
It sounds like baby is having a little trouble adjusting to you being gone, my advice would be to spend lots of time "attachment parenting" when you are home, have you tried wearing your baby in a sling or carrier when you are home doing stuff you need to get done there? it helps alot with attachement, also see about online classes or going part-time so you can be with baby more. Good luck hun!

Vicky - posted on 02/15/2010

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I know its hard being away from your child when you're going to school. I feel your pain because I'm in that stage right now. What I do may help you out just think of it as your working to give your son a better life and when you come home from school just put down all your books for an hour or so and play with him cuddle him and let him know you love him. Then when he goes down for a nap/sleep for the night then do your homework. It works for me as far as your husband goes just sit him down and talk to him and tell him that you would appreciate it if he wouldn't say things like that because it hurts your feelings. He should understand and on weekends (if you can) take your son somewhere you and your husband and spend the day with him. Your son will get used to it after awhile it just takes time and patience.

Joye - posted on 02/13/2010

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Hey there Tiffany! I am a full time student as well but my son is 27 months now. Are there pieces of clothing or maybe a voice recorder that your husband can play while you are gone. Also, please it is very important to address your husnband on his unsupportive comments (whether they are joking or not). The courage to return to school takes much effort especially with an infant at home. Not only that, you are returning to school for your own personal reasons and to better the family (financially that is). So, encourage your husband to talk to the baby about you while you are gone and start showing more positive words of praise and encouragement. Best Wishes! ~Joye~

Maggie - posted on 02/13/2010

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dont worry, like the other girls have said you'll always be number one to your baby. there is a bond between mother and child that no one else can understand or every replace. spend every moment you can with him. he may get upset not because he doesnt know you but i guess it's his way of showing he's missed you.

Jennifer - posted on 02/12/2010

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Tiffany, your son is always going to need you. Your his mommy! My son is pretty much the same way. When it comes to play time, all he wants his Daddy. But when there thick, or not feeling good. They want Mommy. When there to tired, they want Mommy. Mommy makes everything better! Daddy is there there for fun and play time! Its just a stage, trust me. He will go through this stage many times while going up!! Good luck!
Its good that your going back to school! A lot Moms wont, or cant after having a there first baby! Your a good mom, remember that!

Adrienne - posted on 02/09/2010

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You will always be number 1 to your child...and Dad shouldnt say those things...when I went back to school when my oldest was 12 I had to move away for 8 months and my girls had to live with their dad for a short time...I missed my girls like crazy...my ex husbands mom was telling people I had abandoned my girls...this didnt effect my youngest as she is very emotionally secure however my 12 year old heard it and she took it to heart...she only recently told me(she is 19) that she had overheard her grandma...this caused alot of damage and issues with my eldest daughter we have repaired much but it has left things in a way that hurt her...other family members need to watch what they say around the children...and need to realize that even though we are moms we have lives as well...and should be able to pursue school with out haveing anyone say things to our kids...about abandonment or selfishness...

Kate - posted on 02/07/2010

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My daughter is beginning to do the same thing. I asked her ped about it and he said that its because as a mom, we are so familiar that the baby wants to discover new faces. Its very difficult to deal with but just keep in mind that you are, and always will be, number 1 to your child. Like Sara said, spend as much quality time with him as possible, the other stuff can wait.

Anj - posted on 02/06/2010

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For a start even if your hubby was joking that is so not on! Take him aside and say so.

Just ejoy the time you have with your son when you are with him, and don't beat yourself up!

Sara - posted on 02/05/2010

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Tiffany I feel you... When I went back to work after I had my daughter it was really hard for the both of us. She would cry when I left her with the baby sitter but it all gets better just keep up your hard work and try to work homework around your sons schedule. I do online schooling to become a teacher and I do all my homework, clean house, and do laundry all while they are either napping or out for the night. It is hard but it'll become easier as it all gets going.

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