My little story

Kristin - posted on 11/17/2008 ( 10 moms have responded )

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My name is Kristin, 27, and I'm from Minnesota USA. I'm currently a Social Worker in geriatrics, but before that I was a child advocate at a Domestic Violence Shelter. I am currently married to the most amazing understanding man I've ever met. Someone who breaks down doors to get to domestics in progress and begs women to seek help (yup a copper). And I have two amazing little girls Belly Button 4 and Goober 2. My story before that wasn't so pretty. When I was 13 I was strangled by a boyfriends best friend. Then I met my ex-fiance when I was 15 and he was 20. He raped me when I was 17. I was engaged by 18 and he told me where to go to college, who to talk to, what to wear. It got worse to the point I couldn't have access to my accounts, pick my classes, stay in my dorm. I was a social work major and knew this was not right. I finally called it off when I was 19. He continued to use me, but adventually I cut off all contact. He strangled me and told me he had the right to rape me. That was the wake up call for me. I had nothing tying him to me. I left for good...I hear he is married..I pray for his wife everyday. I am amazed by you awesome women who stood up and left! You have a testimony and I applaud you for sharing it!

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10 Comments

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Kristin - posted on 11/26/2008

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Thank God that there is evidence to support you if you have to go back to court. I call that a blessing! I know how hard it is to have your children have visitation with an abuser. I saw the outcomes when I was a child advocate. I will keep you all in my prayers.

Sharon - posted on 11/23/2008

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Oh heather!

That's just wonderful news! It's about time someone did that!



Stay strong. You are doing a wonderful job with your daughter and yourself.



Shaz

Heather - posted on 11/20/2008

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IM SO EXCITED!!! I love my attorney she stop talking to him or setting up any form of visitation!!! She said he had been making incoherent phone calls to her so she has all the proof she needs and on top of that Hayli's therapist is backing me!! So if he files something then i go back to court with all the legal ammo ready but for now i dont have to deal with him period!! But please pray for me to continue the strength i have right now so i dont call or give in to his control ever again, cause im getting stronger by surrounding my self with great friends old and new and an incredibly supportive family!! Thanks to all my new friends here... It has helped so much to be in this supportive of a group of stronger than we realize woman!

Nikki - posted on 11/19/2008

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hum.. god there are some evil guys out there! I'm glad to hear you got out. stay strong!

Sharon - posted on 11/18/2008

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Hi Kristin,

Thanks for sharing your story. You have incredible courage an di am so happy that you have the life you deserve now! We all deserve happiness and i hope that one day we can all have a happy ending.



Heather,

I pray for you that your legal system sees what this abuse is doing to you and your daughter and DO THE RIGHT THING! I can't understand why the law would see your ex's behaviour as ok. It's just not! Can you look into a protection order?



Love Shaz

Heather - posted on 11/18/2008

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i believe in God very much but i have been very angry with him lately, i just dont know why he cant make the courts keep me and my daughter safe i just want to feel safe enought o life a half-way normal life

TREON - posted on 11/18/2008

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wow, that relly sucks. that part about your child being in that situation that's really messed up, because no child deserve to be in that situation.here in florida they don't play that. you would have been able to get a restraining order against him and the courts would have made it where you can arrange visitation rights for the father to see the child w/out you being around him and if he's doing it to your child as well he wouldn't be able to see her. i'm, sorry to hear that. it never gets better, unless GOD has come into that persons life, other than that it will only result in someone getting seriously hurt or killed. all you can do is pray and ask GOD to save him, because if he's living on the outside ofthWILL of GOD, you have to expect almost anything from him.

Heather - posted on 11/18/2008

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but for some of us if there are no brusies the legal system does nothing. and if you have a child with that person as i do they let you down even more because they let that child be in the situation also. i dont deserve the verbal abuse and neither does my 6yo daughter but we go through it every day because in the state of Kansas they beleive in family preservation. they think no matter what dads have the right to mentally fuck up the mom and child. hense, my 6yo has been going to counseling for the last year but they seem to think he will change and get help which he says he will but never does. i have one of the best attorneys in my area they call her the Shark and she has done everything she can but what now, sit around and what for him to show up since the court said he could then what

TREON - posted on 11/17/2008

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WELL, I THANK GOD THAT YOU ARE NO LONGER IN THAT MESS. THAT VERY THING YOU WENT THROUGH GOD ALLOWED IT FOR A REASON, BUT I SEE IT ONLY MADE YOU STRONGER. I'VE BEEN THROUGH DOMESTIC VIOLENCE GROWING UP SO I KNOW THE FEELING, AND I'M GLAD IT HAPPENED BECAUSE NOW I'M ABLE TO HELP OTHERS TO SEEK HELP.

THINK OF IT LIKE THIS IF YOU NEVER WENT THROUGH IT,HOW CAN YOU HELP SOMEONE THAT'S GOING THROUGH NOW, HOW ACN YOU STAND UP AND TELL YOUR STORY.

I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU I AM SO PROUD OF YOU AND MAY GOD CONTINUE TO BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

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