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Custody battle in the mix! Messy stuff need some advice UGH

Cariann - posted on 06/08/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My daughters father is in jail and has visitation, ive been putting it off for a couple weeks but now i am having to go back to court. Im trying to end that. i am not with him anymore and i dont want my daughter to be either, i know he has a right. Im also trying to get sole custody. what should i do? Im thinking d i have to let her father have visitation till it is legally changed. What am i going to have to go through to get custody??

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Giovanna - posted on 06/12/2012

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Well why wouldn't you want your daughter to have a relationship with her father? That isn't fair to her, unless he's in jail for a reason such as violence or substance abuse, something that would make visitation immediately halt. Just because you're not with him anymore doesn't mean she has to suffer. I've been broken up with my baby's dad since March, and even though we fight incredibly, we both know OUR SON is the priority and deserves both parents in his life. So we just suck it up and deal with it.
As far as custody goes, you already have sole custody. He has visitation, not any form of custody. You're her custodial parent, getting visitation revoked is what you're talking about.
But you really need to just sit down and think before you do anything drastic. Is his not being with you a good reason, in the eyes of both your daughter and the law, to not allow him to see her? Think about it this way. When your daughter is 16 and crying because she thinks her daddy isn't in her life because he left, what will you tell her? "Oh, we broke up so I wouldn't let him see you." That is not fair to her.

Kelina - posted on 06/11/2012

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is he in jail for anything dangerous? Do you think he's an unfit father? Do you think he's a danger to your little girl once he gets out? These questions are best posed to a lawyer but make sure you're taking her dad away for a good reason.

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