hardest thing about being a teen mom?

[deleted account] ( 40 moms have responded )

What have you found to be the hardest thing about being a teen parent?

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Carmen - posted on 07/29/2012

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the hardest thing is the name calling, the steroyotypes that people have about teen parents. people dreagging my daguhter into fights, saying things like 'you have alot of money from sueing the condom company' one kid at school even tried to punch me in the stomach. but im learning to ignore them because i know im a good mom and that my daughter is the best thing i ever did.

Sarah - posted on 12/23/2010

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The hardest thing for me is how people look down on me just because i am a young mom and how because i'm a young mom people expect certain things of me that they don't expect from other moms. Such as other moms when they say they "need a break" or have to find a sitter its no big deal but if i want to go out to the movies or run some errands i am told i'm a mom now so i don't get to do that stuff any more.

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Martha - posted on 10/24/2013

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I love ma son... but its hard to give up ma old life... not so much about the party scene but I want to date and do my stuff anytime Ill like not sure if its normal feeling now tht Im soon going to turn 21. I paid ma rent and my bills still live at home though have a part time job attend full time school nd even manage to have my own child care. At the weekends I like to spend 1 whole day wit ma new bf... nd they say its wrong .... is that right. or am I doing wrong? being a young mom is hard.

Julia - posted on 09/17/2013

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Trying to keep up with school an now out on my own. so to the girls who think life sucks living with your parents.... Enjoy it! You don't have to cook, clean on your own, or worry about that first set of bills that are going to come oh so neatly folded in that white envelope. Word of advice, make sure you're mental stable as a teen and a mom or expecting mom before you throw yourself out there because you think your parents are "annoying". I'm doing well on my own but that's because of my support system.

Latrice Denise Frazier - posted on 02/07/2013

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the waking up at nite and to see him cry just because he is sleepy and fighting it

[deleted account]

All the negative comments you get from people.
Pretty much all of the time they don't even have a clue!
It's obvious they're not/wasn't teen parents otherwise they wouldn't judge so harshly! :(
The other thing is when you're friends are all out having fun, and you're not.
I don't mind, because my baby comes first.
But there has been nights where you just want a break from it all, and you can't.

Courtney - posted on 12/27/2010

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I've found the put-downs, and comments i've recieved for being a young mum. I freedom has changed but not so much. Lost my whole family excludingmy brother and nan but im loving being a mum doesnt bother me that im younger then alot of other mums i still enjoy my time just as any other person would:)

Kayla - posted on 12/27/2010

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The hardest part for me was not being able to get out of the house and hang out with my friends. I kept my pregnancy to myself and to a few friends since i was 15 at the time and i knew my parents would freak. After having my son I lost most of my friends because their parents did not want them to be around me and I changed schools which was very hard. I was in the 10th grade when i found out i was pregnant and I was just getting to do all the fun things like driving, being with my friends all the time. I was use to going out every weekend with my girls and going over to my boyfriend's house but once my son came that all changed. My parents did not trust me at all I had to gain my trust back with them. My son is 2 now and i can't image my life without him i would be bored out of my mind ha :)

Emilie - posted on 12/23/2010

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The worse thing for me is being categorized in the teenage mum group, all because we get the stupid selfish few who smoke and drink through their pregnancy and live in disgusting houses because they are too lazy to look after their children or even try breastfeeding, anyway I could go on but I’ve only met a few good young mums I must admit.
The other problem is, is that my partner and myself found it hard to cope with money because we just wanted to be a normal supporting family but because of our young age we obviously got the low wage so it was annoying to try to afford the rent, bills, children’s outings and the bits and bobs you need to support a family of four weekly, but other than that I enjoy being young and bringing up my children from the age of 16 years old.

Haley - posted on 12/13/2010

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For me I think it was the adjustment to not having freedom, my boyfriend is still able to go and do whatever he wants but I am restricted at home with the baby, which isn't bad but I never thought i would be going to school then working 7 hours and have to lay the baby down just so I can get up to do it the next morning while the dad can go live life up...

Zuliam - posted on 12/13/2010

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going to school full time and caring for my daughter, the father at times not being around as much i thought he would, no freedom, not being able to financially support her on my own, the stress of living with my mom

April - posted on 12/13/2010

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For me it was feeling like im not the one actually supporting my daughter... i lived with my parents couldnt get a good job to support us, so i started to live off the government... was like that for a few months and finally i decided to do something for us.. i ended up joining the navy. was a tough decision definately was heartbraking to leave my daughter for the time i had to leave her but definately a great great decision. i make more than enough money to support us now and she is in good hands till i get home. it was most satisfying when i was the one able to buy her every little thing she could ever want or need... i would say for any moms out there wanting to provide a great future for their family give the military a look... best decision i ever made. :)

Mandy - posted on 12/13/2010

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Judgmental people. I don't miss anything at all from my life before my daughter, my parents messed up and I just wanted to make my own family and do a better job. But I do hate what older parents can get away with behind closed doors, and the open dissaproval that younger, yet much more responable, mothers can get.

Elaina - posted on 12/11/2010

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I would say the hardest part is the strain it puts on my relationship, and the fact that after i gave birth i lost a lot of my friends. i dont have much freedom. but i love my daughter more than life itself. as long as she happy that all i care about

Christina - posted on 12/11/2010

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The hardest thing for me was the criticism. I didn't have a support system and that was very difficult. It was just me and my baby. Ten years later, I'm 28 and he is 10yrs old (and the oldest of five) and people still think he's my little brother.

MILEDYZ - posted on 12/09/2010

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trying to support ur children alone and being a teen mom is very hard... sometimes you need more patience and being that we are young it is so hard to do..... but i learned through the years , so better and better each year

Toni - posted on 12/09/2010

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the hardest thing for me would be sacrificing everything that I wanted, so my son was looked after.
when my son was born, me and his dad were living in a 1 bedroom flat, and we knew we couldnt stay in that place for too long. so we found a larger rental that we could afford. The only problem was it is minimum of a 5 hour drive from everyone we know and care for. We have to budget everything to make sure we can save money for christmas. We cannot just go and visit people.
It is difficult, but all worth it when I see my beautiful boy smiling at me and giving me big cuddles. As long as he is healthy and happy, I know Im doing that right thing.

Allison - posted on 12/09/2010

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The looks people give, especially older people ain't great, but I think mostly the hardest thing would be the stress it causes and the BIG what if...what if I hadn't gotten pregnant? would things be that much different? Would me and the father had been together as long as we were? to me that's hard...not that i'd change my little girl for ANYTHING!! but sometimes you have to wonder

Brandee - posted on 12/09/2010

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honestly the hardest thing about being (well use to, im 20 now) a teen mom is simply juggling your life. you have a child to take care of yet you have to balance your family, love life (if you stayed with the father or have a significant other), schooling, work, and still meet some sort of YOU time. Its all a balancing act thats extremely difficult to keep up with without letting one slip and it tends to be you time that is sacrificed.

Sarah - posted on 12/09/2010

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Hardest thing for me is the fact that i can't drive. In Australia you have to be 18 to get a license and must have done 120 hours of practice first, which is just impossible with a baby.

Sheree - posted on 12/08/2010

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The hardest thing for me was, losing all my friends, They all didnt wanna hang out with someone who had a kid tagging alone... And having to live my partents till i could get my own place...
But it all comes down to my daughter is my life and i wouldnt change a thing about it!

Robin - posted on 12/08/2010

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TO me the hardest things are:: the lack of income to take care of my son. The lack of education I have to futher teach him. I dislike the looks I get from people. I dislike how some people ask if he is my little brother, and I tell them he is MY son, and they kinda snicker amongst themselves, and all I can do is laugh at them. I wouldn't change a single hair on my sons head, or the timing he came. Yes I wish i were a little bit more financialy stable. but things happen for a reason, and I love my son more the anyon or anything in this world!!!

Tessa - posted on 12/07/2010

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people assuming that because you are young you are a bad mother. people making comments to me about how im too young to be a mother, telling me Ill never be able to give her the best in life etc etc. I dont care though, I know im a damn good mum!

Jazzmine - posted on 12/07/2010

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My son is 4 months and i am 16, the hardest thing is keeping your relationship strong its easy to forget what you once had because your so busy with your baby. but good advice ladies always try to keep your relationship strong and try going on dates or include the dad in activities with you and the baby!

Samantha - posted on 12/07/2010

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I was 16 when i got pregnant. I am now turning 18 in a couple of days and my son devan is almost 10 months old. Being a single teen mom is very hard. While living with my mom, step-dad and their new daughter, i have to try and depend on them to watch devan so i can go to school and get my highschool diploma. I rarely find time to do homework and I am running behind. I also am in a hard financial position right now. I get about $350 from the government a month, which just covers devans food, diapers and wipes. now i also have to think of christmas presants for him. I have absolutly no time to even THINK about getting a job right now. Being a teen mom is very hard but it IS worth it. I have a beautiful son that makes me smile every day. I am so grateful for having my mom and grandmother help me out right now, but its hard knowing i cant support my own son. One really hard thing i had to deal with in the beggining was being looked at strangely for being so young but I have gotten over that now. I am a good mother to my son and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. I just find it sad how fast people are to judge.

Kara - posted on 12/07/2010

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Managing your time if you choose to work and/or finish school. {I did both} You are forced to miss out on alot of things that you wouldnt have had too if you were older and it is hard. The other is giving up much of your life before you lived it. The only after school activity that I get to go to after my daughter was born was my sr. prom. Its hard to see other people your age doing such carefree things, not having to worry about money, work, or responsibility while you are raking and scraping change to buy diapers and holding a life in your hands. Its difficult when you go from not even having to take care of yourself to having to take care of yourself and a little miracle. However, I will tell you that it is hard, probably one of the hardest things you will ever do, but if you stick it out... it is worth EVERYTHING that you went through to get it.

Jessica - posted on 12/06/2010

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the hardest thing for me was money. like my husband and i knew we wanted to have kids but not right away so we didn't get a chance to save up money for it. also you "miss out" so to speak on what other teens are doing, like school and stuff. i mean you can do school but its a lot more stressful and everything.

Amanda - posted on 12/06/2010

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I would have to say that when I was 16 and I got pregnant the hardest part was adjusting to not being able to just go and do what I wanted to do. I was so used to making plans, not really caring what time they were, and after my son was born, I had to get used to working around his schedule, and it was not what I was used to lets just say that! I had to find a sitter if I needed to go somewhere like the drs office if I knew it was going to be a long time, so yes that was definetly the hardest for me. But now I'm so used to it it's like normal! Lol

O'tia - posted on 12/06/2010

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The hardest thing I've found is having to really and truly grow up! I couldnt be selfish and NOTHING was about me anymore...if I have something it belongs to Cheirie too. There is no more mine, or what about me? It's all about her and her's! The criticism doesnt bother me now because I've grown up...everyone can suggest what they please BUT at the end of the day I AM RAISING HER AND I DO AS I PLEASE.

Devon - posted on 12/06/2010

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comments and looks. they always ask my mom if its her child when they clearly can see me taking care of her. but im strong and i got through it with the support of my daughters smile and my loving fiance

Britnie - posted on 12/05/2010

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the hardest thing for me was having to live with my parents still it was very stressful things were easier once i moved out of their house

Amy - posted on 12/05/2010

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Knowing that I have to take care of my son while still living with my mother and step-dad. I love Aiden, but I wish I could be the one putting a roof over his head, and being the one to pay for everything he needs. I appreciate everything my parents do for me, but I feel like I'm not accomplishing anything for my son while I'm still under their roof.

Ambyr - posted on 12/05/2010

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I would say the lack of freedom. I have 2 kids and I am 19 yrs old. My daughter is 1 yr and 8 months and my son is 8 months. I love them to death but sometimes I wish it was easier to get out of the house. Just to be able to get up and leave when ever I want like I use to.

Jessica - posted on 12/05/2010

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Basically being forced to live with my parents. They make my life a living hell. The best thing that ever happened to me (before my daughter obviously lol) was going to college and finally getting out of their house. But then college is the reason I got as far into drugs and alchy as I did and now I'm blessed with a precious baby girl! She's my lifesaver.

I also think more is expected out of teen mother's than someone who has their first baby at an "acceptable" age. For teen mother's, its all about us not being mature enough or financially responsible. Maturity doesn't always reflect your age. I know plenty of late-20-somethings who should never procreate lol

Jessie - posted on 12/05/2010

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the looks, the comments, the change in life and my relationship goin to pot. bottom line i love my son and thats all that matters. i do wish my life was better tho.

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