how often do you get to go out??

Houda - posted on 01/20/2013

I don't have family to babysit and my husband I don't see him that much so I feel stuck in the house :(

Casey - posted on 08/03/2011

My boyfriend and I usally get to go out together like once a month. I do go over to a friends house or she comes here for a few hours once a week. Have a blended family consisting of 3 kids and my boyfriend working 12 hour days I need a little break. I never come home drunk and am usally home at a reasonable time. Nothing much just some girl talk and time ti bitch. It does us all good.

Kayla - posted on 07/30/2011

My son is 15 months and I have gone out twice. once with the father and once to a superbowl party...

Kellie - posted on 07/19/2011

I am 21 years old. I am a young mother of a 16 month old baby. I DONT go out! My husband and i are happy laying in bed watching movies eating leftover chinese. We dont club bc were parents now. You gave that up the day you decided to have your child. Find a family member to watch your child and go out to dinner or see a movie not party or club! YOUR MOTHERS! Its young ladies like your selves that make mature mothers like me look bad.

Brooke - posted on 07/18/2011

My daughter will be 4 in a couple weeks and I go out maybe once a week and usually that's just with my husband so we can reconnect before beginning a new week. I rarely go out with friends let alone visit a night club.

Kristina - posted on 06/07/2011

Not to clubs. I never been a club girl. Maybe to the movies or out to eat but that's about it.

Rebecca - posted on 06/06/2011

from the time i got pregnant til now which my daughter is 3 months i have not gone out once by myself or with friends :( i was on partial bed rest while i was pregnant so i couldnt go out and now that im not pregnant i spend all my time with my little one. sometimes i feel like i need just a bit of a break but im afraid to leave my daughter with anyone for the night.

Jules - posted on 05/27/2011

My husband and i go out seperately at least once a month. And we also try and go out together at least once a fortnight. Neither of us like the club/pub scene and with 3 kids money is sometimes a bit tight

Allissa - posted on 05/24/2011

I get to go out about 3-4 times a month without my daughter, but I am not allowed to leave until she is in bed and sleeping, and I have to be home before she wakes up. If I want to go out and still have my "free nights," I take her with me. Everyone that I know adores my daughter and don't mind if she tags along. She's the clown when we go out. She's how me and my single friends meet new people!

Chrystal - posted on 05/18/2011

I do my best to make some "me time" at least twice a month. I think that it is important to make sure that you don't lose yourself in being mom. I used to never go out and I was a very unhappy person. I think that making sure that I make time for me is important and helps me to be a better mother.

Ashley - posted on 04/28/2011

ever since i found out i was pregnant and had my daughter who is 20 months today ive only gone out when my daughter was staying by her fathers and most of the time when she was there i would just stay in. ive heard of young mothers going out all the time and i couldnt imagine being away from my daughter all that time.

Emma - posted on 04/28/2011

I had my son at 21. I went out a handful of times for the first year of his life. I would go out later than everybody else so I could get him sorted for bed first and would be back in by 11pm because I was just literally THAT exhausted from having a young baby!
I split with his dad 8 months ago and have managed to claw back some form of social life away from my son. He will be turning 2 soon and it is much easier for me to go out once a week or so. He had terrible separation anxiety when he was about 6 months old until he turned one and the midwife actually encouraged me to go out once a week so he could get to used to being with other people. I'm a working mum and went back to work shortly after his 1st birthday so it was important for him to learn to be with others. He now goes to a nursery so even more vital that he could detatch.
Like I said, he is nearly 2 and is much better. He has a great relationship with me and with my Mum (who I live with since splitting with ex). I make an effort to at least have one night a week were I can go out with friends, maybe have a drink in a nice bar, go to a club or even just to the cinema/DVD night. If I'm lucky I may be to able to squeeze two nights a week.
One things I am adamant about is that my social never affects my time with my son. I rarely leave him when he is awake (unless absolutely essential!) and like to have bathed him, read to him and have him sleeping bed before I leave. I never stay out overnight and have only done this perhaps two/three times since he was born. I am always home at a reasonable hour and ready to get up with him in a morning. As long as being with my friends doesn't impact on his life I can see no problem in having time away from him. He is a happy, loving and cheerful little chap and has a wonderful bond with me. I am responsible in my time away from him. I don't stay out all night getting so drunk that I'm too hungover to care for him the next day. The only thing I am guilty of is getting a little tipsy and dancing like a loony! I am 23, I work for a living, I support my son and I love and care for him. My sister is in her 40's and because her husband left her, she too spends time two nights or so a week with friends. I think the stigma of 'partying' is attached to young mums because people are LOOKING for them to fail.

Christa - posted on 10/31/2010

I hear it too from some of my friends..but honestly i rarely go out..wish i could sometimes, but only once a month if it works out my daughters grandparents will take her for a full night..and then usually my hubby and i go out for dinner and then come home and enjoy the piece and quiet.
I use to get upset that my friends were going out an partying with out me..but after a while it got easier. Plus i wasn't tired or hung over in the morning and trying to take care of my daughter at the same time.
Now i enjoy going out with my friends for coffee instead of clubbing.

Paige - posted on 10/31/2010

I had my daughter when i just turned 18, so i sorta felt that i missed out on a bit, but ive only been out twice since having my daughter (now 9months) and i think i loved it more because ii was indefinete need for a break an could let my hair down, but was again soo eager to get home to my baby. I love going out but stayin at home with my daughter is way better than any night on the town

Michelle - posted on 10/31/2010

Im 19 and I fell pregnant to my daughter around my 18th. And that was the only time ive been able to drink. I dont get to go out and alot of my friends have shunned me since giving birth as i cant do what they can. My partner and I were able to go out a little bit when she was younger but now we barely go anywhere. Although when she is off breastmilk my family are willing to babysit so I can go out.

Jaymee - posted on 10/29/2010

ive only just recently gone out late night for i think the 4th time in 19months. im not 18 so i cant go out and drink and all but i go out with my mates but like i said ive only gone out around 4 times since she was born.

Sheri - posted on 10/29/2010

i wouldn't say the ones that are complaining are self-fish mom . for ex myself personally i a full stay home mother with a 3years old and a 9 months. i don't have a career or no education beyond high school. my life right now is based on my husband and my kid. i just think that it's really that the kid ties you down to a point where you can not go out to have fun, it's more of a matter that there are sometime where you just need a time for youself ,foucus on youself and prephaps a little treats(like goin out or something)

a full mother can be prety frustrating sometimes...

Sheri - posted on 10/29/2010

i don't realli go out either. i would go out once a week max. but we don't go party or clubbing at all, just hang out have a drink or a nice dinner ,gossiping and sometimes complaning about how our lifes

Dannii - posted on 10/29/2010

I havent been out since my girl was born. Mainly because my friends ditched when i got pregnant.

Amanda - posted on 10/29/2010

I could go out whenever I want, but I would rather spend that valuable time with my son, who is now 2 (October 24). Going out sometimes is fun and going out for events is also fun. I'm only 19 so I may be missing out on a lot, but right now my son is like the best company ♥.

Stacy - posted on 10/27/2010

my kids are 2year and 4weeks and i been out a few time after having kayden did a lady's night last week with my mum and then my mum had the kids over night once a week as am return work in 6weeks i think having a night 4 time a year is good as it normal takes 4sometime 5 months 2 get money together

India - posted on 10/27/2010

If I would want to I would get to go out alot but most of the time i just dont want to. I like to spend time with my friends because i dont get to spend alot of time with them. I go out with them every now and then but mmost of the time we do things to where i can take my daughter too.

Kayleigh - posted on 10/26/2010

i got pregnant for the first time when i was 17 (it unfortunately ended in mc) im 19 now with a 10 month old ive never been out clubbing and apart from family gatherings which has actually only been one wedding and a family reunion both of which i took my son to in the past 3 years ive not been to a party since my first pregnancy started either neither have i been to see a movie or had a holiday ive never been out without my son and hes only ever slept anywhere but home once for one night because i was majorly ill with food poisoning

but that's what mothers are supposed to do give up luxuries to provide for their child

Sara - posted on 10/26/2010

Yesenia,

This is a post that is close to my heart. I say that because I got married at age 16, became pregnant with my now year old son at 17 and celebrated my 18th birthday in an 8 X 12 bedroom at his parents house while my husband was out on a fishing trip.

Before I was pregnant, my husband and I had lots of fun working on our boat and going to cocktail parties at my in laws. Since I became pregnant, I have never ever been to a club in my whole life, I've only been to the movies once in the past two and a half years. And since my husband is still a commercial fisherman I am left alone for days at a time by myself with little to no family to help me. Actually, come to think of it, the only time I am away from my son is four hours twice a week to attend college. I do not go out, nor do I have the time. I juggle college, my son and our 2,000 square foot house all by myself without help. And then I see these shows like teen mom and it makes me very sad how those girls get upset when they can't go out, or say how much they don't get help, which obviously isn't the case. They do not know what being truly independent is. I'm sorry, but a REAL mother does not go out and party all the time. You can't just pop out a child and then go back to your normal teenage life. I dream every day of the day I actually have a day or night of freedom, something I have not experienced since many years ago. you and I are definitely in the same boat, so please do not feel alone. I am never envious of young mothers who brag about going out, because I would rather be near my sweet child than go out to party. Statistically speaking, young, teen moms have whole networks of support to help them, and therefore they feel as if they have more "me time". When in reality, most of the me time they get they do not deserve. Passing a child from family member to member just to go out several times a week or month is not being a parent. Raising your child should always be number one priority. I know I will probably offend some of the moms that go out often, but you know what, I am a real mother, and in the time I have been deprived of my free youth, I have taught my son so many things already that people are amazed at what he can do. Instead of going out and partying, my son knows how to wave by, say hello, good bye, how are you and I love you. Hearing those words from him every day is much more rewarding than any party, movie or club I could go to. So, I will leave you with this thought: Do not be envious or resentful of young mothers who may perhaps get it easy and rely on others to take care of their children. For you will have a stronger bond with your baby being with them all the time, rather than comming and going like unfortunately so many young mothers do. Yes, I do get sad sometimes about my lonliness and solitude, but I know in my heart, this life I created is more important than my own. It is a mother's responsibilty to put her children first, even if it means sacrificing "me time"



And remember: A REAL mother will eat cold food so her children can have a hot meal. She will buy clothing for her babies before herself. REAL mothers sacrifice their social life to make one with their child. And lastly, a mother will give all her love and expect nothing in return.

I hope this gives you much inspiration and assures you that, like so many other women have posted, you are certianly not alone. The young ladies that are lucky enough to go out frequently just happen to have a large network of support, and that is fine for them. I'd rather see my son's smiling face than a bunch of drunk people or something like that. =)

Brooke - posted on 10/26/2010

my daughter is 21 months, I have been out 4 times with friends. That wasn't until she was 1. My fiance and I have been out to the movies a lot... at one point we were going about once a week. But we are lucky to have his parents who adore our princess... We cant wait until our baby girl can sit through a movie with us.

Candyce - posted on 10/26/2010

My son's now four, but when he was an infant, I didn't really go out too much. I was working way too much, had just moved, and was simply too tired and stressed to hang out. Even after I got married, we still don't go out too much, even now. I think that's a typical mom thing though, no matter how old you are.

Kaileigh - posted on 10/25/2010

Blog for young moms

http://lifeofayoungmom.weebly.com

Check it out!

Amanda - posted on 10/24/2010

I have no desire to go out and "party" I am 19 married and have 2 kids. I never did party. maybe going out to dinner and stuff. I don't like it when people think that they should go out. I hear girls saying all the time " just because i had a baby doesn't mean I have to give up everything" and I say YES IT DOES. everything I do is for my kids and I feel bad when I leave them. I went to the STORE with my mom and felt very akward without my baby. for me going "out" is going to the store the mall. and I'm going to the pumkin patch on monday. I love doing stuff with my kids.I hate doing stuff without them..

Amielle - posted on 10/22/2010

I am a 18 year old mum with a 12 week old son and i never go out without him, which means i don't go out drinking or partying or anything "fun". Of course i have fun everyday with my beautiful boy, but going out is a thing of the past. I don't believe in asking my mum to look after him as she didn't choose to have him and is not her responsibility. I also couldn't be away from him for more then ten minutes anyway. I don't know how any mum can leave their son/daughter with a family member or friend and not feel guilty for going out, it was your choice to have the baby so you can say goodbye to the life that you used to have. I LOVE my son and do not regret having him for one second. :D

Emma - posted on 10/22/2010

i dont really get how people can just leave their kids to go out and have fun constantly, its your own responsiblity too look after your own kids, not just dump them onto others, my son will be 2 in november and ive only been out 4 times since ive had him and even then i was only over the road from him. i cant leave him for more than an hour at a time as i start to worry, even though he is in safe hand with my mom who had 7 kids so knows what shes doing. i feel like im a bad parent if i just want to go out, what if he got hurt or falls ill, i would want to be there

Stephanie - posted on 10/22/2010

I hardly ever get to go out anymore.. I think I've really went out and enjoyed myself maybe a handful of times since I've had my daughter and she's almost 3 now..

Hayley - posted on 10/22/2010

im 20 and lucky our family are always busting to babysit so we probably go out once a fortnight depending on whats going on we are lucky that close friends of ours have kids to so we often have bbqs together and such wich is good fun

Anastasia - posted on 10/22/2010

My boys 7months, we have been out once for a afternoon and for 2 nights :D

Maureen - posted on 10/22/2010

i dont get to go out either ive been out once since having my baby nd i didnt like it very much cause i was to tired anyway

Annabeth - posted on 10/22/2010

My son is 7 weeks old tomorrow and ever since i left my ex 7 months ago i have not been out with my friends. Yeah occasionally my mum or my aunty will take him while i go to the shops but that is it. I love being around my son every day but every now and then i just want some me time. When that happens my mum will take him to my aunty's place or for a walk. I think when he gets a bit older i might go out with my friends or cousins to go to a movie, party or shopping but atm i am just content to wach my son grow up.

Mindy - posted on 10/21/2010

i have been out since i got preg, my daughter is 8 months now.

Lyda - posted on 10/21/2010

I go to parties once in a while. my mom calls me to go drop of the baby because she says were still young and need to go out. but everytime its with my hubby. we got to parties and everywhere together. i dont go to look for guys or get wasted or anything like that. just hang out

Mandi - posted on 10/21/2010

Your not alone! I'm 21, and I was a party animal before, living the life of the 20 year old! But I dont go out much anymore. Sometime I get the urge to go out, and I do. But maybe once every 3 - 4 months and I dont PARTY, I go to a pub, or my last event was a wedding LOL. It doesnt matter if your young or not, every mom/dad needs adult time. Make sure you make that time. Its hard being young and having young friends, they dont understand that you cant just get ready and leave, it takes planning with a baby!!

Marty - posted on 10/21/2010

I've turned into a hermit crab, and I don't really mind. Me and the father are seperated so every second weekend I get to myself, but it seems that everytime I do, nobody wants to do anything. On days that I do have her, every time I think of going out, even for a walk, or to visit a friend, I talk myself out of it by thinking of the mental checklist I have to go through before I step out that door... it also doesn't help that my town is smack dab on a hill, so you can either go straight, or go downhill and have to go back up later or vice versa.

Emily - posted on 10/21/2010

I'm 21 and I had my son when I was 17.My mom helped me out a lot when I had him so I was able to go out atleast twice a week.When I had my daughter 8 months ago it was completly different.I'm married now and NEVER get to go out anymore.It's a lot for my husband and I to even go out to dinner alone anymore.Some moms have help and get to go out more and some of us don't.It just depends on the situation.

Samantha - posted on 10/21/2010

O honey I feel the same way b/c I never get to go out!! I would love to but my schedule w/ kids doesn't really allow it. So if they do they are lucky!!!!

Sarah - posted on 10/20/2010

i go out a lot at night, and usually its when my son (almost 1) is in bed for the night but other than that im 19, a single mother working two jobs to support my son. yes it is hard hearing all your friends brag about going here or there but this is when you turn around and brag well my child did this today and i dont see you dealing with the same thing i do and most of the time they will shut their mouths

Stephanie - posted on 10/20/2010

I haven't gone out since I was pregnant with my first (feb. 2008)...

Sara - posted on 10/20/2010

My daughter is 4 months old and i've gone out to a baronce since she's been born and it was only like a week ago. i went out for my 19th birthday because i was pregnant during my birthday. but thats the only time i've gone out. if i go anywheres she goes with me. a couple of times my mom has taken her for a couple hours because she only lives right up the road just so i can get some cleaning done or just have an hour or so by myself but i definalty do not go out all the time and i get looks from people already for being so young so it feels like you have to work extra hard just so you dont look like a bad mother. which by the way i feel like most teen mothers feel the same way that age doesnt matter, someone could be a 30 year old mother and going out every night and not being a good mom and the young mom could be doing better. i really dont think age matters as long as you are responsable and your child always comes first :)

Amanda - posted on 10/20/2010

hey, I'm 20 years old and a single mom to two small children. my sons 2.5 years old and autistic and my daughter is 13 months old. I go out about once every week or two. My mom watches the kids for the evening form about 6-10 (they go to bed at 7 so really its just watching them for an hour and then being there incase of emergency). that is plenty for me. I get stressed out and i do need that night out (i just go watch a movie or do some shopping or something) but i do not get how some girls can go out every night! I couldn't live with myself if i did that. I would feel so unbeleivably guilty. Being a mom means having responsibilities. its girls like that who give the responsible moms a bad name... honestly sometimes i feel bad going out once a week!

Ciara - posted on 10/20/2010

i know excatly how u feel i have ben in the exact same position as you from i had son 3 and half year ago..now im not sayin i dont go out but it definatly isnt every night or even every weekend...for the simple reason i dont have the money and i find it very hard to find a childminder i trust...plus i cant see how any parent that is out partying evry night can be caring for there child properly during the day....but to comletly disagree with a point made above im still only 21 so im not going to act like a middle aged woman when i go out when i can afford it i still go to night clubs and still drink alcohol and occasionally attend house parties once i have provided everything my child needs and am sure taht he is with a reliable childminder i see no problem in letting my hair down and acting like any other 21 year and that most definatly does not make me "some slutty whores that got knocked up and dont care."
i hope this helps

Alisha - posted on 10/19/2010

I have absolutely no desire to 'go out'. There's just no fulfillment in that lifestyle for me and there never was even when I did go out and party. I felt lonely and like hanging out with partiers, you just don't get any real relationships with people who care about who you are because everyone's drunk and has huge problems of their own. I think my daughter in some ways gave me an excuse to get out of a lifestyle that 'everyone's doing' when I really didn't want to do that anyways. I still went out for a little when she was 2 or 3, but now I just want to be with her. I still hang out with friends, but they have to accept that she's going to be coming along and most of them have children as well. I am in a mom's group twice a month and so that helps. I also enjoy my church family and Bible studies so I really have no need for going to parties or clubs and I don't want to set that kind of an example for my daughter. Also, that's not really the place I want to meet a guy because I have to think about the person I'm dating is also going to be an influence on my daughter if it ever got serious, so I have to stay away from guys that don't want to grow up and just want to party. I know moms who do go out quite a bit, and think it's fine, but sooner or later their children are going to realize what they are doing and think it's ok. I'm not saying a mom shouldnt' have fun, but really, to me, that's very far from being fun. (Just my opinion). If people want to go out that have children that is fine, but I just don't care for it.

Jamie - posted on 10/18/2010

I have a 28 month old daughter and I atleast go out 2-3 times a week..either to the movies,a club, friends house,dinner..but I also love to do things with my daughter! her grandparents absolutely love to see her when I do go out.

Chandra - posted on 10/18/2010

My son was born 3.5months early. Hell be 2 Nov. 29th but has only been home since Feb. 18th, 2009 so has been home for about 20months and has only been to a sitter over night once and for a couple of hours one other time and has been with my mom overnite maybe about 20 times since being home. Im different than a lot of my friends. I hate being away from my son even if hes with my mom. When I do go out I leave my moms about 9pm or so and get to my moms in the morning right away. Im one of the only moms in my group that doesnt go out all the time. I go out maybe once a month. My son goes to daycare during the day but when hes not in daycare He always comes to lunch or dinner with me. Its not very often that Im not with him. I mostly go out to a friends house and we play games and drink. If we go to my friends house together I do not drink and we leave so he gets to bed at 9pm. When I go out to the bar I only have 2 or 3 drinks and no more than that. I have only gotten drunk once since having my son. I dont get out very often at all but I dont mind. I miss my lil man way too much so its just easier staying home with him. lol

Brandee - posted on 10/18/2010

Im sorry but i dont support teenage mothers going out to crazy parties or drinking clubs at all. I mean calm adult parties are totally acceptable. But we as teenage mothers have to work EXTRA hard to show our image as good mothers not some slutty whores that got knocked up and dont care.

But if the parties are well mannered or clubs that dont have any alcohol and your not going to "party and find guys" or whatnot, then i really feel like who cares how often as long as your baby gets your attention most of the time and family is there to watch the child



I dont go to parties. When i go out, its to go shopping for aurora or to go to college. I did buy a disneyland pass but thats mainly so i can start taking aurora to socialize more. The last time i went out to go to ANY sort of party was Auroras bday party and before that was when I had my 19th bday party 2 weeks after aurora was born.