sister or an unborn baby,17 year old expected mum lost.

Kelsea - posted on 05/05/2010

I think you've made a great decision. Much of my family disagrees with me having a child, and I am 19 and graduated. So I could only imagine if I were younger. But, if your sister is older, maybe she is jelous or just thinks she knows what's best for you. But in the end, this is your body and your child. So deep down, you know the best. My own father wont speak to me and my grandma gives me lectures every chance she gets. I just hope that in the end, they come around. And I hope the same for your sister. If she really is against it for what she thinks is your own good, she'll realize what you really need is support and someone to openly talk to. So stand by your decision strongly. It may take untill she meets your child for her to realize what a blessing it is, or it may take even longer. But eventually it will happen. If not, then maybe she doesn't deserve to meet him/her. I hope the best for you.

Carmen - posted on 05/05/2010

In the end you will choose your child, but at the same time your sister will come around. I was 15 when I got pregnant. No one in my family was happy that I made my choice. Once my son was born, everyone came around. It will all work out in the end.

Desiree - posted on 05/05/2010

I think you should do what you feel is right... Cause if you choose to keep the baby she'll have to be around ans babies make anyone fall in love with them... soon or later she'll get over it.. everything happens for a reason this a just an obstacle for you to overcome... just do what you feel is right but make sure it isn't going to be something you regret in the future...

Paula - posted on 05/04/2010

im 16 and i have a bairn, shes 1yr and 5 month x
im so glad i had her, you old enough to make your own decitions, and if you even have that littist feeling you wanna keep tgis babe then youl regret it for the rest of your life if you have a abortion, youl always feel guilty it is a pretty big decition, but just talkin outa experiance of freinds, all the people i know who'v had 1 either suffer depretion now or they are always so down cus it was the biggest regret in there life, look what im sayn is, if you wanna keep[ YOUR BABY who you are going to be a MOTHER of, then go for it, live your life for you, noone else xxx

Samantha - posted on 05/04/2010

I was 16 when I got pregnant. I chose my baby rather than doing adoption or abortion like my mom had suggested. It is hard once the baby is born but one your little one gets here you will feel so needed and so important. If you have the support of your parents and/or the baby's father everything will be a bit easier. I had my step-dad upset with me for my whole pregnancy and he didn't talk to me or let me come back home to visit until the 17th of last month. And I had my son in December last year. I was 17 when I had him. School is hard when you have a baby but I am sure you will find a way to make it work out fo you. I agree with what everyone is saying. Even now baby comes first. Just keep doing what your doing and don't get too stressed out. Find things to help keep you calm and just stick to your choice. Don't let anyone make you think that just b/c you are a young mother that you won't be a good mother. And when people critisize you, listen to what they are saying and think about it before you act. Don't let anyone, and I mean ANYONE, make you think that you are a bad mother after your little one is born.

Megan - posted on 05/04/2010

I have two kids, my daughter three days after i turned 19, and my son at 20. My sister is now 25, and still jealous of the attention my kids get from our dad and family. She is constantly doing things to stir up trouble, still, after three years.
I wish i could tell you it'll get easier, or she'll grow out of it, but i can't. at the very least, if she doesn't stop, keep her out of your thoughts. You and the baby come first, not what she thinks or wants. that's it, the end. If she thinks any differently, tough shit, because it's not her body, not her baby, and bottom line- not her decision!
Stay strong, she can't ruin you or your child's life, no matter how hard she tries. Remember that, because she can't if you don't let her.

Angelica - posted on 05/04/2010

I was 17 when i got pregnant and of course people are going to get upset its only natural. But to have your sister choosing over her or your child is a different story Just tell her that your keeping it. And sooner or later she will end up being okay with it after a while. Sisters are there for everything.. maybe she just has to get used to the idea of you being a mom [:

Asami - posted on 05/04/2010

After reading all the comments i was really happy and im really thankfull. my sister still ignores me and mum which is still a pain in the butt but i just smile at her and dont talk.
i just want to say ALL of you are so brave and so positive that i just want to be mothers just like all of you. I am going to keep the baby and i will love him/her (i will know in 2 weeks!) i would keep looking forward to the future :) thank you so much for the advice it really helped me keep going with my life!

Lyndsay - posted on 05/04/2010

Choose the baby. I personally think that if anyone gives you an ultimatum, they aren't worth the choice.

Kayla - posted on 05/04/2010

i was 17 when i had my son and yes it is had but its worth it this lil boy is the best thing that has ever happened to me. im 18 now and my son is almost 7 months old. my sister wasnt happy about me having a baby either but once he was born her attitude compeletly changed

Helen - posted on 05/03/2010

maybe you should write a letter back to her. telling her your dcision how she made you feel with her letter. ppl on here have very good points. your relationship with your sister is changed no matter matter what you choose. maybe when she sees the baby she will get over and if she doesnt then you have a beatiful baby that you didnt give up on so you're already a great mommie. im very happy you chose to keep your baby. dont give in. you are very strong willed :)

Jayne - posted on 05/03/2010

I think your sister is being childish and i tink altoug your the younger 1 you have to be the mature 1 if she wont speak to you you should maybe write her a letter with your ulimatum and pretty much explain how you feel about your baby and that its her choice whether she's apart of it or not explain that you love her but your baby always comes 1st! being pregnant is very emotional at the best of times so if your prone to depression you really should speak to your doctor now before it would start. is your babies dad supportive?

Kelly - posted on 05/03/2010

my sister was the same way;
she then was living in a different town while i was pregnant;
so we really didnt talk at all;
we would txt everyonce in awhile;
she thought i was too young(i was 18 when i got pregngant, had her at 19)&&havent lived my life(partying&&having fun);
i never really did party or anything so it wasnt a big difference
but as it came closer to me giving birth she came around;
she even put her job on the line when i went into labor bc she wanted to be there when she was born;
she is now living with my fiance,daughter&&myself;
&&i cant get her to stop adoring her niece

good luck to you;
hope she comes around quick!!

Brittany - posted on 05/02/2010

My sister did the same thing at first! :/ its stressful but eventually she will get over it! Jus let her throw her fit or tantrum watever you wanna call it and give her time to accept it! I was also 17 and pregnant its hard but well worth it! :)

Alyssa - posted on 05/02/2010

I would choose my baby. The baby is apart of you and if she cant accept that then her loss.

Kyla - posted on 05/02/2010

First off, if your sister really cared about your feelings then she wouldn't have you choose between something that is apart of you and her. This baby is also apart of her... Don't worry girl, you are young but my boyfren too is only 17, but he is a wonderful dad. This baby is your choice & ONLY YOUR choice. Once you see your baby, you will cry & love him/her to death. Don't worry about your sister, she will get over it. Don't worry what that letter said, throw it away. Don't let anything get you down, be happy, you're becoming a MOMMY! the most wonderful thing in the world! After you give birth and your sister holds her niece/nephew in her hands she will get over it. Just bc you're 17 doesnt mean you can't do it, you can! and as long as your mom supports you, thats all you need. never mind your sister. When you feel sad bc of her, just think how happy this baby will make you. "Sometimes you have to be selfish when it comes to your happiness"

Kat - posted on 05/01/2010

personally id choose baby if thats what it comes down too i kno in my case i was 18 and prego my daughter was born a month ago and now i couldnt picture my life without her being a young mom is hard but i think you could do it

Sophie - posted on 05/01/2010

choose what you think is right your sister could hold that baby and wonder why was i argueing i was 15 when i was pregs i continued with school when i had my son my dad looked after him so could do my gcse and my partner go college im now going to apply for college after takin twos years out near enough i want to do childcare its ur body its ur choice

Megan - posted on 05/01/2010

Your baby will need you, your sister has made it clear shes grown up enough to look after herself, your baby is the most important thing in your life at the moment, don't stress you'll only make it worse for yourself and your baby.

Karen - posted on 05/01/2010

she is probably jst shocked/disappointed jst ignore her she will come round in the end wether tht b while ur preggo or when baby is born dnt worry xxxx

Ashleigh - posted on 05/01/2010

I thikn that she will eventually get over it. Something you'll learn the farther you go in your pregnancy and especially after your baby is born, is that your child ALWAYS comes first and you will do what you have to do whether people like it or not. She needs to be more mature about the situation. Yes, I will tell you, it's very hard being pregnant so young. A LOT of peoples opinions of you will change. It's up to you to make them change for the good or for the bad. Show her that you are responsible and that you love your child, no matter what she thinks about it. And when the baby is born, she will likely be excited for you and want to hold him/her.

Meagan - posted on 05/01/2010

how can she be lyke towards you? that's family she should be supporting you for having to go thru this at a young age. i would just ignore it & hope that things change before you give birth. lyke everyone else has said its ur decision & no one can make you choose them over ur baby.

Jessica - posted on 05/01/2010

Im 17 and pregnant aswell. My sister was similar, saying really horrible things to me and not accepting the situation but shes used to the idea now. It just took her a while, I think it could have been jealousy because I was now getting my parents attention instead of her i guess lol.

Laura - posted on 04/30/2010

and all the baby will do whilst your upset is kicking the life out of you to cheer up basically saying "oi im here" sort of thing like i say talk to the midwife about dont think shes not listening they all do to help you out xx

Laura - posted on 04/30/2010

i agree with all you and yeah when i seen my scan of all 3 of my girls i cried cuz the love i felt then was amazing when i had my first kicks i felt real im carryin a life ive got to protect it but the second scan the best my all of my girls decided to swear at the woman who was scanning me and kicked the scanner lol but i hope all goes well and like the others are saying your sister will come round wait for her to come to you and ive had and still got depression had it best part of 7 years and finally getting councilling now as before they said i was really young....its not nice but if you talk to your doctor or midwife as soon as your feeling down they can help my midwife helped me and when i was in labor with trinity-angel i was laughing more than anything (until she was born then crying because she was georgous still is now same as her sisters) the midwife is like your best friend but you enjoy having this little life inside you its the best thing a woman can do carry a baby and give birth its the most amazing thing ever xxxx

Elizabeth - posted on 04/30/2010

& i totally agree with Camie it is YOUR decision & no one elses!

Elizabeth - posted on 04/30/2010

i got pregnant the month i turned 18 me and my sisters were really close ( one older and one younger) and they didn't talk to me for weeks because they were so disappointed in me. I think it's just something to expect from people that really love you, i hope things get better for you and she comes around. By the way my sisters LOVE my son they are very proud aunties now :)

Camie - posted on 04/30/2010

It is easy for you sister to disagree because she is not in your situation. It is your body and your life and family is supposed to support you no matter what you do. Do what makes you happy and if people around you won't love you and support you for it, then they dont deserve to be in your life.

Bernie - posted on 04/30/2010

thats very wrong. if your sister is going to be like that then i wouldnt resond back or anything. this baby is yours no matter what. if you get dont have or give up the baby youll have a regret the rest of your life and you probley wont be all that close to your sister because of what happen. i had my first (royce lee) when i was 15 and hes now 3 and second (zoie abigail) when i was 17. i hope you do what you what and not what everyone esle (your sister) wants from you.

Asami - posted on 04/30/2010

she is 23, i mean listening to your story giving birth to three children is amazing! Its so brave! hmm i could just ignore her back but i just tend to avoid her .im worried because ive had depression before so i dont want to be too upset because it might affect the baby but i cant stop thinking about it. at one stage i thought of giving up but after i saw my baby at 12 weeks on ultra sound i couldnt . do you rember the first time you had ultra sound and saw the baby?

Laura - posted on 04/30/2010

its wrong what your sister is doing no one should be doing that they should support your decision my uncle dis agreed with mine to keep my kids he dont talk to me but im just getting on with everything else yeah it will be hard but you and your unborn baby will pull through how old is she because shes acting like a child to be honest xxxx

Asami - posted on 04/30/2010

thank you for the reply. and i had to say that i love the name lily-rose! i try and cope with it but she lives with me and shes older than me plus she even said that my mum was not a proper mother for letting me go through this. its really hard, she can say hello to a cat dinner but she cant even look at my face.

Laura - posted on 04/30/2010

i think you are doing brilliantly has your sister got children if not maybe she is jealous....i am now 19 and i have 3 children the eldest i had at 16 (lilly-rose) i had pheonix at 17 and finally trinity-angel at 18....i had a lot of people disagreeing with me keeping my children and a load of people said i should get rid but i didnt n i dont regret that decision for one minute just keep going strong....i know this is going to be hard concentrate on your baby as that is all you need to do and congratulations by the way i hope ive helped but just ignore your sister hopefully she will realise she is being childish and say sorry for the nasty letter xxxx