The way people look to teen moms

Lia - posted on 08/30/2012 ( 7 moms have responded )

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When I first got pregnant I was 19 and going to college. People used to look at me but I have never felt bad about it. I never heard any whispering at my back. I actually felt good in school. When I had my baby, I used to do walks around campus with my babyboy. I was still in Miami.

Nowadays I'm 25 and living in Madrid, Spain. I have started to study a new carreer but people here get very surprise when they know I have a son. This is a very big issue for them. I'm now 35 weeks pregnant with my second baby and I will keep going to university as soon as I my baby turns 4 months old but I'm scared with my classmates. The way they look at me is very weird and I feel really uncorfortable.

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Jennifer - posted on 09/28/2012

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I was 19 when I got pregnant. I know how you feel. It's because there are a lot of young moms out there that have kids and don't take care of them. That's why there is a stereo type. It's sad. I was a wild teen but when I got pregnant, I changed my whole life. My son save my life. I'm not 29, married to the father, and we had another child who is now 4. No one thought I would make a good mother. But I proved everyone wrong! So, just try to ignore people. They are ignorant, that's all.



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Hope - posted on 09/21/2012

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I definitely understand where you're coming from. The trend now is to have babies in your mid 30s or later. I personally think it should be the opposite. The longer you wait, the more the complications you are prone to. I'm a young mom also, got pregnant at 20. The mom's at my son's school give me looks like I have leporacy or something, but honestly I think they're just JEALOUS! Why? Because I'm young and hot, and everything they're not! Don't let other people bring you down. You are a great person and a wonderful mom! I understand the uncomfortable feeling, but try as hard as you can to let it roll off your shoulder. All us young moms get it, it may be unfair but hey, when you examine the REAL reasons why the older moms do this- it seems pretty shallow and stuck up at best! You don't want to have friends like that, nobody does. The best you can do is be a good mom to your youngin and let those other moms look at you weird. Remember: the weird looks (in my opinion) mean they're jealous! They have to work twice as hard to lose the baby weight.....you don't because you're young! There is nothing wrong with thinking you're great. What is wrong is other mom's being disapproving of your life. Nobody asked them! Unsolicited judgement is NEVER welcome in my book and shouldn't be in yours! Be well.

Juanita - posted on 09/10/2012

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i understand why people give teen or young mom dirty looks, becuase there are teen mom /young moms out there who dont really take care of there children right. dont take any responsiablity for there actions and do not realise they have a baby that they need to take care of and change there life around for that baby. some cant do it. they basically ruin it for the young moms who give up everything so they can be the best mother they can be no matter how young thy are. i was 15 when ihad my firts child. then 16 with my second . then 17 with my last. my husband and i started our family young , but we took full responsiablty for the family we had . we did not care if we had to give up our so calle teenage years because that baby or babies were worth the sacrafice.

my husband always says just let them stare .they only know by what the immature mothers show them not by what u show them.

and hes right.

not only do some young mothers not take responsiablity but not only young mothers are bad mther. i have seen 30, 40, 50 any age be worse of a parent. age dnt make u a good parent. its ur self that does and what u will do to be a good parent.

do not mind what they say or do . you kno u are a good mother. im 20 with 3 kids. i turn most heads but i dont let that effect the mother i am.

Laura - posted on 09/08/2012

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It is frustrating to me as well in America.. I go to a university where I'm starting to feel a little like an alien for having a 4 month old! I'm 22, is it so crazy to have a baby at this age?! Or even as a teenager..

Morgan - posted on 09/06/2012

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It sounds like you moved to a country that has a different view on whatever they are categorizing you in. Are there not many other female Americans at this school? If there is are any of them pregnant? It might be interesting to them to simply see a pregnant foreigner. It's hard to say why they stare. It would most likely matter on their culture and beliefs about women but I can't be positive on that.

Tami - posted on 09/05/2012

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I'm 20 and pregnant with my second child. I hear things all the time from my family, my fiances family, strangers, etc. the key is to ignore them. no matter the age if your responsible enough to take care of another child and you are happy about your baby, there is no need to let other bring you down about it. I've cut a lot of contact with people just so i don't hear what they say. you have a precious gift to take care of! rejoice about it rather than worry about mere opinions of others!

Courtnee - posted on 09/04/2012

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Babies are the most beautiful blessing anyone can get, no matter what age they are conceived. Don't let them get to you!! They are probably jealous bc you are doing what they are doing with 1 baby and 1 on the way!! :))

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