What do you think about parents letting their 11 yr old have babies?

Esperanza - posted on 10/21/2009

the real question is what is an 11yr old doin having sex?

my sister is 11yrs old nd if she was talkin about gettin pregnant

WOW she better run real quick am 16 with a 4month old i know i know young.

but still come on now she's not even in her teens yet she still a baby/child.

my sister cant even take care of herself let alone another human being.

am not saying once she hits her teens its ok cuz no its not but idk thats just waaaaaay to young....



and i seen a comment on here that someone said the ages 11-18yrs old dont have healthy babies...well ur WRONG am 16 nd my baby is healthy and smart as hell so u really dont know what ur talking about

Marie - posted on 10/19/2009

I dont think the true subject should be should we "let" them, i think its where were the parents when the 11 yr old was out having sex

Kayla - posted on 10/19/2009

I think it's crazy and parents that let their 11 year old even have sex need to realize that they will be supporting and raising their grandchild.

Lindsey - posted on 10/17/2009

Quoting Hannah:

Hmmm...

First of all, before I give my opinion, let me give some facts that are being confused...

1.) The moment a person reaches puberty, their bodies are fully able to make babies. Now, the very second she starts producing little buds of breasts, maybe not, but when you're ready to bleed, you're ready to breed. This is how it's been since Cave Woman, or Eve if you prefer, and so far it doesn't look like there's going to be any change in that. You want more proof? Look at cats and dogs. They go into heat and start their version of a period. That's usually when breeders start breeding their animals.

Don't misunderstand me: We are not cats and dogs, our bodies don't work exactly the same. But the basic blue-prints are there, and almost exactly the same. About the only difference is that we, as humans, get our periods/breeding capabilities once a month... Dogs get them, depending on the breed and size, once a year to once every few months.

Now let me give an example of an exception to the "old enough to bleed, old enough to breed" rule. I don't know if any one remembers or saw, but a few years ago there was a 5 year old girl who started her period. Genuinely; they tested her for abuse, watched her for a little while, and she genuinely had started puberty at the tender, small age of 5. I will be the first to say that she isn't capable of having babies, as she's not too much bigger than one, herself. I can go into all the details we already know, about our uterus being 40" at term and such, and it would push my point along, but I think that most of you agree with my point anyway, and it doesn't need to be mentioned any further.

2.) Most AMERICAN 11 year olds aren't mentally mature enough to handle a baby. Americans nowdays are raised to be children until they're in their 20's (LEGALLY, we're adults at 18.) They're raised to be immature as long as possible, because most parents don't want to let go of their little girls (or boys). However, I go back to Cave Woman, who was learning to cook and clean and gather/hunt from the age that they're actually able. They don't have the big responsibility of keeping the family or tribe fed, but they still learn from when they're, what we consider, babies. Once they get older, they DO get those responsibilities of helping Mom (or Dad) and they ARE in charge of those things. And WHY? Because eventually, their child was going to be ready to be given away, and she needed to be ready to be a mom, herself. Most of the "unindustrialized" culters and ways of life around the world are still the same way. DOES THIS MAKE IT WRONG? No. That would be like someone telling us that waiting until marriage to have babies is wrong. It's a matter of opinion, but someone's way of life isn't wrong, and shame on any of you who say otherwise (you know who I'm talking about).

3.)Abortion is not birth control and isn't meant to be used as such. Not only that, but forcing an 11 year old girl to get an abortion when she's become preggo will do so, SO much more damage to her than it would if she had and took care of the baby. Here's why:
a- Assuming she wants the child, she will consider someone taking it away from her as murder. And guess what? You're the one who made the decision for her to get rid of it. So you murdered her baby. That's something she will NEVER forgive you for. Ever.
b- By you making all her decisions for her, especially going in, as some have said, "no questions asked," (meaning no debate or consideration for it) you will make it so that she will never be able to make her own adult decisions. How do I know? My parents did it to me all my life. I have a hard time making simple decisions because I was never old enough to make them on my own. It sucks, and I struggle a lot with those consequences. Your child needs to learn from their own mistakes, as well as others.
c- The last one led to this one: She needs to learn from her mistakes. That means that sex makes babies, and babies are a lot of money, and a lot of work. Forcing an abortion just teaches her, "Oops, I got pregnant, but I'm not ready/don't want a baby. Oh well, they're disposable." Seriously, that's sick.

After that, they start branching into similar ways to screw over her psyche.

4.) For the lady who says that a 17 y/o can't have healthy babies... My baby was one of the healthiest my doctors had ever seen. I was pregnant at 16, turned 17 soon after. She was about a week late (obviously not premie). On top of that, the risk of having kids INCREASES WITH AGE. That includes damage to the mother, the baby, Downs Syndrom, and all that other stuff that happens in nature.

Now my opinion:
Personally, I think 11 y/o's, in today's society, having sex is disgusting. Because most of the girls in today's society aren't ready for sex alone, let alone a baby. Now, I believe in exceptions to EVERY rule, and if an 11 year old is truly mature and ready for a baby, and she's found someone she truly loves with all her heart, then ok, there's nothing wrong with that. It's love, and I think babies should come from love. It's not something I want to think about, even if they ARE ready, but if she's able to make that decision, who am I to judge?

Im sorry but at the age of 11 you clearly dont know what love is. Kids are learning things from shows that werent even shown when i was a kid until after 10pm because of the material that was in those shows. SUCH AS SEX, FALLING IN LOVE AT A YOUNG AGE...SO on and so fourth...nowadays everyshow on tv except those for toddlers is now talking about being in"LOVE" and making out and going farther than "FIRST BASE" what the hell is wrong with society honestly? I will NOT let my daughter watch these dumb ass shows that are teaching her to grow up faster than she should be. When i was 11 years old i was running around and getting dirty. I definitly was not haveing sex and "FALLING IN LOVE" no 11 year old even knows the concept of love. They may THINK that their in LOVE but are you really going to let the child that you gave birth to have a child at that young of an age. NOPE she better keep her damn legs closed. Better yet she shouldnt been even thinking about having sex at that age anyways.

Lindsey - posted on 10/17/2009

Quoting Marley:

Quoting Ava:

I don't believe that at 11 years old, it should be your child's decision whether or not to keep the baby. As a parent, until they're at least sixteen, I believe parents should make those decisions because children that young generally do not fully comprehend the rest of their lives or the hardships they might go through. They have -no- idea what it's like to not be tended to themselves, and to have to turn around and tend to another human being. If my child gets pregnant at 11, she will get an abortion. Period. I will allow her to have her own 'decision' if she is 16 or over, maybe. After 18, it is all on her. But I will not sit back and allow my child to possibly ruin their lives in an attempt to give them independence. You think that people should have children as young as 10? Here's the problem with that logic. Biologically, we can. Mentally, we can't. Humans are confusing creatures because we have cognitively evolved far beyond anything else. But physically, we're very lacking. Your body may be -ready- to have children at 10, but the mind does not tell a woman to have a child until after 18 generally because she has finished mentally developing (up until then, -she is a child-, because she is not fully developed). Most young teen pregnancies like that are NOT out of urge to have children, but out of incompetence and carelessness. I've also seen little black whores on Maury screaming, 'I wanted my four kids!', and she's 15. That alone should tell you that trusting an 11 year old's intuition about children is a no-go. Honestly, screw that. Again, my child -WILL- get an abortion if she is pregnant under the age of 16. It's a 50/50 shot between 16 and 17, and at 18 it's not my problem at all.

If your child ends up getting pregnant, it is not your choice whether or not to MURDER her child. And "little black whores" is a horrible stereotypical statement. You are just proving to everyone how much of a hypocrite you are. I bet an 11 year old is mature enough NOT to say something along the lines of "little black whores". Maybe you should think a bit more before spilling your opinions for us to read. Thanks.

Please tell me how "little black whores" is a horrible stereotypical statement? She CLEARLY stated that she saw this on Maury (A TV SHOW SIMILAR TO OPRAH) and the LITTLE girls were screaming "I WANTED MY FOUR KIDS!" Keep in mind that THis girl was only 15 YEARS OLD and she already has FOUR damn kids. THAT MEANS THAT SHE HAS NOT HAD PROPER PARENTING AND SHE IS GOING AROUND SLEEPING WITH A PERSON OR PEOPLE AND GETTING PREGNANT. IM SORRY BUT IF YOUR 15 YEARS OLD AND HAVE 4 KIDS YOUR A WHORE. Its not her fault that this is whats being shown on tv. IVE SEEN SHOWS WERE THERE ARE 12 AND 13 YEAR OLD GIRLS WHITE WHO HAVE MULTIPUL KIDS AND YES THERE WHORES TOO. ITS NOT A STEREOTYPICAL STATEMENT WHEN ITS THE TRUTH. SORRY TO SAY.

Kerry - posted on 10/16/2009

Its interesting in reading the responses that no one has mentioned how dangerous it can be to give birth to a baby before you are done fully growing. Yes many girls have given birth at 15 and above but it is still very dangerous. Below 15 is extremely dangerous for the mother. Girls are starting their periods younger because of better health care and nutrition not because they are ready to breed at that age.

Many of those middle eastern and African girls that are forced to get married before the age of 16 die from pregnancy and child birth. Even girls in this country die or can no longer have other children because of complications from a young birth. That 12 yr old friend was very lucky that her child was born healthy but if her hips were developed enough to give birth then she probably had an easier time but many girls are still very tiny at the preteen age and therefore wouldn't be as lucky.

There was just a case in argentina or brazil where a 9 yr old got pregnant from incest by her father and doctors and child experts said that carrying the babies, she was pregnant with twins, would more than likely kill her and they petitioned the government for an abortion on medical grounds and was granted it but they were excommunicated because the country was catholic.

Carrying a baby is just not about a little one growing inside the mother. It strains your heart, liver, kidneys and causes various other issues with blood pressure and muscle strains. All these can even cause problems with women but when you are still young and growing yourself the issues are compounded.

At the mention of abortion many got upset but if you look at things realistically and not with emotion one can see why a mother would decide that for her child who is now pregnant at too young an age. The life of my child would be more important than to put her through the complications that can develop from carrying a child at such a young age. Many young pregnancies end in C-sections because the birth canal on them is too narrow or their hips aren't developed enough to naturally deliver a baby. That is a major surgery that takes most women weeks to recover from. When you think about it from a medical and health standpoint you can see why abortion would be a logical point and conclusion to come to.

Yes, 11 yr olds shouldn't be having sex but unfortunately in some neighborhoods boys and girls grow up very quickly. I doubt an 11 yr old even fully comprehends sex or anything of that nature just that it might feel good or someone has power over her and she is doing it to save face or to gain something or retain a "boyfriend" who says he loves her.

Malaysia - posted on 10/15/2009

ok now thats jus a hott mess @ 11 i wasnt even thinkin about sex i would laugh wenever someone said the word i was so inmature @ the time and a baby i wouldnt hav the slightest idea wat 2 do wit it that is absoultely too young i didnt even get my period til i was 12yrs old. i have a 10 yr old lil sister and i would b damned if she was to start havin sex next year i would catch a case quick believe dat!!!

Hannah - posted on 10/13/2009

Hmmm...

First of all, before I give my opinion, let me give some facts that are being confused...

1.) The moment a person reaches puberty, their bodies are fully able to make babies. Now, the very second she starts producing little buds of breasts, maybe not, but when you're ready to bleed, you're ready to breed. This is how it's been since Cave Woman, or Eve if you prefer, and so far it doesn't look like there's going to be any change in that. You want more proof? Look at cats and dogs. They go into heat and start their version of a period. That's usually when breeders start breeding their animals.

Don't misunderstand me: We are not cats and dogs, our bodies don't work exactly the same. But the basic blue-prints are there, and almost exactly the same. About the only difference is that we, as humans, get our periods/breeding capabilities once a month... Dogs get them, depending on the breed and size, once a year to once every few months.

Now let me give an example of an exception to the "old enough to bleed, old enough to breed" rule. I don't know if any one remembers or saw, but a few years ago there was a 5 year old girl who started her period. Genuinely; they tested her for abuse, watched her for a little while, and she genuinely had started puberty at the tender, small age of 5. I will be the first to say that she isn't capable of having babies, as she's not too much bigger than one, herself. I can go into all the details we already know, about our uterus being 40" at term and such, and it would push my point along, but I think that most of you agree with my point anyway, and it doesn't need to be mentioned any further.

2.) Most AMERICAN 11 year olds aren't mentally mature enough to handle a baby. Americans nowdays are raised to be children until they're in their 20's (LEGALLY, we're adults at 18.) They're raised to be immature as long as possible, because most parents don't want to let go of their little girls (or boys). However, I go back to Cave Woman, who was learning to cook and clean and gather/hunt from the age that they're actually able. They don't have the big responsibility of keeping the family or tribe fed, but they still learn from when they're, what we consider, babies. Once they get older, they DO get those responsibilities of helping Mom (or Dad) and they ARE in charge of those things. And WHY? Because eventually, their child was going to be ready to be given away, and she needed to be ready to be a mom, herself. Most of the "unindustrialized" culters and ways of life around the world are still the same way. DOES THIS MAKE IT WRONG? No. That would be like someone telling us that waiting until marriage to have babies is wrong. It's a matter of opinion, but someone's way of life isn't wrong, and shame on any of you who say otherwise (you know who I'm talking about).

3.)Abortion is not birth control and isn't meant to be used as such. Not only that, but forcing an 11 year old girl to get an abortion when she's become preggo will do so, SO much more damage to her than it would if she had and took care of the baby. Here's why:
a- Assuming she wants the child, she will consider someone taking it away from her as murder. And guess what? You're the one who made the decision for her to get rid of it. So you murdered her baby. That's something she will NEVER forgive you for. Ever.
b- By you making all her decisions for her, especially going in, as some have said, "no questions asked," (meaning no debate or consideration for it) you will make it so that she will never be able to make her own adult decisions. How do I know? My parents did it to me all my life. I have a hard time making simple decisions because I was never old enough to make them on my own. It sucks, and I struggle a lot with those consequences. Your child needs to learn from their own mistakes, as well as others.
c- The last one led to this one: She needs to learn from her mistakes. That means that sex makes babies, and babies are a lot of money, and a lot of work. Forcing an abortion just teaches her, "Oops, I got pregnant, but I'm not ready/don't want a baby. Oh well, they're disposable." Seriously, that's sick.

After that, they start branching into similar ways to screw over her psyche.

4.) For the lady who says that a 17 y/o can't have healthy babies... My baby was one of the healthiest my doctors had ever seen. I was pregnant at 16, turned 17 soon after. She was about a week late (obviously not premie). On top of that, the risk of having kids INCREASES WITH AGE. That includes damage to the mother, the baby, Downs Syndrom, and all that other stuff that happens in nature.

Now my opinion:
Personally, I think 11 y/o's, in today's society, having sex is disgusting. Because most of the girls in today's society aren't ready for sex alone, let alone a baby. Now, I believe in exceptions to EVERY rule, and if an 11 year old is truly mature and ready for a baby, and she's found someone she truly loves with all her heart, then ok, there's nothing wrong with that. It's love, and I think babies should come from love. It's not something I want to think about, even if they ARE ready, but if she's able to make that decision, who am I to judge?

Amanda - posted on 10/13/2009

Quoting Rachel:

and technically a 11 year old body, isn't capable of even having a health baby, most likely would end up have a baby with health issue or a preemie. as well as any age through 11-18. and might i mention a 11 year old isn't even capable of make there own decisions yet.

a. an 11 year old boy is capible.. in fact some boys are able around the age of 9.. not likely.. but definetly possible...  boys reach puberty between the ages of 9 and 15 and there are always early bloomers. i knew an 11 year old who had a full beard when i was younger!

b. i was 17 and produce a healthy full term baby.  and the 13 year old i knew who got pregnant also had a perfectly healthy full term baby. infact out of the young moms i know between 13-18 none of them had unhealthy babies save one who wasn't taking care of herself.. and her child only had minor problems that resolved themselves.

Amanda - posted on 10/13/2009

i find it sad that 11 year olds now a days are thinking about sex.. im 19 and at 11 i blushed at the thought of being kissed on the cheek for gods sake! i "lost it" at 16 and i thought i was to young.. when i got pregnant at 17 i thought i would be putting up with so much ridcule.. but i was seen as an older teen mom! a girl i knew was 13 and was 2 months ahead of me! i dunno.. its scary. im scared of what its going to be like when my kids get older!

Jacinta - posted on 10/12/2009

Quoting Tiffany:

when I think back to myself at 11, i was still playing with barbies..

so was i... at 11 boys were icky....   i'm 19 and expecting my first in feb.  i remember finding out i was pregnant at 19...  it was the most exciting thing in the world, and still is but even at my age the reality of what was happening didnt really set in till i was about 16 weeks. how can you expect an 11 year old to understand and grasp what is happening?

Tamzin~Rose - posted on 10/11/2009

that would be a devistating lesson to learn having your baby taken.

Quoting marcella:

yea that is nasty but dont punish the baby inside of her just give the baby up... in my opion i feel that abortions are bad they kill a living being inside of u... so i disagree i rather give up a child than kill one and maybe doing that might teach that child something having to watch her baby leave in some one else arms...

Quoting Lyndsay:

That is disgusting to me. If I had a daughter who came home pregnant at the age of 11, I would haul her off to the nearest abortion clinic no questions asked. As for people in unindistrialized nations, I don't think they should be reproducing anyway (lets have 10 kids and watch all of them die of AIDS!).

 

Tamzin~Rose - posted on 10/11/2009

i think its wrong, not just on a personal level but medically it can be really dangerous or even fatal to the girl and baby. not to mention the fact that at eleven no one would have the mental stability to even look after a new born.

Christina - posted on 10/11/2009

Why are children at this age even sexually active? We need to educate them & our future generations. Kids need to take the time to be kids. Otherwise, they will be forced to grow up much more quickly, fall into poverty, lack education and income as well as have an innocent child subject to all the above. There is no need to rush. Take the time to be a kid...you only get to once! :D

Cynthia - posted on 10/11/2009

Quoting Ava:

I don't believe that at 11 years old, it should be your child's decision whether or not to keep the baby. As a parent, until they're at least sixteen, I believe parents should make those decisions because children that young generally do not fully comprehend the rest of their lives or the hardships they might go through. They have -no- idea what it's like to not be tended to themselves, and to have to turn around and tend to another human being. If my child gets pregnant at 11, she will get an abortion. Period. I will allow her to have her own 'decision' if she is 16 or over, maybe. After 18, it is all on her. But I will not sit back and allow my child to possibly ruin their lives in an attempt to give them independence. You think that people should have children as young as 10? Here's the problem with that logic. Biologically, we can. Mentally, we can't. Humans are confusing creatures because we have cognitively evolved far beyond anything else. But physically, we're very lacking. Your body may be -ready- to have children at 10, but the mind does not tell a woman to have a child until after 18 generally because she has finished mentally developing (up until then, -she is a child-, because she is not fully developed). Most young teen pregnancies like that are NOT out of urge to have children, but out of incompetence and carelessness. I've also seen little black whores on Maury screaming, 'I wanted my four kids!', and she's 15. That alone should tell you that trusting an 11 year old's intuition about children is a no-go. Honestly, screw that. Again, my child -WILL- get an abortion if she is pregnant under the age of 16. It's a 50/50 shot between 16 and 17, and at 18 it's not my problem at all.she has no idea

she has no idea what shes talking about. im 16 i got pregnant a lil while before i turned 15, so what, my baby was born 8lbs 15oz had no problems at all. there was never any question about abortion or giving her up thats just wrong. i dont think age matters, sure 11 is super young but still, theres no reason to go bashing others.

Gean - posted on 10/07/2009

I feel sorry for the child that they will not get to expeience growing up as a child and also I feel sorry for the parents that they will now have another child to raise. The reason that I say that is yes it is wrong for an 11 years old to have a baby but at the same time it was not the parent making that child go out and have sex that was the childs choice. At the same time it is also that parents responibility to make sure that they talk and teach their child the right decisions. I know that there are a lot of us a parents out there that have to work full time and cannot afford child care or choose not to use child care because our children are good kids and we think this could not happen to me but reality is it does. Then who is there to pick up the pieces the parents. I also have an 11 and 13 year old I worry about this daily. My 13 year old is at home after school and I am at work for a couple more hours. It scares me to death to think that he might be out there having sex. But at the same time we have a very open realtionship and we talk daily about sex drug and anything else that is concern to him. Thank goodness right now he is very much into school and girls are not a concern right now. But I alo know that this will change a lot with in the next year to 4 years. All I can say is I wish anyone who is in the spot the best of luck and hopefully it will open other peoples eyes to the realitiy that our children are growing up faster than we want them to .

Alyse - posted on 10/07/2009

completly wrong i would be so frightened if my 11yr old was having sex let alone been responsiable for an innocent lil life

Krista - posted on 10/06/2009

This is a non-issue really. It's so like people to focus on a symptom and ignore the problem. I call our time the the age of Band-Aids. I'd rather bleed.

Marcella - posted on 10/06/2009

yea that is nasty but dont punish the baby inside of her just give the baby up... in my opion i feel that abortions are bad they kill a living being inside of u... so i disagree i rather give up a child than kill one and maybe doing that might teach that child something having to watch her baby leave in some one else arms...

Quoting Lyndsay:

That is disgusting to me. If I had a daughter who came home pregnant at the age of 11, I would haul her off to the nearest abortion clinic no questions asked. As for people in unindistrialized nations, I don't think they should be reproducing anyway (lets have 10 kids and watch all of them die of AIDS!).

Marcella - posted on 10/06/2009

try super hard to stop them... shop them that they would be making a mistake ir you have family that have a lil one ask if ur child can take care of them and when they get frustrated.... then have that talk with them... let them know how hard it would be to have to finish school and take care of a baby and get a job cuz mama not guna sit and take care or the grandbaby all day im sure they have to support thier own kids....

Peta - posted on 10/06/2009

that's just wrong... so very wrong.

Lyndsay - posted on 10/05/2009

That is disgusting to me. If I had a daughter who came home pregnant at the age of 11, I would haul her off to the nearest abortion clinic no questions asked. As for people in unindistrialized nations, I don't think they should be reproducing anyway (lets have 10 kids and watch all of them die of AIDS!).

Ginger - posted on 10/05/2009

I think that 11 is WAY to young to have a child!!! Not only does most kids that age only see that a baby is a CUTE accessory but they have no way to concieve of all of the work involved! Make sure to not sugar coat the trials and sleepless nights that are involved with babies when talking with child. I would also make sure to mention that there are many changes that your body goes thru when pregnant! Most children at this age are very self concious and think that everyones body will just "bounce-back" and that usually isnt the case. I hope I have helped. I believe that the grandparents would end up being the ones to raise the child and not the parent. Good luck, in a tough situation.

Samantha - posted on 10/04/2009

I am VERY upset with the fact that this topic was even posted and quite frankly think of it as starting more drama and debate then trying to get an answer. I lost my virginity at 12 and regret it. I was also living with older friends and was not in my parents custoday at 12 as well. I was in the care of the state but as far as that topic goes, DCF in CT is probably one of the worst states for child services (especially after the murder of more then one young baby by different social workers!)

In the state of Connecticut you arent even allowed to represent yourself as an adult until 18 but will be punished as an adult at 16. If you cant tell a judge you are guilty or not for your actions, what makes you think the state will EVER allow you to have a child at 11? I have met many young mothers, the youngest being 15, while in custody. After i rebelled and learned the hard way that LIFE IS NOT EASY BY YOURSELF, i decided that maybe i should share my experience with other people. Under 18 the state is advised to monitor you and your child ALL THE TIME, but that is only if you have a stable place to live and whom you are living with agrees to take responsibility for you and your child. You are a minor in CT until 18!!! The state will take your child if you do not have someone to take custody of he/she under the age of 16.

I am expecting my first child in February and she is my life. She may be unborn but all of me and my partners money has gone to things she will need and DAMN is she expensive already. It seems to me that the mother who posted this has a daughter who is 11 (or is very oddly curious) who is already having intercourse and wants a child OR this mother wants her daughter to have a child so she can raise BOTH of them. If this is the case i would advise her to either have another baby of her own or to seek one of those dolls that is very much like a real baby. Make your baby carry this "baby" around for a week. I doubt she will make it that long without getting bored with it or frustrated that it constatly cries and urinates and such. These dolls have chips that can be monitored constantly. Good luck with that.

I know that this obsurd conversation has got me and my partner in agreeance that we wouldnt want our daughter even thinking about sex at this age and i will do my best to explain to her that it is an adult act and is too large a responsibility for her to handle. If she is that set on trying to be mature (which is the ONLY reason children want to have sex) then she WILL protect herself...i.e. condoms AND birth control. And if i am thaat worried i will monitor her taking the pill until she is 16. After that she is responsible for her own actions and i can only hope i guided her in the right direction.

All in all i think it is VERY bad parenting to allow a child this young to have a baby. Precautions should be taken to avoid this. Watch 16 and pregnant on MTV. Really i dont think i have met anyone under 23 that doesnt feel very overwhelmed by having a child. Every mom wants to be perfect and hey, your 11 year old daughter cant even make her own money...Whats she going to do, buy diapers with allowance?!?!

Please, RETHINK WHAT YOU ARE ASKING!!!!

Cami - posted on 10/04/2009

Im sitting here in tears reading some of these opinions!! Yes, 11 is young. I cant believe some of you actually think that ALL teens are irresponsible. I sure the hell am responsible. Im a PROUD TEEN MOM!!! I probably do a better job then half of those mothers out there. Yes, that is bold statement. But i am. I would like to know when some of you feel is the appropriate age to have a child. So should a person who has a mental problem of any kind who is at the "acceptable" age to have a child, be able to have one? If my mom gave me an option whether or not tho have my babies, i would have left and not heard her crap for the rest of my life. And if should would have told me to get an abortion then i would have punched her in the face. and i love my mom so much. But my kids are beautiful, and the BEST things that have EVER happened to me. i finished high school with straight A's when my daughter was 3 months old. Im not getting any assistance of any kind. My husband works and supports all three of us. So yes it young, but it is her baby, and if the parents want to be so involved then they should have started to be involved when they got their period and started having sex. And the child molester thing, what if the boy was 12, thats not child molestation. Walk in a teen moms or a mom of a teen mom shoes for a day and then talk to me!!

Caitlin - posted on 10/04/2009

Wherewere there parents when they we making the babies but then again u would think ur baby and thats what they still are would be thinking about sex.. I believe age has nothing to do with having a child..its how mature and prepared u are to give up ur own life and start a new one as a parent i dont think its possible for an 11 yo to be ready for that and the baby deserves parents that are old enough to know wat is right for them

Laura - posted on 10/04/2009

WRONG!!!! i was 19 when i fell pregnant and although i feel im old enough to have a baby, it is still pretty young. u can only be a child once, having a baby means she has to be an adult. let her enjoy her youth

Iysha - posted on 10/04/2009

Quoting Marley:

Quoting Ava:

I don't believe that at 11 years old, it should be your child's decision whether or not to keep the baby. As a parent, until they're at least sixteen, I believe parents should make those decisions because children that young generally do not fully comprehend the rest of their lives or the hardships they might go through. They have -no- idea what it's like to not be tended to themselves, and to have to turn around and tend to another human being. If my child gets pregnant at 11, she will get an abortion. Period. I will allow her to have her own 'decision' if she is 16 or over, maybe. After 18, it is all on her. But I will not sit back and allow my child to possibly ruin their lives in an attempt to give them independence. You think that people should have children as young as 10? Here's the problem with that logic. Biologically, we can. Mentally, we can't. Humans are confusing creatures because we have cognitively evolved far beyond anything else. But physically, we're very lacking. Your body may be -ready- to have children at 10, but the mind does not tell a woman to have a child until after 18 generally because she has finished mentally developing (up until then, -she is a child-, because she is not fully developed). Most young teen pregnancies like that are NOT out of urge to have children, but out of incompetence and carelessness. I've also seen little black whores on Maury screaming, 'I wanted my four kids!', and she's 15. That alone should tell you that trusting an 11 year old's intuition about children is a no-go. Honestly, screw that. Again, my child -WILL- get an abortion if she is pregnant under the age of 16. It's a 50/50 shot between 16 and 17, and at 18 it's not my problem at all.

If your child ends up getting pregnant, it is not your choice whether or not to MURDER her child. And "little black whores" is a horrible stereotypical statement. You are just proving to everyone how much of a hypocrite you are. I bet an 11 year old is mature enough NOT to say something along the lines of "little black whores". Maybe you should think a bit more before spilling your opinions for us to read. Thanks.

I agree. This is a debate, and full of opinions. To state your opinion in such a irrational, illogical and immature way is just plain sad. You would think as mothers and at that, mothers that don't like to be called immature or childish we all would take into consideration how our statements make us sound and the effect it has on others reading them. I am ashamed to be labled in the same category as this mother. Young mothers are supposed to show the world how good they are and how they can strive to succeed in a society that belittles them. Not to prove those incopetant people right. I am truly embarrassed for you Ava.

Marley - posted on 10/04/2009

Quoting Ava:

I don't believe that at 11 years old, it should be your child's decision whether or not to keep the baby. As a parent, until they're at least sixteen, I believe parents should make those decisions because children that young generally do not fully comprehend the rest of their lives or the hardships they might go through. They have -no- idea what it's like to not be tended to themselves, and to have to turn around and tend to another human being. If my child gets pregnant at 11, she will get an abortion. Period. I will allow her to have her own 'decision' if she is 16 or over, maybe. After 18, it is all on her. But I will not sit back and allow my child to possibly ruin their lives in an attempt to give them independence. You think that people should have children as young as 10? Here's the problem with that logic. Biologically, we can. Mentally, we can't. Humans are confusing creatures because we have cognitively evolved far beyond anything else. But physically, we're very lacking. Your body may be -ready- to have children at 10, but the mind does not tell a woman to have a child until after 18 generally because she has finished mentally developing (up until then, -she is a child-, because she is not fully developed). Most young teen pregnancies like that are NOT out of urge to have children, but out of incompetence and carelessness. I've also seen little black whores on Maury screaming, 'I wanted my four kids!', and she's 15. That alone should tell you that trusting an 11 year old's intuition about children is a no-go. Honestly, screw that. Again, my child -WILL- get an abortion if she is pregnant under the age of 16. It's a 50/50 shot between 16 and 17, and at 18 it's not my problem at all.

If your child ends up getting pregnant, it is not your choice whether or not to MURDER her child. And "little black whores" is a horrible stereotypical statement. You are just proving to everyone how much of a hypocrite you are. I bet an 11 year old is mature enough NOT to say something along the lines of "little black whores". Maybe you should think a bit more before spilling your opinions for us to read. Thanks.

Marley - posted on 10/04/2009

Quoting Rachel:

and technically a 11 year old body, isn't capable of even having a health baby, most likely would end up have a baby with health issue or a preemie. as well as any age through 11-18. and might i mention a 11 year old isn't even capable of make there own decisions yet.

I am 17 and my "body" created a very very healthy baby.

Shameka - posted on 10/04/2009

Well in reality a girl can have a child has soon as she has sex with or without her menstrual cycle because she is born with every egg she will ever has. All it takes is for a sperm to meet that egg. In this mind mothers need to take care of there daughters and not allow them to become pregnant because their bodies are not fully ready. So in this reality that if they become pregnant and there mothers allow it then there mothers are allowing them to put themselves in danger.

Iysha - posted on 10/04/2009

You know, my friend in middle school got pregnant at 12 and had her baby a month after her 13th birthday. She had a lot of support from her parents and together, they took care of her child. Even a couple of her friends would come over and help her with the baby whild she got ready for school. It isn't impossible for a person that age to raise a child with help. The girl is now a 20 year old woman who has since had 2 more children, the youngest is now 5 months and she is doing real good for herself. She has a great job, living with her significant other, and very happy.



Children having children is not perferred, but who are we to make decisions for other people? We all want to show support for young mothers...We all were young mothers at one point and most of us did need help from our families and friends when caring for our children.



It is up to the pregnant girl to decide if she wants the baby or not. The law (at least here in California) states that when a minor child is pregnant, she is considered an adult and is to make the decisions reguarding her child on her own. However once she has given birth to the child, she is no longer considered an adult and the decisions making goes over to the mother's parents.



The girl in question should have support from her parents and her parents should help HER make an informed decision about her child. Sure, her decision can and will be questionable, but it is her decision reguardless and everyone should respect her decision.



Like I said, it is her decision, her life, her choice. It is not impossible to care for a child with help and an abortion is not a wrong choice either.



If the child in question is not pregnant yet, her parents should try and keep her that way until she becomes a more responsible, more informed adult. I mean, if she isn't pregnant yet, she should be told that she has her whole life to bring children into this world and it is better to bring them into a world where they have all they need readily available to them. Instead of having a child and having to struggle to provide for that child, why not wait to have that child at a more convenient time and age.

Cassie - posted on 10/04/2009

Ava, What are you teaching your child by forcing an abortion? All you will teach is that an abortion is an acceptable form of birth control.

If a parent is not able to teach their child to respect her body at a young age and not have sex until they are in a committed relationship and out of school, then the family has to deal with the consequences. They would need to decide whether or not to keep the baby or give it up for adoption but abortion is NOT birth control and should not be forced upon anyone. You all are young mothers; how would you have felt if your parents had forced you to get an abortion when you told them you were pregnant?

Ava - posted on 10/04/2009

I don't believe that at 11 years old, it should be your child's decision whether or not to keep the baby. As a parent, until they're at least sixteen, I believe parents should make those decisions because children that young generally do not fully comprehend the rest of their lives or the hardships they might go through. They have -no- idea what it's like to not be tended to themselves, and to have to turn around and tend to another human being. If my child gets pregnant at 11, she will get an abortion. Period. I will allow her to have her own 'decision' if she is 16 or over, maybe. After 18, it is all on her. But I will not sit back and allow my child to possibly ruin their lives in an attempt to give them independence. You think that people should have children as young as 10? Here's the problem with that logic. Biologically, we can. Mentally, we can't. Humans are confusing creatures because we have cognitively evolved far beyond anything else. But physically, we're very lacking. Your body may be -ready- to have children at 10, but the mind does not tell a woman to have a child until after 18 generally because she has finished mentally developing (up until then, -she is a child-, because she is not fully developed). Most young teen pregnancies like that are NOT out of urge to have children, but out of incompetence and carelessness. I've also seen little black whores on Maury screaming, 'I wanted my four kids!', and she's 15. That alone should tell you that trusting an 11 year old's intuition about children is a no-go. Honestly, screw that. Again, my child -WILL- get an abortion if she is pregnant under the age of 16. It's a 50/50 shot between 16 and 17, and at 18 it's not my problem at all.

Ruby - posted on 10/04/2009

Wrong i think ! 11 year olds are still Children themselves. Its too big of a responsibilty for children to be bringing up children. Parents that are 'letting' their 11 year old kids have babies are CRAZY ! An 11 year old is not mature enough to understand what they are getting themselves into by bringing a child into this world. Babies dont ask to born neither do they ask for such irresponsible parents.

Alisha - posted on 10/03/2009

That is completely insane an 11 year old is not mentally capable of taking care of a child, their still children themselves. I'm 17 and barely able to handle all of this.

Sarah - posted on 05/25/2009

WHAT?! thats just wrong. they are in there last year of primary school/1st year of high school .. not even a teenager yet.


shouldn't even be having sex.

its like a child having a child. wrong.





i was sort of innocent at that age

Christina - posted on 05/24/2009

i agree who ever gets an 11 yr old pregnant is a child molester. i cant even imagine an 11 yr old thinking about sex or having kids. their parents should be ashamed of letting their kids go out and have sex, what are they thinking. to me the parents should have their kids taken away from them

Christina - posted on 05/24/2009

i agree who ever gets an 11 yr old pregnant is a child molester. a child being that young should not be thinking about sex, let alone having a child. who ever is letting their child go out and have sex and get pregnant shouldnt be aloud to have their kids. obviously they arent responsible enough to have kids either.

Mel - posted on 05/24/2009

very wrong. anyone who gets an 11 year old pregnant is a child molester

TYMICA - posted on 05/22/2009

I THINK THAT IS WAY TO YOUNG IM GETTING READY TO TURN 20 I I JUST HAD MY FIRST CHILD LAST YEAR THREE MONHTS BEFORE FOR I WAS 19 AND IT IS HARD WITH THE TIME ARE IN NOW

Amy - posted on 05/22/2009

i definetly dnt agree they should be sexually active but i dont think its about leeting ur child have a baby its not really up to the parents

Lauren - posted on 05/21/2009

I'm against babies having babies!!! OMG, 11? If that were the case, the child obviously does not have enough supervision! They are being exposes to the media much too soon! I would make my child give their baby up for adoption or take care of it myself. But yes I understand in some cultures that is completely acceptable, but is it right? absolutely not!

Tanya - posted on 05/06/2009

If a child at 11 has sex, Obviously the parents dont even know. But I would definately make my child have the kid, because I am against Abortion.

Holly. - posted on 05/04/2009

OMG this is soooo wrong there is no way i would allow her let alone "LET" her!! At 11 you in the eyes of the law are still a child and in england at 11 you start high school, so this is ridic!! 11 is far to young to have a baby.

Sharleen - posted on 05/04/2009

Having a baby at 11 is so wrong! Having a baby at 13, 14, 15, 16 is bad enough but at 11..that is just ridiculous! You may be more responsible at 14,15,and 16 but you are still a baby yourself so how could an 11 year old do it. You are not finished mentally developing yet( which you don't do until your in your 20"s anyway), you can't get a job to support yourself and the baby, and you probably still live in the world of 'ME' as Liseandra said. It is totally irresponsible to even be having sex at such a young age! Yes it is true that in some cultures and countries little girls are married off and having babies as soon as they get their periods but that does not make it any less wrong or disturbing. Now alot of 11 year olds have body's that you would see on an adult so it can be hard to believe that that person is only 11 and the same thing goes for boys as well. These babies are having babies and for what? ..some shitty sex that probably wasn't even done right, wanting to be cool in the eyes of your friends or whatever the reasons are ppl have sex so young.It's disgusting. would you want your 11 or 12 year old to be having sex and getting STD's and pregnant? NO I don't think you would. Anyone who would let their child behave like this does not deserve to have a child in the first place! That being said, how do you really stop someone from having sex? If your child wants to have sex, you better believe that they are going to have sex. All you can do is try to raise your kids right and support them. and it's just unfortunate that the grandparents end up raising their grandbabies or kicking their kids out of the house. I think that if you thought you were old enough to have sex, then you should be old enough to deal with the consequences of your actions! I'm not saying that having a baby at 11 is in any way o.k. but hey.. if you make your bed , you sure as hell better lie in it :) You made the mess and now it's up to you to clean it up.

Rachel - posted on 05/03/2009

and might i add, what kind of mother would even allow that to happen..

Liseandra - posted on 05/02/2009

this is actually very disturbing. a 11 year old can't even care for themselves properly let alone another human being!!!!!! its a baby having a baby pretty much. no one should be having sex at that age.... I think i was still playing with barbies and dolls and all that when i was 11... everything about that just sickens me. an 11 year old isnt capable to have a baby, yeah the period is there, but mentally and physically and emotionally and everything their just not capable to handle, 1-the pregnancy, 2- the birth of the baby and 3 they can't even get a job to support themselves!! It's the 'all about me' stage when your that age. and on top of that who is the one getting these 11 year olds pregnant in the first place??? im thinking that a 11 to probably about 14-15 year old boy can't even make a baby... im no doctor or anything but thats just what im thinking... so then that would mean that they would be having to have sex with older boys/men whatever the situation is, which is really sickening! everything about the thought is very.... unsettling and disturbing i guess the words are... its just not right. sorry for the little bit of the rant...and i hope no one takes offense to that or takes it the wrong way.

Emma - posted on 05/02/2009

i don't know where any of you are from but i am sure most if not all of you would agree that it is just not rite to let your 11 year old child have babys and hear in the uk if you let your 11 year old child go out haveing sex and have babys you would be classed as a irrisponcible parent and the social services would either make you take full responcibilaty for the baby or they would take the baby away at birth cos at 11 years old you are just not ready to have that kind of responcibilaty

Rachel - posted on 05/02/2009

and technically a 11 year old body, isn't capable of even having a health baby, most likely would end up have a baby with health issue or a preemie. as well as any age through 11-18. and might i mention a 11 year old isn't even capable of make there own decisions yet.