3 year old waking a lot in the middle night and wanting to sleep in parents bed

Carree - posted on 02/18/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Hi, I have a 3 year old son who had been sleeping with me. I am trying to break him of this habit for the past 3 weeks. He keeps waking up in the middle of the night and and trying to get into the bed. I tell him to go back to his bed and he does then a half hour later ,,,, he is trying again. I have sometimes taken him back to his bed as well. I am soooo tired during the day for the interrupted sleep. Also, he wakes up at 5AM and is ready for the day. I really try to get him in bed by 6:30pm every night, pending my work schedule. If he has a nap during the day, then he trys to get out of his bed at bedtime. But if he doesn't have a nap he is so tired he stays in his bed. The reason he was sleeping with me is I had a newborn at home and sleep was a priority for me so I could function at home with three small children (now 1,2,3)



I need some guidance on the sleep issues. I want him to stay in his bed all night so I can have some sleep and he won't wake up the other kids when he runs down the hall to my room.



We do have a night time routine which is bath, eat, watch a show, read 2 books, sing a night song and then bed.



I also would like to put my 2 year old in a toddler bed, but can't let go of the crib b/c it keeps her in bed at night.



Anyone out there that can help would be wonderful.

One tired mommy with a frustrated husband!

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Jessica - posted on 02/21/2009

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My daughter is 2 and has also recently started coming into our bed at night.  I'm trying to just carry her back in each time hoping that a few sleep deprived nights will pay off in the end, but I just started so I don't know what the end result will be (ie who will cave first).  But as far as the waking early it could be that he only needs 10 or 11 hours of sleep now that he's getting older and that if you want him to sleep in later you will have to put him to bed later.  My daughter goes to bed at 9 and wakes up at 7 and usually takes an hour or 2 hour nap in the afternoon.  Without the nap we have a cranky evening but I still don't let her go to bed before 8 or she will get up at 5 am.

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Kathleen - posted on 02/23/2009

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i kno eexactly where you are coming from.. i allowed my son to climb in bed with me at night when he was younger because of the convience and my husbands worked at night so he wasnt there to bother.. but he started even on the weekends climbing in between us and going back to sleep .. i found that when he came in i would walk him back to his room and tell him it was night time and that when the sun came up he could come into our bed.. i even talked to him about it in the morning and at our bedtimeroutine...i would remind him that it is dark outside and when it is dark he needed ot sleep in his bed.. and that when the sun came up he could come and snuggle in our bed,,, this worked it took a week or so and still to this day once a in a while he still wanders in, weather it be he had to go to the bath room or had a dream or needed ahug, i just walk him back in cover him get him all snuggled in and as i kiss him tell him i will see him when the sun comes up...

they are very bright kids they know the differnce from the dark/night/moon and the sun... use that as a time frame especially since telling time is harder to teach at this age..

good luck hope all goes well

Jen - posted on 02/21/2009

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I have a 3year old son to who has always slept in our bed but i am also trying to get him in to his own bed,and since he is in his own room he to his waking at night and is trying to get up for the day at 6 he goes to bed everynight at 6as he doesnt have aday time nap n is so tierd with going to pre school,

i dont no what we can do but i thought it might be nice to no your not alone,

Im also going through the whole cot thing to i dont want to take it away from my daughter as its just so much easyer having it,

Jeni - posted on 02/19/2009

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We also were having a problem with our son coming into our room in the middle of the night.  He has never been allowed to sleep in our bed so we are not sure why he is suddenly doing this.  This week we started a new "policy".  I printed out a calendar and for every night he goes to bed without fussing and stays in his bedroom, except to go potty, he gets to put a sticker on the calendar and after 5 stickers he gets a new "hot wheel" (these cars are his life).  So far he has 3 stickers for all three nights and he is already trying to figure out what car he is going to get on Saturday.  You can change this anyway you want, and use it for just about anything, you just need to find what is important to him.  Good Luck!  Jeni

Jeanna - posted on 02/19/2009

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As far as the crib goes, get a toddler bed and keep the crib for a while (unless its a convertible crib).  You will be suprised at how well she does.  I put my daughter in a toddler bed at 16 months and she loved it.  It was her "big girl" bed.  We just shut the door to her room and she did great.  Give your daughter a chance, she might prove to you that she is ready for her big girl bed.



 



My daughter is going through the phase of coming to my room too.  we put a sleeping bag down and she will lay there.  I know it doesnt fix the problem but it allows us to sleep at night.  Hopefully she will get sick of it and go back to her own bed.

Sandy - posted on 02/18/2009

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I am a mother of 4 ( 5mo., 2, 4, 5 ) so I know where you are coming from with wanting sleep. We have a rule for our older 2. If they come in our room at night they can not come in bed with us but they can sleep on our floor. You have to realize your son is 3 now and has two younger siblings and is wanting mommys attention. I personally would stop letting him in your bed an let him stay on the floor. Have a blanket and pillow somewhere where HE can get it in the middle of the night and let him lay himself down. He will feel like ok mom stills lets me in her room, but wait I don't want to do all this my self. After a little while he will stay in his bed that his mommy tucked him into that night. Let me know how it goes.

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