Biting, Scratching, and pinching....How do I stop

April - posted on 05/27/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Hello. I need some advice on how to stop my 20 month old from biting, scratching, and pinching. We have tried telling her nicely that it hurts and that she must stop. We have tried "time-out". She isn't biting as much at day care any lonoger, because she seems to be able to communicate better, but the teachers still have to watch her closely. She has scratched my face up with the scratching and hitting. What can we do to get through to her?

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Angela - posted 5 days ago

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wondering if anyone got advice my 3yr old is in headstart at an pulpic school and when first started she was pinching then went to scratching i was getting calls and signing papers we let her see an behavioral speaclist and she starting to approve but offsly not good enough it stoped then she started back when it sstop her teacher says it be great to send her on to prek but now they want her stay in headstart me and her daddy want her go on but if it contunes she be out the program and advice

Tiffany - posted on 03/19/2014

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My 2 year old is very sneaky with hers. She gets a lick in with her brother and she runs away. I think she know it's wrong. But she bites and pinches and scratches also and 5 month old lil brother had some bruises on him. I was so scared I didn't know what to do. She's so fast with it I turn my head and when it turn back he's screaming. Please can I get some advice??!!

Kristen - posted on 08/04/2010

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my 17 month old scratches and pinches my face and neck. It has gotten worse since her sister was born (now 5 weeks old) and she hits, scratches and pinches her too. I always know when she is about to do it though, she gives me a 'look' as if to test what I will do. But by yelling, smacking, telling off etc, it is giving her the attention she wants. Kids are happy with any attention, whether it be positive or negative! While I am not against smacking when necessary, I have found the best way to handle it is to put her down and walk away from her. She is seeking attention and by removing her from the situation and ignoring her, she is slowly doing it less & less.

Sharis - posted on 08/04/2010

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It is a very difficult call because our first instinct is to teach them by example, which could mean pinching her back. Many say that it's a period that is natural and will pass with time and patience. You defenitely want to discourage the behavior. Young children may bite for different reasons, and not all will respond to the same types of intervention. Identifying the kind of biter you're dealing with will help you develop an appropriate discipline technique.

Is it their surroundings, are they looking for personal power? Maybe they need more choices or distractions. I personally do not believe in hiting or biting a child whatsoever.

One thing I learned from being in Early Childhood Education sometime ago, as well as partnering with my daughters montessori school is to moniter the behavior and discect where the root of the problem lies....whatever the problem is.

It's hard I know, good luck!

Yael - posted on 08/04/2010

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Krystle - I can't believe that you teach your kid not to bite, by biting her -- and teach her not to hit by hitting her. Is this what you call consistency?

Krystle - posted on 05/27/2009

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my daughter went through that stage as well. I know it sounds bad but with the biting, bite her back, just enough where it kind of hurts her and then explain that it hurts and we dont bite. Hitting is another issue i still have with my daughter. We spank her and put her in timeout and when she gets out we explain that hitting is not nice and it hurts people. You just have to stay consistant. With your daughter being it daycare it may be a little bit harder cause she is around kids that do it so she is going to do whatever the other kids are. Just stay positive and consistent. She will grow out of it.

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