Calling all potty training mommy-experts!

Heather - posted on 10/14/2010

I like the idea of going cold turkey, once they have success on the potty ditch the diapers completely (except maybe at night). When he is successful shower him with tons of praise "awsome job" "you must be so proud of yourself" "I am so proud of you" "You must feel like such a big kid" "im so excited for you" "you must be so excited you stayed dry adn used the potty when you needed to",etc...when there is an accident put it back on him "oh no, that must feel so yucky" "Im so sorry we did not make it to the potty in time, we'll do netter next time", "Oh honey, i know that must feel really icky, im sorry we did not make it but next time will be better". etc. And just stay relaxed about it and know that whether you potty train your kid at 18 months or at 5 there will be accidents but the more consistant you are the easier it is for both of you and going back and forth between diaper and undies is not good at all. I found some really good training pants they are trim and have PUL layer inbetween but all cotton against kid and outside, they are called blueberry trainers, they are kinda expensive but well worth it i think (I dispise pull ups becasue they are just expensive diapers and theydo not really help with the process on most kids i know). Good luck

Cassandra - posted on 10/13/2010

My son does the same thing I don't know any other way to get him to go in the potty

Leigh - posted on 10/13/2010

Use regualar undies... When my little girl was at that point, I started with panties and then after a few weeks she was potty trained!!!

Monica - posted on 10/12/2010

we started my son off to early in pull up like a yr lol but he doin great now we just one day ran out of diapers and was like let do it so it started off great till we were getting up in the middle of the night changing sheet or making sure he goes to the rest roo once a hour we were geting up NOT FUN so what we did is he stay in undies during the day and at night he will be in night time pull ups and we been doin tht for about a year now and he doin goo he stayin dry at night but in the next few weeks he goin in to surgery he had hypospadias and it was not healed properly so for the mom who are just starting out potty training dont kil ur self they will get it done eaither way

Gurjit - posted on 10/11/2010

I have the same problem with my 2 almost 3 year old daughter.... they sale padded underwear at wal-mart made by gerber...there not to padded n look like regular underwear....is she has an accident it stays in there and not on her clothes or the floor...try those.

Jami - posted on 10/10/2010

I let my lil man run around naked and didnt push him to do it

Charlene - posted on 10/10/2010

get rid of the diapers only during the day, night time comes later when they have mastered the day time.

Charlene - posted on 10/10/2010

So much patience is needed with potty training. I just went through my 3rd child and one thing I learned was to let it go don't get mad stick with encouragement. When he pees in his clothes tell him that yucky and not allowed anymore and tell him next time go pee on the potty. I know it seems simple but if you react too much then he's getting something out of it. So act like it doesn't bother you and stick with encouraging. Its amazing how thing can change with kids one day he's peeing in his pants and then all of a sudden he will just start peeing on the potty it really does happen just like that. My daughter wouldn't poo on the potty and when we were at the point when we were ready to give up she just stood up and asked to go on the potty and she never pooed in her pants again. My son was the same way. So don't worry it will happen just stay calm don't show ur frustration. Goodluck! Oh another tip once he was in undies I never went to the diaper I brought the potty w me everywhere I didn't care who saw or where we were my son was training and that was how we did it, and I tell you we had some funny moments with that, but you know what it works. So if your driving pull over, in the parking lot open the trunk just bring wipes and bag along in case! This tip does work!

Jessica - posted on 10/08/2010

We potty trained over the weekend. The result only a couple of accidents and one intentional poopy in the hallway. I would suggest REAL undies only. Include him in the decision and bring him to the store to buy big boy undies. Than have you son throw out the training pants. It gives him the control and empowerment while the decision is being made. Than if he pees on himself he will be very uncomfortable and won't do it again. I work in a preschool and have seen this work for multiple parents who are in between the training times. When we as parents waver between being trained and training for a long period of time we tend to confuse the kids. If they know they have to use the potty or they potty on themselves than they usually choose the toilet. ALSO cut out the drinks after dinner and no more than one or two sips if they are asking before bed. Huge help for dry overnights!

Shawn - posted on 10/08/2010

I would get him his "Big Boy Underwear" reinforce how he is a big boy and has to tell you. That is what worked for my daughter once I put her in " Big Girl Panties" and always took her with my to show her how big girls go potty she picked it up really rather quickly. I have also found when it is cloth underwear they have an accident in it is more uncomfortable than pull ups and such. The pull ups were to much like a diaper for my children to understand they needed to tell me when they had to go.

Shannon - posted on 10/08/2010

Hey my 2 cents in what worked with my son.... no pull ups no training pants and if u r having trouble with undies, make a big deal of going commando (pants on, no underwear) It worked like a charm for me. If i had him wearing anything he associated it with diapers and went in his pants. When he was commando, success. We had him that way for 2 to 3 weeks and no problems after that! Good Luck in whatever you try!!

Tiffany - posted on 10/08/2010

Just wanted to agree with a lot of the mamas below...

ESPECIALLY for a boy, it often is past 3 years old before they're ready. You CAN get them "trained" before then, but is it really worth all the work and stress on your part?

Kids grow up... It'll happen!! Keep the time in perspective. It seems like forever right now, but what's a year in the grand scheme of your whole life?

Sheri - posted on 10/07/2010

A friend of mine told me that she used a tin coffee can to potty train her 3 boys and they were trained in 3 days cause they loved the sound it made when they pee'd in it.

Katherine - posted on 10/07/2010

Well, since he goes to the bathroom fine without the potty training pants - I wouldn't use them anymore. Just use regular underware. Also, make a point to have him try to go once say every 2hrs or 20mins after every drink. If you keep up this routine, his body will begin to remind himself and he go on his own.

Chaylee - posted on 10/07/2010

I had a similar situation with my son. I finally had enough and threw out the diapers and training underwear and went to big boy underwear. From then on in he told me when he needed to go and we only had 1 accident on the first day. Granted the first day we didn't leave the house. I think he knew he had the freedom to go if he had training pants on. Why bother getting up when he could just go in his pants. I think it was part laziness and his tough will. In the end I just had to lay down the law.

Anne - posted on 10/06/2010

A lot of the advice you're getting is really good advice, except that your son is only 21 months old! My youngest son is about the same age, and I'm thrilled that he told me that he peed in his diaper. That tells me that he's ready to start training. But you can't expect that the learning will come all at once. 80% while naked and 25% while clothed and distracted by other things is pretty good. And I thoroughly recommend diapers at bedtime. Once the 25% gets up to 80%, then go for cloth underwear. Otherwise, you're doing a lot of laundry, and he's getting shame that he doesn't need at this age.

My 2 cents.

Amy - posted on 10/05/2010

It's funny how it works not using pull up's or anything but it actually works.they feel that and ewwwwww.....nobody likes sitting in wet pants and clothes, it's uncomfortable so a lot of times they'll catch on pretty quick :)

Lydia - posted on 10/05/2010

No to the pull ups, but yes to regular underwear. I had the same problem with my Ian. I only use pull ups to sleep with at night..due to accidents. When he starts wake in up with dry pull ups they are gone for good

Jane - posted on 10/02/2010

i limited training time to post breakfast time, i'd load her up w/lots and lots of juice and shredded mini-wheats so could succeed, she's pee and poop, get candies and then when she was mostly done, i'd put her in her diaper and call it a day. when she started telling me she had to go, then i'd take off her diaper. i found it much more manageable than all-day training. i think they need a break too from it all. it will happen, i know it seems like it will be going on forever but he'll get better at it. it is a work in progress and a labor of love.

Bridgette Renea - posted on 10/01/2010

I took my daughter to pick out her panties and she like the fact that she gotten to pick out her own undies, try this if you have not already.

Danelle - posted on 09/30/2010

WHAT I DID WAS PUT CEREAL IN THE POTTY AND AND TOLD MY SON TO SINK THEM AND WHEN HE DID I GAVE HIM A SUGAR FREE POP. HE GOT IT IN ONE DAY..

Janaki - posted on 09/29/2010

For me, it worked well because we did it in phases:
With your case, I think you're through with phases 1 -3 because he's already using the potty. Phase 4 - this is kinda tricky and the hardest because there will really be sidetracks and it's like 2 steps forward and 1 step back thing. Just be patient with him and with the laundry :) With my daughter, we started her on potty training at age 14months and by 24 months she's totally off the diaper even at night time. Phase 4 will still require you to put him on diapers at night and some day outs. Some kids on potty training will start to feel uncomfortable when they still pee on their diapers, that maybe the case with your son. If he ask to pee when on diapers that's a good, means he's already conscious. Gradually(chose the best time) start on putting only panties when you go out in public. Then, try a few more public outings without his diapers until he gets used to it. Phase 5 will be night time without diapers, I decided to make this the last phase bec this is one messy feat but at least the time he's off diaper is more than when he is on them so somehow he has control of his urge to pee. You will have to be ready with laundry or getting up in the middle of the night to accompany him to pee. Goodluck mommy, you will get there! :)

Sheena - posted on 09/28/2010

I read somewhere the average age for a child to be toilet trained is 27 months. I think it is a bit too young for your child to go without diapers.

Wendy - posted on 09/28/2010

I would suggest do away with eveything, use only undies. Let him pick out the undies. And not sure how much money you have but with my girls if they pooped in them they got to see me put them in the trash. So they only did that 2 times. And he needs lots of encouragement. I would praise my girls every time they went.

Jessica - posted on 09/27/2010

I do the undies and diaper at nap & night time, I'm with you...I have enough laundry to do.

Cheri - posted on 09/27/2010

i'd recommend not putting diapers on him at all anymore... well except for bedtime.

Shaundra - posted on 09/27/2010

I'd have to agree with Marcy. We made a huge production out of giving the diapers and training pants to babies that need them. She picked out her own panties at the store. It was pretty smooth sailing from there. I know some mom's offer a reward to several days with no accidents. Maybe that will work for you. Find something he really wants and dangle it in front of him. Motivation to succeed.

Sara - posted on 09/27/2010

i took away the diapers and just put my daughter in panties. only put a pull up on her when we went to town for the first week. and "specail night time panties" pull up on at night for first 2-3 weeks. now shes fully trained and its only been little over a month. i had been trying to train her since she was 15 months old, shell be 3 in 4 months. i had tried so many ways and nothing worked with her but this time i went about it the mean way. it worked for her though and i think she was also ready this time, and so was i. good luck

Heidi - posted on 09/26/2010

How I got my son to stop wetting his clothes so much is the fact that I made him take off this own wet clothes. But with boys the easiest is trying to get them to pee on their own without accidents than the other stuff. maybe girls are different and easier.

Lisa - posted on 09/26/2010

My son was the exact same! One question, does he pee sitting or standing? This made the magical difference for my son. He had everything down perfectly as long as he was home and naked, but put undies on him or take him to a public bathroom with automatic flushers that are loud and he was peeing in his pants. Once he figured out standing he had a much easier time and has only had one accident in about 6 months! We are now working on now wet beds but kept the pull ups for overnight. Keep working with him, he sounds like he's on the right track. Try a day in full clothes and regular undies. he will be able to feel it more if he has an accident, 2 of my nephews were trained like that, alot of laundry for a day or two but then they were trained. good luck!

Hailey - posted on 09/26/2010

like my 2 year old she will go on her potty as soon as i put knickers on her she will wet through them and nt tell me

Heidi - posted on 09/26/2010

I didn't know that kids could use employees only restrooms. that is pretty cool.

Fil - posted on 09/25/2010

You've gone with his lead, which is great!

Our youngest was into it early too, but I think this was mostly because he idolizes his big brother and follows him EVERYWHERE... :-)

We let him pick out his own underwear at the store, which worked pretty well for him because he would be very upset if he got "Lightning" dirty and had to switch to a different pair... LOL

I LOVE the idea of the pin!! I totally wish someone had brought that up when we were potty training either of ours - what a great way to both celebrate their successes and visually remind their caregivers that they still need help and reminders now and then!!!

We initially would put pull-ups on him when we went out or in the car, but I made sure I knew where all the restrooms were (I can bee-line to the restrooms even in the local grocery stores around here...) While we were out, I'd ask him when we passed a restroom, but also watched his body cues to know when we were going to have to start looking for a restroom for him (which is how we found out that the grocery stores will let kids use the restrooms in the "employees only" areas around here... LOL)

I'd say to mostly continue to do what you're doing and stay at his pace. Little things (like his own big-boy underwear, and that previously mentioned pin) will further cement his idea of becoming a big boy and might just be the final push you've been looking for... Good Luck! :-)

Heidi - posted on 09/25/2010

have you tried putting big boy underwear on him...my son started going more often on his own at home and in public when he knew he didn't like wet clothes. But also may need to take him when ever you see a restroom to keep a consistent schedule.

Jennifer - posted on 09/24/2010

Diapers and pull ups provide a lot of security. I bought my son regular undies (and let him pick them out) and that's what he wore. If he had an accident he would get wet and it would run down his legs which he hated!!! It encouraged him to always tell me when he had to go no matter what. I think the key is consistency. I think I confused him when I kept switching back and forth between the underwear and pull ups. So, finally I stuck with underwear and that was it. I got a puddle pad for his car seat and kept lots of clean clothes in the car.

Jennifer - posted on 09/24/2010

I know he's still pretty young for it and the reason we got to potty training is because he started sitting on the potty on his own and going (because I've had it out for quite some time now). So we just ran with it. Many times I just want to hang it up but at the same time, we are at the brink of success so I feel like we should stick with it. I never force him and if he seems upset at all I just let it go. I was just hoping there was some kind of last gentle push I could give him to get him through it. Frankly, if all or nothing doesn't work after a few weeks I'll just go back to what we were doing and let it continue to progress the way it will. :)

Marcy - posted on 09/24/2010

Good luck but now that I know his age I agree that 21 months is really young. if he is not having fun with it and isn't in to it, let it go. We didn't really start focusing much on it until our son turned 3. Of course he was the last one to move up from the nursery to preschool because he didn't really get it until he was about 3 1/2 years old. The way I look at it is, they have their entire lives to deal with pressure and stress, not worth it at such a young age. If he gets upset, just hang it up, toss the pull ups on and call it a day.

Teresa - posted on 09/24/2010

Time. My girls were the same way. Naked they had 100% success rate... ANY bottoms on and the success rate went down to 50% (if that). They were naked a lot at home, but in pull ups whenever we went out or they were sleeping. It worked for us quite well.

My son (at 2.5) is the same way, so at home he's naked a lot and when we are out he is in diapers (pull ups are too expensive for me to handle now).

I just read where he is only 21 months! Yeah, my advice totally stands. He will get it when he's ready. My girls were about 3 months shy of 3 when we did away w/ the pull ups (except at night time) and as I said... my son is 2.5.

Jennifer - posted on 09/24/2010

Oh, I love the idea of the pin! I will definitely give that a try. He is almost 21 months old.

Alright..... we're going to do this! Wish me sanity and a little luck ;)

Marcy - posted on 09/24/2010

How old is he? Yes, scratch the diapers and the pull ups except at night or nap time. Your daycare should be open to the idea of sending him to the potty regularly. its supposed to be messy for us...that's our job right? HAHA. if you are at the gym or bible study its only for a few hours. Just let the teacher know that she needs to send him to to the potty a few times. I think its important to not be adjusting his needs based on where you are. if he can tell you he has to go to the bathroom when you are out in public then you are more than half way there.....just go with it. I made my son a pin for his shirt (I just covered up an old pin) that said "Bog boy in potty training." He wore it with pride for 3 weeks at school and it also reminded his teachers to make sure to send him frequently. he will do great. Praise the success and just clean up the mess.

Jennifer - posted on 09/24/2010

Do you guys mean to be done with the diapers and training pants completely, all the time? That's going to be a lot of messes and laundry ;) I will try that out (except naps and nighttime though, right?) and we'll see how it goes. I know every child is different, but how long do you think it will take before it finally clicks this way? And what do I do when he is in daycare while I am at the gym or at bible study. I'm not too sure they will be on-board with changing wet clothes if he has an accident?

Marcy - posted on 09/24/2010

Agreed with Dora below....its one way all the time. Take him to the store and let him pick out big boy undies and then let him watch when you throw away his training undies and his diapers....

Dora - posted on 09/24/2010

I would recommend not using training pants at all. Go straight to his little undies and see how he does. I notice with my son if we use undies he uses the toilet. If I put a pull up on him he goes right in his pull up.