how many kids is too much ???
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Shayna - posted on 10/24/2009
It is a pretty simple solution. If you want a big family, then have as many children as possible as long as you can afford it. Finances in a large family is the # 1 stress. With finances comes larger homes, vehicles, more groceries, more everything! If you can not afford to be having children then why are you willingly having them?. In the end it is your body & life you can have as many as you want to.
Veronica - posted on 10/19/2009
I sorta agree with the majority of the ladies on here. However, my husband and I have five children, and we are on baby number six as I speak. And we are not done. We do not consider finances in our decision, we do not consider time in our decision. We consider Love in our decision. (now dont take this as preaching - this is what WE live by) The Lord says: Do not worry about what you will eat, wear, or where you will live - I will provide these things for you -- Worry about your soul. When you leave this earth, that is all that you will have.
That is what we live by. And the Lord has abundantly provided for us the last 7 1/2 years. When my husband was in between jobs - the Lord provided him with side jobs that helped maintain food and clothing. When finances dropped - Foodstamps and Medical coverage were there to subsidize - when he provided us with finances, we no longer needed the county help. Clothes are never a problem as we both have large families ourselves, and we all swap clothes - I sent clothes to my brothers and their wives for their babies - my aunts, and mother in law sent us stuff too. The Lord has provided for us to where the our children have beds to sleep in, a roof over their heads, and food in their bellies. Our job is to do our part in maintaining those things, and teach our children His laws, morals and values. That is all we need to raise our family. And having a lot of kids is welcomed in our home. Whatever the Lord gives us, we take as a gift from Him - we treasure and cherish every single one of our children.
To conclude. It isnt about what others think - its about what you and your spouse want. Its no one else's business if you want 15 children, or 1 - that is entirely on you and your spouse. Do what feels right for you and your family. I know I am.
Maggie - posted on 10/19/2009
There are so many factors to consider. Can you financially support them? Will you have enough time to spend with them. Do you have the patience to deal with all of them?
Also the reason for having them - do you love kids or do you just want another tiny cute cuddly baby? Age and health comes into it, too.
In the end it's a decision that only you can make.
Terrie - posted on 10/24/2009
you go girl!! we have 6 but I think that is it unless some miraculous steroid hits me--I am 36 and trying to keep up with hormonal teenagers and toddlers--anyone have any advice?? When do we have time for just me!? And the hubby--we'll that is another story--sex--what is that?
Beth - posted on 10/19/2009
I think it's different for everyone. I think the biggest thing to consider next to can you afford it is, How many can you handle and give enough attention to. I've ofter heard of children in a big family that felt neglected because they got lost in the numbers. I have three children and I want to really know each of them as they grow up. I would hate to miss out on parts of their lives because I was always having a new baby to take care of. I know that for me, I love my children enough to stay home with them and give up certain material luxuries but I'm not willing to miss out on their lives so I can have as many kids as I can.
Dani - posted on 10/18/2009
I think whenever you and your spouse/partner feel that your family is complete then you've got enough kids. Sometimes I think the Duggars are a little nuts, but then I just remind myself that I wouldn't want people judging me if I chose to have two dozen kids. (But I think my uterus might jump out and run away if I even considered it :p )
As long as you love your kids and can take care of them, I don't see a problem with however many you want.
Stephanie - posted on 10/18/2009
I have 2 a boy and girl and at times I think this is perfect, but I do get the feeling of wanting maybe one more.. Just make sure you can make each child feel loved on a personal level as well as a family.. And make sure you got the fundage! lol
Christy - posted on 10/18/2009
as long as you are able to provide for them and care for them AND have time for them all, have as many as you want. i LOVE large families, i think that brothers and sisters are the best gifts you can give your kids but i do think that its sad when there are so many that you just know there is no way that they are getting enough "mommy time".
Scientifically speaking, the purpose of procreation is to mantain the species. So, logically speaking 2 children is enough, 1 to substitute yourself and partner once you have deceased.
But in my personal opionio, 1 to 2 is enough. The planet is already overpopulated as it is, and only we can make a difference.
Samantha Neil - posted on 10/17/2009
we can afford to have more as im pregent right now with our 3rd :) but he wants one or two more after this 3rd baby im not sure if i will have enough time for them all i dont want anyone to feel left out ..... plus i want us to fit in the car as a family to go for trips .... we have a nice big house and i guess he wants to fill it im a stay at home mom as he works a great job and makes great money so thats not a problem for us. its just there is only so many hrs in a day so im torn what to do .....
Stacie - posted on 10/17/2009
It all depends on you. I have have two children. They are twins. A boy and a girl. My husband and I are not having anymore. In our minds we have the perfect size family. We have two healthy, happy kids and couldn't ask for more. It's all up to you, though. Everyone has different reasons for having or not having more children. Do what's best for you and your family. Who cares what other people think about it. As long as you can provide for them and love each one, then God will continue to bless you with children until you decide not to have anymore.
Shannon - posted on 10/16/2009
Ok, I had a big long answer for this but the long and short of it is it depends on the family. If you can afford multiple kids without getting handouts and you can give them quality time both one on one and as a family then go for it. My personal limit is 3 because I noticed my quality time with each decreased after the 3rd. I could still afford to have one or two more, but I personally refuse to divide the time I spend with each further so I will stop here.
Barbara - posted on 10/16/2009
I have 5 kids and i want more! i know im crazy but i luv being a mom which is funny since i never wanted kids until i got pregnant for the first time. My 2 oldest are my step children, im divorced from the the father of all 5 of them but i kept custody of all of them. I wouldnt trade my life for the world no matter how hard it is somedays. Im only 29 and i hope that ill get married again so i can have more children or amybe just one more.
Bridget - posted on 10/16/2009
That's up to you. I am currently pregnant with my third & believe it or not, people look at me like I have two heads. I thought 3 was a pretty normal number. I will not be having anymore children for a few reasons, I like to never got the hubby to agree to #3, I don't think my poor body could handle another pregnancy and I think 3 is about the most I can have to give them a good balance of attention. I have a friend who has 4 & she said that was her limit so that she could still balance out attention between them. However, it is completely a personal judgement. My cousin felt like she could only focus on one child & she didn't enjoy being pregnant so she only had one. Also, money is a factor. You would not want to bring 6 children into the world if you couldn't provide for their needs.
Kim - posted on 10/16/2009
So long as you are able to provide for them, as many as you want. who is to say that someone should stop having babies just because they already have lets say 8...I mean really as long as you can give them everything they need including your love and time then thats great all the power to you!
Sherry - posted on 10/16/2009
I think it depends on a bunch of variables. First, you have to want to have that amount (LOL), but also you need to have room in your house and vehicle for them too! I am also big into saving $$ for my kids college fund, etc...so I need to know I can afford to provide them with the things I want to provide them. I also work full time, so I do not get more than 4 hours a day with them before they are in bed, so having enough quality time is important.
I have a 2 year old and a 4 month old. We don't think we are done yet!
Tracy - posted on 10/16/2009
when you get to the point where you don't want to have anymore!!! if you can do it, keep your family growing! I think the bigger the better!!! me and my hubby come from big families. I am prego with #4 now. but this will be my last, I know I can't do it again after this one!!!
Emilie - posted on 10/16/2009
I think that depends on you. I have 2 children and would like more. My cousin has only 1 child and isn't having any more. I think it depends on how much you love children and how well you can take care of them.
On the other hand, the woman in AZ or AR or wherever she is from that has 18 kids, I think she does have way to many. They can take care of them but there isn't enough hours in the day to give each of those kids quality time.
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