I have 2 issues.....

Tina - posted on 10/03/2009 ( 13 moms have responded )

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My 3 year old (almost 4 next month) screams at the top of his lungs when he gets mad.....how do I get him to stop doing that??? I have tried just about everything and he only screams louder.



2nd question is ....I am trying to potty train him and he was doing pretty good but now he is peeing in his underwear and wanting to wear pullups again??? What can I do to get him to use the big boy potty???

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Keyana - posted on 10/24/2009

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you could make a game out of it. Try putting some cheerio's in the toliet and tell him to aim for them......make it fun for him not a task

Jennifer - posted on 10/24/2009

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with my three older kids, i would always talk in a soothing voice and pretend that when they were screaming and crying that i couldn't understand them.

"lucas mommy wants to help you but we need you to speak english i dont know what your saying"

they would settle down within a minute then we could talk about what was wrong.

now for the potty training DO NOT USE PULL UPS OR DIAPERS your son is old enough not to use them. my oldest used it as a comfort thing that he was still a baby needing mommy's help.get rid of all of them and get him to help you so he will know that there isn't anymore. then make peeing in the toilet fun fun fun. have a cup of cereal sitting on the back of the toilet ( fruit loops are our fav.) throw a couple in the toilet bowl and tell him to shoot the green one or purple one.you need to get excited for it to work.it worked with my boys

Christy - posted on 10/18/2009

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i use the time out method as well. first, i ask her to stop and tell her that we don't do that. if she doesn't then she has to sit down for a time out and that usually brings on more screaming but they are smart enough to figure out that screaming = timeout and will eventually stop. as for the pullups, i went through the same thing and found it helpful to NOT buy the ones with characters on them...they're just to fun for them or something. and tell him that they are for babies and he is a big boy now....like it's the best thing on earth! :)

Tracie - posted on 10/17/2009

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I agree let him scream, ignore him as much as possible, my 5 year old just started it and ny going about my way he stops then comes to me and tells me whats upset him or whatnot, being the mother of 4 they pray on eachother and the more attention you show the louder they scream, let him be mad and it will pass when he calms down go talk to him but be straight and forward and then its over that simple. It will pass, I promise and potty training you could do 2 ways Give him back the pull-ups period and go back to square one or putting plain jane ones with his underwear over them, reminding him about the potty and high fives and such may work better. 2 of my four went back to being Babies after they were potty trained & this seemed to work for me.

Laura - posted on 10/10/2009

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About the screaming, I would do exactly what he is doing, scream as loud as u can without hurting his ears and maybe throw a little of a fit, like kicking ur legs and throwing ur arms around to show him what it looks like. It worked for my son! As for question #2 I am in the process of just getting mine to even sit on the potty so I have no advice! Sorry. I do hope the advice I did give u was helpful! Good Luck!

Sarah - posted on 10/09/2009

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When my 2 1/2, almost 3 year old, screams and screams...it is usually because he wants my attention or is mad because he doesnt get his way...Ive found, that with him, it is better to ignore it until he stops...just go on about my business until he settles down....saying things to him and trying to calm him down when he's already lost control is worthless! Ive also already been through the potty training stage at 2 and he wanted to start wearing his pull ups probably just because they had cool designs on them...but I would put them out of sight so he would more or less forget about them...I would just try to get real excited about him using the big boy potty again because after he was trained I stopped praising and thats when he would have accidents...although he still has accidents they are fewer and far between! KEEP TRYING! LOL

Kimberly - posted on 10/09/2009

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My 3 year old screams as well. When he does it I put him in time out and tell him we don't scream. If he continues screaming I take a toy away and keep taking them away until he stops. He can not have them back for about half a day or so depending on when they were taken away. Be consistent and do it evey time and he will eventually get the point that it is not okay.

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for the screaming i find to just ignore it and go about your day as you always would helped me and my 2 year old get through that. and for the potty training still doing it myself but i find that the pull ups just confuse him he wants so badly to be a big boy but when he pottys in his underwear i make him put a dipper on for a while until he gets upset about it and then we try it again. not solid on the idea myself but so far it works just fine.

Carla - posted on 10/08/2009

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I would like to recommend that you try reading (or listening if you prefer audiobook) "The Happiest Toddler on the Block" by Harvey Karp M.D.. We are using this method with Alex and it works absolute wonders! We saw an amazing and immediate change in behavior. It really helps stop the screaming, fit-throwing, and crying 95% of the time...of course there are going to be sometimes that the child just needs to vent and get that part out of their system, but hopefully this will be as helpful to you as it is to us!

Tesha - posted on 10/08/2009

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not letting into the screaming will eventually stop him from having those outbursts. I do agree with Erin, having a talk with him after he is done with this tantrum and allowing him to speak his mind, after figure out a way together to let out the frustration but never give in. Kids know how to push buttons and thats what he seems to be doing.



Potty training.. just keep doing what your doing. Dont go back to pull ups or use them. just let him know he cant go potty in his big boy pants and to let you know when he needs to go. Encouragement and rewarding helps young kids except that what they are doing is a good thing. just never scold them badly for having accidents...

Shannon - posted on 10/08/2009

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My daughter went through a screaming phase and if it was just for a not getting her way scream, I ignored her until she quit or the screaming and crying changed and then I pulled her onto my lap and snuggled her. Kind of like a good behavior you get snuggles, bad behavior you get ignored so she only gets attention for good things. It seemed to work. Now we will see if it works on my son since he is starting to do that recently.
For potty training, I know that regressions are not unusual, but I don't know what to suggest.

Kelly - posted on 10/08/2009

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My daughter is four and used to do similar things when she did not get her way. I always told her to do what she has to do and then I would just walk away and go about my day. She also went through a similar thing with the potty training. It just takes time. Don't get pull ups that have cool characters on them for one. We stopped buying princess ones and that helped.

Erin - posted on 10/08/2009

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My daughter is only 16 months and i have no other children so take my advice for what it is worth... but have you tried talking to him about it when he is not upset? Telling him that it is okay to be angry and to tell you he is angry but lets find another way to let that anger out...?

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