Is your child attatched to a comfort object they can

Jenn - posted on 03/20/2011 ( 117 moms have responded )

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Hi, I have a four year old and an 18 month old who both have comfort objects they are SUPER attached too. My four year old son HAS to have a piece of paper to tickle his face with, its strange lol, like a rolled up piece of computer paper...He cannot sleep unless he has this to tickle himself with. He calls it his tickle paper.He is also hooked on his soother...I know I know, he is too old, I hear it everyday, but he is only allowed to use it for bed and we are working on cutting it out completely. It is his comfort item, it makes him feel secure. I am thankful it isn't sucking his thumb, because I cant get rid of that! My daughter needs to have her "ubi" (aka pacifier) stuffed bear, she calls him Teddy, and her blankie. What types of comfort objects do your children need to have for bed, etc. Will you let them use them for comfort as long as they need to or will you take them away at a certain age?

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User - posted on 02/22/2012

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My son is obsessed with the gorilla. He has to have it with him everytime he sleeps or when he is away from his room. When we are forced to wash it he freaks out whining,crying,refusing any other stuffed animal. Its driving us crazy I mean its a rule we have to wash it he drools all over it,puts it in his food its just not sanitary. Does anyone have any advice on how to break him of this habit of absolutely needing the gorilla to function properly he is 16 months old so 1 year 4 months old. its tough on us cause when its being washed he is constantly all over us,refuses to nap,misbahaves and refuses any other toys.

Kelli - posted on 09/13/2011

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My daughter just stopped BF a month ago at age 2 1/2, and the very next day she picked up one of my soft sleep bras and pronounced it her "snuggle bra." We encouraged it at first to help her through the transition, but now she needs it at all times--which can be a little embarrassing, since it's a bra, after all. I don't let her take it anywhere in public--just in the car or at home--but she is constantly holding it and sucking her thumb, and she sleeps with it at night. (Interestingly, she never had a comfort object before this, even though we put little blankies and bears in her bed.) Now I'm wondering if I should get rid of it before she becomes even more attached (it's only been a month at this point). Or is it fine to let this continue until she's ready to abandon it on her own? Ideas?

Melanie - posted on 09/13/2011

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My daughter is 2 years old and is hooked on her blankie. She takes it with her everywhere and even wants to go as far as having it when she's in her chair eating and in the tub. I won't let her have it when she's eating or in the tub, but I keep it in sight so she knows it's still there. She'll grow out of the phase when she is ready to.

Laura - posted on 11/30/2011

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Our daughter loves crocheted blankets. She has two that her Granny made for her and they have been in her cot from the day she was born. She hooks her fingers through it, and sucks her thumb with the blanket under her nose. She goes nowhere without one of them! It has been a blessing, as it has really helped her to settle into being at childcare as she has her security blanket with her. They have told us she becomes upset if she can't see it, which is not always a good thing! I am hoping that she will gradually wean herself away from it during the day when she's older, otherwise I'm not looking forward to having to encourage her to do this! Maybe asking Granny to make her crocheted squares will help as the blankets are huge!

Erin is 15 months old, and we have noticed an attachment to the blankets from around 6 months.

Amber - posted on 03/31/2011

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Hi. I have a 5 year old and a 3 year old. They both have Blankies that they are attached to and they were both also attached to their 'suckies' When my son was about 2 he started really chewing on his suckie. I told him if he did that and it got broken then he had to throw it in the garbage. So every time we caught him chewing on it we would check it and if the silicone part was split he would throw the broken suckie in the garbage.We told him that the store only had suckies for little tiny babies left. It seemed to work because he felt like he was in control of throwing out the broken suckies. My daughter was attached to her suckies longer and it started to affect her language development. so I cut the 'nipple' off of all of the suckies (without her knowing) so she couldn't put them in her mouth. she was sad to find all of her suckies were broken so we found some pretty ribbon and strung all of the suckies on the ribbon and made a suckie necklace. She loved it and it also taught her how to reuse something old into something new! They both still have their blankies and definitely need them to sleep with and if they are tired. My son started school last september and was okay with leaving blankie at home, he was excited to come home each day and tell blankie all about school. My daughter still has her suckie necklace but has lost interest in it like most of her other older toys. I dont think theres anything wrong with them needing a comfort object at bedtime. There are alot of adults that need to have things a certain way to sleep (pillow a certain way, window open, tv on or off) They will figure out what works for them and it may seem wierd sometimes but it always eventually changes

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A bunny plushie. My son HAS to have it or he wont sleep. His Nana brought it back from France when she was visiting (wish she had brought a second cuz Mr.Bun is getting really frayed!)

Mindy - posted on 09/22/2011

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just her thumb and when she sucks her thumb esp when she goes to bed she wants my shirt that ive worn for the day!.....at least she moved past wanting clean underwear to hold lol

Ashley - posted on 09/13/2011

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Both my sons 4 and 15 months have special toys they need to sleep with, my 4 year old has a bear that he has loved to the point it lost an arm and my 15m olds nose (cloth) is soo saturated all the time I have to wash it every few days... but they sleep so much better when their bear and puppy are snuggled beside them that I feel they can hold on to them until they are ready to let go. I had a stuffed rabbit till I was 15 lol and my sister stil has hers but she finally retired it to her closet when her boyfriend complained :)

Katrina - posted on 07/18/2011

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Let them have it as long as they need it. I know several happily married, well adjusted women who still sleep with stuffed animals. I do sometimes.

[deleted account]

My daughter is attached to a blanket, can't sleep without it, takes it everywhere. As long as shes happy she can keep it as long as she wants

Sarah - posted on 07/07/2011

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My 20 month old has absolutely no attachments to anything. Weaned at 11 months, no pacifier, no stuffies, no blankets. I, however, am 31 and still have my stuffy from when I was a toddler. LOL

Sarah - posted on 07/07/2011

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My 20 month old has absolutely no attachments to anything. Weaned at 11 months, no pacifier, no stuffies, no blankets. I, however, am 31 and still have my stuffy from when I was a toddler. LOL

Stifler's - posted on 07/04/2011

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My son has his Elmo and I couldnt' really care less how long he uses it to go to sleep with.

Kandie - posted on 07/03/2011

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My 6 year old and 4 year old both have a white, flannel blanket I made for them when my husband deployed a couple years ago, with a picture of him printed on it; and the each have a variety of stuffed animals to choose from. They aren't particular to any specific one all the time. My 4 year old also has a few other flannel blankets which she likes to sleep with. They both like to have them, but can do without if they are missing.

My 6 year old used a binky at night until she was about 20 months. We just hid them all one day, she fussed for a few minutes that night, and then never again.

My 7 month old takes a binky and nap and bed time, she also has a couple different stuffed animals and blankets that she likes, but she can make do with any blanket or animal.

Jenn - posted on 07/03/2011

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Janet i am sorry but i have never heard of a child being attached to a bottle or dummy or sucking their thumb causing psychological damage as you put it. Those re simply other comfort items as well..Teeth problems maybe but psychological? Not so much.

Jenn - posted on 07/03/2011

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The names children give to their comfort objects are seriously too friggin adorable, who agrees? So presh!

Jenn - posted on 07/03/2011

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ITt is definitly true that they move on to different objects and comforts because my son started as an infant with rubbing his blanky pon his face, then switched to tags, like tags on clothing etc, and he had to rub them and tickle himself with them. My MIL actually made him a blanky with all different tags sewn around the edges, then i went out and bought hi a real tag blanket they are called Taggies (same thing bunch of tags sewn around edges). And then it progressed to troled up paper, but it has to be a certain texture of paper or it "doesn't tickle" as he says, like it has to be like computer paper, cant be too thin or glossy lol. But he has definitly progressed from one to another. My almost 2 yr old daughter eeds her sooby (soother), her "ginky" (blankie but tshe calls it ginky lol) and he little stuffed pink bunny she calls munny lol. I atctually think it is super cute.

Jenn - posted on 07/03/2011

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I hear all these stories of kids quitting the paci or as my kids and i call it the sooby (pronounced sue-bee lol) cold turkey no problem but i tried a million ways and honestly i try to tough it out but three, four days later bedtime is still HELL, and i also have a 1 and half yr old who uses her sooby and he steals hers or screams blody murder, its hard. I tried floating away tied to bunch of balloons, soother fairy, giving it to a baby who needs it more, cutting it, just throwing it out..It is to the point now where i always have spares stashed cuz i go through so damn many and nothing is worse then crawling around the floor trying to find it at 3am with a crying kid in your ear...BUT he only uses it for naps and bedtime so thats not too bad for me. He starts school in September and i am hoping seeing the other kids without one will help him. But that and his tickle paper are the only two things he HAS to have ad i feel bad taking them cuz honestly they really dont bother me and the dentist said his teeth look fine so far..My dentist actually told me to be glad its not his thumb so meh. I swear though i am going to invent a pacifier with a base that yiu sit it on to charge it and if you lose it then you just have to push a button to page it and it will beep and light up...Tell me that isn't a good idea all you moms who lose soothers like i do!! Seriously one day it ill be on store shelves:)

Jenn - posted on 07/03/2011

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Keri- The paper isnt really dangerous because he only will use it if i roll it up or fold it like into a straw and then flatten it if that makes sense, then he rubs the folded smooth part on his cheek or toes or whatever, not the edges, the only exposed edges are at either end and are small and rolled several times so they re thick edges if that makes any sense. lol. He doesn't just hold the paper normal and tickles himself, it HAS to be rolled just so. lol.

Mell - posted on 06/28/2011

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My son was SUPER attached to a big stuffed cat which he called his Mol-Mol he took her everywhere! But she got lost somewhere which was very emotional for him bless! now hes attached to a big brown teddy which he calls brown teddy bear, he dosent take him everywhere now only for bedtimes or when hes feeling poorly, but he sucks his thumb aswell. I wont take it away from him because he loves it so much.

When hes ready and if he wants to he will give up his teddy but im not going to force him to or try and rush him :)

Theresa - posted on 06/24/2011

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My thought is that as they mature try will be able to disconnect. Although, I still have my baby blanket (I'm 37)....lol. BUT, it's packed away. I have a childhood friend that still has her blankie as well. We are educated, very well socialized people who are "successful"! Maybe that's because our mothers didn't try to remove our security. I guess it should depend on the circumstance as well. They can't take things to school (obviously), but hopefully yours will start to be able to separate. My daughter began to separate overnight. Blanket is still a big part of her days, but I find myself reminding her of it. She responds with either "yes, I need it" or "it's ok, blanket can wait for us". Hopefully you will have the same blessing!!

Khali - posted on 06/24/2011

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My son who is 3 has a stuffed monkey blanket type thing (monkmonk) and he's had it since he was born.. He also has a stuffed wolf that when he squeeze's it has a special message from his Dad. My daughter who is 1year old has a blankie (woobiewoo) and it must be present for her to sleep.. Honestly I will let them tell me that they're ready.. No point in causing un-needed heartache. Im sure in some way these items will be with them forever.. but for right now they're right there when I can't always be.

User - posted on 06/24/2011

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My baby known as Chloe has a red kwilt(Blanket). This blanket goes everwhere with us. She wont sleep until I hand it to her. She goes with it to creche as well...she calls it her Soffer.

Tracy - posted on 06/22/2011

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Hi Jenn
My little girl has a comfort blanket, whch she has to take to bed with her, she also wont give me and her dad a cuddle without it when we are at home which we are trying to stop by telling her that we wont to cuddle her and not her blanket. When she goes to bed she also has to have a teddy/fairy and the book that we read before she goes under the cover. I did talk to her about her blankes going this morning and she said "no i wont to keep them" i have always done things when she is ready to do it, like potty training that was done when she was about 1year 6 months and it took 3 days to go throughout the day and when she was just over 2 years she asked to go to bed with her knickers, so i guess i cant really take her blanket if she is not ready.
I feel as a mum you now your child and will do things the way your child likes it to be done
I feel that as a mum you now

[deleted account]

My 6 year old son has to have his blue blanket and stuffed elephant, my 3 year old son has elmo doll can't sleep without it and my 6 month old son has a white blanket and me.

Katie - posted on 05/23/2011

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My two year old sleeps with a stuffed cucumber :) He is obsessed with the show Veggie Tales, and Larry the Cucumber is his favorite character. He had a paci until he was two, but we got rid of it pretty easily. He only uses it when sleeping though, he has never been so attached to anything that he had to have it at all times with him. I think as long as they are able to sleep and sleep well, a stuffed animal or blanket or whatever shouldn't be a bad thing with a time limit.

Tiffany - posted on 05/12/2011

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First off why is he too old? My daughter is 3 1/2 and still sleeps with her "Bunny and Baby." Bunny is a small blankie with a bunny head and Baby is a pink baby seahorse that plays music. She only sleeps with them now as we started working with her on how they need to sleep during the day due to pretty much working hard all night, so they need a rest. When it comes time for bath time for Bunny, she usually helps me put it in the washer herself. That way she knows where it is. If this doesn't work, do a load of colors when your son goes down for a nap or bed time and wash it, dry it then give it back, he should never know it was gone. It takes time to get them to realize that they are going to see them again as soon as they are clean and dry. Go with your gut instinct mom, if he isn't ready just keep trying things, eventually something will click. I wish our daughter stuck to the pacifier, they can be thrown out, she sucks her thumb. By slowly getting her to realize she can go the day without Bunny and Baby, she has stopped sucking her thumb so much during the day. We started out slow, when at home they slept. When we went somewhere in the car they could tag along even into the store, then they started staying in the car. Now they stay home unless on long trips. At home if she was going to lay down on the couch an watch something with us, she could have them, or if she got really upset over something or hurt and needed them for comfort. Now they stay in bed all day and only leave if she is napping in my bed, which is a rarity in and of itself, or during trips she is going to be sleeping in the car. Baby steps is the best way to go if you feel your little guy or girl needs to be weened from something some.

Camille - posted on 04/22/2011

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Hi Jenn, my daughter is 3 years old. She uses a BLANKET aka blanky, it's used when she goes to bed, sad, going on long trips..I mean 'Blanky' is part of the family...as you all have stated, all of these items are for security, there comfort.. and I will NEVER take it from her..when she's ready, I'm positive that she'll always treasure her 'blanky,' but really this is not a big deal..but the paper is a little odd..and he only does it at home..it's a phase..'it to shall pass.' lol.

Kim - posted on 04/05/2011

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I had a problem with my daughter and her pacifier. My aunt suggested that we make a "house" for the pacifier and that it stayed in there except for bed time. After a while we stopped having it for day naps and after a long while night time. We kept the pacifier in the house until she decided it was time the pacifier "moved out of home". Took about six months but it has worked for most of my family and their kids. As for her blankie, it is now just for bed, she doesn't have it at any other time.

Claudia - posted on 04/04/2011

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My three year old daughter still to this day soothes herself by putting her hand down my blouse. Its not just putting her hand inside, she needs to feel skin......boob skin that is. She began doing this when I stopped nursing her a little after a year. I thought she'd get over it by now but thats not the case. She does it when she is tired and ready for a nap or at bedtime. I don't know how to get her to break that little habbit and I feel bad because it soothes her and that is how she falls asleep 80% of the time. She still tries to do that in public but we're getting better at it. She is starting to sleep with 2 or 3 of her many dolls and I think that is helping out a bit (maybe about 3 times a month so far). I'm hoping by the fall she will be COMPLETELY off my boob : D

Teri - posted on 04/04/2011

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My 3yr son has to sleep with his many teddy bears. It started when I got him his first bear on Valentines Day last year and he has been adding to them since.

Amy - posted on 04/03/2011

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My daughter is 18months and has to have her Paci.. I tried cutting it and she just cried. I tried to get her to throw it away and she cried. I tried just not giving it to her and she cried. And when I say cried I mean really cried to the point where I just gave it to her and we will have to try it again when she is older. I always take it from her when she tries to talk or tell her I can not understand her and she removes it. Sometimes she will go without it. She is not allowed to take it in the store she has to leave it in the car. So hopefully she will just wean herself off of it. She also has a winne the pooh blanet (with the winne the pooh head on it) that she sleeps with and we call him "winnie" she loves it as well.

Jackie - posted on 04/03/2011

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Both of my boys have blankies they are 2 and 3 and we take them in the car but not into stores

Jennifer - posted on 04/03/2011

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My daughter has a stuffed elephant that she can not sleep without....she has had it since she was about 1 1/2 (she is now turning 5). She had a binkie till she was 3 and I took it away which to some respect I regret because now she bites her nails. As far as the lovie is concerned she can have it till she goes to college for all I care. Needing a stuffed animal to sleep never hurt anyone :) Good luck :)

Cassie - posted on 04/03/2011

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my 2 year old has to to have her blanket because she uses the tag on it as a comfort. when she is going to sleep she wraps the tag around her finger and with her passie in her mouth she grabs the end of it and thats how she goes to sleep. we are working on getting the passie way at night and just sticking with just the blanket. we will see how that works.

Leanne - posted on 04/03/2011

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my four year old has a blue puppy. he either rubs the tail between two fingers, or puts the tail in his ear, while he sucks his thumb. the good news is that he's slowly weening off it by himself. he really only uses his comfort items when he's trying to sleep, or during a transition.
i believe that he'll whittle his reliance on these items (including his thumb) on his own, with some gentle encouragement. when he's ready, he'll stop sucking his thumb and not need puppy. he's already made some great strides. the paper tickling his face is cute. :) good luck!

Brooke - posted on 04/02/2011

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My daughter is 3 and still has to sleep with her teddy security blanket and pink blanket she's had since she was born. She also still sleeps with a sippy cup at night and freaks out if I do not put milk in it. I'm just grateful it's not a bottle! I know milk is bad for her teeth at night so I am trying to put water in the cup or at least dwindle the amounts of milk!

Leni - posted on 04/01/2011

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Parenting by connection discuss why children have these comfort objects. They also discuss how to eliminate them in a way your child can deal with it affectively. check out 'hand in hand'



My little fella is now 2 yrs 4 months and does not have any pacifiers or toys he is attached to in this way, thanks to this method of parenting.

Connie - posted on 04/01/2011

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My 2 1/2 year old is attached to his 'hanky' (baby face cloths) an his 'bubba' (pacifier). He thakes them everywhere, but will ignore them and put them away when he plays. I'm not worried, when he's ready he'll give them up, but the pacifier will soon just be for sleep.

Dianne - posted on 04/01/2011

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Hi Jenn - how weird is that - my son aged 3 also cannot sleep without tickling his face with a corner of a blanket or pillow case...... He too still sucks a dummy, people comment as he looks 4 - but I will only take it away when he is ready to throw it away himself :)

Cashca - posted on 04/01/2011

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my son is just over two and he loves his blanket he calls it my kie (blankie) he has to have it when he goes to sleep i dont think there is anything worng with it, when he is ready he will give it up in his own time weather it only be when he is ten well so be it like you said it is there security why take that away from them. Im not bothered about what other people say, especially oh but he is to old rubbish each child is different and each parent is different and that didnt happen by chance. if you want your oldest son to give up his pacifier here in south africa we call it a dummy ;) i watched nanny once its an excellent program there was a boy that was about 5 with a pacifier still and she sat him down and made up a story that explained to the little boy that he is a big boy now and that there are new babies getting born and they need the pacifier way more than him and she made a fairy and said to the little boy the fairy is coming to collect the dummies and he eventually gave up his own dummy i reckon you should watch you tube videoes on super nanny and getting rid of pacifiers :) maybe replace it with a teddy anyways my advice would be trust yourself cause you know your kids the best :)

Janet - posted on 03/31/2011

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why are u worried??? l'd let them have it for as long as they need it - my daughter has her 'lamby' and her brother has his 'lamby' which is actually a teddy, they are 5 and 3 - i had my teddy bear until i was 12.........don't stress about it - they will give it up when they are ready - are u embarrassed about it??? don't be. It isn't like they are addicted to the bottle or dummy or their thumb which could cause psychological damage (i don't know why). Some kids don't want to grow up which i think is a good thing..............

Sandy - posted on 03/31/2011

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My daughter has yet to attach herself to a comfort item. I think it's odd, because I had one. Heck, I still have it. ☺ There are days when she wants a particular toy or book, but there's nothing she must have to function.

Alison - posted on 03/31/2011

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My two year old has a stuffed Rabbit that she has had since she was minutes old. She uses it to calm her when she is tired or crying about "something" . It has caused a few concerns as in her mind " Bunny" is real and she tries to feed it her food and talk to it when we are trying to talk with her. She has started Daycare 1 day a week and they are already in the process of trying to get Bunny to stay in her bag unless it is sleeptime. She is getting better. Each morning when she wakes up she leaves bunny in her cot (crib) and knows thats where he stays. I dont mind her having a comfort object however hers was becoming boarderline obsessive. Its about distraction I have learnt. They need to be introduced to other things at the point when they are wanting their object.

Debi - posted on 03/31/2011

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My 5 yr old has a quilt that my Mom sent him. He calls it his "gramma Blanket" and has to take it to bad with him wether to lay down or a bit in the afternoon or at night and he will not go to sleep with out it. I will let him use it for as long as he wants. Since my mom lives @ 10 hrs away, he says its like getting a hug from her.

Angela - posted on 03/31/2011

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Yes...I have a 3 year old who has to play with your ears....especially when its bed time. This goes on all throughout the day. I think children will let go when they are ready. I breast fed so for a while after I stopped breast feeding she would squeeze my breast(I know that may sound alittle weird). Eventually she grew out of that stage(thank God) and thats when the ear thing started.

Becky - posted on 03/31/2011

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It's funny you say that.....my son loves his "circles" to carry around. They started off as pieces from a shape puzzle and now he has moved on to liking poker chips as his "circles". I think its just something to keep his hands busy. He loves to carry them around though. If you give him those during church....he'll sit really quiet the whole hour. LOL! I would probably take them away if this continues for too long but it's just like anything else....he will move on to something else as he gets older. No worries there!

Amy - posted on 03/31/2011

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I replaced my daughter's pacifier with her blanket she has now (she's 3), when she was 5 months old. I will let her out-grow the blanket, cuz technically she will, as it is the size of a washcloth. :) I know someone who is 25 & still has their blanket....

Kristal - posted on 03/31/2011

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My oldest daughter, who is now 5, went through a tough time adjusting when we moved away from my parents when she was 2 1/2 years old and clung to her green care bear, easy to say though that when she was 3 1/2 she let go of the bear and i was actually the one who was more upset, my youngest who is 2 needs a blanket no matter where we go or for how long we are gone, she is more partial to ones my sister has made for her. My mom once told me that she held on to the bottle till she was 5! it's really whatever your kids are comfortable with and what you are willing to deal with :)

Crystal - posted on 03/31/2011

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The only thing my oldest son has to have to is a batman of some sort item in bed with him.. my youngest doesn't have anything for comfort but then again he is only 1yr old so i don't expect him to. But other than that they don't have anything. As for allowing him to have it as long as they need I don't think so I think I would take it away things by a certain age if he hadn't already out grown it. perhaps if its just a teddy bear then no keep as long as they need to yes its a hard situation its all about each childs personality really

Rena - posted on 03/31/2011

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My daughter has her "puppy" it's one of those little blankets with a puppy head. She used to have a binkie (pacifier) but we slowly got rid of it before she turned 2. She isn't as attached to "puppy" as she used to be, so I assume eventually she'll give it up on her own.

Marilyn - posted on 03/31/2011

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My son is almost 3 and have nver really taken a pacifier but he relies on his blanky which he calls a (T). He sucks on one corner and rubs another on his nose. His dad has talked about taking it away cold turkey. I just dont think there is any mjaor harm in a child have some sense of securlty when he goes to sleep. I think that by the time hits the BIG school not preschool he should be able to let it go or you should ween him off of it.

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