OMG! How do i get my toddler to go to bed. Going crazy.

Jenny - posted on 07/15/2010 ( 13 moms have responded )

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I am going crazy with the bedtime battles. I dont know what to do. Sometimes i will be ncie about it and lay next to him and stroke his head but he mostly will try to stall and keeps fighting bedtime. If i step out of sight , he screams bloody murder. What to i do?!!!!!



- Desperate MOM

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Megan - posted on 07/12/2011

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It will be difficult however the best thing is to start a bedtime routine and you should let your child know ahead of time what you expect and then stick to it if they sense you wavering it will never work you may have a few nights of bloody murder screamin gbut in the long run it will be totally worth it. Start like an hour before and do bath time then move to books with mom or dad in the childs room/bed and make sure you let them know ahead of time how many books you will read. my daughter and i do two books she gets to choose one and i choose one if she has an earlier bath we read more books. And then tuck them in and dont play the games.

Nicole - posted on 07/11/2011

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One thing you may try is a "nightime bell" my friend does this with hers and she has an alarm that goes off and signals time to start the bed time routine.

Lizan - posted on 07/24/2010

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This nutritionist I saw when I was pregnant with my first with gestational diabetes told me to get this book called 'The Baby Whisperer' and it saved my life. My son has been sleeping at least 10-12 hours a night since he was 3 months old and if I don't get any sleep, or enough sleep, I have no one to blame but myself. He did go through a period of 1-2 months when he was 13-16mths old where he woke up with what they call night frights... but has been an angel ever since. Routine is the key. When they are toddlers, they can scream bloody murder and they will because they know you'll respond to it. My son sleeps in his own room, and every night I bath him, play a bit and around 9pm put him to sleep, with the same CD. When or if he wakes screaming, or screams when I leave the room, I go in, if he's standing lie him back down and reassure him it's okay, I don't hang around for more than 1-2 minutes and I leave. I wait 10 minutes and do it again (he will scream bloody murder)... usually after 5-6 times, he is so tired he eventually goes to sleep. He learns that even if i come in, i'm boring, I don't play and don't stay for very long, so he gets bored too. After 1-2 nights of this, he usually is back to his normal routine. Not sure if this will work on your boy, but routine is the key and you need to be brave when he screams and not go in until the 10 minutes is up. If you're feeling weak, you can wait 7 minutes first, then 10 minutes... and so on. They do eventually stop because they get tired, just don't get them up again whatever you do because that will be the end of it.

Kayla - posted on 07/18/2010

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my daughter did the same thing. we had bed routine, but still she wouldn't want to go to bed she would cry and cry. i would cave in and go get her and lay with her. but then i decided to let her cry it out. the first couple night i thought it would never end, but then she fell asleep and we haven't had a problem since. keep the routine and let him cry. also he might not like the dark or needs noise. my daughter listens to music and has a night light.



i know it makes you feel terriable, but he needs to learn, to go to sleep on his own.

Valory - posted on 07/17/2010

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I agree with the posts, it could also be the naps, to late in the day, too long, too short. These need to be as consistent as the bed time and routine. (I'm speaking from experience too )Give him a '5 min' warning that bed time is coming, this seems to work at times. Our son is 2 and a half and sometime he does good and others screams at us. Your child is approaching the terrible 2's and this in itself could be the reason. He may be teething, baby advil is the best for teething (7 kids to testify lol) and lasts the longest. I agree with Betty Warren too. It is difficult for a child to adjust from being put to sleep with mommy or daddy right there to being put in their bed and they go out the door. We started that with our son about 6 months ago, at first he was not happy with it but is adjusting. Sometimes we lay with him in our bed when he has had a bad day but for the most part he is going to sleep in his bed without us. It is not 'nice' or 'unkind' if you lay with him or not, You are a good mom no matter what the particular night routine is. He is growing up and his body is adjusting, this is a difficult transition for children (first of many) but I think you will do fine. See if dad will take turns with you putting him to bed, this helps, him and you. Let the crying go no longer than 15-20 min, usually that long means he may be hurting or just had a really bad day. Go console him, try to see if he will lay down, tell him if he keeps goofing you will put him in his bed, then follow through. It will take a little while but he will get used to it as long as you stick to your guns. This is mega button pushing-what-can-I-get-away-with phase but I think just asking other moms advice is a great step. Keep us posted

Betty - posted on 07/17/2010

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ur doing it right it sounds like he is just testing u with his attention span getting longer he is going to try new twists to old routines if u stick to it he will get the pic and if u really need to have someone come over and set with u if u have that available to distract u from having to set and just listen to him cry i think we all know how that feels

Megan - posted on 07/16/2010

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I know it can be heart breaking but i just had to stick that out and now my daughter will even go to bed for my husband.

Jeneva - posted on 07/15/2010

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What time does he get up for the day? He may need an earlier bedtime. I find that when my kids go to bed late, they fight it a lot more.

Jenny - posted on 07/15/2010

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He is 20 months now. I do the routine thing. He was doing good for awhile but then went back to tantrums and crying when it was bedtime. I would give him a bath, play quietly for 20 minutes then read a few books then put him down around 8:15- 8:30 pm. I usually let him cry it out but lately his cries have gotten much more intense . its makes me feel horrible . :(

Megan - posted on 07/15/2010

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I find the best thing with my daughter is routine. We do bath time 2 stories then climb in bed and its time to sleep. Although it can be very hard at first you have to let them cry it out whatever you do don't go back in the room when he starts screaming. My husband used to do that and he couldn't put her to bed for a long time because if he put her to bed she would scream and if i went in she knew i meant business and would go right to sleep. However these are thing that you could implement not really a fast fix.

Betty - posted on 07/15/2010

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well for starters how old is the lo there could be a thousand different reasons he is having trouble and it could be as simple as laying him down too early and then do you have a bedtime routine in place children crave structure and it is not easy to start one they will transition from one activity to the next when they know whats expected of them and later they will have less tantrums and acting out OK i know i sound like an expert but i only know cause i'm am currently doing this with my 5 year old i waited too long but it is getting better now that i know where i went wrong

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