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People trying to give things to your toddler

Cori - posted on 06/18/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Does anyone else have a problem with strangers trying to give little toys or candy to your toddler? How do you handle it?

My son just turned 2 and ever since he was 1, we've had people that want to give him little things when we are out. Usually it is at a restaurant or store. The waitress or check-out person will try to give him some little toy that they found. I had the maintenance guy at our apartment give my son a old McDonald toy one day. The man was clearly out picking up trash and he gave my 2 year old a scratched up McD toy?! It really bothers me. I know he looks older than his age because of his height and how well he talks but, even if he seems to be 3 or 4, giving a young child a used toy that could have been anywhere with their mom's permission is just plain gross. I don't want to be rude, so usually I just smile, have my son say "thank you", trade him out for one of his own toys when they aren't looking, and throw the toy away. (Always cheap trinket toys. If I thought it was a nicer toy, I'd keep it and sanitize it later.) I know they mean well, but it is just gross and disrespectful. Pull me, THE MOM, aside and ask before handing my toddler anything.

Candy also bugs me. I hate suckers. I can handle them if we are going to be somewhere for a while but I don't want my son bringing one into the car. It is a choking hazard and he always ends up a nasty mess. But I've had a few waitresses hand one to him without asking first and I even had a hair dresser that gave him one after I asked her not to. She asked if he wanted a sucker and I said, "Oh, no thank you. I don't really want it in the car but thanks anyways." She said, "Just lighten up mom and let him hold it" and handed it to him with the wrapper on. Seriously?! What toddler is "just going to hold" a sucker and not want it opened that second. I will not being going back to her.

Thanks fellow toddler moms for letting this hormonal pregnant lady rant a bit. I'm curious to see if anyone else has a problem with this too.

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5 Comments

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Amber - posted on 06/20/2011

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I agree with Jennifer. Get rude. Let people think you are. I am CONSTANTLY telling people that my two year old son can't have whatever it is they're giving him. Especially candy. I just tell people that he is not allowed candy. Period. If they beg, I just walk away, or I get even ruder and I push their hands away. Which, in turn upsets my son, but as soon as that person is out of sight, he forgets. Now, I'm not saying to reject everything. My son may be two, but he's the world's biggest flirt. Seriously. We go to McDonald's and he flirts his way into the heart of EVERY woman who works there and I'm fairly certain we have every toddler toy they've EVER made. Granted, we get those toys from the store and straight outta the bag and not from the trash. But, I'm pretty rude about candy. I don't let ANYBODY give him anything without MY permission. If they try to bypass me and go to his father, I get mean and remind them that I'm his mother and I need to be the one they speak to first. He's your son, not theirs. They can't tell you what's right and what's wrong and if they beg, just ignore them and walk away. If they're adults, they need to act like it. And as for your hair dresser, I'd have handed that sucker right back and even refused to pay for her disrespect. You just can't let people do what they want when it comes to raising YOUR child.

Jennifer - posted on 06/19/2011

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Let them think you're rude. They're strangers and they are the rude ones for handing things to your child without your say so. I'm mean enough that I have taken things back from my daughter and handed them back to the adult and told them she didn't need whatever it was then. Most of the people I encounter as first though and, especially with the candy, I just tell no, I try not to give her too much sugar, she has enough energy all on her own! It usually gets a laugh and they walk off but I have no problem being rude when it comes to my child lol.

Brianna - posted on 06/19/2011

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I hate it to! Everytime i go to shopping someones try to give my 19 month old a sucker! shes soo not old enough to eat a sucker unless i hold it and she licks being careful that she does bite it and choke.. i just think im trying to shop i dont need to be worrying about try to feed my kid candy at the same time! and i HATE it when people r like come on mom just let her have it come on, come on! like really they sound like children winning like that.. So now i usually say ok then i walk way saying ill give it to her later but i just throw it out.. its easier then listening to other adults beg me to give MY daughter candy

Cori - posted on 06/18/2011

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Usually I let him have the candy but the hair stylist made me really mad. I bring a snack for him when he gets his hair cut. I usually give him little bites while he is getting it cut. It keeps him happy and not nasty sticky. She was one of those really loud abrasive ladies and all I could picture was my toddler getting his freshly cut hair bits all over sucker drool...which he did because she handed it to him after I said no.

Gladys - posted on 06/18/2011

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All I can say, is i totally agree. I have 3yo girl twins and it drives me crazy, people usually want to give them candy, and when they ask i say yah cus i don't want to come off as being rude, i rember one time saying no, and i think the lady felt like i was being rude to her. But i understand completly where your coming frm

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