Sanity as a stay at home mom

Lisa - posted on 07/18/2011 ( 14 moms have responded )

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Don't get me wrong I looooooooovvvvvvvveeeeeeee being a mom!! I love every minute of being with my children.But at the same time I don't go out much, don't have many friends nowadays, and really don't do anything...I go to church sometimes but I still don't make friends :( What do you do to keep your sanity???

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Jennifer - posted on 07/31/2011

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First I joined our local Y. I got a chance to exercise and blow off stress and have met an amazing group of moms in the process! It was expensive, so I work there for just one hour a week (teaching mommy and me swimming). My kids stay in the babysitting room while I teach and I get a free membership. I also just joined a moms club after being convinced by some of the moms in my daughters preschool. We do some fun things together too. My husband works long hours, six or seven days a week, so I don't ask him to watch the kids ever for girls night out, but my mom and mil will help every once in a while.

LaQuitea - posted on 07/26/2011

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I have a almost 3 1/2 year old, an 18 month old, and baby #3 is 3 days past due! I had to master balance very quickly. My saving grace was when I found www.meetup.com. I joined a moms group in my area and it has been awesome! We have all kinds of events. There are things for moms to do with the kids, mom only events, couples only events, and family events. If you can't find a group in your area: start one!!!

Cartnee - posted on 07/25/2011

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At first, staying home felt like a prison for me. I loved the time with my kids but would beg my husband to even just go to the grocery store with me on the weekends to get out. Funny how things change as your kids grow. Once they were out of the infant stage, I got out more on my own. I rediscovered my love of reading. I have a group of friends which I try to get together with for girls night once a month. Most importantly, I made a great friend who is off of work once a week and we are able to have girl time. I am also very lucky to have a mil who will watch my boys whenever I need. All these reasons have had me considering a third baby. Just know that everything is a phase. Your kids will get more self efficient and you won't feel like it is such an undertaking to leave to house for a few hours with them. Also, find a hobby that you love to pass the time when your kids are playing or sleeping.

Hope that was helpful.

Danielle - posted on 07/22/2011

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Once a month mandatory I have a deal with my husband that he has to feed the kids dinner, bathe them and put them to bed and my friends and I have dinner and movie night out. Once a week I ask him to watch the kids for three hours and I go to a coffee shop to read quietly or wander the mall or just relax away from the kids. Sometimes you need a break, and these few times away from the kids are good for me and not too long or often so the kids can deal too. Really does make a difference.

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Charm - posted on 07/31/2011

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I used to work in the summer part time and that would be my grown up time away from my kids, but it was not worth it to me. Yes my kids drive my insane alot of times. Hunny and I make sure that we do go uot and spend time together. Getting involved at church is also a great thing, not just going to church but to participate in womens study group, or going to womens seminars at church. Doing my nails, blow drying my hair and taking sometime for myself helps me alot. Putting your kids on a schedule will be your bestfriend. When my kids take their nap is when I take a little time for myself after my oldest and I are done homeschooling.The book preparation for parenting by ezzo is a great book to read, remembering the the kids are coming into your world and not you to them, and also teaching you how to put them on a schedule are some of the things mentioned in this book. I read my bible and pray for strength, and patience all the time but didnt think of the part that for me to be more patient, I will be tested.

Kristy - posted on 07/26/2011

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I am mom of three. My oldest will be 5 in a few days, my daughter just turned three and I have a four month old baby boy. My oldest is also Autistic so it makes going out to do things like going to the park difficult. I often feel that I ma trapped and going to loose my mind if I don't get some sort of adult interaction. Currently I am taking the older two to swim lessons for an hour everyday. But when I'm stuck at home sometimes I have to reach out through the internet. I have Facebook that I can hop on and see what is going on in the lives of my friends, occasionally have a chat. I'm also on a couple of blog sites for a couple of TV shows that I like to watch after the kids have gone to bed. I try to limit my computer time to when the kids are playing, watching one of their preschool TV shows, or sleeping. Other than that if there is a chance to get out of the house I jump on it. If I need to go to the grocery store or get diapers for the baby, I will take the kids with me. Most of the time I do my running around while my oldest is at school. Since he will be starting Kindergarten this year and my daughter going to preschool, it will be just me and the baby for a few hours every day so I might try getting out my sewing machine again and catching up on a few projects.

Christine - posted on 07/26/2011

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i need to find something im going nuts .i have 2 kids a 9 year old and a almost 5 year old i cant work due to disability i need to find something to do or ill gonna pull my hair out.i have no friends to talk to or text any answeres please let me know

Christine - posted on 07/26/2011

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i am exactly the same as you but dont have friends .no one to call or text no one visits i understand totally/.my husband goes out to work 8-12 hours a day im home everyday .the kids dont go to him for nothing .and ive had it .sooooooooooooooo i totally understand

Carika - posted on 07/26/2011

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Jenessa, I agree with every thing you say! I just 'reached' out to one of my friends who were kind of distant recently. On Monday we organised a helper to look after our babies while our older girls were in school & we went exercising! WONDERFULL!!!!! I've found that sometimes you just have to come out of your comfert zone & 'DO IT"!! (Not so easy in our little town). But suddenly I have some courage - and I am sertan that this came from God for I prayed specificly! So - very greatfull!!

Janessa - posted on 07/25/2011

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Reach out. I have church and that's almost everyone in our neighborhood, so it is easy for me to do, but if you know of anyone with kids your age reach out to them, if you don't find somebody, start playgroups. You do need adult conversation. I have to say I worked when my 1st 2 were born and my husband stayed at home while he finished school, and I am so much happier being at home, but I do need adult conversation to keep my sanity. I never want to go back to work, but that doesn't mean this is easy. I think it is hard for everyone to reach out, but that doesn't mean they don't want to, so just go ahead and do it, at church or wherever. They'll be happy you did it. Also take your kids to things like the library, even the grocery store, it can help break up your day a little. Hope that helps.

Carika - posted on 07/20/2011

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I'm also searching for this answer.... Thanx for replies, but what if you are in small town with no groups? Do you think I can start one? Does moms realy commit to these kind of catherings?

Ursula - posted on 07/19/2011

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Hi. I'm a stay home mom too.
Have you tried to look up in your church's flyer, local paper, or city's website, for groups of moms that have the kids the same age as yours? There are groups of moms that get together at the park or at each other's house once a week or twice a week sometimes. The kids play together and the moms cook, bake, talk, do their nails, etc... They usually hire two sitters (depending on the number of kids) and everyone pitches in to pay them. It's not expensive, maybe 20 bucks per mom (assuming there are 7-8 moms and the "party" lasts 4-5 hours.
You can get to meet other moms, share your thoughts, experiences, etc... and you get to have some "grown up time".
It's a great way for the dads to meet too. =)
Hope this helps.
Ursula

Kelina - posted on 07/18/2011

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to become part of a church community you often have to go every week. i am part of a mom's group that meets once a week and i'm going back to school in september to get some grownup time. i love being a mom but somedays my kids drive me insane!

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