To do daycare or not to do daycare? That is the question.

Renae - posted on 03/04/2011

I have a 2 year old. I work 3 days per week. My mum has him one day and he goes to family day care (day care in someones private home) 2 days per week. My baby loves daycare. He has so much fun there. He has always had a lot of interaction with other kids, I used to babysit other kids his age from playgroup a couple days a week and I have always noticed how much more they learn from each other than from us. An adult can show a toddler something 100 times but as soon as they see another toddler do it, they get it straight away. To be honest if my daycare lady had an extra spot he would probably be going there 3 days a week and not to my mum. Yes mum loves him and he loves her, but mum does things her way, sometimes disagrees with me etc etc. And I dont have to put up with having those conversations with the carer - she does what I say and thats that. She is excellent with him and all the kids love her and I totally trust her. In a nut shell, there are pros and cons to both, but I dont think that going to family is always necessarily better than care, and at care they will get the stimulation and learning opportunities they need which they may or may not be getting with family.

Amanda - posted on 03/04/2011

When my son was 13 months old, I decided he needed to go to daycare. I took him for about a month, part-time, and he HATED it! He is an only child, and I am a SAHM. At that time, daycare just wasn't right for him. However, my husband and I would love to have another child. I see my son attending daycare once we do-for everyone's sake. I guess you just have to go with your gut and do what feels right for you and your daughters! Best of luck!

Marcy - posted on 03/04/2011

At this point I would hold off and then enroll them in a pre-school type environment so that they don't have to make another change from daycare to pre-school. if you feel that they need more interaction with other kids why not check and see if there are a few groups that perhaps your mom could take them to during the week for social reasons. My son was in daycare from 3 months to 2 1/2 years old then he went to a nursery school that is in the same building as the pre-school and kindergarten. The adjustment was hard from daycare to nursery but he did fairly well. I just think that if you enroll them in daycare and then have to pull them out less than a year later for -re-school you may encounter more transition issues. Good luck.

Carisa - posted on 03/04/2011

It sounds like you are looking at daycare more as a preschool type thing rather than actual daycare. I put my daughter in preschool at 3 1/2 and it work really well for us. My sister's daughter is very active, and she put her in preschool/daycare at 2. If you think they would benefit from the time with other kids, there is nothing wrong with that. Maybe you could just put them in two days a week.

Marisa - posted on 03/04/2011

I would wait. 2 year olds I believe attach to people and need lots of life experience. With your mom they sound like they are interacting in the world more. She takes them out to groups, prob to parks. If they are in a home day care, then they have the same environment day in and day out. Young children learn by being exposed to lots of things. Also when they are tired and need a lap your mom is there. Not at day care. Even if they tell you that because there are other children to tend to. I am not totally opposed to child care, but think that later is earlier than later. My daughter (25 months) just started 2 days a week at a center not by my choice. We are both adjusting, but I could not imagine caging her up like that 5 days a week. And this is a very expensive well equipped center. Also kids at 2 - 3 don't play with other kids often. It is normal development to play along side. My son started a little after 3 and was really ready for it. I agree with what one other wrote. A center is not what is best for you child. Read basically any child development book. Unless you mom is having them watch TV 6 hours a day or wants to be done watching them then I would challenge you to think if you are putting them into care to make your self feel better or your kids. Lastly, kids are all going to learn the abc's and numbers and shapes, and doing so at 3 does not lead to a brighter child. High SAT scores are good grades are directly related to a child being read to everyday. Really lastly...My son's preschool is great and does El Reggio teaching. There is no formal sit down teaching of ABCs or numbers. Some kids are interested and they provide activities for it and they pick it up. They are not the norm. Why on earth does a 3 year old need to know that information? Good luck on your decision.

Dora - posted on 03/04/2011

I was one of those moms that thought any mother who would put their child in daycare was horrible for doing so. Well talk about me being a hypocrite. At 15 months I felt my son needed socialization skills so I searched around and found a daycare around the corner from my home. I went for several surprise visits and was impressed with what I found. I also loved the fact that they had certified teachers in certain classes and followed state curriculums. My son will be 3 in May. He knows his ABC's, 123's, shapes (not just circles and squares but trapezoid, octagon, diamonds, etc...), he knows how to spell his first name and he identifies the letters of the alphabet and can tell you what word uses that letter. He is in a structured classroom which I love because that is how I was with him at home. They have a daily schedule that they follow: circle time, snack times, breakfast time, lunch time, play time, art class, music class, nap time, reading time, ect.... I can't say enough good things about daycare. I LOVE IT! My son has little friends now and is doing great. It takes me approx. 20 minutes a day just to get him out of there. I say give it a shot and see how it goes. If you or your children are not happy about it, you can always pull them out. My husband and I are now in a financial position where I can stay home as we are having cutie pie #2. Our son is going to continue with his daycare part-time and begin with their pre-school program. At this point I could not imagine ripping him out of the environment he loves so much.I mean everyday I pick him up he tells me about his day, which friends he played with, what crafts he did, etc.........

Tammy - posted on 03/04/2011

I think it depends on the daycare..the people who run it...is it clean..loving..safe..kids your kids age..healthy meals provided..reasonably priced for what they provide?? Can you picture you children playing/being there for whatever hours needed? What type of activities..interaction with all the kids do they have..is it kid friendly/kid proof? I worked in a daycare center that had upto 14 kids age 0 to 12yrs of age there was something for each of them to do everyday...summer time was special we did outings for school age kids outside the center age appropriate and safley with 3 to 4 staff depending on amount of kids and activity we did!! We also did trips to the park close by with all ages especially for the little ones...we went on walks..celebrated holidays per parents permissions....it was chaotic yet fun all at once and we were like a big family actually..the kids loved it as did we(staff)!! I now have a small home based daycare..one of them being my 6 month old granddaughter which I love getting so close to!! It really depends on your needs and you childrens needs! I do reading, crafts, meals etc in my home and the kids seem to really love it! So...if its a small daycare or fairly good sized one...do all the background checks...ask questions..ask around to find what fits your families needs...take the kids by one day as you just sit quietly and observe the whole place, kids, staff, etc see what you think of it..what the kids think..go from there...use your gut feelings plus other resources to do research on daycares in your area, price range etc...good luck..hope you find what your looking for!!

Candice - posted on 03/04/2011

my daughter's been in home-care since she wsa 7 months old. I think she learns alot there, but that could just be my daycare provider. If there are older kids there (even slightly older) you'll find your children will learn from the older kids...which is good and bad (good for cognitive and social reasons, bad if the kids teach bad behaviour).

Elfrieda - posted on 03/03/2011

I don't think that daycare is necessary for healthy development of children. I think it's something that's necessary for some situations, and has its own benefits, but is not "the best thing". If you want to put them in daycare to take the burden off your mom, that's great. I'm sure you chose a good one. But I don't think you're depriving them if you don't "socialize" them until kindergarten.

Teresa - posted on 03/03/2011

I'm, personally, against daycare.

That being said.... I was a SAHM and w/ my twins pretty much 24/7. We went to playgroups several times a week and I put them in preschool 5 hours/day, 5 days/week 2 months after they turned 3. They loved it!!

Christy - posted on 03/03/2011

Can you put them in part time, 2 or 3 days a week? I used to take my son to an at home daycare 3 days a week and that saved us a little money, and he got the interaction with other kids. Then I had my second and I stopped work (they are a yr apart). I think 3 is a good age to put them in daycare, BTW if you have a choice. Sometimes you can put down a deposit to hold the place for you until your kids get a little older-but not for too long.



Also you can look into mother's day out programs at local churches. They are usually only 2 days a week for 4 or 5 hours at a time. That is what my 2 1/2 yr old is in now. My son is in Pre K (he's 3 1/2) with the local school district (he was accepted for speech delays) That is free for us which is awesome.

Shanee - posted on 03/03/2011

I understand the economical side of it and the social side of it all too well. My 3 year old has been around other children since he was born because I work in the schools in our area doing music and they've allowed me to bring him with me and I did that with him for about 2 years. So he was always around children and it was saving me money as well, however I wanted him to be around children his own age. So with our childcare we chose, we pay monthly but we can always help out with different tasks needed for the childcare site which lessens our monthly payment..maybe you can make a deal like that or find a co-op

Sarah - posted on 03/03/2011

Thanks for your response Amanda, it gave me a little more confidence in my decision. I shall let you ladies know how this goes! Ah to always wonder if you are doing the right thing for your children!

Amanda - posted on 03/03/2011

My daughter is almost 3 now. I was having the same conversation with my family back in November. Now my daughter goes to daycare and she loves it. Her communication is better, she shares better, and it taught her how to express herself with out having tantrums. I had the choice to do part time but I want her to get use to it so when she starts preschool she is already use to it.

Sarah - posted on 03/03/2011

I would not be able to put them in part-time. I would still have them go to their dads on Fridays all day and then part of the morning on Mondays so they will still have that. My mom does take them to play groups but I think it is different when they are in daycare and it is a daily thing. Even when they are in the play groups, they don't play with other kids and tend to separate themselves. I think I am going to give it a try and if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.

Jennifer - posted on 03/02/2011

A couple of thoughts. 1, try daycare 1 or 2 days a week. 2. they can start preschool at 3 so you don't have long to wait for that. 3. Have playdates when you can. Take them to local playspaces, example recreation centers have indoor playgrounds for this age group or maybe could give you ideas. As should daycare centers. Or even head to a Mc Donalds Playspace. Have a smoothie and in time your sure to meet new friends there. Hope that helps. :)

Michelle - posted on 03/02/2011

Are you able to do the child care a couple of days a week? It would give your family a break as well as get them interacting with other children. You then slowly ease them into it rather than just all of a sudden they are going there instead of to Grandma's or Dad's.