Why does my baby love her father more?

Greta - posted on 07/15/2011

Moms are often given the task of rule maker. Dad's are often the human entertainment center. If you want your child to find you interesting, make their life interesting. Often only dads possess the strength to pick them up twirling them, spin them, place them on their shoulders, etc., this can be hard for many moms, if you aren't physically able to lift them or you can't find the time to develop that sort of strength, find ways to give them the physical stimulation they desire. Also, dads often don't mind getting down on the ground (at eye level) and down to serious horse play; this demonstrates your interest level to your child. And really, isn't that what it's all about, how much you let them know their relevance to you. Your activities with them should be child centered. Meaning, let them decide what it is they want to do, you just try to facilitate their activities; let them guide you, so that you can guide them (within reasons of safety, etc). When you try to force kids to play something you think is fun or educational, it's bound to fail; it doesn't mean you don't make those activities available to, but don't force the issue. Listen to them and watch their body language, they'll let you know what's interesting (it's often the seemingly trivial thing that they want to play with). Don't spend your time with your child saying "no." One parent usually ends up with this role of enforcer. Find a way to share this role equally so that the child see you both as accommodating and as a rule enforcer. And when you do say no, make it quick and without any emotional input (it's often as easy as taking something away from them) and when they moan or cry in protest, ignore it completely. Kids at that age will not understand adult complex reasoning; they're simply trying to get what they want. In fact if you find yourself saying "no" often, ask yourself why that is. Is it because you haven't safety proofed your home? If it's not causing a safety hazard ask yourself if you really need to make it an issue... pick your battles, it'll pay off down the road. Lastly, it's not about love. Kids at this age don't understand those sorts of complex human emotions; at least not in the same way an adult would. They just want a daily adventure. If you make life interesting for them, they will want to be with you. Dont' forget dad's can be goofy, they'll dance and act the fool for your child... like the farmer in the movie "Babe", sometimes you need to dance for them... they like that. And by the way, you should be having fun too, because they know when you're faking it.

Lydia - posted on 09/12/2009

Hey that the same concern my husband has with my son. Since he adores his mama.If your concern she might be jealous, try some girl time with your daughter. Having a tea party, playing dress-up. My husband has guys time with Ian. They go to the park and the beach he loves it.

Jade - posted on 09/11/2009

All girls adore their fathers i know my 2 year old does, but she does see slightly less of him themn me. he works all week and i work 2 days a week,. so when he gets home she only wants her daddy!

Rachael - posted on 09/10/2009

She is too young to differentiate favorites like that. Dont let it upset you. I used to think that about my son when he was a baby. She loves you very much.

Talin - posted on 09/09/2009

I know how you feel you when my 1 year old see's his dad its like I am not even there.

I think its because 1 parent is the rule setter on the other is the one that just goes with everything they do that like that parent better. In you case girls are more drawn to their dads dont feel bad I know it hurts but she will grow out of it all in good time keep us posted.

Barbara - posted on 09/09/2009

I have 6 kids and all 6 of them did the same thing from about age 2 to 4 or 5. IT's a phase they go through. Mommy sort of disappears in the importance factor, then comes back. Don't take it personally. Infact, in this part of their developmental stage it's important that Daddy is part of their world. We (as mothers) get the first two years to hold and cuddle. My husband describes this time as the "blob" phase - go ahead laugh, I do, then the children become more interesting to them because they're able to do more. You still have that bond with your children, It's time for Dad to develop his bond more with them. It will turn around and become more balanced after about 5 yrs of age. You're still important to them ( does she still come to you when she has a boo-boo?). Encourage her time with Dad (maybe even breakfast dates with her), and if you desire that one-on-one time, have a daughter and mom time too, Hope this helps.

Erin - posted on 09/09/2009

We are all women here, I'm sure if your father was a part of your childhood at one time you were likely daddy's little girl... But you know momma always holds a special place in your heart! Now as grown ups my dad has a cow that nobody ever calls him but we ALL keep in touch w/mom! (parents divorced) I agree w/the other moms that daddy gets the good end, all they do is play and be merry... Momma sticks to the rules, etc... When she wants to be girly she'll be needing momma back! Dad's aren't soo good @ the girly stuff! But they seem to treat their little girls like princesses and who doesn't love that? Beware when she hits teens you'll both be on the sh!t list so to speak! :) Ah the phases our children will go through... GOOD LUCK!

Lisette - posted on 09/09/2009

Dont worry I have a 4 year old and my daughter at that age did the same thing now she four and she mommy little girl now she wants to be with me everytime. I felt the same way but I always heard the saying daddy liitle girl, so I thought it will never change but it did so just be patience and give her mommy love

Megan - posted on 09/09/2009

My son loves his daddy more its just not far all the thing we do for them and all the men do is play time and barth times well thats wat mine does lol

Renee - posted on 09/08/2009

Hi Sinazo, my daughter also showed similar "preference" and it would make me really upset. After the birth of my second, I actually became depressed about the situation with my first and saw a psychologist to help me sort out the inadequate feelings I was having. He assured me that is an actual psychological stage that children should go through with their mothers. It is completely normal and that one day she would "come back" if you will. Sure enough she did! By three she started showing a more intense need for me. So weird. These stages definitely play with your mind as a parent. Good luck! and hang in there! The hardest part I think is to not take it personally and to think that it is something you have done. I agree with the other ladies about us being the ones to set routines, etc. I also now agree that they (the children) are tougher on the ones they trust and who are around the most.

Sinazo - posted on 09/08/2009

Nichola thankx man...... jst thinking about it I think I am the big bad wolf in my home too.The funny thing is even when her dad stops her from something she till goes back to him with sorry written allover her face bt with me that's another story for another day but I guess its life and i'm not alone

Nichola - posted on 09/08/2009

my 2 year old daughter is exactly the same so i kno how u feel..i think all little girls tend 2 b daddys girls i also have 2 sons which they r more around me than ther daddy..but it hurts wen my daughter plays me up and is good 4 her daddy..dont let yourself get upset over it im sure ur little girl loves u just as much as she loves her daddy i find 2 with my daughter its because my partner gives her watever she crys 4 and lets her away wif anything and i seem the big bad wolf 4 not lettin her away wif things..take care xx

Sinazo - posted on 09/07/2009

Thank you Angela....It feels much better knowing that I'm not the only one going through this and at times I feel like I might be doing something wrong but now I know I should just hold on to loving and taking care of her regardless.thankx again

Angela - posted on 09/07/2009

Don't take to heart, i'm sure she still loves you just as much but shows it differently in comparison to her daddy. My little girl adores her father. She only see's him when he gets home from work at nights and the time they do spend together is spent playing and having fun. Whereas with me, i'm the one that keeps her to routine - feeds her, bathes her, disciplines her, changes her etc. How she reponds to her father is no where near the way she responds towards me but i know that doesn't make her love me less. Girls also have a special bond with their daddy, just like boys will always have a special bond with their mummy....don't take it to heart - as she gets older, she'll understand a lot more. Good luck...hope it gets better for you xo