5 year old son grabbing his "manly parts"

Jessica - posted on 01/09/2011 ( 22 moms have responded )

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Does anyone else have a child who is obsessed with grabbing at his "parts"? We are constantly telling our son to stop grabbing his birdy. He will look out the window and grab at it, he will watch tv and play with it for an hour if he could. Any advice? :)

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Shari - posted on 07/03/2011

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lmao!! my son now 5 found his at 2 and hasn't let go since, He doesn't constanly hang on to it anymore but it almost seems as though now and then he just has to check and make sure it didn't fall off. Every mother of boys I have talked to have gone through this and the more of a big deal you make the more it draws attention. And really if you think of it most adult males have to occasionally make sure everything is still there...:)

Danielle - posted on 01/21/2011

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For our son, it's not even about exploring or curiosity anymore, it's now become a habit. It's no exageration when I say that his hand is on there 24/7. While some of us hold our hands on our hips or in our pockets, his is on his manly parts...no matter where we are or what we are doing....for him, it's not even a councious decision for him anymore. When it came to our ten year old daughter who was doing this all the time, and not really caring where and when, I had a talk with her...telling her that this was normal, but there was an appropriate time and place for it. Well, this became a free for all for her, and she began doing it more and more and more, until she was now touching herself for most of the day (and she's homeschooled, so she certainly has the opportunity to do it for most of the day). It had even gotten to the point where every time we would all sit together to watch a show or a movie, she would either get her blanket, or start right there in front of us all, because she said that she couldn't go that long without doing it. In HER case, the more she did it, the more it became an obsession for her, and we had to put a stop to it by having her wear a bathing suit or bodysuit all the time. After we stopped this behaviour, her urges went away and the behaviour stopped. Now, our daughter DOES have OCD, so this might have been a reason why it got so out of control...but it has taught me that as normal as this behaviour is, I have seen for myself that it can become an unhealthy obsession....

Krystyn - posted on 07/07/2011

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hmm my son had that stage around two n a half. he's only three n a half n sometimes grabs himself but doesnt hold it like he used too. only holds it now when he doesnt want to go potty. god i hope it doesnt start back up again in a few years . Has he done this before?

MARIEL - posted on 01/24/2011

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My son does it all the time and I'm teaching him that by doing that I think he wants to go to the bathroom all the time. He's four everytime I see him, I just asked him do you need to do #1??? I think it's funny he doesn't like it that I asked him if he wants to go to the bathroom especially that he's on that stage of his life that he learned to go to the potty and he can do it by himself.

Catherine3 - posted on 01/20/2011

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Had this problem and got great advice ,never say any thing negative or shamfull. this is normal,just distract

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Jasmine - posted on 09/18/2012

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My 5 year old started putting his hand down his pants at 4 and has been doing it at school, they make him wash his hands every time, at home we make his go to the bathroom to pee, this makes him frustrated. The school makes us feel really bad about him doing this. I'm glad to hes not the only one. He's our only, and none of our close friends have kids his age.

Sabrina - posted on 06/09/2011

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My son started exploring that region when he was 2 or 3 years old. My in-laws and some of their friends told my son that if he played with it, then it would fall off. I know young boys go through an exploring stage so I wasn't worried but would reassure him that it doesn't just fall off. We had a discussion a few months ago because he likes having his hands down there and he told me that everyone told him it was going to fall off and he was checking to make sure it was still there. I think for a young age is fine but I would be a little concerned if he was older around the 6-7 year old range and still did that. For now, my son doesn't have his hands in his pants like he use to but when he sleeps he has one hand in his pants like Al Bundy style.

Sarah - posted on 01/20/2011

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My son grabs himself all the time, and he is 19 months. We let him as long as its not in public. Its his body and I think he is just curious and discovering himself. My younger brother also did this for a long time, until he was about 4 or 5. I just think its important for boys to figure out what that thing hangin between there legs is. But good luck.

Danielle - posted on 01/20/2011

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OMG my 5 year old son does the very same thing, except that he does it 24 hours a day. His hands are on there ALL THE TIME, and although we understand that this can be a normal behaviour, we realize that it's not normal to be holding on to his penis all day long. Our son is 5, but has a mild developmental delay, so he functions as more of a 3 year old...so he doesn't really understand when we explain to him that this is not an appropriate behaviour. We have even gotten very firm with him about it...and then 10 seconds later, there it is...right back on it again...I'm finding this to be the MOST frustrating thing to deal with right now, and I have almost slapped his hand out of sheer frustration, and we have NEVER raised a hand to our son! This is my 5th child...you would think that I should know what to do my now...but it's my first boy, and I'm really at a loss with this one...It's not even about exploring anymore, his hand just lives there 24/7.

Summer - posted on 01/13/2011

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Well thank u i am not alone my son is 2 and that is his life always holding his penis even when i tell him not too, his hand are always in his pampers that i keep him in pants most time but knowing i am not alone so do help.

Kirsten - posted on 01/13/2011

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My 21 month old does it all the time as well. I discourage it, but it's normal so I'm not really worried.

Michelle - posted on 01/12/2011

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I have four boys. It's perfectly normal. My oldest (twins) seem to be more 'obsessed' with their male parts then the younger two. Heck, when they they were toddlers (7 yrs now) they used to sword fight with their male parts. One time, they thought if they pulled it really hard it would make them jump farther. That was pretty funny. Another time when they started realizing that their male parts got big they started crying that they 'broke it' and could Mommy kiss it to make it better. Yeah, riiiight. No.



You can kind of see where this is going. Now the older ones don't 'play' with themselves like they used, but when they are watching tv or relaxing their hand does stray.



I would just let him be. Maybe take some time to talk about personal space and privacy. If you and/or your husband think he's getting a little to obsessive about his male parts have a talk with him. Otherwise, it sounds like he's being a boy. Good luck.

Christy - posted on 01/12/2011

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HAHA! My baby brother used to do that. We would yell at him to "Get your hands outta your pants!" all the time. That didn't work at all, BTW. Just gently let him know there's a time and place for that, and not for the whole world to see. It will take some time repeating this but he will eventually get it.

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Telling him it's o.k. just in the house might work for him that it is a private special thing to do. Just make sure to tell him that it is NOT o.k. for someone else to touch him except his Dr. and parents when check up/cleaning/bathing him. I know I am downer but if you are subtle and not make a big deal about it he will learn to respect himself and others.

Rajalique - posted on 01/10/2011

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Yeah my son went through that stage a couple of months of go..My husband and I tried to get him to stop....and it wasn't until he accidentally got soap in it until he decided to stop.....I noticed that if you don't make such a big deal out of it they will eventually stop....Just explain to them that it makes others feel uncomfortable when he grabs it in public and that if he feels like he needs to do that he needs to grab it in the restroom or in his room...not in public

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My younger brother would sit in front of the TV with his hand in his pants, like Al Bundy. My son is almost two and when its bath night he hangs onto it like its going ot fall off. It a boy thing.

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As I like to say, it's the beginning of a life-long love affair! Totally normal and I don't think there is really anything you can do about it, unfortunately! The best you can do is to tell him that those are his private parts and that it's not polite to play with our private parts in front of other people. That's the best I got!

Claire - posted on 01/10/2011

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They say let them touch. My brother ran around naked since he could take his diaper off, and that was YOUNG. If you don't let them discover those things then it will hurt their self esteme when they get older. My daughter touches her downstairs every chance she gets and she is 16 months. She reaches down her diaper and plays all the time. I asked my doc and she said just let them do it.

LaCi - posted on 01/10/2011

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Mine's been running around naked most of his life. He REALLY discovered his penis around a year and a half old. they've been the best of friends ever since. Personally, I just don't really care. It's normal. If anyone happens to be disturbed by it, they can choose not to look. If he wants to fiddle with it for hours, so be it.

Jodie - posted on 01/10/2011

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I have 2 boys. We never had that problem with our first one, he's almost 9. The second one, he's almost 4, holds it like it's his best friend. I was doing the self check-out at Walmart one day and I turned to put a bag in the cart. What did I see??? His junk hanging out in the middle of Walmart and him playing with it. Naturally I was horrified, but LMAO when he wasn't looking. I don't think anybody noticed but who knows. Obviously I don't know how to get him to stop. We've had the conversations that it's something he should do in his room or the bathroom and not in the middle of a store. I'm hoping it's something he'll grow out of but knowing his dad, probably not. LOL! Good luck!

Amy - posted on 01/10/2011

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My almost two year old does too! I've NEVER been around little boys and asked hubby if it was normal. He said "he's just grabbing his pieces. Just like when they discover ears. They can't help it. They found out it feels good." As much as it set my mind that it's normal, I don't want him with his hands down his pants either! lol. I don't know what to do either. Sorry. :(

User - posted on 01/10/2011

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he is only doing what they all do, i have 3 girls and from what i have seen every child wants to explore, i think sometime's if u pay to much attention to it then he will fine it even more fun xxxx

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