Screaming when she doesn't get her way!

Jenni - posted on 08/09/2010 ( 1 mom has responded )

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In my home we do TO's. My SD is 3 years old and is pretty well behaved expect for one thing. My SO hates giving TOs and gives plenty of warnings hehe. He also is in the habit of caving into tantrums a bit more than me in order to stop the screaming. Which my SD has become very good at! She'll scream in her high pitched voice when she's told "no". And she can go on for half an hour straight! I talked to my SO about it and he's been a lot better lately on not giving in just to stop the screaming and giving her a TO after a warning to stop screaming. The problem is she'll continue screaming the entire length of TO. We're not sure if we should just ignore the screaming during TO or not start the timer until she calms down? It just doesn't feel like she's learning her lesson if she just continues screaming in TO. She only stops when we go and talk to her about why she's in TO. Are we doing the right thing and should we just keep on? Or is there a better way?

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Sarah - posted on 08/09/2010

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The biggest thing is consistancy. Both of you have to be on the same page and discipline in the same way or nothing will work. When you do the time out explain why she is having the time out right away. Also explain what will happen if she starts screaming while she is sitting in time out. My rule is you can cry during time out, but if you start to scream for attention then you are put into your room and I then will decide when you can come out. Sometimes that means once you calm down and other times that means you need to calm down and then spend the 2 minutes you had for the time out. This helps with the screaming. They scream because they want that attention which is then not doing what the time out is suppose to be. I do think it is important to explain why they are going to time out....or how can they learn. But I choose when I tell them not the child. I think it helps to explain when you first put them in time out and then again when they are done with time out making sure they understand why they were there.

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