What do I do when my husband seems to have NO patience with our kids???

Christina - posted on 12/13/2008 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I know there are days when I am short on patience and don't respond well to the challenges our kids put us through. But it is so much harder to sit there and watch my husband respond in *horrible* ways when our three year old is misbehaving. . . or our 1 year old is being overly needy. . . or any of the other one million possible challenges our kids can pose to us on any given day. He's a good dad. . . but there are times I just want to shake him!

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Tammi - posted on 12/16/2008

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Have you tried to have him see life through the eyes of your children? If he puts himself in their shoes maybe he will better understand and not be so quick to react.For instance could you imagine that you are hurting but have no way to tell someone what hurts or as for the 1 year old not understand why you hurt.This seems to work for me as well when I feel short tempered I just stop breathe and remind myself and to help them through it.Plus if he reacts with anger then he is only teaching them anger, try to tell him that it is an opprtunity to teach the kids how to deal with their emotions.Well hope this helps some and good luck to you.

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Sarah - posted on 12/13/2008

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My husband, on his own, went and found a mentor in the church we attend. He found someone he admired and someone he wanted to be like. This man taught my husband a lot about patience with our little boy, with me, and with countless other lessons.



It worked for us, but your husband may not be open to doing that. In any case, I would talk to him and ask him about other areas of stress that he is carrying. We all know that what happens at work doesn't always stay there, extended family, bills, a waning economy, looming forclosures...the list goes on.



My advice is to be as patient and understanding as you can WHILE running interception with the children. It will not last forever, darlin'. You can get through this.

Katie - posted on 12/13/2008

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We have four children, all under the age of seven years. I sat him down and explained why it bothered me so bad and we came up with this solution: We chose a code word that either one of us can say to the other when we just can't handle the stress at the moment. That code word entitles us to go to our room, go outside, whatever we need to do to regroup. Obviously we can't be gone for the rest of the day, but 15 minutes toa half hour works just fine. Hope this advice helps some.

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